Incompetently Flirt with the Lister Above You

[Ratchetman1982]

Hey, I have boobs. I won't show them to you though. Wanna hear about my childhood trauma?

Can I tell you about the mating habits of Yangchuaonosaurus? Then maybe we could actually them out .

 

[Sexy_Singer]

Have I got a tool for you.

 

[Apisto42]

Have I got a tool for you.

I can sharpen that up with my angle grinder!

 

[PotNoodle79]

I can sharpen that up with my angle grinder!

*adjusts glasses*
did you know, the angle grinder was invented by the German company ACK a.s. in 1954?

 

[Apisto42]

*adjusts glasses*
did you know, the angle grinder was invented by the German company ACK a.s. in 1954?

Wow, do you whisper such sweet facts to all the boys?

 

[PotNoodle79]

Wow, do you whisper such sweet facts to all the boys?

Only where angle grinders are involved!

 

[Apisto42]

Only where angle grinders are involved!

Well then, let’s get out the table saw and smooth cut some boards!

 

[cheekygirl75]

Well then, let’s get out the table saw and smooth cut some boards!

Hey there, can I play with your table saw?

 

[Apisto42]

Hey there, can I play with your table saw?

Only if you know how to twiddle the knobs correctly!

 

[Wand3rlust]

I’ll grind your angle - know what I’m saying? Nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more…

 

[Apisto42]

I’ll grind your angle - know what I’m saying? Nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more…

“What’s it like?”

 

[Sunlover102]

"Hiya.....hey What brand of adult diapers do your wear?

 

[sister jenny]

I notice you smell really bad. I haven’t showered for awhile either.

 

[Wand3rlust]

I'd like to kiss you, but I worry that my beard would catch on yours and we'd be locked together in some weird velcro nightmare..

 

[Saltfountain]

It's ok. We could pluck the hairs from your beard one by one like petals from a flower...

She loves me... She loves me not

Until it was bald and smooth

 

[Chatgetsme]

Can we rub our bald parts together?

 

[Saltfountain]

You pluck mine, I'll pluck yours

 

[AlwaysDancing]

I can’t recall the last time I had a good pluckin’

 

[Saltfountain]

I thought your nickname was banjo?

 

[Chatgetsme]

Mmmm… You’ve got me strung up like a banjo — tight, tuned, and ready to play

 

[Saltfountain]

They call me banjo too...

But I think that's more to do with everyone wishing I'd fuck off the moment I appear

 

[Gotlehorn]

Yeah I spose inbreeding is a thing where I’m from but high six me if you agree we’re made for each other!

 

[Drek8]

I made a tree drawing with tissue paper, do you want to see it? dont mind the stickiness though

 

[snexxer]

I've been told I've got Val Kilmers eyes. I dont really know who's they are, they're in this box, want to see?

 

[MrPimms]

You make me pee my pants. I mean laugh. I pee when I laugh.