Pardon my Boner

[hotwords229_A]

I remember in 6th grade Sex Ed class the guy in the video talked about erections and not being embarrassed about them. He said we all feel like everyone is looking at them, but asked. "When was the last time you noticed another guy's boner?" (I'm paraphrasing )

So this thread is all about erections, hard-ons and boners.
Tell us your stories.

Guys: tell us about embarrassing boners you've experienced.

Ladies: tell us when/if you've noticed an erection with a non-partner.

Have you ever hugged a platonic partner and noticed a slight protrusion?
Do you look for them?
Have you ever tried to give a helpless guy a Throbber just for fun?
What was the most uncomfortable situation where you've popped a Woody?
etc.

 

[SophieUK]

This is going to be amusing (as long as it stays the right side of Lit rules)... can’t think here are many of us that haven’t experienced a surprising (unwelcome?) boner at some point... and I know I’m not the only girl that has delighted in causing said discomfort at inopportune moments

 

[hotwords229_A]

This is going to be amusing (as long as it stays the right side of Lit rules)... can’t think here are many of us that haven’t experienced a surprising (unwelcome?) boner at some point... and I know I’m not the only girl that has delighted in causing said discomfort at inopportune moments

Agreed, I'm hoping it stays amusing.

As for delighting in our discomfort that's diabolical (and awesome)

 

[MrMikelobe1952]

My boner is huge and always hard. I'm only embarrassed when it knocks things off the table. Clumsy boner.

Just because I get a boner every time I see you does not mean its "your" boner.

I will try to get in the spirit of the question.
It was in Freshman year of High School. So, can I tell the story without violating Lit rules?

 

[Deleted member 1306910]

One of the only benefits of being a fat dude is I can sorta pretend I don't have one. Because for one, nobody is gonna be looking.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Just because I get a boner every time I see you does not mean its "your" boner.

I will try to get in the spirit of the question.
It was in Freshman year of High School. So, can I tell the story without violating Lit rules?

Maybe I shouldn't have mentioned 6th grade. We don't need ages or time periods, just the experiences. That way we can stay within the rules. I don't know about anyone else, but my recent uncomfortable moment was Friday so . . .

 

[Apisto42]

Embarrassing boner stories? Hm, that pretty much sums up junior high school for me.

The title of my forth-coming memoir:

My Misadventures in Junior High
or: Why is this always hard?

 

[newbie5063]

Just because I get a boner every time I see you does not mean its "your" boner.

I will try to get in the spirit of the question.
It was in Freshman year of High School. So, can I tell the story without violating Lit rules?

Mr Mike,
Just had to comment on the lyrics. Great song! I have always thought this would be good as my epitaph.

 

[DarkSimian]

So...

Sunday, driving to the gas station, Kat is on the phone telling me about a very erotic dream she had the night before. Let's just say I had to wait a few minutes before I got out of the car....and the fact that she knew what effect she had on me

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

I gave an unsuspecting fellow a throbber last week.

He underestimated my insidious powers of erotic imagery.

Always a good time.

 

[ZanzibarWest]

I went hot tubbing with a nice lady and we both agreed to go nude. I'm the first nude and am watching her doff her clothing and.....yeah, I'm raging. And she turns around to look and stares at my boner for about five seconds before starting a new line of conversation.

Embarrassing? Very! It was one of those nice, hard, glistening ones so she knew what I was thinking.

Did it get me laid? Yes it did. God, I miss her.

 

[hotwords229_A]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/dacc86205e885a0272fbb40433f8004b/tumblr_ppnlbnL4ds1wyq49so1_400.gif

This pretty much sums it up.

 

[SophieUK]

So I’ll wade in with a story.. nothing out of the ordinary given the circumstances but it still brings a smile to my face..

The scene is in Finland where I am on a work placement with my (male) colleagues. It is the weekend, and we have been invited to party at a summer house down by the sea. There is a demarcation between the men (who share a sauna) and the women who sit drinking in the glorious evening sun.

