Question

[Mikijl Dragon]

I consider myself Bi- curious having only preformed oral on one guy one time. I am married (wife enjoys the thought of me being bi).

My question is when does one go from being bi curious to just Bi? Is there such a line? Just curious as to what everyone’s thoughts on the matter will be.

 

[Angel]

Nobody else can really define it for you because it's an intensely personal thing - but once you cross your line, you'll definitely know.

 

[south_florida_bicur]

bi curious

In my opinion you are bi when you have some experience and you feel comfortable about your sexuality.

As for me I have no experience therefore I still consider myself bi-curious.

 

[Bitchslapper]

Some say it's like being a n00b. If you still have to ask if you're still a n00b or when you'll stop being a noob, then you're still a n00b.

...but I'm not one of them. I agree with south_florida_bicur in this instance.

 

[EJFan]

the philosophical approach

philosophically speaking, i think we're ALL bi to some extent. it's like the joke i heard (and if anyone knows where this is from, please remind me)...

a friend of mine is severely homophobic. he swore that any guy interested in cock was a deviant.

so i asked him, "do you watch porn?"

"hell yeah," he said.

"and do you only watch lesbian porn?" i asked.

he replied, "no... i like the man on woman stuff a lot."

"so would you like to see a tiny, shrivled up, half flaccid penis in those scenes?" i asked.

he began, "hell no... i want to see a big giant cock..." and then he realized what he was saying. too late, the truth was out.


anyhow... that's my little jokey thing to make a point. but back to the answer... the post about being comfortable in both hetero and homosexual situations is right on the money. if you find eroticism and enjoyment in both situations, you're bi. it can be from one experience or from the twentieth.

 

[south_florida_bicur]

I would not say "we are all a little bi".

I think most of us are bi curious but I would not even say all of us are.

 

[John Doe]

Most "sexperts" would agree with EJFan. They say most of us are bisexual to a greater or lesser extent, provided there isn't undue influence from overbearing parents or a particularly restrictive religion.

I think it's fair to say that there is a scale that we can be placed on that ranges from purely heterosexual to purely homosexual. Few people exist on either extreme. Most of us fall somewhere in between. Of course, those who identify themselves as heterosexul or homosexual probably lean more toward their appropriate end than those who say thay are bi.

Now, if one were two argue that "we are all a little bi" means that we all have the potential within us to feel sexually attracted to both genders, then I'd say I agree. Just as I think we all have it in us to kill, regardless of whether we think so or not.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

I consider myself Bi- curious having only preformed oral on one guy one time. I am married (wife enjoys the thought of me being bi).

My question is when does one go from being bi curious to just Bi? Is there such a line? Just curious as to what everyone’s thoughts on the matter will be.

everybody else explained it far better than i..but here is a thought anyway.

I came out to my mom before I had ever turned 18 (2 years) and I had never once thought of myself as *bi-curious* I was just bi-sexual.

Doing the deed does not make you bisexual, it's the whole thought process behind it.

 

[EJFan]

apet has a good point

apet has a great point that basically says the physical aspect of sex is separate from the emotional aspect of sex. to me, this is one o' those things that you think of but don't realize you're thinking of it and i'm glad she brought it up.

correct me if i'm wrong, but what you're saying is that you can have sex with the same and/or the opposite sex and not be defining your sexuality UNLESS you have something goin' on OTHER than the pure mechanics of sex.

that was a really interesting thought... i'm sorry i didn't think of it myself. good one, apet. i hope someone else is impressed by this thought 'cause i'd hate to feel like i'm the only one with the "aha" feeling.

 

[south_florida_bicur]

now i know why a gay friend of mine never tells anyone he is gay.

he does not understand why people have to put a title on everything.

why should it matter what sex you have sex with or even what sex you are in love with?

the most hated word in my vocabulary - society

 

[Mikijl Dragon]

You all are great

Thanks for all the great outlooks. I understand it a whole lot more with just this little thread. It is great to have other open minded people to talk to.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Re: apet has a good point

correct me if i'm wrong, but what you're saying is that you can have sex with the same and/or the opposite sex and not be defining your sexuality UNLESS you have something goin' on OTHER than the pure mechanics of sex.

that was a really interesting thought... i'm sorry i didn't think of it myself. good one, apet. i hope someone else is impressed by this thought 'cause i'd hate to feel like i'm the only one with the "aha" feeling.

i know quite a few guys and girls who can engage in sex play with members of the same sex but when it comes to a relationship...well they are heterosexual through and through.

I don't think that is bad or less real then what I consider myself...(more poly-amorous...which to me is loving more than one person of any gender at any time) but the mechanics of sex are not the be all and end all of bi-sexuality. (Or any other sort of sexuality).

It's the thoughts, the emotions, the way one FEELS..that makes a true bi-amorous/sexual person...NOT the sex act.

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

now i know why a gay friend of mine never tells anyone he is gay.

he does not understand why people have to put a title on everything.

why should it matter what sex you have sex with or even what sex you are in love with?

the most hated word in my vocabulary - society

I hate titles as well. Seems kinda confining...like I have to fit or fulfill a mold. I do know that labels are needed when one is involved in a community but it does get old...

At least with labels...

I can tell others that I am a *bi-sexual, poly, masochistic switch...*

who feels she is usually *soft butch* and others will kinda get where I am coming from. The ones who don't aren't involved in those communities and they don't need to know anything else!!!

 

[EJFan]

titles

i understand. i also dislike titles... the mere existence of "naming" things forces us to categorize everything and that, in turn, leads to the subconscious belief that a thing in one category can't exist (even partly) in another.

so, yeah, titles suck.

let's draw a parallel, shall we? look at diseases. once we have a name for a disease it can get all sorts of funding and research efforts devoted to it. until it has a name it's just a collection of symptoms. further, mental diseases are dismissed as reasons for actions UNLESS they have a name.

imagine how much broader things would be and how much more pleasant things would be if we didn't stick a label on things.

 

[south_florida_bicur]

" It's the thoughts, the emotions, the way one FEELS..that makes a true bi-amorous/sexual person...NOT the sex act. "

I could not have said it better myself.

Labels do suck and my friend is a 100% right. Why do we need to label everyone? Labels do create borders. If there were no labels I think people would get along better with others. THe more labels we have the more seperated we are.