Is it inevitable for a bottom to feel feminine?

[Escierto]

Yes, and that is how my wife and I felt. She even likes me to wear lavender or jasmin scent so I smell pretty for my man, her.

That’s cool that she was into it.

 

[TrailerHitch]

I have been thinking about all the responses saying it’s submissive not feminine. I can understand that because the two are definitely not synonymous.

However let us consider the case of my girlfriend and I. A while ago I confessed to her that when she fucks me, I fantasize that she is impregnating me. She laughed and admitted that she also fantasizes that she is impregnating me.

As I understand it, impregnation takes place when a male inseminates a female with his sperm. If we both are fantasizing about impregnation, would it not follow that she is imagining that she is the male and I am the female?

Look I don't mean this in a negative way, but I am sure you will be offended but here goes. Your girlfriend may be transgendered but biologically she is a man with a functioning cock. So she is the male, and so are you.

 

[Escierto]

Look I don't mean this in a negative way, but I am sure you will be offended but here goes. Your girlfriend may be transgendered but biologically she is a man with a functioning cock. So she is the male, and so are you.

She definitely has a functioning cock.

 

[TrailerHitch]

She definitely has a functioning cock.

Then she is a male. She may look like a woman, and live as a woman, and you may believe she is a woman, but with a functioning cock and no female reproductive organs she is a male.

 

[Escierto]

Then she is a male. She may look like a woman, and live as a woman, and you may believe she is a woman, but with a functioning cock and no female reproductive organs she is a male.

Outside the bedroom, there is really nothing male about her. She has been a girl her entire life, treated and accepted as such by her family and community.

 

[TrailerHitch]

Outside the bedroom, there is really nothing male about her. She has been a girl her entire life, treated and accepted as such by her family and community.

I believe you. But that doesn't change biology now does it?

 

[Escierto]

I believe you. But that doesn't change biology now does it?

Actually biological research shows that the sexual organs and gender identity in the brain are not always in sync.

 

[stickygirl]

Actually biological research shows that the sexual organs and gender identity in the brain are not always in sync.

...and then it's down to semantics.

Do you ask a person you meet what their genetic marker is before you decide if they're a man or a woman or do you try to be polite?

 

[Escierto]

...and then it's down to semantics.

Do you ask a person you meet what their genetic marker is before you decide if they're a man or a woman or do you try to be polite?

That’s like asking to see their genitalia which has happened in some of these places. I always wonder, do they not have any sense of shame? Is there one shred of decency and humanity left in these worthless scum?

 

[stickygirl]

That’s like asking to see their genitalia which has happened in some of these places. I always wonder, do they not have any sense of shame? Is there one shred of decency and humanity left in these worthless scum?

I feel your anger, but I'm not convinced it helps. Using language like that only puts people's backs up and they stop listening 'la-la-la-la'. If we can't convince them ( we won't ) then the topic needs to drop off their anger-radar. Stick with boring, science-based evidence and they'll lose interest.
When I used to face those kinds of provocations, I'd just smile and say 'sure'. Burning down people's houses solves nothing - tolerance is often the best we can hope for.

Anyhow we've gone off topic...

 

[TrailerHitch]

If I am interested in someone I believe is a woman that I have every right to ask if they are a biological woman as they have to ask me if I am a biological man. If a man is seeking a biological woman then being surprised at some point while intimate with a transgender has all the potential of going horrifically bad if it is an unwanted surprise. Obviously if you meet them in a gay or transgender club you should make a pretty good assumption that they are transgendered. If you meet them in a corner bar or club why would you make that assumption?

Look I'm not anti any sexual orientation, but be honest upfront and let your potential partner decide if they want to go down that path. It seems like the fair and honest thing to do.

 

[stickygirl]

If I am interested in someone I believe is a woman that I have every right to ask if they are a biological woman as they have to ask me if I am a biological man. If a man is seeking a biological woman then being surprised at some point while intimate with a transgender has all the potential of going horrifically bad if it is an unwanted surprise. Obviously if you meet them in a gay or transgender club you should make a pretty good assumption that they are transgendered. If you meet them in a corner bar or club why would you make that assumption?

Look I'm not anti any sexual orientation, but be honest upfront and let your potential partner decide if they want to go down that path. It seems like the fair and honest thing to do.

Don't worry - she'll tell you before it comes to surprises. It's in her best interests.
Since you're in the LGBTQIA forum, you need to allow some language leeway, just as if you were in that transgender bar.

 

[Escierto]

I feel your anger, but I'm not convinced it helps. Using language like that only puts people's backs up and they stop listening 'la-la-la-la'. If we can't convince them ( we won't ) then the topic needs to drop off their anger-radar. Stick with boring, science-based evidence and they'll lose interest.
When I used to face those kinds of provocations, I'd just smile and say 'sure'. Burning down people's houses solves nothing - tolerance is often the best we can hope for.

Anyhow we've gone off topic...

You are way more optimistic than I am about these people. At this point I don’t care about persuading them. I don’t care about annoying them or irritating them. I don’t care about provoking them. They are the enemy. They are Nazis and they need to be fought just as the Nazis were fought.

 

[TrailerHitch]

Don't worry - she'll tell you before it comes to surprises. It's in her best interests.
Since you're in the LGBTQIA forum, you need to allow some language leeway, just as if you were in that transgender bar.

