How do you say goodbye?

[Purrde Flower]

Friday afternoon my kids are going to go live with their dad until the end of July. Of course I will be visiting them as much as possible every other weekend if not every weekend.

I have had several talked with my oldest two (7 and 5 yrs) about this move. They understand that they aren't going to live with dad forever but just until mom can get us our own place.

I have 2 younger ones also. One is 3 and the other is 18 months. My 3 year old has been told but doesn't understand why mom can't come. He is very upset about this. I have even told the youngest. Finaly got him to start giving me kisses with his mouth shut He looks like a little fish.

Convincing myself that they are going away just for a few weeks is how I can stomach this right now. It's very hard. It hurts. I have even made myself sick over the stress and worry. I kow they will be ok and I know this is the best for now.

Friday is the day. How can I say goodbye with out my heart beating. Without it hurting so much.

 

[Romial]

I don't say goodbye...ever.

I say "I'll cya later." because I will...at somepoint.

 

[Rex1960]

Friday is the day. How can I say goodbye with out my heart beating. Without it hurting so much.

You'll probably won't get over the hurting part, no matter what you do or say.

I have only one babygirl. I pick her up every second weekend and each time i have to bring her back to her mom it cramps my stomach i could just puke. Although I know her mom is the best I could think of for my baby. It just hurts.

 

[Purrde Flower]

Re: Re: How do you say goodbye?

You'll probably won't get over the hurting part, no matter what you do or say.

I have only one babygirl. I pick her up every second weekend and each time i have to bring her back to her mom it cramps my stomach i could just puke. Although I know her mom is the best I could think of for my baby. It just hurts.

I had stomach cramps for almost a week that just ended a few days ago. Went to the emergency room finally and the doctor told me I need to learn to relax because I was so stressed out I was making myself sick.

I remeber one time when I first tried to leave my ex. I left without my kids because I was going to stay in a womens shelter. I didn't even make it halfway for all the tears and the pains. All I could see was my children smiling at me. I turned around.

 

[acitore_vuli]

Friday afternoon my kids are going to go live with their dad until the end of July. Of course I will be visiting them as much as possible every other weekend if not every weekend.

I have had several talked with my oldest two (7 and 5 yrs) about this move. They understand that they aren't going to live with dad forever but just until mom can get us our own place.

I have 2 younger ones also. One is 3 and the other is 18 months. My 3 year old has been told but doesn't understand why mom can't come. He is very upset about this. I have even told the youngest. Finaly got him to start giving me kisses with his mouth shut He looks like a little fish.

Convincing myself that they are going away just for a few weeks is how I can stomach this right now. It's very hard. It hurts. I have even made myself sick over the stress and worry. I kow they will be ok and I know this is the best for now.


Friday is the day. How can I say goodbye with out my heart beating. Without it hurting so much.

You have 4 children and don't have your own place?

 

[Purrde Flower]

Re: Re: How do you say goodbye?

You have 4 children and don't have your own place?

No we live with my mom right now. She isn't here much anymore but I want my own place. Haven't been seperated from ex that long and I havent worked much at all in the 7 years of my marriage.

 

[Guest]

 

[Purrde Flower]

Why not stay with mom longer in order to keep the kids?

You mentioned womans shelter? Is Dad the safest place for them?
ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DO THIS? It happens alot where it becomes permanent. Will you want to "uproot" them again?

Maybe its the best thing you can do right now. If hes a good dad, and the kids love being there, it mught be a great welcome for them to spend time with Daddy. Remember though, it may be hard to get them back legally if they are settled in and happy with Dad.


Im sorry you feel so terrible right now. I cant imagine wats you are going through

I have explored all options and it has taken me a very long time to do this. I am not sure I want to do this but for right now I truly believe it is the best thing for my kids to be in a safe and stable enviornment with someone who loves them. (there are severe issues with my mom when she is here that aparently can't be worked out when she is drunk, which is 95% of the time.)

Their dad is very good with them. Tons better than he ever was with me. A fountain of patience.

My ex won't take legal action against me (like child custody wars)as long as I agree to follow the certain rules we both have set up for as long as the kids are there. I have some very serious ammunition against him that I have promised to never ever use as long as he doesn't try to gain full custody.

They will be coming to live permanently in July again. They are my life and if I didn't believe with all my heart that this is the best desision for them not me right now I would never ever do it.

If they call in the paratrooper reserves for the upcomming war (if it takes place) they will be coming home early.

 

[brokenbrainwave]

restraining orders always worked for me

 

[Purrde Flower]

restraining orders always worked for me

restraining order for what?

 

[brokenbrainwave]

restraining order for what?

nm, here have some kool-aide

 

[Purrde Flower]

nm, here have some kool-aide

sugar free?

 

[brokenbrainwave]

sugar free?

even lactose free. Pay no attention to the powdery subtance. Thats only sachrine

 

[Purrde Flower]

even lactose free. Pay no attention to the powdery subtance. Thats only sachrine

...

 

[Rubyfruit]

Good luck, PF. My heart was breaking just reading this. I can't imagine being separated from my children, but it sounds like you are doing the best thing for them right now.

The time will fly by and soon they will be back in your nest again.

 

[bad kitty]

Bless your heart Purrde. I am glad you took our advice and went to a lawyer to help make this decision. I'm not gonna lit eto you and tell you it will be easy, but what you have to do is stay focused while they are gone and remember to work your hardest to possibly get them back sooner. I can't imagine having to go through that. If you ever need anyone to talk to, my PM box is open. Damn pregnancy hormones... I am crying.

 

[Purrde Flower]

Well.. this is going to be hard for me. I can feel the pit of my stomach falling out. He is going to be here early tomorrow. I thought or hoped I would have at least until Friday evening.

 

[Hillbilly_Honey]

I honestly feel for you. I can imagine what a heart wrenching decision this was to make. Being a mother means doing what is best for the children, even if it does break our hearts in the process. Have faith in yourself and the fact that you are doing the right thing for them and things will work out.

I wish you all the best.

 

[Guest]

 

[Romial]

I say take my advice, it'll make the kids feel better.

 

[Guest]

 

[intrigued]

My God.

I'm without the right words, so I will just say bless you.