Older subs(30+) submitting to young Dom/mes(19-23)

[Teen_switch]

I am a young dom/Master and it is satisfying to have an older submissive.Do older subs tend to feel more humiliated and in submission while submitting to someone younger.Having over 2 years of experience,it is difficult to find serious submissives that wish to submit to someone younger.I believe submission is more mental than sexual and age is not an influential character.

 

[PaxNurgle]

I think the main issue, speaking as a submissive/male, is trust and experience. We (speaking for myself here, maybe not for everyone) want someone who knows what they are doing, basically. We want to put ourselves in a compromising and humiliating experience for someone who we know and trust won't cause permanant damage to us. Think of it like, would you rather trust an experienced surgeon to operate on you, or an intern still in medical school?

Also, in a situation you describe, there tends to be a "Older Guy Creeping on Younger Women/girls" dynamic which many subs- again, speaking for myself here- find to be a bit of a turn-off. We want to be submissive to someone who has similar shared life experiences- both in terms of kink, and just life experience in general.

And personally, I have seen a LOT of 19-23 year old dommes- almost all female, who are in it strictly for monetary reasons- their "kink" is first and foremost to find an older sugar daddy type for financial domination, with BDSM/kink play only secondary to that. Again, some guys may be into that, but as an older guy, lets just say that isn't my thing- and thus, a lot of us 30+ guys are VERY leery of jumping into a D/s dynamic with a young female domme for this reason.

If you are looking for a sub, then I do wish you luck, and it helps to be clear what you are looking for and be honest about your experience is. Don't let me discourage you; I am sure there are plenty of subs who do love submitting to someone much younger, and who do get off on the humiliation kink of it.

 

[wicked woman]

I only submit within an intimate relationship and since I have no interest in having such a relationship with someone a lot younger than I am, I would not be interested in being an 'older sub'. I would ask you what's the reason that you find an older submissive better for you. You might have better luck in a top/bottom relationship versus a Dom/sub relationship. For example, if you want to top someone using rope or a flogger, to perfect your skill, you might have better luck finding an older person to bottom. It's unclear to me what the advantage of age would have though.

 

[Teen_switch]

I think the main issue, speaking as a submissive/male, is trust and experience. We (speaking for myself here, maybe not for everyone) want someone who knows what they are doing, basically. We want to put ourselves in a compromising and humiliating experience for someone who we know and trust won't cause permanant damage to us. Think of it like, would you rather trust an experienced surgeon to operate on you, or an intern still in medical school?

Also, in a situation you describe, there tends to be a "Older Guy Creeping on Younger Women/girls" dynamic which many subs- again, speaking for myself here- find to be a bit of a turn-off. We want to be submissive to someone who has similar shared life experiences- both in terms of kink, and just life experience in general.

And personally, I have seen a LOT of 19-23 year old dommes- almost all female, who are in it strictly for monetary reasons- their "kink" is first and foremost to find an older sugar daddy type for financial domination, with BDSM/kink play only secondary to that. Again, some guys may be into that, but as an older guy, lets just say that isn't my thing- and thus, a lot of us 30+ guys are VERY leery of jumping into a D/s dynamic with a young female domme for this reason.

If you are looking for a sub, then I do wish you luck, and it helps to be clear what you are looking for and be honest about your experience is. Don't let me discourage you; I am sure there are plenty of subs who do love submitting to someone much younger, and who do get off on the humiliation kink of it.

I understand your point and I agree with you completely.I myself have noticed the financial greed floating around in the name of femdom.
Anyways as you said,experience matters I already cleared it out that I am no newbie and know well how to dominate my subs. I have had experiences both online as well as irl.
Thank you for your thoughts!

 

[Teen_switch]

I only submit within an intimate relationship and since I have no interest in having such a relationship with someone a lot younger than I am, I would not be interested in being an 'older sub'. I would ask you what's the reason that you find an older submissive better for you. You might have better luck in a top/bottom relationship versus a Dom/sub relationship. For example, if you want to top someone using rope or a flogger, to perfect your skill, you might have better luck finding an older person to bottom. It's unclear to me what the advantage of age would have though.

Thank you for your insights!!

 

[PaxNurgle]

I suppose I could also understand, in the right mindset, the humiliation and power exchange aspect of it. There are many aspects of BDSM other than impact and rope play, and many activities I might be persuaded (okay, COERCED, remember I'm the sub here!) into being subjected to with no need for a safe word. Forced bi, chastity, small-penis humilation, Toilet play (I hesitate to mention that one since it makes a lot of people squeamish) and foot/boot worship are some of the more sensuous, non-impactful activities I enjoy, and I suppose I could explore these things with a much younger person but yet, I would hope it wouldn't come across as too awkward if the age difference is too great.

And I say, if you want to explore your dominant side at an early age, then MORE POWER TO YOU by all means! Enjoy the beauty and power you have over people both older and younger, and learn, explore and experience all you can- that's what life is about! In retrospect, I only wish I was as secure in the knowledge of myself and my own sexuality as you are when I was in my 19-24 age bracket.

