The Author's Hangout Vending Machine

[doormouse]

and you get a panty wearing card table

I put it a Winnie the Pooh watch

and you get an irate christopher robin who charges you with theft

I put in the Black Eyed Peas *I don't want them back lol*

 

[The_Darkness]

and you get an irate christopher robin who charges you with theft

I put in the Black Eyed Peas *I don't want them back lol*

And you get a Black Eyed Betty S&M doll

I put in all of Metallica's work between 1992 and 2008 *Don't want them back, either*

 

[Handley_Page]

And you get a Black Eyed Betty S&M doll

I put in all of Metallica's work between 1992 and 2008 *Don't want them back, either*

and am enthusiastic voice says "Thanks".


I put in a box of old 45rpm records

 

[Noor]

and am enthusiastic voice says "Thanks".


I put in a box of old 45rpm records

and you get the Nutcracker

I put in a painting of a hiking dragon

 

[TE999]

and you get the Nutcracker

I put in a painting of a hiking dragon

And you get back a Harry Potter sweatshirt.

I put in Doctor Who's Tardis...

 

[Handley_Page]

And you get back a Harry Potter sweatshirt.

I put in Doctor Who's Tardis...

and you get the clock owned by the "Master"


I put in a Dalek

 

[andy_charles]

and you get the clock owned by the "Master"


I put in a Dalek

And you get a salt shaker for your troubles

I put in a wanted poster

 

[The_Darkness]

And you get a salt shaker for your troubles

I put in a wanted poster

And you get a movie of the same name that is full of people who can actually act but chose not to.

I put in a scratched up PlayStation disc.

 

[andy_charles]

And you get a movie of the same name that is full of people who can actually act but chose not to.

I put in a scratched up PlayStation disc.

And get a bandicoot looking increasingly unstable

I put in the latest number one single...

 

[The_Darkness]

And get a bandicoot looking increasingly unstable

I put in the latest number one single...

And you get some asshat producer cranking "music" out through some band formula populated by people that neither sing nor play their own instruments.

I put in an original Thriller record, still in its original shrink wrap.

 

[Noor]

And you get some asshat producer cranking "music" out through some band formula populated by people that neither sing nor play their own instruments.

I put in an original Thriller record, still in its original shrink wrap.

and you get a sidewalk that lights up when you step on it

I put in a model who can't dance

 

[Austin8]

and you get a sidewalk that lights up when you step on it

I put in a model who can't dance

and you get Dance Dance Revolution

I put in a weed weasel

 

[Handley_Page]

and you get Dance Dance Revolution

I put in a weed weasel

and the pilot of the F111 gets the bird.

I put in an ejector seat.

 

[Noor]

and the pilot of the F111 gets the bird.

I put in an ejector seat.

and you get a parachute

I put in a scanner

 

[TE999]

and you get a parachute

I put in a scanner

And you get back a police radar signal.

I put in a broken go-kart...

 

[Handley_Page]

And you get back a police radar signal.

I put in a broken go-kart...

which does not play "go".


I put in a draughts set.

 

[Chantilyvamp]

which does not play "go".


I put in a draughts set.

And you get back a twister game.

I put in my broken pam tillis cd

 

[TE999]

And you get back a twister game.

I put in my broken pam tillis cd

And you get back an autographed copy of 'Akey, Breaky Heart'.

I put in 2 tickets to a cancelled George Jones concert...

 

[Handley_Page]

I put in 2 tickets to a cancelled George Jones concert...

and you get the refund in full.

I put in a maglite torch.

 

[doormouse]

and you get the refund in full.

I put in a maglite torch.

and every battery factory in the world explodes

I put in an egg ring

 

[Handley_Page]

and every battery factory in the world explodes

I put in an egg ring

and the chicken squawks.

I put in a Elbloian dictionary

 

[Austin8]

and the chicken squawks.

I put in a Elbloian dictionary

and you get an albino thesaurus

I put in a bag of dry cat food

 

[Handley_Page]

and you get an albino thesaurus

I put in a bag of dry cat food

and you get a litre of drinking water.

I put in an LED torch

 

[Austin8]

and you get a litre of drinking water.

I put in an LED torch

and you get an LCD clock

I put in a 120v plug adapter

 

[Handley_Page]

and you get an LCD clock

I put in a 120v plug adapter

and you get a blown fuse in the 240v circuit.

I put in an Elm tree