Lit Homeless Shelter

[muddler35]

Howdy. This is my first attempt at a semi-serious thread, so please bear with me if I ramble a bit getting to the point.

A cherished friend of mine, who is an absolutely amazing soul and one of the most beloved people here, recently told me that she feels “homeless” on lit these days. I’ve been thinking about that a lot.

During the Covid lockdown, I was away from my friends and family living on a boat in Miami. It wasn’t possible to go out and meet new people. Lit became my social outlet. I made the most amazing friends, picked up an enemy or two, laughed and cried with some of you, romances came and went. I learned a lot about myself, and I learned a lot about community.

Now that the lockdown is over and we are all getting back to our real lives, I’ve noticed relationships breaking down, friend circles going asunder, people just disappearing.

I think my friend is not the only one of us feeling “homeless”

I’d like to start a thread for people to say what their Lit experience has been to them. Did you meet your best friend here? Find love? Get your heart broken?

Most importantly, I’d like this to be a home for the homeless. Anything you want to talk about. Anything goes, just be kind. We are all friends and neighbors. A community.

 

[Nevyn_Black]

Now that the lockdown is over and we are all getting back to our real lives, I’ve noticed relationships breaking down, friend circles going asunder, people just disappearing.

I think my friend is not the only one of us feeling “homeless”

I’d like to start a thread for people to say what their Lit experience has been to them. Did you meet your best friend here? Find love? Get your heart broken?

I've been here for decades and it is always the same. The big difference this time is that there are many people who barely came here, that for a time, came here often. Daily. All day long sometimes. Someone precious to me (who I met here) recently pointed out that the internet is a tool and should never be anything more. Covid caused some of you to build lives online, for the first time.

When you do not have the luxury of going outside and finding people and connections, the people and connections you make through this plastic box, become real. You become emotionally invested and suddenly this place becomes 'real'. You can no longer shrug it off and tell yourself that it doesn't matter once you turn off the computer, lay down your smart phone. You get hooked.

Maybe the people who are dropping this place got reminded that the internet is just supposed to be a tool and they feel like the amount of time and energy they spend on Lit is unhealthy. They want to go back to a time when they could just shrug and turn it off. Make believe that those they interact with here, do not really exist.

i've always been here. It has always been real and my life. I've met my best friend and found love. Lost love. Had my heart broken. The relationships formed here had bled through into my so called 'real life'. It is all merely a matter of perspective.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

What a really good and interesting topic, Mud.

I think I share some feelings and disagree in some ways.

For me I do feel a little homeless on Lit lately bc I don’t have a regular friendship circle that I interact with on Lit. I have friends off Lit and that’s not what I mean. But when I first got to Lit, I had a group (the audio thread at the time) and it’s where I met some of my nearest and dearest. Like everything will, that group slowly faded bc life happens and nothing is forever but it was the MOST fun. I see the newer class of Litsters forming these groups and it makes me smile and miss those times for myself. To be clear, I’m not talking about deep private connections, I’m talking about the interaction, the banter, the jokes, the community. I find myself in a weird place where I can lay out a stage for others to play in and really enjoy that but I feel weirdly out of place whenever I participate. Is it in my head? Maybe. But aren’t all our feelings.

Now, where I disagree is that this is solely due to Covid. I think maybe it was intensified due to covid but the ebb and flow has been the same. I’ve been here 5+ years and there are The Ancient Ones who have been here decades. We’ve all seen it. The best thing is to appreciate it while it’s here if you’re in a flow and be flexible when you’re in an ebb. Not to mention, due to their careers, a lot of people were on Lit less during Covid. I know that’s true for me. Now, that the world has calmed down, I can be here more while others return to work and are around less.

I don’t know if there is any answer but to just create the home you want here and hope your neighbors invite you to the block party. There will be friends and love and sex and loss and restlessness. It’s just the magic of this weird corner of the internet. And now that Grammy PLP is done preaching, I’m going to relax in my recliner and watch my stories. Will someone bring me some tea?

