Something that has changed since your latest relationship started.

Misshotndeep

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We all grow and learn from our interactions with others. name something that has changed about you since you started your latest relationship. Good or bad. It is changing you.

I would have to say that I am not as sociable or empathetic. I use to be a save the animals, trees, kids, Ozone... well I was into saving things. Now I really find I don't care to much. EH.
 
Good thread. I've been married for some time, now.
In that time, I've learnt to be kinder to myself. And to strive to better every day.
 
I've learned from my relationship's to be more aware of other's feelings and how my words/actions can affect them.
 
I've learned a lot more about girls.

No, I'm NOT taking the piss.

I've gone from being raised in a family of all boys, to being the only male in a female household - Mrs Jett, our three daughters plus pets (yes, even they're all female).

Steep learning curve!

Which I wouldn't swap for the world. :heart:
 
I learned the importance of detachment. Love is wonderful but--like any extreme emotion--it's not a good idea to let it run away with you. Loving is an art and should approached as one rather than rushed into spastically.
 
I learned the importance of detachment. Love is wonderful but--like any extreme emotion--it's not a good idea to let it run away with you. Loving is an art and should approached as one rather than rushed into spastically.

This for sure.
 
Not to be such a catastrophic thinker...I've learned that that I am worthy of being loved...and that someone is prepared to make great sacrifices to be with me...

The other thing that's changed is my number of sexual partners has increased massively...:D
 
I was contemplating this question furthet and realized i learned some other stuff. I learned where my boundries are. Not sexual. I knew those. My emotional boundries. I learned that though I am capable of deep and true love i am most likely not going to find my equal. I am just to much effort for most men. I have also learned that having just one thing off can kill a whole relationship. It's a lot of kizmit. You just can't force that.
 
What has changed since my latest relationship started? Good thread...

In no particular order:
  • I have embraced Tool and all of Maynard James Keenan's side projects
  • I (try to) live and let live
  • I have learned two new elite sex maneuvers that I will keep in my sexual toolbox forever
  • I am approximately 85% less afraid of my own shadow
  • I watch TV shows and movies again <--is major accomplishment
  • I am learning the difference between mountains and molehills
  • I know way more about tools, engines, and work boots than I ever thought I would
  • I haven't put any holes in any walls, broken any plates, nor slammed any doors in well over a year
  • I am becoming much more comfortable in my own skin
  • I feel loved, and grateful :heart:
 
  • The Internet
  • Ubiquitous use of cell phones
  • Selfies
  • Facebook
  • On Demand Pr0n
  • Children having children
  • Wars in Iraq and Afghanistan that the US is participating in
  • 6 US presidents including 2 named Bush
  • No more bush on ladies
  • Boob jobs
  • Tattoos are the norm
  • Parents fighting teachers
  • 24/7 News cycles
  • 24/7 Sports News
  • 24/7 Reality shows
  • 800 TV channels and nothing's on
  • Two political parties in the US that cannot agree on anything at all
  • Middle class shrinking
 
Perhaps we all learn as we live...as we should.....

Marriage #1 (almost 20 years, the year he passed away from brain cancer):

*I was more immature than I realized
*I gave so much and expected I would receive the same (nope)
*I lived completely for him and my children (not a good idea)
*I grew in my relationship with The Lord (VERY good thing)
*I found I was stronger than I ever thought I could be (in sickness and death)

Marriage #2 (3 years now)

*Communication is vital
*Honoring him can be a blessing
*Finding my own way to be happy and continue our home life (learning)
*Being mom to my children as they become adults is absolutely awesome!
*My relationship with The Lord is my complete foundation and my eternity.


In both.....friends are incredibly important, in real life and a wonderful unexpected surprise on this site. I am so blessed!:rose:
 
Since my last relationship started and ended I've learned (or RElearned):

-the importance of independence. If you're there with me it's because I WANT you there. Not because I NEED you. That feeling should be mutual.
-How important it is to not let someone else's desires dictate the quality of your life
-trust your instincts and know when you're in a toxic environment. No more of this "oh just give it a chance" shit.
-know when you're being used
-if your partner willfully gets in the way of your basic human need for space then that person isn't a worthy partner
-sometimes in life you take a chance and it doesn't work out. Don't beat yourself up over it. You zigged when you should have zagged. It happens.
 
This is a list of things that I've learned so far. A relationship with yourself is far more valuable than anything you can have with anyone.

- My feelings are valid. Period. It's a bonus if he understands, relates or agrees with them.
- Letting go is a gift for YOURSELF. If you can't let go of the little things, chaos will rule your life.
- Love isn't enough, you also need to like the person that you're with. If you can't be friends with them, then your relationship will have a LOT of challenges. More importantly, you have to love yourself in order to be happy with life.
- Patience. Patience. Patience. (something I am working on myself)
- Communication. I used to think I'm a fantastic communicator, but I'm finding that communicating with a partner is a whole 'nother skill altogether.
- Their happiness should matter to you. If it doesn't, you're in the wrong relationship.

I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but these are the things that come to mind.
 
Yes, I am really digging the whole bondage vibe. I am finding it both sexy and very sensual. Makes me feel beautiful on the outside when I don't truly feel that way about myself.
 
I've learned not to settle or relie on shallow people who are only using me.
Just because you don't have a lot of money doesn't mean someone won't try to take what you have.
I've also come to the conclusion I'm too old and damaged to expect that anyone will be interested in me beyond what can I do to help them.
 
I've learnt that no matter how many times someone says something complimentary, I rarely, if ever, believe it.
It's quite a depressing realisation :(
 
I've learned that when I was younger, I was a real asshole and hurt some people I really cared about..
 
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