How do you help someone get over being abused

[Cathleen]

Re: Finally....

Well I had the courage to actually tell my guy I love him. Still makes me shake to say the words, but in my heart I feel they are true and right. And I cannot deny the warmth, love and acceptance he is giving me. Thanks to my friends here I have found the courage to move forward. The path is enticing and scary at the same time, but for now it is my path.

Cate...I understand how you feel with your gremlins...the thoughts that won't go away. It does help to talk about them, for me the hardest part was sharing them with my guy. But he is always there, in words or with a hug when I am feeling low. Other times I just think the words " I will not beat myself up....I am better than that." I try to counter the negative with a positive thought about myself or my life after that phrase. It isn't a cure all but does seem to help me cut the gremlins off for the time being.

I am so happy for you WildRose...so glad you are open to the love and accepting it too..... I am doing the same and feeling the same with my guy too.... he is so wonderful... it almost seem unreal to me....

thanks for the help with those gremlins.... I'm try to just take their voice away.... sometimes I succeed.... yippy for me!!!

Thanks to everyone always

Cate

 

[Gil_T2]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Once again....

He was already coming to Lit and reading posts here. I thought about how I would feel if he came across my posts. And really I just sent him a link on impulse, if I had thought it through I might have backed out but it made sense at the time. And I am so glad I did.

It's pleasing to know things went smooth with you leading him here & it seems that he is of the right kind of man to love & cherish you & I hope that it all goes well for you.

 

[kikmosa]

I have to confess.... I'm finding myself slipping again. I'm fighting it hard but depression is slidding into my life again. I won't give in to it but it's so hard to fight it sometimes. I'm so tired. I'm soing to go back and read this thread from the beginning again. I'm hoping that it will help give me the strength to fight harder by seeing the support offered by so many and the sucess stories share by the lucky. Please pray for me.

 

[WildRose40DDD]

Prayers

Kikmosa,

You will be in my prayers! If there is anything I can do, even if it is just a shoulder to lean on, please contact me.

 

[Cathleen]

I have to confess.... I'm finding myself slipping again. I'm fighting it hard but depression is slidding into my life again. I won't give in to it but it's so hard to fight it sometimes. I'm so tired. I'm soing to go back and read this thread from the beginning again. I'm hoping that it will help give me the strength to fight harder by seeing the support offered by so many and the sucess stories share by the lucky. Please pray for me.

Kikmosa.... consider it done and will continue on and on, I'll add you to my prayer list........

(((((((((( Kikmosa))))))))) I can understand all too well the feelings of depression and the hole that drags us back..... please take extra care and reach out the best you can..... I offer my shoulder and my heart to you.......

 

[Noor]

Hang in there Kiki! I know its hard but don't let the bastards get you down.

Noor

 

[Don K Dyck]

I have to confess.... I'm finding myself slipping again. I'm fighting it hard but depression is slidding into my life again. I won't give in to it but it's so hard to fight it sometimes. I'm so tired. I'm soing to go back and read this thread from the beginning again. I'm hoping that it will help give me the strength to fight harder by seeing the support offered by so many and the sucess stories share by the lucky. Please pray for me.

Hi Kiki . . . have you missed out on your exercise routine? Try to organise to walk for an hour every day . . . 2 x 30 minutes if necessary . . . this will help burn up the biochemicals in your body that are creating the problem . . .

 

[Cathleen]

Hi Kiki . . . have you missed out on your exercise routine? Try to organise to walk for an hour every day . . . 2 x 30 minutes if necessary . . . this will help burn up the biochemicals in your body that are creating the problem . . .

excellent advice for me Don... thanks...I seem to forget that sometimes... a reminder is always nice..... you are always right there....

Cate

 

[kikmosa]

Thank you, all of you. I don't know why I'm feeling this way. Mark says that I'm starting to relax and grow stronger. He says that my mind feels that I'm ready to deal with some of the things I've buried and that's why this is happening. I don't know. I just wish it would go away. I've even started haveing a few nightmares again. Mark always comes in and wakes me up and holds me until I settle down again. He's a good friend.
Yes Don, I'm getting my excerise. I work 8 hours a day on my feet and moving constantly.
I'm hoping this passes soon. Until then just remember me in your prayers.
Kiki

 

[Noor]

kiki- mark may be right. often people with deal with buried things when they are in a safe space to process them.

 

[kikmosa]

kiki- mark may be right. often people with deal with buried things when they are in a safe space to process them.

Well, I am in a safe place. Mark's the first person that I've found in real life that I trust. I know that he'll never hurt me because he's been hurt too. He understands where I'm coming from. He helps me and I help him. His girlfriend is very understanding too. She's a good friend. This place and time have been good for me.

