What goes too hard for you?

[madelinemasoch]

This is a weird question for me to see juxtaposed with your other questions about kinkiness because it sounds like you're imagining these static thresholds: stories with this much of this are boring, etc. Whereas for me it's all about the match between the story and the sex. Kinks that would be boring in one story might be just right for another.

No, don't get me wrong, I'm not implying this or that specific kink would be boring, or posing the question that way. It's about the amount/intensity of it, basically asking the inverse question of the others: what does not going hard enough mean?

 

[lovecraft68]

I mostly write to get stuff out of my head, but I think it's hard to cross lines when it comes to kinks. People have their kinks that I don't need to understand or approve of. And they will like it to varying degrees. There will always be someone appreciating the intensity you went for. For me, there is only one situation where it could cross a line: When it becomes fantastical to comply with LIt's rules. If you reach that point, maybe - MAYBE - you shouldn't write it at all.

Like, if you're into ballbusting, that's fine with me. But lizard people aren't real, so, if your story actually pops those testies, they're not growing back overnight for a repeat performance the following day.

Or if you're into BDSM, I'm not gonna tell you off. But understand that, if you fuck a woman with a pizza slicer, that's gonna do a lot more than just cause her pain.

Or, if you're into Cuckolding, I might worry for you, but you do you. However, if you hit the cuck with a taser and he passes out, that's because the electricity messed with his heart rhythm. So, if you then proceed to tie him to a chair instead of calling for an ambulance, you're gonna wait a long time for him to wake up so you can fuck his wife in front of him.

Or, if you're into breath play... good for you? But, everyone with a high school degree should know that unconscious people can't hold their breath. So, if you hold them underwater until they pass out, their lungs will be filled with water and they die.

This whole "suspension of disbelief" thing isn't for me. As far as I'm concerned, those fantasies go too far.

Good points on 'don't try this at home'

The problem with BDSM at times is it draws two types of the wrong people. The first isn't intentionally wrong, but they have serious issues and will let themselves be hurt for real, even disfigured. There's a term pain slut that some use to try to act like this is okay, and for some it is, but there's limits. The worst is the sadistic POS masking as a dom to be able to truly hurt people under the guess of D/S and the nightmare pairing is when one of those finds one of the ones who will allow themselves to be damaged for real.

Aside from that some games, even extreme, are okay, but only in a real relationship where there's trust and you really know that person's personal limits and stay within them. Choking for what I call "show" as in just the hand on the throat for the illusion of being rough, but not really squeezing vs those that do actually choke.

Personally I engage in knife play from time to time-and always at her request- and I'll slice off her clothes and put the tip on her, but never press and she knows to never move. This is something I wouldn't recommend unless you can really handle a knife and again 100% trust and being able to stay in the rules.

 

[AchtungNight]

Good points on 'don't try this at home'

The problem with BDSM at times is it draws two types of the wrong people. The first isn't intentionally wrong, but they have serious issues and will let themselves be hurt for real, even disfigured. There's a term pain slut that some use to try to act like this is okay, and for some it is, but there's limits. The worst is the sadistic POS masking as a dom to be able to truly hurt people under the guess of D/S and the nightmare pairing is when one of those finds one of the ones who will allow themselves to be damaged for real.

Aside from that some games, even extreme, are okay, but only in a real relationship where there's trust and you really know that person's personal limits and stay within them. Choking for what I call "show" as in just the hand on the throat for the illusion of being rough, but not really squeezing vs those that do actually choke.

Personally I engage in knife play from time to time-and always at her request- and I'll slice off her clothes and put the tip on her, but never press and she knows to never move. This is something I wouldn't recommend unless you can really handle a knife and again 100% trust and being able to stay in the rules.

Good plan. I’d be the same way with a woman into BDSM. But I’m more into romance so I doubt it’d work out with me and such a kink anyway.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

The problem with BDSM at times is it draws two types of the wrong people. The first isn't intentionally wrong, but they have serious issues and will let themselves be hurt for real, even disfigured. There's a term pain slut that some use to try to act like this is okay, and for some it is, but there's limits. The worst is the sadistic POS masking as a dom to be able to truly hurt people under the guess of D/S and the nightmare pairing is when one of those finds one of the ones who will allow themselves to be damaged for real.

Yeah. Probably even worse than a simple pain slut getting together with an abuser, is when someone who wants to submit to someone else's will gets together with someone who wants to be totally in control and doesn't have the others's best interests at heart.

