Am I a sub?

NoJo · Mar 9, 2016

I have this thing going on online with a stunningly beautiful chatroom model: I just stare and stare at her face, for hours (and $$$). She smiles like a fucking Madonna. She doesn't have her mike on, but I have my cam and mike turned on and speak to her occasionally.

I don't want to lick her heels, grovel at her feet, be humiliated, teased or otherwise made to feel "bad" or "low" in any way. I just stare and become literally entranced by her beautiful face.

The experience for me is religious (and intensely, almost unbearably erotic).

Am I a "sub"?

twister947 · Mar 9, 2016

No. A sucker, perhaps, but not a sub. Hang onto your $...it will come in handy some day.

NoJo · Mar 9, 2016

I'd feel much more of a sucker buying an iPhone 6 I don't need than spending it on sex. Or buying a car, or even a house. I live pretty frugally. I'm willing to bet if I looked at how you spend your money I'd call you a sucker too!

La damnee elle la licorne · Mar 9, 2016

NoJo · Mar 9, 2016

I guess it's that the feeling of being entranced is one of surrender - it's basically a form of worship.

Thanks for not adopting a moralistic tone and giving unasked for advice! Previous poster was quite off-putting, I must say.

La damnee elle la licorne · Mar 9, 2016

NoJo · Mar 9, 2016

Gianbattista said:
We all communicate a little differently.

I think one could describe that entrance /surrender in other forms of lust and love too. . Inversely i do not always feel entranced by Gianbattista. Even though I enjoy doing laundry it is not particularly entrancing pairing someone's socks, for example. , even when one is devoted to them.

May I, with respect, suggest, worship is easier when you don't hear someone speak...if they have a funny voice or a low intellect, or perhaps they reveal, in talking, ideas that are abhorrent to you...whether it is ideologies or a love of particular genre of television or type of food? The love of a face is fleeting, because it is only part of a whole person, however glorious a face it is.

Would you seek this emotion in your day to day life? Can you imagine incorporating it with things you love less, like cleaning toilets and housework and going to work and maybe not getting the undivided attention of a person you adore?

Yes, I've had the Offputting Voice experience once or twice (I remember that scene in The Man With Two Brains). I've also had the converse - where the voice works -- certain female singers get me into that state.

I'm an Intense Focuser on a lot of different things, including my work -- but applying worship to household chores -- well that would be cool. Nearest I can get to that is some DIY.

Yes, the focusing on the face is literally fetishistic -- in a way no less than on the feet. But it's a very different experience for me. It reminds me of those extreme close-ups you'd occasionally get in 1930's movies -- you can see every pore of the star's face.

But most of all, it reminds me of (mediaeval) icon-worship.

There's an element of addiction in it too.

My RL partner is pretty worshippable, but loves doing housework. Which is cool for me: I can worship her while she vacuums, from the comfort of the sofa.

Collar_N_Cuffs · Mar 9, 2016

This doesn't seem like a submissive relationship to me. A sub is usually, ok, I said usually looking to be one half of a reciprocating relationship. Unless she is beaming dominance at you from behind her baby blues

your function in this relationship is strictly one of monetary input (not intended to be harsh).

That said, she may derive pleasure from your visits. Who can say? But unless you find yourself wanting to seek out a relationship where you are more actively placing the dynamic of power into another's hands, I would say that you are simply infatuated.

SpunThings · Mar 9, 2016

What Collar said. Do you want her to tell you what to do? If not, then I'd say no. You experience a heightened state perhaps, and that's lovely. However, being a submissive is about wanting to give up authority in some way in a relationship.

Am I a sub?

NoJo

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twister947

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La damnee elle la licorne

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La damnee elle la licorne

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Collar_N_Cuffs

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SpunThings

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