Women's sex drive after menopause?

[HumpDayHoratio]

s'okay, i sailed through menopause at 50, no noticeable symptoms. They waited a whole 10 years to show the fuck up. i'm now 64, husband's 72. I have to take a little care of my back and this limits us a bit position-wise though we do try and change things up with where, when, position with oral.

additional weight, thinning of vaginal tissue causing it to split almost every time we engaged in penetrative sex, a bunch of yeast infections till we got a handle on things, and a lack of sex drive mostly fueled by the discomfort and additional weight. Orgasms are like unicorns, since as much as i love oral sex it becomes too uncomfortable just about at the point when my clit's getting really interested. Very gentle oral works best, before penetrative sex, and masturbation is pretty much out of the question since the discomfort's not worth the unlikelihood of reaching O.

since i'm on a hypertension pill i cannot take hrt. So we've compromised by lots of lube, no pressure, and a willingness on my part to engage in oral at least once a week if not twice (almost always it's the starter to any sex we enjoy, anyway). We tend to manage things twice a week: once, oral for him—which i enjoy giving as it pleases me make him O—and the second time is generally penetrative. I might not O, but i still get pleasure from it and the intimacy. It takes a good three days, even with the lube, for my bits to feel 'recovered' and the splitting is rare now since we've worked out the best amounts of lube to use. Things can get super slippy, though, so care needs to be taken and there's not a lot of movement on my part, lol., and he hits my clit, it feels like it's been ripped off and that is NOT a good feeling!

So anyway, we still manage to get somethin'' somethin' about twice a week, even if it's not with the same passion and drive we had when we first met about 10 years ago.

Having said all this, if both partners have great companionship, shared as well as individual interests, and both are not feeling so sexy as they get older, what's wrong with dropping the sex? Men shouldn't feel guilty if they have ED issues as they age, just as women shouldn't feel pressured if they no longer have a sex drive. Yes, sex can be great, but it shouldn't be the lynchpin of a marriage/partnership. The IS a lot of pressure put on men to take ED meds to prolong sex into their 80s, and women are expected to make sex almost as much a priority as they age as it was when they were twenty! All i'm saying is that evaluate your relationships and see how they would suffer, or not; you might be surprised. ED and HRT were there for reasons other than getting your jollies in your old age, but business has a vested interest in making you feel you need to be 'young, slim & sexayyy'. Both being on the same page, though, there's the rub.

One last thing: i've known women whose husbands agreed their sex lives were pretty much a lovely memory, only to find their libido returning once all pressure was off!

Butters, you bring up some great points and honestly some things that have been gnawing at the back of my brain for a while. What if we are just meant to wind down? Mentally I’m not there but I wonder how much of that is propped up by Lit and porn and yes the incessant ads and society telling us “how” we should be.

Having said all that, some of the issues you mentioned my wife was experiencing. Not sure if you looked at a reply I posted on page 1 but it has some web links to some products my wife has had some success with. Maybe worth a look.

Best of luck!

 

[butters]

Butters, you bring up some great points and honestly some things that have been gnawing at the back of my brain for a while. What if we are just meant to wind down? Mentally I’m not there but I wonder how much of that is propped up by Lit and porn and yes the incessant ads and society telling us “how” we should be.

Having said all that, some of the issues you mentioned my wife was experiencing. Not sure if you looked at a reply I posted on page 1 but it has some web links to some products my wife has had some success with. Maybe worth a look.

Best of luck!

i'm all for 'if you still enjoy it and want to go for it, do so', and it's not exactly new... Charlie Chaplin was a father again in his 80s (don't get me started on that) BUT, there are seasons to one's life just like any other living thing. We don't expect children to be engaged in anything to do with sex; we hope childbirth doesn't happen till people are adults; we expect our kids to fly the nest when they're adults; we expect adults to couple up and reproduce; we expect (or hope) that older adults get to then pursue a new season in their lives which bring pleasures for themselves (whatever that entails) until they generally die before their children do.

As long as people are making decisions for themselves, and not because they are pushed into them by the pressure of an avaricious industry, then all is well. But i'd hope that when sex may no longer be a part of our lives that me and H will still love eachother and want to be together just as much as we do now, sharing interests and kisses, holding hands, and still be interested in one another for who we are.

