Why do you choose to be a sub?

[Xplrngplsr]

I haven't experienced abuse.

However, life is often simply too much. Submission is a relief, a relaxation. Even despite ne being rather strong-willed a lot of the time. It just takes an even stronger person to dominate me, to give me that peace.

Yes. This. Exactly

 

[TinaCole]

I don't think I chose, it was made clear it was my place.

 

[Mrs_and_mr]

It’s not a choice.

 

[9to5]

I think it just happens. its just in you

 

[YourNewEnglandGirl]

I didn't choose to be a sub any more than I chose the color of my eyes. It's just who I am.

 

[Ciceri]

We all make choices and sometimes it’s overwhelming. When I met a Dom, I found someone who was willing to make choices for me - at least for the few hours a week we were together. It was an escape for me. I also like harsh punishment (for a couple reasons) and he loved administering pain. So it was a perfect arrangement. No one knows about this side of me and I trusted my Dom completely. His place was completely safe

 

[Ciceri]

We all make choices and sometimes it’s overwhelming. When I met a Dom, I found someone who was willing to make choices for me - at least for the few hours a week we were together. It was an escape for me. I also like harsh punishment (for a couple reasons) and he loved administering pain. So it was a perfect arrangement. No one knows about this side of me and I trusted my Dom completely. His place was completely safe

I have been with women and don’t feel a need to control or be controlled. It’s equilibrium. But being in a homosexual relationship brings my need to submit. It goes hand in hand

 

[SmilingLez]

i find strength in my submission, my true self flows.

 

[SweetTessyBen329]

I have been talking to my college friend and fuck-buddy who came to visit to cheer me up. She has some dom tendencies, whereas I lean the other way.

For me, I think part of being submissive in a sexual context is because I am the opposite IRL. I’m probably the person who wants to be in charge and to have a plan. She is the opposite, IRL she wouldn’t say boo to a goose, but gets off on controlling people sexually.

It it like this with other people?

Em

We’re all wired different I’m prefer being submissive the feeling of giving the pleasure and being owned in a respectful way

 

[Aisline2007]

I haven’t chosen to be a sub… not yet.
But the thought lingers—like a whisper against bare skin.
There’s something undeniably seductive about surrendering on my terms…
To be guided, claimed, undone… not because I must, but because I want to.
Because the right voice, the right touch, could make obedience feel like ecstasy.
So no—I haven’t bowed yet.
But maybe, just maybe… I’m waiting for the one who knows how to make me melt into it.

This was written to beautifully! This is exactly how I feel. Thank you for putting to words something I haven't been able to even define as of yet.

 

[Mrs_and_mr]

I don’t think it was a choice

 

[Oshkosh60]

From my earliest years, I wanted to be the slave to an older woman ..... As I matured, I still have that as a fantasy, but I am tall and strong (even at my age) and the women I partnered with over the years (girlfriends and spouse) was attracted to me for my masculine self..... and they didn't seem to want the other self that was beneath the surface. Did I ever let them know? No. I hinted a few times, asked directly just once.... the look I got disbelief...... had they only known I would have made a very good and pleasing slave......

 

[Jeanie99]

I desperately need someone else to be the one to make decisions for me sometimes. Someone who will give me what I need, even when its something I didnt know I needed.

 

[ChicagoR85]

This was written to beautifully! This is exactly how I feel. Thank you for putting to words something I haven't been able to even define as of yet.

@Aisline2007 some one , some day will find you. The stars will align

 

[Aisline2007]

@Aisline2007 some one , some day will find you. The stars will align

I wholeheartedly hope so. The search continues!

 

[ChicagoR85]

I wholeheartedly hope so. The search continues!

@Aisline2007 You being here , exploring is also the he first step towards that journey. Because when it happens, it will be bliss.

 

[Aisline2007]

@Aisline2007 You being here , exploring is also the he first step towards that journey. Because when it happens, it will be bliss.

I have to admit, it's getting hard to keep looking. But I hold out hope that the right person will find me!

 

[kinky_jat]

I have been talking to my college friend and fuck-buddy who came to visit to cheer me up. She has some dom tendencies, whereas I lean the other way.

For me, I think part of being submissive in a sexual context is because I am the opposite IRL. I’m probably the person who wants to be in charge and to have a plan. She is the opposite, IRL she wouldn’t say boo to a goose, but gets off on controlling people sexually.

It it like this with other people?

Em

Yes, I am like you. It is like a sexual escape from reality .