Pardon my Boner

[hotwords229_A]

My boner is huge and always hard. I'm only embarrassed when it knocks things off the table. Clumsy boner.

I'm always impressed when mine knocks stuff off the table.

 

[hotwords229_A]

So the other week I was walking down the hallway at work and a certain "rub" began to happen as I was walking, which seems to always lead to an unsummoned erection. As I was walking down the stairs a woman I work with was at the bottom of the stairs and talking to me. We were making eye contact, but at a certain point I'm pretty sure her eyes darted down to my crotch.
We both acted like everything was normal--I'm not sure if she noticed or not. I feel like she did. And no, I didn't want her to notice.

So the question is: how often do you notice a random guy's erection?

I've only noticed one in my entire life and it was impossible to miss. But I also don't know how much time I spend looking at guy's crotches (I assume it's not much).

 

[Endless_Night]

< So the question is: how often do you notice a random guy's erection? >

I am going to have to go with…never.

Seriously. I am pretty much oblivious to…the state of random guys' arousal. Not surprising since I don't even notice when I'm being flirted at. *shrug*

I did, however, once get caught staring, errr, below the waist in the elevator once.

It's not what you think!

He was wearing like, light pink pants with tiny red lobsters (or some such) patterned all over. Similar to the stuff Pmann used to post. They were…a little labbergasting. I simply could not tear my gaze away. Awkward.

 

[blondebabydoll]

I absolutely love making my boyfriends hard in public. I just love teasing and it's so fun watching them try to hide it or make it go down. It such a thrill for me.

 

[Crownvic]

I absolutely love making my boyfriends hard in public. I just love teasing and it's so fun watching them try to hide it or make it go down. It such a thrill for me.

My kind of girl.....

 

[ZanzibarWest]

I absolutely love making my boyfriends hard in public. I just love teasing and it's so fun watching them try to hide it or make it go down. It such a thrill for me.

I had a girlfriend like that once. For her it was getting me hard in a variety of situations, especially when we were doing something walking around naked in this fantastic old house she was housesitting.

Great times. I still blush when I think of running past a bay window wearing nothing but a rock-solid erection to her giggles. *sigh*

 

[hotwords229_A]

I did, however, once get caught staring, errr, below the waist in the elevator once.

It's not what you think!

He was wearing like, light pink pants with tiny red lobsters (or some such) patterned all over. Similar to the stuff Pmann used to post. They were…a little labbergasting. I simply could not tear my gaze away. Awkward.

But were they soft shell lobsters or hard shell?

I absolutely love making my boyfriends hard in public. I just love teasing and it's so fun watching them try to hide it or make it go down. It such a thrill for me.

You are fun!

 

[MrMikelobe1952]

If he had tried to flirt with me at that point, I would have teased him somehow, and not in a flirty way.

So, the conversation goes, in effect
"I've been looking at your boner."
"Do you like it?"
Ok, tease in a non-flirty way. Demonstrate how you would do it.

 

[Peppadance]

I absolutely love making my boyfriends hard in public. I just love teasing and it's so fun watching them try to hide it or make it go down. It such a thrill for me.

I love this when it happens, no problem if people notice!

 

[Crownvic]

I love this when it happens, no problem if people notice!

Leaving the restaurant. ...with a huge wet spot showing...she loves it...

 

[default24]

So back in high school (both 18) we were on a school trip in Orlando. There was this girl who wanted to hang out together on the trip. I had heard from a friend of her's days before that she was 'excited' about the trip. So we rode on the airplane together, sat next to each other on the bus to the hotel, etc. So we have like an hour and a half free time and the entire class went to the pool at the hotel (I should mention that there's like 200 of us)
So down in the pool, there's just carnage everywhere but we sneak off to a corner and she starts flirting aggressively. She had auburn hair and was wearing a bright pink string bikini. I remember that she would grab my hands and then lift herself out of the pool and then pull close to me and glide down my body. This obviously did things to me. Like I thought I was going to damage something I was so hard
So after some more splashing around it's nearing time to head back to our rooms and I'm just not leaving the pool. I remember her asking "aren't you coming?"
And I had to give some super lame response about not quite being done swimming or something. Cringe