 

[ydahecnot]

Lit is optional. If you’re not neglecting your kids or your job or other key real-life things, and it is camaraderie/romance/fun for you, then great. But if that worm turns, or if Lit is leaving you unsatisfied or frustrated, you should bail for a bit or forever. “Feeling homeless” would seem to apply.

As a long-timer, I didn’t notice more or less traffic during the pandemic, though that is just a nonscientific sense. The Chaos phenomenon started at the tail end.

 

[ydahecnot]

What a really good and interesting topic, Mud.

I think I share some feelings and disagree in some ways.

For me I do feel a little homeless on Lit lately bc I don’t have a regular friendship circle that I interact with on Lit. I have friends off Lit and that’s not what I mean. But when I first got to Lit, I had a group (the audio thread at the time) and it’s where I met some of my nearest and dearest. Like everything will, that group slowly faded bc life happens and nothing is forever but it was the MOST fun. I see the newer class of Litsters forming these groups and it makes me smile and miss those times for myself. To be clear, I’m not talking about deep private connections, I’m talking about the interaction, the banter, the jokes, the community. I find myself in a weird place where I can lay out a stage for others to play in and really enjoy that but I feel weirdly out of place whenever I participate. Is it in my head? Maybe. But aren’t all our feelings.

Now, where I disagree is that this is solely due to Covid. I think maybe it was intensified due to covid but the ebb and flow has been the same. I’ve been here 5+ years and there are The Ancient Ones who have been here decades. We’ve all seen it. The best thing is to appreciate it while it’s here if you’re in a flow and be flexible when you’re in an ebb. Not to mention, due to their careers, a lot of people were on Lit less during Covid. I know that’s true for me. Now, that the world has calmed down, I can be here more while others return to work and are around less.

I don’t know if there is any answer but to just create the home you want here and hope your neighbors invite you to the block party. There will be friends and love and sex and loss and restlessness. It’s just the magic of this weird corner of the internet. And now that Grammy PLP is done preaching, I’m going to relax in my recliner and watch my stories. Will someone bring me some tea?

Gilf PLP. Mo will so be hitting up your inbox

 

[muddler35]

Thanks y'all for your considered and unique perspectives. It always fascinates me when people can look at the same thing and see something so different.

 

[lacandy]

Lit is optional. If you’re not neglecting your kids or your job or other key real-life things, and it is camaraderie/romance/fun for you, then great. But if that worm turns, or if Lit is leaving you unsatisfied or frustrated, you should bail for a bit or forever. “Feeling homeless” would seem to apply.

As a long-timer, I didn’t notice more or less traffic during the pandemic, though that is just a nonscientific sense. The Chaos phenomenon started at the tail end.

Lit gave me a reason to neglect my kids and now my job! I mean throw a few goldfish crackers and fruit snacks out with some capri suns and you’re no longer neglecting…helpful tip for the parents!

I have never had a “home” here. I’ve never had a group that I talk to daily. I mean I think most people like me (I know a few who don’t ), and I interact with many people on different threads. I flit in and out depending on the demands of my life. And rarely does my name pop up on the Litster You Miss thread.

I actually wonder if during COVID things changed in dynamic because there is a decent population here that are married and this is t something they share, so being locked up…I mean down with your spouse made it harder to be here? I try to forget most of what happened during that time, but I don’t think I was here much? I’ve probably been here more in the past few months than I have in over 5 years…
Really I have no insight…just like to babble (which is why I’m here mainly I guess )

 

[PlanetaryNebula]

Lit gave me a reason to neglect my kids and now my job! I mean throw a few goldfish crackers and fruit snacks out with some capri suns and you’re no longer neglecting…helpful tip for the parents!

I have never had a “home” here. I’ve never had a group that I talk to daily. I mean I think most people like me (I know a few who don’t ), and I interact with many people on different threads. I flit in and out depending on the demands of my life. And rarely does my name pop up on the Litster You Miss thread.

