Shy girl comes back

Meredith noticed Bill's pause, but wasn't too worried about it. She in fact was expecting it. She hoped that Bill kept encouraging her to go on and on. Today, she was in the mood for pushing her limits as far as she could. It had taken her a lot of time to be in front of Bill like she was now, and she wanted to take advantage of her surprising courage of the day. She didn't know for sure whether Bill would be still interested, but so far she seemed like it.

"Y-yes, Bill. I'm feeling so good today, you are making this quite easy for me."

She had so many things to thank him, and she wanted to do it right.

"Please, continue, Bill. Guide me forward..."

"Well, then... Why don't you take off the mask?" he suggested. Meredith's mask had remained in place even as her robe had gone away. Bill felt it was important that Meredith admit that it was she who wanted to be there before him; that it was Meredith and not some anonymous girl behind a mask.

"I want to know that it's Meredith here with me; not just Meredith's avatar."

"Can you face me as simply Meredith and no one else?"

His request caught her by surprise. That mask had been her companion for a long time in that "perversion" (as his boy had called it). It was part of her person, indivisible.

But that was Bill in front of her. She had trusted him before with many things she had trusted no one else. Could she be her real self for him?

She felt some part of her didn't want to. But she also felt she needed to do it. She wanted to please him and jump out of the cliff for him.

Slowly, she started pulling up the mask. Breathing deeply and feeling both scared and release.

"Yes, Bill. I'll be Meredith for you." she declared as she set the mask on the bed by her side.

Bill watched Meredith remove her mask and set it aside. He was terrified that he'd ask too much; that Meredith's nerve would break; but he knew that moments like this seldom, if ever, came again. It was a miracle that Meredith had come back as she had, after two years.

He didn't think she'd come back again if they stopped now.

He spoke to her again. "Meredith," he said softly, "you're giving so much... "

"It's not fair, but I have to trust that this is what you really want... That you want to give yourself more completely than you were ever able to before, with me..."

Bill took a moment to carefully observe the way Meredith sat, with her feet tucked behind her, though not underneath her body. He could fairly say that he saw her breasts, now, even though they were shadowed. Her pubis was in a darker shadow, and her legs, although not crossed in front of her, partially obscured it.

He knew that simply shifting Meredith's legs would not remove the shadows from the room, or from her body, but he also knew that, in opening her legs, she would feel - know - that she was gradually giving up the mysteries of herself.

"Meredith," he asked, "can you put your feet on the floor?"