Of course he is…. but at least any litsters that might have considered engaging him or sharing pics or details know not to. If that’s how he treats his wife, imagine how he treats someone in a more casual relationship? Fucking creep.

the casual ownership as seen in too many relationships might mean he simply didn't see anything wrong with doing this..which is why it's an issue, still, today

 

[KatieDoes]

the casual ownership as seen in too many relationships might mean he simply didn't see anything wrong with doing this..which is why it's an issue, still, today

Not just him.. this thread has thousands of views. Probably 90% men that call themselves good men and nice guys, and not one of them said shit about him obviously exploiting a woman. Just heart react and stroke some more. It’s not like women are actually people.

 

[butters]

Not just him.. this thread has thousands of views. Probably 90% men that call themselves good men and nice guys, and not one of them said shit about him obviously exploiting a woman. Just heart react and stroke some more. It’s not like women are actually people.

i'd never, EVER even consider posting an image of my husband without his permission, not because i'm scared of him or because i 'obey' my husband (hah!), but simply because it is not mine to share without that explicit 'go ahead'. I just wouldn't. And yet for so many guys (and there are some women, too, no doubt) that wouldn't even appear as a blip on their thought-radar. Education, education, education.

 

[KatieDoes]

i'd never, EVER even consider posting an image of my husband without his permission, not because i'm scared of him or because i 'obey' my husband (hah!), but simply because it is not mine to share without that explicit 'go ahead'. I just wouldn't. And yet for so many guys (and there are some women, too, no doubt) that wouldn't even appear as a blip on their thought-radar. Education, education, education.

I’ve been the lucky recipient of quite a few sexy pics from both men and women. I would NEVER post them without their express enthusiastic consent. It’s gross and disgusting.

Why don’t more women participate here? Why doesn’t anyone answer my personal?
Why don’t women reply to my unsolicited private messages?

Because we’re overrun with misogynistic creepy assholes. That’s why. Deal with them and see if things change.

 

[Rob_Royale]

Not just him.. this thread has thousands of views. Probably 90% men that call themselves good men and nice guys, and not one of them said shit about him obviously exploiting a woman. Just heart react and stroke some more. It’s not like women are actually people.

Just because he posted pics of his "alleged" wife, doesn't mean he's exploiting anyone. And I DID call him on it. Most other people wouldn't go further than that because it would most certainly have derailed this thread. Much like YOU have done.

Because we’re overrun with misogynistic creepy assholes. That’s why. Deal with them and see if things change.

Is there anything else you'd like to discuss on my thread, on a subject that is unrelated to your rant? Global warming? Glass ceiling? The flight speed of an unladen swallow?

 

[KatieDoes]

Just because he posted pics of his "alleged" wife, doesn't mean he's exploiting anyone. And I DID call him on it. Most other people wouldn't go further than that because it would most certainly have derailed this thread. Much like YOU have done.



Is there anything else you'd like to discuss on my thread, on a subject that is unrelated to your rant? Global warming? Glass ceiling? The flight speed of an unladen swallow?

You called him on derailing your thread, not for posting someone’s nudes without their consent.

Whether she’s his wife or not, she is SOMEONE.

Sorry not sorry for ‘derailing’ your thread. Every place is the right place for calling out this bullshit. Imagine being more concerned that your little topic shifted than you are about the woman in those photos.

Y’all are fucking disgusting.

 

[Lifestyle66]

You called him on derailing your thread, not for posting someone’s nudes without their consent.

Whether she’s his wife or not, she is SOMEONE.

Sorry not sorry for ‘derailing’ your thread. Every place is the right place for calling out this bullshit. Imagine being more concerned that your little topic shifted than you are about the woman in those photos.

Y’all are fucking disgusting.

Welcome to the clubhouse! Personally, I've found most people to be disgusting with their various rants and fetishes, and just not seeing things MY WAY (as they OBVIOUSLY should)! You must be somewhat young and naive to be so surprised.



But... Back to the issue of sex drive, who else has tried slow-release hormone pellets I mentioned earlier?

My wife is in the middle of her three-month pellet cycle and has a high sex drive. But for the past three days, the constant activity hosting overnight guests has her tonight declining her usual videos, toys and my offer of helping her, and she's resorting to a shot of sleep aid to get caught up on her rest.

