Who is polyamorous?

[OneColdMonkey]

Sorry, Never's thread got me curious. I've only known one polyamorous couple, a triad. Two bisexual women and one male. They actually have the happiest, most well-developed and open relationship of anyone I know. I've always been jealous of them for that, and just the sense of, I dunno, family they seem to have from having more then one partner, and all with each other.

 

[John Doe]

Is Polyamorous another newb I don't know about? I never get the memos anymore.

 

[OneColdMonkey]

Is Polyamorous another newb I don't know about? I never get the memos anymore.

As a bisexual, polyamory is something you really might want to look in to. Then you'd have the best of both worlds while having the best of both worlds!

 

[John Doe]

As a bisexual, polyamory is something you really might want to look in to. Then you'd have the best of both worlds while having the best of both worlds!

I already have. It's difficult, but I still am not locked into monogamy. It's an option, but not my only option.

 

[OneColdMonkey]

I already have. It's difficult, but I still am not locked into monogamy. It's an option, but not my only option.

What most people call monogamy is in fact serial monogamy. If we practised true monogamy, we'd all still be with the first person we ever dated.

 

[John Doe]

What most people call monogamy is in fact serial monogamy. If we practised true monogamy, we'd all still be with the first person we ever dated.

Well, you know what I mean.

 

[OneColdMonkey]

Well, you know what I mean.

Yeah, I'm just feeling like a know-it-all tonight. Droppin' knowledge in the hizzy!

 

[Equinoxe]

That's right, because he listens to metal that's not about dragons.

 

[Never]

I'm monogamous. It's just that people keep on dumping me.

I wouldn't mind being in a polyamorous relationship other than it would drive me crazy. I find it difficult to have that level of security with one person and can't imagine the type of work it must take to have it with two. At the same time, I am open to it.

Scared but open. That describes my reaction to most everything having to do with love, lust, and relationships.

 

[Tikee_Booming]

Yipeeeeee

What a subject for my very first post.


If you ever get the chance I've got a few words of wisdom....get a planner and invest in Tylenol. Oh wait, that's for monogamous relationships....
oh well.

if it's good....then send me a postcard from heaven.

 

[Never]

Greetings and Salutations Tikee Booming.

 

[Tikee_Booming]

Thanx

and you too!

p.s. LOVE the pic.

 

[Regis2001]

Polyamorous? Well, I wasn't planning to be. If my boyfriend is a serial polyamorist, does that count?

 

[Mermaid]

I know several very well adjusted poly people. I think it's a great idea, in theory.

I tried dating a woman in a poly relationship and I couldn't get past the other partner. Could be just a societal norm I have to overcome. Could be I didn't like her as much as I thought. Or could be I just can't get past a partner's other partner's other partner.

I read "The Ethical Slut" and learned a lot, about different relationship styles, and some new communication skills.


And Regis... Being poly and cheating are not the same thing, hon. I'm sorry you got done wrong.

 

[Raimondin]

Sorry, Never's thread got me curious. I've only known one polyamorous couple, a triad. Two bisexual women and one male. They actually have the happiest, most well-developed and open relationship of anyone I know. I've always been jealous of them for that, and just the sense of, I dunno, family they seem to have from having more then one partner, and all with each other.

Sounds like polygamy heaven!

 

[Bridget69]

I believe in monogamy.

 

[H piltdown]

We've been involved in alternative lifestyles for years. We began with straight swinging and progressed...a lot! For about two years, ending just a few months ago, we had another person move into our home and our bed.

In some ways, it was wonderful. There were no arguments about love or sex, we enjoyed each other's company tremendously and there was so much to share. The intimacy and warmth was incredible!

Unfortunately, life isn't always perfect. We were forced to hide our true feelings from our young child. The wrong thing said at school would have bought us a visit from child protective services even though we all acted as caring, supportive parents. But, this issue is no more difficult for many gay parents.

Like many relationships, the split was brought about by financial issues. However, we're still very close and see each other as often as possible.

We also have a few married bi friends locally, (through the power and the initial anonymity of the net), that have been involved with similar relationships, and from our experiences and observations the problems tended to stem more from outside influences than from personal issues.

Then, you have to understand that neither we or our friends are young or new to alternative lifestyles. We are no longer searching for some intangible definition of self. We are comfortable and accepting of our sexuality and are not as prone to youthful infatuations. We may have problems in some areas, but we enter into all relationships with no emotional expectations. If feelings begin to grow, we accept them, and cherish them.

Communication and acceptance of differences are always foremost in our thoughts.

 

[SweetErika]

I don't think bringing another person into our marriage would be right for us as a couple, but I can easily see myself having a deep, loving relationship with another woman.

 

[John Doe]

I believe in monogamy.

So you've dated the same person all your adult life?

 

[Netzach]

I am.

But I hate the word.

"Polyamorous"

Ugh.
It just conjures up meetings and three bean salads and frank and earnest discussions.

Likewise I hate the word "swinger" even more. I'm not that -we're not that.

I usually say I have an open relationship.

 

[SweetErika]

I am.

But I hate the word.

"Polyamorous"

Ugh.
It just conjures up meetings and three bean salads and frank and earnest discussions.

Likewise I hate the word "swinger" even more. I'm not that -we're not that.

I usually say I have an open relationship.

I'm not sure if you'd agree, but I don't mind using "polyamorous" as a way to describe myself (like I'd use bisexual) because I believe I truly have the potential to have meaningful romantic relationships with more than one person. I agree with you on not liking it as a way to describe my activities or relationships, so I usually go with "open relationship" or better yet, "my husband is supports my relationships with women."

 

[sexy-girl]

i don't really get people that say their polyamorous ... it seems like a very broad term ... i think my gf and i would consider perhaps having one off sexual encounters with other women (we haven't yet) ... does that make us polyamorous

i know i could never have a relationship where i had two girlfriends who i loved equally ... my gf takes up so much of my time and mental energy ... theres no way i could double that and stay sane so does that mean we're not polyamorous

whats the difference between a person that is in an equal loving relationship with 2 people and a person that is in a relationship with one person but might experiment once or twice with someone else outside that relationship?

So you've dated the same person all your adult life?

i don't think that matters when defining monogamy

 

[John Doe]

i don't really get people that say their polyamorous ... it seems like a very broad term ... i think my gf and i would consider perhaps having one off sexual encounters with other women (we haven't yet) ... does that make us polyamorous

No, polyamorous means willing to have romantic love for more than one person at a time. flings don't count.

i don't think that matters when defining monogamy [/B]

Monogamy is having the same partner for the rest of your life, like some other animal species. Serial monogamy is what most people call monogamy. It's having a series of monogamous relationships throughout your life.

OneColdMonkey also explained the difference recently in another thread here.

 

[sexy-girl]

No, polyamorous means willing to have romantic love for more than one person at a time. flings don't count.

does the romantic love have to be equal ?

 

[Netzach]

How could it be, we're all different people with different things to bring to the table...

I love my other partners and playmates very much, but not the same way as my fiance, nor the same way as each other.