 

[hotwords229_A]

So back in high school (both 18) we were on a school trip in Orlando. There was this girl who wanted to hang out together on the trip. I had heard from a friend of her's days before that she was 'excited' about the trip. So we rode on the airplane together, sat next to each other on the bus to the hotel, etc. So we have like an hour and a half free time and the entire class went to the pool at the hotel (I should mention that there's like 200 of us)
So down in the pool, there's just carnage everywhere but we sneak off to a corner and she starts flirting aggressively. She had auburn hair and was wearing a bright pink string bikini. I remember that she would grab my hands and then lift herself out of the pool and then pull close to me and glide down my body. This obviously did things to me. Like I thought I was going to damage something I was so hard
So after some more splashing around it's nearing time to head back to our rooms and I'm just not leaving the pool. I remember her asking "aren't you coming?"
And I had to give some super lame response about not quite being done swimming or something. Cringe

I think the proper response was "No, I'm not coming, you got out of the pool too soon!"

I had a similar experience (in my early twenties) of my girlfriend giving me a boner in the pool. When it was time to get out, she promised to provide me "cover" by walking closely in front of me (It was late at night, our other friends were there, but most of them were in the hot tub) of course, once we were out in the open she ran away from me and screamed to draw everyone's attention to us/me!

She was awesome.

 

[AficionadoAngel]

No one was home one day at the parents house and I wanted a dip in the pool, but only had an old bikini that was too small and my naughty bits kept slipping out. No big deal with no one around, but my brother showed up with some friends and they joined me at the pool. One of them was talking to me from the pool while I was sitting on a deck chair with my legs casually open and he got a good view of pubic hair and more. When the others weren’t looking he got out of the pool with a massive erection. He acted casual, but I’m pretty sure he wanted me to see that.

 

[Crownvic]

Another one to tickle you:
As I’ve shared on here before, I had an amusing exchange one Xmas party when dancing with a (much) younger man. I was 8 months gone at the time but still dressed up the 9s in a fabulous skin tight red dress (I still have it!).. I though I looked fab. Anyway, hubby wasn’t dancing so I had a few dances one my way and this guy...we’re dancing close, closer than I’d intended, and the little f*cker got a right boner on! I could feel it pressing into me! I was quite pleasant about it but he loooed quite crestfallen when I pulled away. I pointed to my bump, in case it wasn’t obvious, and I remember him saying ‘I know’!!

I would not have pulled away...I have been pushing and grinding it in...

 

[hotwords229_A]

. . . When the others weren’t looking he got out of the pool with a massive erection. He acted casual, but I’m pretty sure he wanted me to see that.

I'm pretty sure he did too

I would not have pulled away...I have been pushing and grinding it in...

Man, that's a real dick move--get it?

 

[neakman]

I absolutely love making my boyfriends hard in public. I just love teasing and it's so fun watching them try to hide it or make it go down. It such a thrill for me.

im sure your boyfriends like making your boner hard as well.

 

[kurrginatorX]

Got a hard-on at a restaurant just as it was time to leave and couldn't leave until it went down 30 minutes later.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Got a hard-on at a restaurant just as it was time to leave and couldn't leave until it went down 30 minutes later.

HA! I forgot all about this thread!

Yeah, that's the worst because the more you try to get it to go down the harder it gets. It's why I can't wear sweatpants anywhere--EVER!

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

So getting a random boner when you're young is one thing getting one at sixty is quite another.

I offered to beta read a story by a fellow member. She sent it to me and I put it on my phone to read at lunch. I pulled it out during a meeting that should have been an email. It was pretty hot. So I put it away. I hot busy, worked through lunch and forgot about it until 2pm. I opened it and read it. Initially, I made notes. Pretty soon I was hooked. By the time the story was done, I was stiff as a brick and unable to stand up for half an hour.

Great story: https://www.literotica.com/s/teasing-8

 

[hotwords229_A]

So getting a random toner when you're young is one thing getting one at sixty is quite another.