I actually wonder if during COVID things changed in dynamic because there is a decent population here that are married and this is t something they share, so being locked up…I mean down with your spouse made it harder to be here? I try to forget most of what happened during that time, but I don’t think I was here much? I’ve probably been here more in the past few months than I have in over 5 years…
Really I have no insight…just like to babble (which is why I’m here mainly I guess )

I like your parenting style

 

[Mo_Bandy]

Lit mainly provides me comic relief and entertainment. I tend to disappear here and there when I get busy or a new Serial Killer doc comes on Netflix.

 

[ydahecnot]

Lit mainly provides me comic relief and entertainment and skanks. I tend to disappear here and there when I get busy or a new Serial Killer doc comes on Netflix.

Fixed your typo

 

[GessoOfJess]

I'm new and still trying to figure out if there's a place for me here. It isn't the easiest place to just dive in, so threads like this are great.

 

[JessGabriel]

I swear, it's a coincidence that I'm posting right below my husband. I love this idea for a thread. I started on lit back in 2011. I met some people I really connected with, and even found a Master and love that lasted for a couple of years. That person is still my best friend. I disappeared for years once I lost the urge to write, and just recently came back a few months ago when the urge came back. Now I'm not here just for the writing. I've met so many amazing people that have supported me through hubby's health journey. I wouldn't say I'm part of a group or anything. People certainly come and go. I've felt emotionally close to some of them, and it's been a hard lesson to learn that most people will fade away eventually, no matter how close you feel. Everything seems pretty short-term. So I'm doing my best to enjoy the company while I can and protect my heart against the loss of friendship when people inevitably move on. That sounds so morose. I'm a cheerful and happy person, I swear!

 

[muddler35]

Welcome y'all! Thanks for sharing.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

As far as Lit "homelessness", I am very much one of those, how could one say, "Wherever I may roam, where I lay my head is home" kind of people. Where I am at the moment, plop down, make it my home, until next time. I didn't really notice much of a change when Covid became the new normal, nor without. Yes, the people change, but Lit is still Lit, just as it was.

Did you meet your best friend here? I have made friends here. Best? not yet. The lack of in person interaction makes it harder for me to form that level of bond. It would take more time, more talking.
Find love? No. I don't think that would be possible for me here. I need physical closeness to form that kind of bond.
Get your heart broken? No. I am not the kind of person who gets heart broken. I won't allow myself to get that sorrowful. No matter what, I just keep moving on.

My lit experience is fun. I meet good people. I find entertainment. I find laughter. I find a lot of nudity, sexual innuendo, conversation, orgasms, and friendship.

 

[beachbaby179]

Wow. Great thread. I'm posting just as a placeholder so that I can find the thread again when I have more time to fashion a thoughtful post. I have much to say on this topic.
However. I'm camping until Thursday. Signal keeps cutting out. So I'm not going to try now.

 

[muddler35]

Wow. Great thread. I'm posting just as a placeholder so that I can find the thread again when I have more time to fashion a thoughtful post. I have much to say on this topic.
However. I'm camping until Thursday. Signal keeps cutting out. So I'm not going to try now.

Please do! I’ve told you this in private, but it deserves to be said publicly. You were the first person to welcome me into this community. Thank you. Anything you care to add will be appreciated. Be safe camping.

 

[spankableBelle]

I've always been homeless at Lit.
No matter how long I'm here or how long I'm gone, there's no place I belong on the threads. No place to come 'home' to.
Yet, it's the one place I've been able to be myself, without hiding, without fear of disappointing or disgusting anyone with my desires and kinks and person.
Maybe that's the telling part, though... That my self isn't all that great (there have been a few who've been trying to disabuse me if that notion and I appreciate them more than they know). Something I've been exploring the last few days...

Lit is a place that I love and hate. It can be amazing, and it can be completely awful. It helped me become the writer I am today, it helped me achieve some dreams because it gave me a place to gather feedback. But I never fit with the Author threads, either.

Nor the BDSM threads where I cut my teeth.

