Men now want women to be confident and make the first move

[Maeve_redux]

Hmmm . . . Y'know, I think I married someone very much like you. Hot Mama has for years maintained that she has a more typically 'male' brain. She thinks linerally, is organized and logical (when she's not exhausted) and is never 'coy' about what she wants. She may simply forget to tell me, but she never plays the hint-game. I'm grateful, very grateful. Being Asperger's I have even less capability to ferret out hidden meanings than more normal men. Pity polygamy hasn't been legalized, yet . . .

See? She and I are not alone out there. But, in this particular topic, people like us have been more or less ignored.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

See? She and I are not alone out there. But, in this particular topic, people like us have been more or less ignored.

That couldn't be because people who start threads like this have a slightly stereotypical viewpoint, could it? http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii177/1volupturary_manque/innocent.gif

 

[cloudy]

A little more thought on my age group.

As I've gotten older, I've watched the dating scene change, a lot, and honestly have started to classify women.

1) The post-college, I want a career woman. She is right now, steadily working on her career, but secretly believes she can find the right guy just before 30, settle down, have kids in her early 30's, but just isn't quite ready for that long-term relationship.

2) The late-20's, early 30's omg I've worked on my career and now my biological clock is alarming woman. She busted her ass, finally got comfortable in her career, now wants to get married and such, and pushes very, very hard for marriage. She generally seeks someone whom makes about the same or more than her, with desires to get married relatively quickly because her bio-clock is ticking heavily in her mind.

3) The I had fun in college, but so much that now I'm a single mom woman. She typically partied in college, had her fun, but is now a single mom. She wants a mature guy whom makes a decent paycheck/has a respectable career. Half of the time, though, she doesn't want anymore kids, as she may already have two or more, or one may be enough for her, so sorry nice guy, no kids for you. But, she expects you to love and raise her kids, within limits, remember, they're her kids. Oh and you may have to deal with the ranting of deadbeat dad, or deal with her ex visiting a lot for the kids.

4) The I got married early and am now divorced woman. Typically, she can be like the single mother above, and is typically like that woman. Or, she didn't have kids and just hates men and wishes to castrate them all. Other big issue, she's on the rebound, looking for acceptance, and when her confidence is back up, will leave you.

5) The I'm still partying and enjoying my 20's woman. She has no desire for a relationship, just wants to have fun with fuckbuddies.

There are a few more breakdowns, but those are the woman I typically find in my age group. There are many exceptions to these rules, but the percentage of women they represent is very small.

Go ahead, rip me to shreds for this, but this is the bare truth, not the ranting of random things, but an actual breakdown of how some of you women behave.

I'm not touching this, except to say that your lack of respect, lack of empathy, etc. for women is probably precisely why you aren't in a relationship.

You clearly think very little of us. No wonder you're single.

eta: I have another one for your "list" - the woman who's smart enough to leave you alone because you're not grown up enough to know that it's not all about you, and what a woman brings to you.

 

[SlickTony]

mean, wouldn't you prefer that people came to you with job offerings and publishing contracts, than having to scan the wanted ads and collect rejection slips?

Say it now and say it loud!!!!!

Because there's a woman nearby with thick black hair, and hazel eyes. She might weigh closer to 170, and stand 5'5". She has a round belly, round hips, heavy thighs. Her complexion is a little muddy, and her IQ is twice as high as yours.

The fashion masters view such people proportioned like that as grotesque, yet there are a lot of perfectly normal people like that, and it's not like they and fashion have parted company. People need to get their head out of the magazines and look at the world around them.

 

[Le Jacquelope]

Shame, isn't it? Could have been fun.

OK, after having actually read the entire thread now (miracles do happen), it occurs to me that there's something missing from the conversation here. What about the women who are just as 'clueless' as men are when it comes to the subtle signs?

*tires screech loudly, echoing across neighborhoods in the night air*

Woah. You mean some women can be clueless about subtle signs?

I thought women knew men inside and out...

 

[Liar]

*tires screech loudly, echoing across neighborhoods in the night air*

Woah. You mean some women can be clueless about subtle signs?

I thought women knew men inside and out...

Nah, if women knew men inside and out, they would have dropped the "subtle hint" routine ages ago and realized that the only way to get the point across is via verbal or physical 2x4.

 

[Le Jacquelope]

Nah, if women knew men inside and out, they would have dropped the "subtle hint" routine ages ago and realized that the only way to get the point across is via verbal or physical 2x4.