 

[Cathleen]

Well, I am in a safe place. Mark's the first person that I've found in real life that I trust. I know that he'll never hurt me because he's been hurt too. He understands where I'm coming from. He helps me and I help him. His girlfriend is very understanding too. She's a good friend. This place and time have been good for me.

have been thinking about you (((((( Kikmosa))))) prayers to you.... glad you posted....

 

[Don K Dyck]

Well, I am in a safe place. Mark's the first person that I've found in real life that I trust. I know that he'll never hurt me because he's been hurt too. He understands where I'm coming from. He helps me and I help him. His girlfriend is very understanding too. She's a good friend. This place and time have been good for me.

Hi Kiki . . . "recovery" is a long, generally slow process and every so often we sort of take time out to evaluate where we are at . . .

Now most people are not very good at evaluating "where they are at" compared to "where they have come from" because they are too close to the action . . . after all, it is their own life that they are evaluating . . . and they are taking an active part in creating whatever is happening, or not happening to them . . .

People tend to gather information about themselves from the reflections of others . . . if there are positive reflections then the person generally feels good about themselves and does not doubt that they are making progress . . .

However, if things get hard, or there is some sort of frustration, or some sort of discontent with life, then THAT is the time to fall back on the opinions of "good friends" who have helped you through difficult times in the past . . . they were there then asnd they will be there now . . . just ask them . . . talk over your problem(s) with a trusted old friend . . . frequently, their opinion at a distance will be more objective . . . and a better evaluation of your personal progress to serenity . . .

 

[Gil_T2]

I have to confess.... I'm finding myself slipping again. I'm fighting it hard but depression is slidding into my life again. I won't give in to it but it's so hard to fight it sometimes. I'm so tired. I'm soing to go back and read this thread from the beginning again. I'm hoping that it will help give me the strength to fight harder by seeing the support offered by so many and the sucess stories share by the lucky. Please pray for me.

Sweet lady what has triggered the depression for you ??? this being my concern more than you fighting them know the strength you have shown from very early on (I drew my strength from you too).

My email in box is always open to you.

 

[BrownEyes26]

((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) to Kiki
I hope that you start to feel better soon. I was depressed all of last term, and know that it can feel like it is never going to get any better. I feel like a million bucks now, and I know you will soon also.
BE26

 

[kikmosa]

Sweet lady what has triggered the depression for you ??? this being my concern more than you fighting them know the strength you have shown from very early on (I drew my strength from you too).

My email in box is always open to you.

I'm not sure what triggered it. It may just be this cold, gray weather. Or the nightmares that are coming oout again. I don't know. But I am fighting it. Going back and reading this thread helps. So much caring and support shown to so many people. Very inspiring.

 

[kikmosa]

((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) to Kiki
I hope that you start to feel better soon. I was depressed all of last term, and know that it can feel like it is never going to get any better. I feel like a million bucks now, and I know you will soon also.
BE26

I'm sure this will pass, I just wish it would hurry up and go, lol.

 

[Bandit58]

I'm not sure what triggered it. It may just be this cold, gray weather. Or the nightmares that are coming oout again. I don't know. But I am fighting it. Going back and reading this thread helps. So much caring and support shown to so many people. Very inspiring.

((((((((Kiki))))))))

I've gone back and read this thread several times......and I'm always amazed at how far I've come since I first posted. Even a phone conversation with Mr Butthead the other day, trying to lay another guilt trip on me about our daughter, didn't upset me like it would have done even a few months ago.

And Kiki, both Gil and I have really noticed how far YOU have come too You are much stronger than the lady who first posted her story here. Much love and hugs from us both, and hope that things will settle down again for you

 

[Cathleen]

I'm sure this will pass, I just wish it would hurry up and go, lol.

you are still in my prayers Kikmosa..... and shall be always....

 

[Ladybird]

Kiki my friend.... every now and then we all slide backwards a little, but never as far back as where we started from.

You're doing all the right things sweetheart, just hang in and fight it. Have a look at this site hon, you might find some things there that help you...

www.msia.org

Sending you love and light sweet lady, take care.

 

[Gil_T2]

I'm not sure what triggered it. It may just be this cold, gray weather. Or the nightmares that are coming oout again. I don't know. But I am fighting it. Going back and reading this thread helps. So much caring and support shown to so many people. Very inspiring.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{KIKI}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

 

[kikmosa]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{KIKI}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Mmmmmmmmmmm........... now that really helps.

 

[Cathleen]

Mmmmmmmmmmm........... now that really helps.

if it helps then

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Kikmosa }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
wishing you all the best and thinking of you!!

 

[BrownEyes26]

I'm sure this will pass, I just wish it would hurry up and go, lol.

Yeah I know what you mean, depression seems to take forever and a day to go away. Seeya!!
BE26

 

[kikmosa]

if it helps then

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Kikmosa }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
wishing you all the best and thinking of you!!

Thanks. Hugs from good friends are the best therapy you can get.