I gave up years ago on making female friends here, even though I really wanted some... I just never fit with the cool people. And it brings back those high school days where you're either IT or you're not... Where some places feel like home and other places feel as far from home as they possibly could.

I think Lit is wonderful. And I think it's a cautionary tale, especially when there are many who don't feel they belong, either.

 

[Dribble]

Homeless...that's an interesting way of describing it. But...in a weird way I don't know if that really captures it. I am not in the same place I was a couple years ago...and surely not where I was 20 years ago. I have given up searching for how it was. Moments come...moments go.

 

[Mei5ter]

Howdy. This is my first attempt at a semi-serious thread, so please bear with me if I ramble a bit getting to the point.

A cherished friend of mine, who is an absolutely amazing soul and one of the most beloved people here, recently told me that she feels “homeless” on lit these days. I’ve been thinking about that a lot.

During the Covid lockdown, I was away from my friends and family living on a boat in Miami. It wasn’t possible to go out and meet new people. Lit became my social outlet. I made the most amazing friends, picked up an enemy or two, laughed and cried with some of you, romances came and went. I learned a lot about myself, and I learned a lot about community.

Now that the lockdown is over and we are all getting back to our real lives, I’ve noticed relationships breaking down, friend circles going asunder, people just disappearing.

I think my friend is not the only one of us feeling “homeless”

I’d like to start a thread for people to say what their Lit experience has been to them. Did you meet your best friend here? Find love? Get your heart broken?

Most importantly, I’d like this to be a home for the homeless. Anything you want to talk about. Anything goes, just be kind. We are all friends and neighbors. A community.

My take on Lit, which I've said before (so apologies for repeating myself but I'm a guy and at my age that happens, usually after I walked into a room and forgot why)...

Lit is like the bar at the end of your street.

When you walk past on your way home, you can look in, and see what's going on and who's in.

Sometimes, the place will feel empty and you'll walk on by.

Sometimes, you'll stop in anyway and try to liven things up yourself. Or maybe just sit and nurse a beer or people watch.

Sometimes, there might be a group of folks. You don't know all, but you know some, and end up joining them. Maybe you listen more than you talk.

Sometimes, there might be a group of your closest friends, and you stay snd make a night of it. Best fun ever, and you're the life and soul.

Sometimes, your special person is in, and after a couple of drinks you're fucking her against the wall outside by the dumpster (unless it's a blazing dumpster fire of drama).

Apologies for torturing the analogy (it consented, promise). But this is why Lit isn't high school. It isn't the same people in the same place at the same time, so you don't often get the tight friendship groups which form our support networks. They're the exception.

I have quite a few people on Lit whom I'll happily chat with in the threads, plus my handful of close Lit friends. But my close Lit friends aren't all close friends with each other. Most aren't, in fact. And that's fine. I like my people as individuals, after all. And nothing is worse than when two of your best friends randomly don't get on.

 

[RachelWalsh]

I definitely feel like there are just a lot fewer people on lit now.

It isn't just that I get fewer replies, but a lot of other people have posts that get ZERO replies, post that I know would have gotten a ton of people really excited and engaged in the past.

I am not sure why, but it feels more like a ghost town, a deserted city street, downtown at 300am.

 

[MedicalMuse]

I’m a wanderer anyway, so I always feel homeless here. I have some really great friends from lit who have become great friends off lit. Some I’ve met in person, some I’d love to meet.
My personal experience is of ebb and flow. Sometimes I have more time and can fuck about. Other times, I don’t. I’m usually here in the middle of the night, browsing. Sometimes, between classes, I’m here during the day. Sometimes I login just to message privately with people and never touch the threads.
It’s all a balance.

And like most things, when I run out of time and something has to go for awhile, it will be lit. Though I will have ways -hopefully- of chatting with those I value most.

 

[muddler35]

My take on Lit, which I've said before (so apologies for repeating myself but I'm a guy and at my age that happens, usually after I walked into a room and forgot why)...

Lit is like the bar at the end of your street.

When you walk past on your way home, you can look in, and see what's going on and who's in.

