why do some lesbians hate men so much?

[killallhippies]

seriously. it's something i've noticed in rl and online. some lesbians seem to hate men more than they love women. it's disturbing.

i'm not saying the majority of them do, but a sizable minority seems to. do you feel there is something similar in the male homosexual community? is this just paranoia on my part? have you noticed anything similar? if so, do you feel it is bad or just natural?

so many questions, so little time.

 

[april-wine]

Looking from this side of the fence, heterosexual men often believe WE evil lesbians just haven't met right MAN....I think that's where a lot of animosity stems from KAH....

Then of course there are the ones that think lesbians ARE great as long as they are performing for them....lol


Again not all men are this way, but a sizable minority....heh

 

[killallhippies]

Looking from this side of the fence, heterosexual men often believe WE evil lesbians just haven't met right MAN....I think that's where a lot of animosity stems from KAH....

Then of course there are the ones that think lesbians ARE great as long as they are performing for them....lol


Again not all men are this way, but a sizable minority....heh

fair enough.

and to defend the use of the phrase sizable minority: i used it because i've run into "man hating dykes" too often for it to be a few isolated, prejudiced assholes.

 

[april-wine]

fair enough.

and to defend the use of the phrase sizable minority: i used it because i've run into "man hating dykes" too often for it to be a few isolated, prejudiced assholes.

I was just "pullin' your leg" hehe....But hey we can't ALL be men-haters....Personally I love men, I just don't wanna LOVE men....

 

[John Doe]

Well, that's an interesting question. Yes, I think sexuality and whether or not one is misandrist/misogynist can be related.

For what it's worth, it seems the "man hating dykes" I've run into are more asexual than homosexual.

I do think there is a similar phenomenon with some gay men, but generally thier misogyny isn't quite as obvious.

 

[Etoile]

Yes indeed, there are plenty of gay men who hate women. I've noticed that gynophobia is more prevalent in NYC than in the DC area.

As for lesbians hating men...I've heard of it, but I haven't met any who actively dislike males.

 

[Flight420]

seriously. it's something i've noticed in rl and online. some lesbians seem to hate men more than they love women. it's disturbing.

i'm not saying the majority of them do, but a sizable minority seems to. do you feel there is something similar in the male homosexual community? is this just paranoia on my part? have you noticed anything similar? if so, do you feel it is bad or just natural?

so many questions, so little time.

This is a curious question that I've never really understood myself. I "came out" in the very early 1980's (Dallas,TX) and I remember women (str8 or gay) not being allowed into or made
to feel very uncomfortable in the boy bars and I always thought that was incredibly wierd? Who else is going to hold all of our
purses while we go dance? LOL! In the mid 80's, while the whole AIDS thing was wreaking havoc in the gay male community (not that it's exclusive to gays...blah blah) our bar culture, as well as lifestyles, changed and the two communities seem to interact just a little bit more but nowhere near where it should be.

I've always been one to publicly state (which makes me a very unpopular boy sometimes) that the gay community will NEVER be a united community until it finds a way to rise above the petty, and often catty, prejudices that still fester deep within it and that goes for both the guys and girls. These are just my thoughts and opinions on the matter, I certainly cannot speak on behalf of every man or woman or the culture of every city... it is the truth as I viewed it over the years to include Dallas, TX and Los Angeles, CA.

 

[killallhippies]

Yes indeed, there are plenty of gay men who hate women. I've noticed that gynophobia is more prevalent in NYC than in the DC area.

As for lesbians hating men...I've heard of it, but I haven't met any who actively dislike males.

and i've never met any gay men who actively hate women. i wonder if it's just easier to notice when you're the object of the hate.

 

[Netzach]

Men always think you hate men overall, when really you just hate them.

 

[RavenSpirit2k4]

i wonder if it's just easier to notice when you're the object of the hate.

We have a winner!

 

[mystic_maiden32]

We have a winner!

I second that!

 

[killallhippies]

Men always think you hate men overall, when really you just hate them.

that could be true for some, but in my situation i'm talking about a coldness and disdain that is instant and doesn't just appear over time. i generally don't make simple excuses like that. i'm aware that people hate me for me. i'm also aware that not every woman is attracted to me. i learned that ages ago.

 

[janisjoplin197888]

.

"man hating dykes" .

I am thinking 'competition' may have a bit to do with it. Just my thought.

 

[killallhippies]

I am thinking 'competition' may have a bit to do with it. Just my thought.

what?

 

[adidasv40]

dtuykfhukfyuhkfuyik

 

[killallhippies]

word.