That's just because men are stupid. Just ask emap.

 

[Liar]

That's just because men are stupid. Just ask emap.

Well,, if they know we are stupid, why do they try to communicatoe with is as if we were telepathic? That's kinda stupid, no?:

 

[Maeve_redux]

*tires screech loudly, echoing across neighborhoods in the night air*

Woah. You mean some women can be clueless about subtle signs?

I thought women knew men inside and out...

heh... Women are friggin clueless. We just lie to ourselves and tell ourselves we're not.

 

[rgraham666]

heh... Women are friggin clueless. We just lie to ourselves and tell ourselves we're not.

Just like men.

 

[Maeve_redux]

Just like men.

Pretty much.

 

[DesertPirate]

Pretty much.

But women are better at acting like they know.

 

[Maeve_redux]

But women are better at acting like they know.

Pretty much. LOL...

 

[Corylea]

Back in 1982, I was in a bisexual women's support group. One day, the topic turned to letting a man know that one was interested in him, and most of the women were bemoaning the fact that it was very difficult to get a man to understand that they were interested in him. This was a college-based group, so most of the women in the group were young, thin, and attractive.

The least attractive woman there (by conventional standards) was a woman I'll call Georgette, and she surprised all of the other group members by saying that she had no trouble at all getting a man to realize that she was interested. Everyone asked her for her secret, and she said, "I find that putting a hand on his thigh usually works."

The rest of the women were flabbergasted and said that they couldn't possibly do something like that, and she shrugged and said it was up to them. I was amused that the "ugly" woman was better at getting what she wanted than all the pretty women were.

On the other hand (just because I can hold two contradictory opinions about the same topic ), I find that a lot of men like to feel like mighty hunters. A woman who indicates clear interest in them isn't exciting, because they haven't conquered her or won anything by getting her -- they need the chase to feel like they've won something. So the women who are the very best at getting men -- at least in my observation -- are the ones who perfect the ability to run away very, very slowly.

Unfortunately, I'm not dishonest enough to do this, myself, even though I know that it seems to be very effective. I'm much more likely to say point-blank, "I really like you, and I'd like to date you." Boring, boring, boring -- they look over my shoulder at the woman who's running away slowly.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Back in 1982, I was in a bisexual women's support group. One day, the topic turned to letting a man know that one was interested in him, and most of the women were bemoaning the fact that it was very difficult to get a man to understand that they were interested in him. This was a college-based group, so most of the women in the group were young, thin, and attractive.

The least attractive woman there (by conventional standards) was a woman I'll call Georgette, and she surprised all of the other group members by saying that she had no trouble at all getting a man to realize that she was interested. Everyone asked her for her secret, and she said, "I find that putting a hand on his thigh usually works."

The rest of the women were flabbergasted and said that they couldn't possibly do something like that, and she shrugged and said it was up to them. I was amused that the "ugly" woman was better at getting what she wanted than all the pretty women were.

On the other hand (just because I can hold two contradictory opinions about the same topic ), I find that a lot of men like to feel like mighty hunters. A woman who indicates clear interest in them isn't exciting, because they haven't conquered her or won anything by getting her -- they need the chase to feel like they've won something. So the women who are the very best at getting men -- at least in my observation -- are the ones who perfect the ability to run away very, very slowly.

Unfortunately, I'm not dishonest enough to do this, myself, even though I know that it seems to be very effective. I'm much more likely to say point-blank, "I really like you, and I'd like to date you." Boring, boring, boring -- they look over my shoulder at the woman who's running away slowly.

Hi, Corylea, and welcome to the AH and this thread, although you are probably somebody's AV. There are a few men who revel in the thrill of the chase, but these are the alpha males who are usually successful, both in this pursuit and in life in general. Most men, in my opinion, just want to get laid and, if that works out, establish a good relationship, possibly even marriage. That's why the less attractive woman you mentioned has no trouble with getting to know men.

As Liar said, itsometimes takes a verbal or physical 2 X 4.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stella Omega??
Because there's a woman nearby with thick black hair, and hazel eyes. She might weigh closer to 170, and stand 5'5". She has a round belly, round hips, heavy thighs. Her complexion is a little muddy, and her IQ is twice as high as yours.

Say it now and say it loud!!!!!