Sometimes, the place will feel empty and you'll walk on by.

Sometimes, you'll stop in anyway and try to liven things up yourself. Or maybe just sit and nurse a beer or people watch.

Sometimes, there might be a group of folks. You don't know all, but you know some, and end up joining them. Maybe you listen more than you talk.

Sometimes, there might be a group of your closest friends, and you stay snd make a night of it. Best fun ever, and you're the life and soul.

Sometimes, your special person is in, and after a couple of drinks you're fucking her against the wall outside by the dumpster (unless it's a blazing dumpster fire of drama).

Apologies for torturing the analogy (it consented, promise). But this is why Lit isn't high school. It isn't the same people in the same place at the same time, so you don't often get the tight friendship groups which form our support networks. They're the exception.

I have quite a few people on Lit whom I'll happily chat with in the threads, plus my handful of close Lit friends. But my close Lit friends aren't all close friends with each other. Most aren't, in fact. And that's fine. I like my people as individuals, after all. And nothing is worse than when two of your best friends randomly don't get on.

This, sir, should be required reading for everyone here. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.

 

[beachbaby179]

I LOVE Mei5ter's bar analogy. It's a lot like that.

Homeless? Me? No. I just move around a lot if I don't like the neighborhood I'm in. I've been here for over a decade, and the place definitely isn't the same as it used to be. But that's because the people change, some come, some go, some come back (NRJ? that's you...).

And your circumstances change. So although I still check in here on a regular basis, I don't post nearly as much. So it may look like I'm gone, but I'm not. I'm just not as prolific as a poster. I used to involve myself in the games, sometimes for hours at a time, if some of my friends were online and we'd pass the time. I can't speak for everyone, but I came here in the midst of a miserable, terrible marriage that was falling apart and I needed the escape. Now I'm living alone, so anything that's going to get done needs to be done by me. I've also found my 'forever friend' and we travel, do stuff, and I don't have as much time to kill anymore.

But... friends, yes. I have found many people here who I consider friends. And i don't differentiate between online friends and 'in the flesh' friends. Raise your hand if you've heard me say this before - if we're friends, you're stuck with me. I don't make friends easily, so I play for keeps. And I think that in some ways, people you befriend on Lit can be better friends than anyone else - I can be more of myself here, and have discussions that I wouldn't dare have with some others. It seems more real sometimes. I have met over a dozen Litsters, and you can bet that if I'm traveling to your area and we talk a lot, that you'll be hearing from me with an invitation to lunch, or drinks, or something. Just to chat. Fara has turned into one of my best friends, and we still talk every day even though she's not here. We see each other on occasion. She's met my family and I've met hers. She named her dog after me, sort of. We travel together sometimes. I consider lots of people here to be true friends, some of whom don't post here anymore, a couple who have passed away and will never be back, and some who I met early on and are still here.

And love? Sure. There are people I've met on here who I will have a piece of my heart until that heart stops beating. I've always tried to be myself here, my whole self, and that means opening up to people. And once you build some sort of trust and open up to someone, you run the risk of getting the feels. It's backfired once or twice, but that's life. It's happened to me both online and in person. It's a risk we take as humans.

So when I feel homeless, it's because I'm expecting it to be the same as it was, and that's unreasonable. Change is inevitable. So I dive in, respond to a question, answer or send a random PM, and make a friend.

 

[barefootgirl69]

^^^ how can you not love her?

 

[Chillygirl]

I think when you’re new it’s easy to get caught up in everything and eventually that fades. Friends maybe aren’t such close friends anymore…if at all. It can be easy to get caught up in all the drama or like @Nevyn_Black said make this place your life.

This place was my lifesaver in 2020 and now I find myself needing to post less, step back more but it’s hard. There’s that FOMO and when I get bored or lonely I know this place is here. The dopamine hits are addictive!

But I’ve made friends, fell in love, had my heart broken, felt like one of the cool kids and now I’m back to being the loner in the back parking lot with my emo music and cigarettes lol.