Why not be up front and tell me right away? Time together will probably not change a straight guys mind to want to have sex with a transgendered person. It just seems to me that it would reduce the possibilities of rejection after feelings may have started.

 

[TrailerHitch]

You are way more optimistic than I am about these people. At this point I don’t care about persuading them. I don’t care about annoying them or irritating them. I don’t care about provoking them. They are the enemy. They are Nazis and they need to be fought just as the Nazis were fought.

I'm the enemy because I would want someone to be honest with me about their biology. Really? That makes me a Nazi? Dude you are a fucking idiot. You wanted a trans girlfriend, I'm sure many others do too, but not everyone. Do tell what is the benefit of not being honest up front, or at least on the first date? I just don't see that surprise after a relationship has started being a good idea. You can disagree if you want, that's your right. Honesty and trust are the foundations for a relationship, not deception in the hopes that it won't matter. If a girl I met was a trans I would want to know right away. Give me the option to continue or bow out gracefully. Yes its that simple.

 

[stickygirl]

Why not be up front and tell me right away? Time together will probably not change a straight guys mind to want to have sex with a transgendered person. It just seems to me that it would reduce the possibilities of rejection after feelings may have started.

No one is obligated to wear a sign on their head. Sorry if past rejections have hurt your feelings

 

[Dishrag]

No one is obligated to wear a sign on their head. Sorry if past rejections have hurt your feelings

Kudos to you ma’am for being both rational and fucking (language leeway?) hilarious!!

 

[dodgeboy2]

No one is obligated to wear a sign on their head. Sorry if past rejections have hurt your feelings

I totally agree with you on this topic, although it is something that is difficult. He does maybe have a right to know, however why would she let him know at that early stage of meeting since who knows where this could lead and opening up so soon may be difficult for her to do at that point. I'm sure if there becomes a point where she thought this has the possibility to turn into something she would broach the subject before anything builds up sexually. I am a married man to a woman, however if I was single I would never have asked or expect a woman to tell me her born gender at a point so early on, yes I would expect to be told at one point so I could have the option to opt out, which I can honestly say I couldn't tell you what my answer would be. I think maybe he is afraid if he began to have feelings for her would that make him gay or something, I really don't know. I will also say this if you or anyone falls for that woman (who may have genitalia different from what you expect) should it really make a difference what was between the legs. I fell in love with my wife and I truly believe is she in fact was born a female trapped in a man's body I would have still married her since it's the person you love not what is between the legs, yes it made it easier for me to be able to be in a "normal relationship" but if it wasn't I/we would have found a way to work it out.

 

[Escierto]

Why do transphobic men always feel that there are legions of transgender women out there waiting to surprise them with a sausage fest? I think it speaks to their anxiety about their own sexuality - they are worried that one hot chick with a dick is going to be all it takes and then - WELCOME TO GAY WORLD!

When she was dating my girlfriend never left this issue unclear or unspoken. She spelled it out in the most explicit possible terms and I am sure such is the case with most if not all.

 

[dodgeboy2]

Why do transphobic men always feel that there are legions of transgender women out there waiting to surprise them with a sausage fest? I think it speaks to their anxiety about their own sexuality - they are worried that one hot chick with a dick is going to be all it takes and then - WELCOME TO GAY WORLD!

When she was dating my girlfriend never left this issue unclear or unspoken. She spelled it out in the most explicit possible terms and I am sure such is the case with most if not all.

I know as I stated above if my wife was different I would have went to whatever world it took me to, gay, straight, bi, trans does it really matter I mean aren't we all just people 1st, who freaking cares!

 

[Escierto]

I know as I stated above if my wife was different I would have went to whatever world it took me to, gay, straight, bi, trans does it really matter I mean aren't we all just people 1st, who freaking cares!

In an ideal world where seldom is heard a discouraging word and the skies are not cloudy all day, your last sentence would govern human behavior. Unfortunately we live in a land where such is not the case and never will be.

 

[dodgeboy2]

In an ideal world where seldom is heard a discouraging word and the skies are not cloudy all day, your last sentence would govern human behavior. Unfortunately we live in a land where such is not the case and never will be.

I am optimistic it will hopefully in my lifetime, which I know at 65 is in the latter part of it but I still hope I will se that day!

 

[TrailerHitch]

No one is obligated to wear a sign on their head. Sorry if past rejections have hurt your feelings

I'm sorry but you are a fucking idiot. Honesty is important in any relationship. I do just fine thank you very much, and I don't have to lie about who I am to find a companion. You must be really insecure if you can't even be honest about who you are with a potential lover.

 

[TrailerHitch]

Kudos to you ma’am for being both rational and fucking (language leeway?) hilarious!!

Rational? Lie about who you are to a potential lover. Golly nothing could go wrong there could it?

 

[TrailerHitch]

Why do transphobic men always feel that there are legions of transgender women out there waiting to surprise them with a sausage fest? I think it speaks to their anxiety about their own sexuality - they are worried that one hot chick with a dick is going to be all it takes and then - WELCOME TO GAY WORLD!

When she was dating my girlfriend never left this issue unclear or unspoken. She spelled it out in the most explicit possible terms and I am sure such is the case with most if not all.

I'm hardly transphobic or homophobic, in fact I have placed multiple ads here looking for a bi-curious partner. I even posted an ad looking for a top transsexual woman. All I'm saying is if you are secure in what you are why hide it? Why not be up front and open about it? Why not save yourself the pain of a rejection later on?