 

[deezire1900]

THis is hard to explain...but, I am not liked by both sides.

I am a lesbian, but the butchie woman whink I am a sell-out, because I am a bit of a princess. (hair, make-up, heels) It is so hard to make friends. I have good deep friendships that have stood the test of time, but they even seem to have to defend me to others. I always get labeled the Bi girl or the straight confused girl. I am not confused after 10 years of being with women.
Oh, and the str8 women hate me because the lesbian factor seems to be a pull for there husbands and boyfriends. I can't help it...I get along really well with boys. They are easy to talk to, and rarely judge. I like football, beer, strippers, and showing off my cute ass in fitted jeans.

So...i am an outcast....

 

[april-wine]

THis is hard to explain...but, I am not liked by both sides.

I am a lesbian, but the butchie woman whink I am a sell-out, because I am a bit of a princess. (hair, make-up, heels) It is so hard to make friends. I have good deep friendships that have stood the test of time, but they even seem to have to defend me to others. I always get labeled the Bi girl or the straight confused girl. I am not confused after 10 years of being with women.
Oh, and the str8 women hate me because the lesbian factor seems to be a pull for there husbands and boyfriends. I can't help it...I get along really well with boys. They are easy to talk to, and rarely judge. I like football, beer, strippers, and showing off my cute ass in fitted jeans.

So...i am an outcast....

Football I could care less about, but beer and strippers....I'm in, and ummmmmm a cute ass in tight jeans who could ask for more....

 

[Lightning]

Football I could care less about, but beer and strippers....I'm in, and ummmmmm a cute ass in tight jeans who could ask for more....

I second the statement, but being more interested in women than men as a general rule probably doesn't give a lot of credit to my ballot.

But I say, shake it, flaunt it, sway it, stroke it, if you got it.

 

[gagginforit]

Maybe it's something to do with them making it clear they don't want anything to do with men but men (some of us are just this stoopid) still approach them and bother them. That would tell them that the guy is either an idiot or doesn't give a shit about them or what they want.

 

[killallhippies]

Maybe it's something to do with them making it clear they don't want anything to do with men but men (some of us are just this stoopid) still approach them and bother them. That would tell them that the guy is either an idiot or doesn't give a shit about them or what they want.

maybe, but not from me. i learned a long time ago that lesbians are lesbians and that means they don't want to fuck me. i don't hit on women that i know aren't into it.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

seriously. it's something i've noticed in rl and online. some lesbians seem to hate men more than they love women. it's disturbing.

i'm not saying the majority of them do, but a sizable minority seems to. do you feel there is something similar in the male homosexual community? is this just paranoia on my part? have you noticed anything similar? if so, do you feel it is bad or just natural?

so many questions, so little time.

Luna's experiences ahead:

I used to have a serious deep seated hatred for all men. I could lay the blame on the fact of my past and that would be mostly true but it would not BE all of it.

Deep down, I had just always felt that men were a mistake. They were here to provide sperm to make babies and that was all. It took me quite a long time to get over actively hating all men for the sins of a few. Obviously, I have tried to work through my issues as I now live happily in poly-amorous bliss but it was a LONG road to walk and not the least bit fun.

Some women become feminists to extreme (I was one of them), some women are just too hurt and some are militantly angry (Yup I was one of those, too). It's not just about one guy (in that case) it's all guys, all the time.

I know it is wrong to harbor that sort of feeling NOW, but when I was living that way, it made perfect sense to me and believe you me there are still plenty of times when I feel the old anger and contempt raising it's ugly head.

The point to this is one can not make some one (or a portion of a community) change. All those changes have to come from inside and sometimes I am hopeful that they will, eventually, come.

Later
Luna

 

[Queersetti]

and i've never met any gay men who actively hate women. i wonder if it's just easier to notice when you're the object of the hate.

I have known a few gay men who hated and despised women with a viciousness that would chill you to the bone.

Me, I think they are just fabulous.

 

[killallhippies]

thanks Q and moon doggy. great responses. i've heard the ultra-feminist theory that men are an aberration before. it's always chilled my soul. it's so fascistic and evil hearted especially when you're the one considered to be inherently bad and even useless by some. some women have even mentioned it like it was joke before. it isn't funny.

 

[gagginforit]

maybe, but not from me. i learned a long time ago that lesbians are lesbians and that means they don't want to fuck me. i don't hit on women that i know aren't into it.

Sorry I didn't mean you. I'm talking about the sort of morons who go into lesbian clubs and hit on women, and stuff like that.