 

[Teen_switch]

I suppose I could also understand, in the right mindset, the humiliation and power exchange aspect of it. There are many aspects of BDSM other than impact and rope play, and many activities I might be persuaded (okay, COERCED, remember I'm the sub here!) into being subjected to with no need for a safe word. Forced bi, chastity, small-penis humilation, Toilet play (I hesitate to mention that one since it makes a lot of people squeamish) and foot/boot worship are some of the more sensuous, non-impactful activities I enjoy, and I suppose I could explore these things with a much younger person but yet, I would hope it wouldn't come across as too awkward if the age difference is too great.

And I say, if you want to explore your dominant side at an early age, then MORE POWER TO YOU by all means! Enjoy the beauty and power you have over people both older and younger, and learn, explore and experience all you can- that's what life is about! In retrospect, I only wish I was as secure in the knowledge of myself and my own sexuality as you are when I was in my 19-24 age bracket.

Thank you for your feedback

 

[SweetBaybeeGirl]

I understand your point and I agree with you completely.I myself have noticed the financial greed floating around in the name of femdom.
Anyways as you said,experience matters I already cleared it out that I am no newbie and know well how to dominate my subs. I have had experiences both online as well as irl.
Thank you for your thoughts!

I am just learning so I have no qualms about learning with a younger Domme. Safe is all I ask. And respect.

 

[Teen_switch]

I am just learning so I have no qualms about learning with a younger Domme. Safe is all I ask. And respect.

What is your age?

 

[SweetBaybeeGirl]

What is your age?

33

 

[Teen_switch]

33

Still pretty youngg.
Hope you find your match!!

 

[SweetBaybeeGirl]

Still pretty youngg.
Hope you find your match!!

Not old enough for you?

 

[submissa]

Personally, I'm not interested in submitting to someone much younger... I'm about to turn 35 and I don't think I could go younger than 30 - and I definitely prefer that they be older than I am.

ETA - not every sub is into the sort of humiliation you describe.

 

[roxanne1971]

I agree that experience goes a long way. I have met a couple of young men who had such a vibe though that if they pushed it I may have been interested.

 

[submatsi]

I am a young dom/Master and it is satisfying to have an older submissive.Do older subs tend to feel more humiliated and in submission while submitting to someone younger.Having over 2 years of experience,it is difficult to find serious submissives that wish to submit to someone younger.I believe submission is more mental than sexual and age is not an influential character.

I would love to submit to a young dom/dommi

 

[OldGoodPup]

As an older (60s) male, sub, I can tell you that for me there is nothing more exciting than (imagining) submitting to a younger woman. We both know she's way out of my league. We both know that I'm older, taller, heavier, stronger, (allegedly) wiser, more experienced and perhaps even wealthier. And yet here we are, when she opens her hand, palm up, and I stand on tip toes to place the balls I carry for her between her fingernails, we both also know who has complete control . Is there anything I wouldn't do to just imagine bedding a young, beauty like her? Of course, not. I'd do anything just for the opportunity to lick and suck her lover's seed from her beautiful sex.

 

[Lonelyinwa]

I am a young dom/Master and it is satisfying to have an older submissive.Do older subs tend to feel more humiliated and in submission while submitting to someone younger.Having over 2 years of experience,it is difficult to find serious submissives that wish to submit to someone younger.I believe submission is more mental than sexual and age is not an influential character.

Yes I prefer a younger dominant . Makes the experience more humiliating and more of a turn on for me.

 

[Showmewhatchugot84]

I could be wrong as I've never really thought on this subject, just an impulse thought while going through the thread but possibly it has an authoritarian aspect to you. Most of us as we get older find it hard to see someone much younger as an authority figure, or at least it's much easier to see someone older than you as such.

 

[PaxNurgle]

And I agree generally, as stated, HOWEVER, I also think, from my own experience (both as a sub and in life in general) that you can still be open to learning new experiences from younger people, and even being open to submitting to them as a teacher (and even as an authority figure.)
For example it's like one of those "Programming the VCR" things (anything with new technology basically.) I'd defer to a younger person for, because as I tell everyone, being a computer wiz in 1984, when I was an ace programmer of Microsoft Floating Point Basic, is pretty worthless in 2024 when computer languages have evolved with 40 years of technology. I digress here but the point is, even with the age difference, younger people have DIFFERENT experiences than me and I can still learn from them. My biggest hang up would be, I love submitting to and being "compromised" by a strong female. In general, much younger women are likely to be less experienced in BDSM skills. But not necessarily completely INexperienced. Maybe even VERY experienced, in fact. Which, in the end, is really what I would want. But if she is that much younger than me, would she just find it to be a "Creepy old man" dynamic, or would she get the same thrill out of it that I would?

 

[likitisplit]

i'm 68 so if i submit to someone chances are the will be younger. if they were 19 i'd be ok with it