The door of the sauna flies open as the men exit, nude, to run and jump into the cool sea under the watchful eyes of the cheering women. This is the first my colleagues realise their dilemma, made worse by the presence of their young female coworker (me). Their hesitance is punished as erstwhile flaccid members rise to attention when they see my gaze, before they scramble, erect penises bobbing comically , to the safety of the sea.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I went hot tubbing with a nice lady and we both agreed to go nude. I'm the first nude and am watching her doff her clothing and.....yeah, I'm raging. And she turns around to look and stares at my boner for about five seconds before starting a new line of conversation.

Embarrassing? Very! It was one of those nice, hard, glistening ones so she knew what I was thinking.

Did it get me laid? Yes it did. God, I miss her.

So I’ll wade in with a story.. nothing out of the ordinary given the circumstances but it still brings a smile to my face..

The scene is in Finland where I am on a work placement with my (male) colleagues. It is the weekend, and we have been invited to party at a summer house down by the sea. There is a demarcation between the men (who share a sauna) and the women who sit drinking in the glorious evening sun.

The door of the sauna flies open as the men exit, nude, to run and jump into the cool sea under the watchful eyes of the cheering women. This is the first my colleagues realise their dilemma, made worse by the presence of their young female coworker (me). Their hesitance is punished as erstwhile flaccid members rise to attention when they see my gaze, before they scramble, erect penises bobbing comically , to the safety of the sea.

Both of these stories seem like appropriate boners to me. Once a guy is naked all bets are off. In fact, we usually want at least a semi for a good presentation.

Now I'm wondering if, as a woman, when you look at a naked guy and he doesn't get an erection is that an insult?

Jack Nicholson used to tell his female costars before shooting a love scene, "I apologize if I get an erection and I apologize if I don't"

 

[SophieUK]

Both of these stories seem like appropriate boners to me. Once a guy is naked all bets are off. In fact, we usually want at least a semi for a good presentation.

Now I'm wondering if, as a woman, when you look at a naked guy and he doesn't get an erection is that an insult?

Jack Nicholson used to tell his female costars before shooting a love scene, "I apologize if I get an erection and I apologize if I don't"

I know what you mean but in the context they felt inappropriate: none of the Finnish guys were hard and the poor boys only got excited once the attention was on them and the boners were uncontrolled/unwelcome (to them! us girls loved it)

It’s not an insult though, either way, it just ‘is what it is’, it’s all about context..
Love Jack Nicholson

 

[hotwords229_A]

I know what you mean but in the context they felt inappropriate: none of the Finnish guys were hard and the poor boys only got excited once the attention was on them and the boners were uncontrolled/unwelcome (to them! us girls loved it)

It’s not an insult though, either way, it just ‘is what it is’, it’s all about context..
Love Jack Nicholson

I love your story by the way. Being caught naked and then getting (uncontrollably) hard because of it fits a certain proclivity of mine

 

[BongoGal]

In college, I watched the movie The Shining with a bunch of friends in a dorm room. There is a scene in which a beautiful nude woman gets out of a bathtub and approaches Jack Nicholson's character. I noticed that a guy sitting sort of at an angle in front of me started slowly moving his arm to hide the erection that I could see was quickly growing in his shorts. I guess he didn't want to attract attention by too suddenly covering up. Everyone else was staring at the screen, so they didn't notice. Troublemaker that I am, I bent forward and whispered ever so quietly in his ear, "I saw that." He didn't even turn to look at me. He sat stock still and blushed a bright pink.

 

[SophieUK]

In college, I watched the movie The Shining with a bunch of friends in a dorm room. There is a scene in which a beautiful nude woman gets out of a bathtub and approaches Jack Nicholson's character. I noticed that a guy sitting sort of at an angle in front of me started slowly moving his arm to hide the erection that I could see was quickly growing in his shorts. I guess he didn't want to attract attention by too suddenly covering up. Everyone else was staring at the screen, so they didn't notice. Troublemaker that I am, I bent forward and whispered ever so quietly in his ear, "I saw that." He didn't even turn to look at me. He sat stock still and blushed a bright pink.