I'll read pretty much any kink if it's clear why the people are doing it and it's consistent with their characterisation thus far. But if Mr and Mrs Mainstream have just played with a little light spanking, and suddenly are rigging up suspension piercings at home, and mixing in anything unhygienic, you've lost me.

Some woman decides to go back to the home of a guy she's just met at a bar? You're going to have to work to persuade me that's at all likely - the kink is probably the easy bit.

 

[lovecraft68]

Yeah. Probably even worse than a simple pain slut getting together with an abuser, is when someone who wants to submit to someone else's will gets together with someone who wants to be totally in control and doesn't have the others's best interests at heart.

I'll read pretty much any kink if it's clear why the people are doing it and it's consistent with their characterisation thus far. But if Mr and Mrs Mainstream have just played with a little light spanking, and suddenly are rigging up suspension piercings at home, and mixing in anything unhygienic, you've lost me.

Some woman decides to go back to the home of a guy she's just met at a bar? You're going to have to work to persuade me that's at all likely - the kink is probably the easy bit.

Right, in real life the idea of going home with a stranger and saying tie me up, I trust you is....wrong.

TPE relationships have always given me a bad vibe, I just can't see it being healthy and I'm not trying to kink shame, I'm looking at it from a simple angle of being human.

 

[DarkCosmos]

So, to just kinda hammer down on a few key points other posters have already mentioned, for me it comes down to two things when writing any form of erotica. Believability and palatability.

Is your story believable? By that, I mean, do you have some explanation for why a person could, as one poster mentioned, get fucked by a pizza wheel and not come out with severe internal lacerations and or death via blood loss? No? Then maybe you shouldn't incorporate that in your writing. Because if you try to force a fetish on a reader, no matter how tame or intense, without offering some sort of logical or reasonable explanation as to why this action can occur in this particular kind of story, then you've just lost that reader.

But going hand in hand with that is palatability. Let's say you write a very realistic depiction of someone getting fucked by a pizza wheel. Now you have to ask yourself the question "who exactly is going to want to read this?" If it's something you're making just to get thoughts out of your head as someone else mentioned, that's one thing. But if it's something you actually want other people to read, there has to be some consideration for the reader as well. At least, I believe so.

Personally, I believe there's always a healthy balance to be found somewhere between believability and fantasy. Even in much more extreme writings like noncon. If you go into a writing with honest intentions and make it clear upfront that your goal is not to traumatize anyone or glorify the subject material, then most readers I've dealt with will be more than willing to accept whatever zany story you put in front of them. Provided, of course, you can still make it compelling and relatable, which is where the fun challenge lies, in my opinion.

TLDR: nobody realistically enjoys or can handle being fucked by a pizza wheel.

 

[AG31]

I think the key is internal integrity. I don't think there is a "too hard," if it supports the intention and tone of your story. It is, after all, fiction. Check out a classic like Georges Bataille's works. Certainly not my cup of tea, but acknowedged as being a powerful writer.

 

[madelinemasoch]

I think the key is internal integrity. I don't think there is a "too hard," if it supports the intention and tone of your story. It is, after all, fiction. Check out a classic like Georges Bataille's works. Certainly not my cup of tea, but acknowedged as being a powerful writer.

I love Bataille, actually.

 

[gunhilltrain]

My limit so far is a giant squid penetrating one FMCs anus with a tentacle, traversing her entire digestive tract, emerging from her mouth, entering the second FMC’s mouth, traversing her digestive tract the other way, emerging from her anus and penetrating the first FMC’s pussy.

To be clear, the squid is a female, lesbian, shape-shifting alien and the pinnacle of alien sex is “filling the tubes” of humans.

Kinky enough for you?

If not, it also features equine and ogre sex. Regular lesbian sex. Pregnant school girl sex. Caning. Menstruation. And a few other things.

My therapist is a busy lady.

And the main 30k word story ends with a slice of historical miscegenation / Roe vs Wade-inspired political polemic.

That’s Caputpedes for you.

Em

PS the squid also “magically” cleans and sterilizes both girls’ guts prior to the traversing. Safe sex boys and girls safe sex.

PPS the above was all consensual and everyone came.

Shape-shifting alien squid who practice safe sex. Maybe I've asked this before, but what was your original inspiration for that interest? Some of these things are not easy to explain. I could try to explain my own kinks/interests (maybe), although those are not as numerous as some other people's.