I offered to beta read a story by a fellow member. She sent it to me and I put it on my phone to read at lunch. I pulled it out during a meeting that should have been an email. It was pretty hot. So I put it away. I hot busy, worked through lunch and forgot about it until 2pm. I opened it and read it. Initially, I made notes. Pretty soon I was hooked. By the time the story was done, I was stiff as a brick and unable to stand up for half an hour.

Great story: https://www.literotica.com/s/teasing-8

Work boners are the worst--you can't do anything about them, they are totally distracting, they make you feel like you stand out like a sore thumb (in this case literally) and if you wear dress pants then you are totally screwed. And yet, I love every one of them like they are my own child

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

So getting a random boner when you're young is one thing getting one at sixty is quite another.

I offered to beta read a story by a fellow member. She sent it to me and I put it on my phone to read at lunch. I pulled it out during a meeting that should have been an email. It was pretty hot. So I put it away. I hot busy, worked through lunch and forgot about it until 2pm. I opened it and read it. Initially, I made notes. Pretty soon I was hooked. By the time the story was done, I was stiff as a brick and unable to stand up for half an hour.

Great story: https://www.literotica.com/s/teasing-8

Work boners are the worst--you can't do anything about them, they are totally distracting, they make you feel like you stand out like a sore thumb (in this case literally) and if you wear dress pants then you are totally screwed. And yet, I love every one of them like they are my own child

The other problem is that I am rapidly reaching the age where a basic rule is "never waste a hard-on".

 

[Lord Pmann]

This thread is amazing. I love it.

 

[Lord Pmann]

My most notorious boner was when I was like 16. I have told this story before, but it’s pretty good. So I’ll repeat it.

Pteen was working in the garage and, being 16, my penis was perpetually hard. I noticed a sexy shop vac over in the corner. So, short story long, I stuck my dick in that vacuum. I imagined it had on some lingerie. Then, I came pretty quickly. It was a fine upgrade from my hand.

I fucked that vacuum all summer.

Eventually, we grew apart. Wanted different things. Sometimes I still think of her round bottom, her wheels, her long hose and loud squeal. I wonder what would happen if things had been different. Sure, I see other vacuums now. But you never forget your first. I wander through Lowe’s some days just wishing I would see that model again.

Aside from the fond feelings of the vacuum, this story is entirely true.

 

[DeckardNYC]

My most notorious boner was when I was like 16. I have told this story before, but it’s pretty good. So I’ll repeat it.

Pteen was working in the garage and, being 16, my penis was perpetually hard. I noticed a sexy shop vac over in the corner. So, short story long, I stuck my dick in that vacuum. I imagined it had on some lingerie. Then, I came pretty quickly. It was a fine upgrade from my hand.

I fucked that vacuum all summer.

Eventually, we grew apart. Wanted different things. Sometimes I still think of her round bottom, her wheels, her long hose and loud squeal. I wonder what would happen if things had been different. Sure, I see other vacuums now. But you never forget your first. I wander through Lowe’s some days just wishing I would see that model again.

Aside from the fond feelings of the vacuum, this story is entirely true.

Funny post. But you might want to read this before your next date. A vacuum scorned...

https://drmarkgriffiths.wordpress.c...ief-look-at-sexual-injury-by-vacuum-cleaners/

 

[hotwords229_A]

My most notorious boner was when I was like 16. I have told this story before, but it’s pretty good. So I’ll repeat it.

Pteen was working in the garage and, being 16, my penis was perpetually hard. I noticed a sexy shop vac over in the corner. So, short story long, I stuck my dick in that vacuum. I imagined it had on some lingerie. Then, I came pretty quickly. It was a fine upgrade from my hand.

I fucked that vacuum all summer.

Eventually, we grew apart. Wanted different things. Sometimes I still think of her round bottom, her wheels, her long hose and loud squeal. I wonder what would happen if things had been different. Sure, I see other vacuums now. But you never forget your first. I wander through Lowe’s some days just wishing I would see that model again.

Aside from the fond feelings of the vacuum, this story is entirely true.

I stuck my dick in a shop vac once and as soon as the suction began it scared me to death and I quickly turned it off. That was the longest three seconds of my life and I'm thankful to the penile Gods that it didn't rip my dick skin off!

It seems like such a good idea until you feel everything being pulled into that hose