You are sooooo mean (but I like you

 

[hotwords229_A]

In college, I watched the movie The Shining with a bunch of friends in a dorm room. There is a scene in which a beautiful nude woman gets out of a bathtub and approaches Jack Nicholson's character. I noticed that a guy sitting sort of at an angle in front of me started slowly moving his arm to hide the erection that I could see was quickly growing in his shorts. I guess he didn't want to attract attention by too suddenly covering up. Everyone else was staring at the screen, so they didn't notice. Troublemaker that I am, I bent forward and whispered ever so quietly in his ear, "I saw that." He didn't even turn to look at me. He sat stock still and blushed a bright pink.

I bet when she turned into the old cackling witch woman his boner deflated pretty quick--unless he was into that!

You are sooooo mean (but I like you

I agree, teasing is hot

 

[MrMikelobe1952]

In college, I watched the movie The Shining with a bunch of friends in a dorm room. There is a scene in which a beautiful nude woman gets out of a bathtub and approaches Jack Nicholson's character. I noticed that a guy sitting sort of at an angle in front of me started slowly moving his arm to hide the erection that I could see was quickly growing in his shorts. I guess he didn't want to attract attention by too suddenly covering up. Everyone else was staring at the screen, so they didn't notice. Troublemaker that I am, I bent forward and whispered ever so quietly in his ear, "I saw that." He didn't even turn to look at me. He sat stock still and blushed a bright pink.

I'm sure that, if it had been me, I would have reacted the same way.
I'd like to think that I would have been bold enough to whisper back, "And did you like what you saw?'
But I'm sure I would not have been that confident in college.
A few years later, maybe

 

[Crownvic]

My boner is huge and always hard. I'm only embarrassed when it knocks things off the table. Clumsy boner.

You should be more careful with your boner...lol

 

[SophieUK]

Another one to tickle you:
As I’ve shared on here before, I had an amusing exchange one Xmas party when dancing with a (much) younger man. I was 8 months gone at the time but still dressed up the 9s in a fabulous skin tight red dress (I still have it!).. I though I looked fab. Anyway, hubby wasn’t dancing so I had a few dances one my way and this guy...we’re dancing close, closer than I’d intended, and the little f*cker got a right boner on! I could feel it pressing into me! I was quite pleasant about it but he loooed quite crestfallen when I pulled away. I pointed to my bump, in case it wasn’t obvious, and I remember him saying ‘I know’!!

 

[BongoGal]

I'm sure that, if it had been me, I would have reacted the same way.
I'd like to think that I would have been bold enough to whisper back, "And did you like what you saw?'
But I'm sure I would not have been that confident in college.
A few years later, maybe

If he had tried to flirt with me at that point, I would have teased him somehow, and not in a flirty way.

 

[Crownvic]

Another one to tickle you:
As I’ve shared on here before, I had an amusing exchange one Xmas party when dancing with a (much) younger man. I was 8 months gone at the time but still dressed up the 9s in a fabulous skin tight red dress (I still have it!).. I though I looked fab. Anyway, hubby wasn’t dancing so I had a few dances one my way and this guy...we’re dancing close, closer than I’d intended, and the little f*cker got a right boner on! I could feel it pressing into me! I was quite pleasant about it but he loooed quite crestfallen when I pulled away. I pointed to my bump, in case it wasn’t obvious, and I remember him saying ‘I know’!!

Sophie...you are quite the tease...that’s why we love you...

 

[islandguy]

In college, I watched the movie The Shining with a bunch of friends in a dorm room. There is a scene in which a beautiful nude woman gets out of a bathtub and approaches Jack Nicholson's character. I noticed that a guy sitting sort of at an angle in front of me started slowly moving his arm to hide the erection that I could see was quickly growing in his shorts. I guess he didn't want to attract attention by too suddenly covering up. Everyone else was staring at the screen, so they didn't notice. Troublemaker that I am, I bent forward and whispered ever so quietly in his ear, "I saw that." He didn't even turn to look at me. He sat stock still and blushed a bright pink.

That was SO HOT of you...