As for the OP: I don't worry too much about being boring; I let the readers decide on that! I do have trouble writing about relationship break-ups, although those are a fact of life in the age of we live in. Those events are somewhat downbeat, but sometimes that's the only conclusion that makes sense. I also have trouble with "hook-up" culture. Now that I'm finally writing about two female protagonists living in the 21st Century, they, perhaps being a minority, are adamantly against hook-ups.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Shape-shifting alien squid who practice safe sex. Maybe I've asked this before, but what was your original inspiration for that interest? Some of these things are not easy to explain. I could try to explain my own kinks/interests (maybe), although those are not as numerous as some other people's.

It wasn’t me!!!

They made me!!!

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/which-story-next.1583516/

I’d never seen any tentacle porn before my “research” for this story.

Em

 

[gunhilltrain]

It wasn’t me!!!

They made me!!!

https://forum.literotica.com/threads/which-story-next.1583516/

I’d never seen any tentacle porn before my “research” for this story.

Em

Yes, I see that somebody suggested it (don't make me spell his name!), but yet it - appealed to you somehow.

It can be difficult to explain. I can write about things, certain practices in stories, but I am reluctant to discuss them in forum posts even though I do have insights. I'm not sure why that is so - other authors have fewer problems with it. Hey, another five years on Lit, and I'll be completely cured of my hang-ups!

 

[EmilyMiller]

Yes, I see that somebody suggested it (don't make me spell his name!), but yet it - appealed to you somehow.

I was kinda bereft at first. Then I had these two ideas:

1. Make the tentacle sex consensual (unlike all other tentacle sex which is pretty rapey)
2. Come up with a hard sci-fi justification for the tentacle monster

That’s what got me excited, and led to what is still my second highest rated story.

It can be difficult to explain. I can write about things, certain practices in stories, but I am reluctant to discuss them in forum posts even though I do have insights. I'm not sure why that is so - other authors have fewer problems with it. Hey, another five years on Lit, and I'll be completely cured of my hang-ups!

FWIW I’ve got burnt via being too willing to discuss kinks - not on AH so much, but on Lit.

Em

 

[gunhilltrain]

FWIW I’ve got burnt via being too willing to discuss kinks - not on AH so much, but on Lit.

Em

Okay, you would know what the reaction to your comments was. It seems like plenty of people here talk about them, even enjoy it. I think in my case it's self-censorship; I worry about getting burnt, but it seems to have rarely actually happened. Maybe it did happen once on the BSDM board, but they seem like a fairly tight-knit group with their own opinions. There seems to be a lot of uninhibited wildness elsewhere.

 

[CyranoJ]

When it comes to writing kink, where are the lines between too far and not enough, as you have drawn them? Or even if you don't write kink, what do you think goes too hard? Do you ever worry you're being boring? (Consent is assumed, obviously r*pe is too far. I know someone will nitpick this and change the subject anyway, but whatever).

Whatever category I'm writing in (and I do write in NC/R, full disclosure), I balk at:

- Bestiality
- Vore
- Serious violence or mutilation
- Prolapsed buttholes (not sexy)
- Piss-play or scatology
- Any form of "interracial" that reifies bestializing racist tropes about Black males
- Forms of NC/R that are purely about misogynistic power fantasy and in which the women are not actual characters
- Anything that outright promotes fascism
- The Existential Koala from Star Trek: Lower Decks (this hasn't come up yet, but if it does, I will abstain)
- Spontaneous combustion (never heard of this being a kink but you really never can know)
- Accidental levitation (see above)
- Unplanned interdimensional travel or time-hopping
- Metamorphosis (into giant insect, tentacle monster or hyper-intelligent root vegetable forms)
- The summoning of god-like intergalactic sex tourists with enormous clusters of plantains and mangoes for private parts

Apart from that, it's all Gucci.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Whatever category I'm writing in (and I do write in NC/R, full disclosure), I balk at:

- Bestiality
- Vore
- Serious violence or mutilation
- Prolapsed buttholes (not sexy)
- Piss-play or scatology
- Any form of "interracial" that reifies bestializing racist tropes about Black males
- Forms of NC/R that are purely about misogynistic power fantasy and in which the women are not actual characters
- Anything that outright promotes fascism
- The Existential Koala from Star Trek: Lower Decks (this hasn't come up yet, but if it does, I will abstain)
- Spontaneous combustion (never heard of this being a kink but you really never can know)
- Accidental levitation (see above)
- Unplanned interdimensional travel or time-hopping
- Metamorphosis (into giant insect, tentacle monster or hyper-intelligent root vegetable forms)
- The summoning of god-like intergalactic sex tourists with enormous clusters of plantains and mangoes for private parts

Apart from that, it's all Gucci.