The fashion masters view such people proportioned like that as grotesque, yet there are a lot of perfectly normal people like that, and it's not like they and fashion have parted company. People need to get their head out of the magazines and look at the world around them.

Tony, you may be interested in knowing that men rarely read fashion mags, except sometimes the bathing suit or lingerie sections. I may be wrong, but I believe a majority of the "fashion masters" you mention are women, and a high percentage of the men there are gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm not trying to encourage a stereotype, but I think it's a true one in this case.

What I am saying is that most men pay no attention to what fashion dictates and are attracted to women with "womanly figures" and cheerful dispositions. We make jokes about skinny fashion models and actresses who look like Ally McBeel. It's a shame that a few loud voices drown out what most people are saying.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stella Omega??
Because there's a woman nearby with thick black hair, and hazel eyes. She might weigh closer to 170, and stand 5'5". She has a round belly, round hips, heavy thighs. Her complexion is a little muddy, and her IQ is twice as high as yours.



Tony, you may be interested in knowing that men rarely read fashion mags, except sometimes the bathing suit or lingerie sections. I may be wrong, but I believe a majority of the "fashion masters" you mention are women, and a high percentage of the men there are gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm not trying to encourage a stereotype, but I think it's a true one in this case.

What I am saying is that most men pay no attention to what fashion dictates and are attracted to women with "womanly figures" and cheerful dispositions. We make jokes about skinny fashion models and actresses who look like Ally McBeel. It's a shame that a few loud voices drown out what most people are saying.

Amen, Brother Box, and again I say Amen! Women suffer from trying to impress each other. Men are much easier to please because being hard to please only gets you pleased less often.

 

[dr_mabeuse]

Amen, Brother Box, and again I say Amen! Women suffer from trying to impress each other. Men are much easier to please because being hard to please only gets you pleased less often.

No, it's true: It's all our fault. It's all our fault. Castrate the lot of us.

 

[rgraham666]

Keep me out of your life's plans, thank you very much.

 

[Maeve_redux]

No, it's true: It's all our fault. It's all our fault. Castrate the lot of us.

Then what fun would you be?

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Keep me out of your life's plans, thank you very much.

Me, too!

 

[Le Jacquelope]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stella Omega??
Because there's a woman nearby with thick black hair, and hazel eyes. She might weigh closer to 170, and stand 5'5". She has a round belly, round hips, heavy thighs. Her complexion is a little muddy, and her IQ is twice as high as yours.



Tony, you may be interested in knowing that men rarely read fashion mags, except sometimes the bathing suit or lingerie sections. I may be wrong, but I believe a majority of the "fashion masters" you mention are women, and a high percentage of the men there are gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm not trying to encourage a stereotype, but I think it's a true one in this case.

What I am saying is that most men pay no attention to what fashion dictates and are attracted to women with "womanly figures" and cheerful dispositions. We make jokes about skinny fashion models and actresses who look like Ally McBeel. It's a shame that a few loud voices drown out what most people are saying.

^^^ Hear, hear!

 

[Corylea]

Hi, Corylea, and welcome to the AH and this thread,

Thank you for the welcome; that's sweet of you! I've only just submitted my first story -- it hasn't been accepted yet -- so I wasn't sure whether I was allowed in this section of the forum. It seemed to be where the interesting people were, though, so I thought I'd try to sneak in.

although you are probably somebody's AV.

I'm sorry, but I'm new here, so I don't know what all the acronyms mean. What's an AV?

There are a few men who revel in the thrill of the chase, but these are the alpha males who are usually successful, both in this pursuit and in life in general.

Hmm. I'm not so sure. The sense I get, when being the pursuer, is that men are often conflicted about being the object of pursuit. On the one hand, it's always nice to be wanted, but on the other hand, if it's too easy, they don't value it.

As Liar said, it sometimes takes a verbal or physical 2 X 4.

Boy, have I got THAT tee-shirt. No, come to think of it, I think maybe I went whole hog and bought the sweatshirt.

 

[rgraham666]

An AV is that little picture that appears next to a person's posts. It's short for Avatar.

You get to add one to your profile once you have 100 posts.

Welcome to the AH.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

I don't know about the others but it took me about six months to settle on a single image. However, there are writers here with vastly greater talents than mine who see nothing wrong with changing AV's to fit their mood (or to go with their latest lingerie!). Sooooo . . . keep chatting along with the rest of us and while you're at it look over possible pix you want to use.

And as Rob said, Welcome!