The last six of those would seem extremely rare for erotic writing, although I may have missed something. Maybe you're being tongue-in-cheek with the last one, the plantains and mangoes? Maybe you're being tongue-in-cheek with all six? I don't see anything wrong with unplanned inter-dimensional travel or time-hopping per se, if someone wanted to use it (although I wouldn't know what to do with it).

The most well-known metamorphosis, the one written by Kafka, is not at all erotic. He did do a good job for sheer weirdness. I believe spontaneous combustion has been debunked by somebody, but I don't have a link here. That's another one that seems very unpromising for erotica, although maybe someone has tried it.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Since you also mentioned vore, here is one article I found.

https://nationalpost.com/news/canad...case-for-toronto-psychiatric-hospital-doctors

 

[CyranoJ]

The last six of those would seem extremely rare for erotic writing, although I may have missed something. Maybe you're being tongue-in-cheek with the last one, the plantains and mangoes? Maybe you're being tongue-in-cheek with all six?

It is, indeed, just possible that the last half-dozen items on that list are tongue-in-cheek. Well-spotted.

 

[AG31]

FWIW I’ve got burnt via being too willing to discuss kinks - not on AH so much, but on Lit.

Em

Newbie in these forums. Where does one "discuss" on Lit? And how does one get "burnt?" Just negative replies?

 

[gunhilltrain]

Newbie in these forums. Where does one "discuss" on Lit? And how does one get "burnt?" Just negative replies?

There's a whole forum "Fetish and Sexuality Central."

https://forum.literotica.com/forums/fetish-sexuality-central.58/

I haven't looked too deeply into that, but I suspect it is better than Author's Hangout for detailed examinations of these issues. There is also a BDSM board, since that is so common it almost isn't a fetish (well, I guess it's a matter of degree and it's a rather wide topic).

https://forum.literotica.com/forums/bdsm-talk.26/

 

[AchtungNight]

I have explored the Fetish/Sexuality Central board a bit, there are some interesting discussions there. No deep connections, however, at least on my part.

I don’t think I will ever get into tentacle porn. Then again, my Pathfinder story does feature a character with a naughty prehensile tail. This was inspired by a previous site I was on where a lot of writers were uncomfortable with such things. I always thought it was no big deal.

BDSM has always been a troublesome topic for me. Tying people down in sex borders on abuse in my opinion and that’s uncomfortable. Then again some people are obviously into that kind of thing as a consensual role play. Including, it turned out, the central characters of my God of War story. Not sure if I’ll broaden my horizons further in that direction, but it was a good experience.

 

[RainyDayPen]

I was gonna say something pretty tame by comparison to what I've read on here. Now I just feel like I'll go write that story I thought went too far until I read Emily's tentacle thing.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I was gonna say something pretty tame by comparison to what I've read on here. Now I just feel like I'll go write that story I thought went too far until I read Emily's tentacle thing.

Emily’s tentacle thing is actually a kinda sweet love story. It’s almost Jane Austenesque - if Jane wrote about anal depth training that is (which I like to think was most likely one of her hobbies).

It has a heart warming HEA, one that takes only 62k words to get to. That’s after the FMC has reprogrammed the consciousness of an entire species that is. How that for mind control?

Em

 

[Codoc24]

Has anyone seen the 1996 movie called "Crash?" It's been a long time since I've seen it so I don't remember a lot but I think that's a situation of taking it too far. People in the movie get turned on by car crashes and being in car crashes.

 

[SimonDoom]

Has anyone seen the 1996 movie called "Crash?" It's been a long time since I've seen it so I don't remember a lot but I think that's a situation of taking it too far. People in the movie get turned on by car crashes and being in car crashes.

I saw it, and I recently read the novel on which it was based.

I would agree that it "went too far" in the sense that the subject matter was so crazy and repellant that it was impossible to find it really erotic. But I could appreciate it on a removed level, as a creative story about what other people, not me, find erotic.

 

[ChloeTzang]

When it comes to writing kink, where are the lines between too far and not enough, as you have drawn them? Or even if you don't write kink, what do you think goes too hard? Do you ever worry you're being boring? (Consent is assumed, obviously r*pe is too far. I know someone will nitpick this and change the subject anyway, but whatever).

LoL. I don't really set limits. I write the story and it goes where it goes. The limits for me are (1) what I'm interested in writing, and (2) what Literotica allows. And no, I don't consider r*pe too far, depending on the story and the context but I stay away from that and from <18 based on Literotica's guidelines.