 

[KatieDoes]

Welcome to the clubhouse! Personally, I've found most people to be disgusting with their various rants and fetishes, and just not seeing things MY WAY (as they OBVIOUSLY should)! You must be somewhat young and naive to be so surprised.



But... Back to the issue of sex drive, who else has tried slow-release hormone pellets I mentioned earlier?

My wife is in the middle of her three-month pellet cycle and has a high sex drive. But for the past three days, the constant activity hosting overnight guests has her tonight declining her usual videos, toys and my offer of helping her, and she's resorting to a shot of sleep aid to get caught up on her rest.

yeah… welcome to the clubhouse. She’s only a woman, after all. Why should she matter?

 

[Lifestyle66]

yeah… welcome to the clubhouse. She’s only a woman, after all. Why should she matter?

And that's the real question: "Why should she matter?"

The answer is that she doesn't matter any more or less than anyone else here who you also know nothing about. So why are you injecting such animosity toward others you don't know with general statements like "Y’all are fucking disgusting" in supposed defense of someone else you don't know?


Sooo... back to the subject at hand: Have you gone through menopause, and if so what's you sex drive like? Or have you even gotten laid lately?

 

[KatieDoes]

And that's the real question: "Why should she matter?"

The answer is that she doesn't matter any more or less than anyone else here who you also know nothing about. So why are you injecting such animosity toward others you don't know with general statements like "Y’all are fucking disgusting" in supposed defense of someone else you don't know?


Sooo... back to the subject at hand: Have you gone through menopause, and if so what's you sex drive like? Or have you even gotten laid lately?

Your position is that no one should care about women being exploited unless we know them personally?

Whew. Wow. Ok. That’s a take, I suppose.

I answered the question months ago, and get laid as often as I want.

 

[HampshireBoy]

Not just him.. this thread has thousands of views. Probably 90% men that call themselves good men and nice guys, and not one of them said shit about him obviously exploiting a woman. Just heart react and stroke some more. It’s not like women are actually people.

That is a very fair point, I agreed with your posts but didn't add my condemnation - I probably should have done. In fairness a lot of guys probably just flicked straight on to the next post.

Like you, I have received photos that other people have sent me and would never share them publically without that persons permission. I probably still have somewhere some photos that I friend edited of herself, suggesting that I use them to illustrate a story that I was writing; I never finished the story so the photos never saw the light of day. Even those won't be shared, unless I go back to ask her. I'm certainly a long way from perfect but sharing someones private photos without permission feels wrong to me.

 

[KatieDoes]

That is a very fair point, I agreed with your posts but didn't add my condemnation - I probably should have done. In fairness a lot of guys probably just flicked straight on to the next post.

Like you, I have received photos that other people have sent me and would never share them publically without that persons permission. I probably still have somewhere some photos that I friend edited of herself, suggesting that I use them to illustrate a story that I was writing; I never finished the story so the photos never saw the light of day. Even those won't be shared, unless I go back to ask her. I'm certainly a long way from perfect but sharing someones private photos without permission feels wrong to me.

They think I ‘derailed the thread’ because they don’t listen to women.

a woman’s sex drive fires up from between her ears, not from between her legs. and these dudes^ dont get that. As we reach the biological age when our children no longer need us, our bodies cease to produce the hormones that cause us to nurture and care for and put everyone else ahead of ourselves. So we stop doing things to serve others, and focus on doing what we want. we don’t want to fuck shitty men So if dudes want to continue with this attitude of ownership and entitlement and expectation, they’re not going to get the results they want.


Ive read thread after thread after thread here from men making their wives menopause about themselves. Overwhelmingly, they are looking for advice (from other men, they don’t listen to women) on how to make her willing to fuck them. Not how to make themselves desirable to her so she WANTS to fuck them.


It’s all just womens hormones. Thats the problem. It can’t possibly be that their attitudes about women are wholly unattractive. Bitches just be crazy. That’s the only possible explanation.

 

[HampshireBoy]

They think I ‘derailed the thread’ because they don’t listen to women.

a woman’s sex drive fires up from between her ears, not from between her legs. and these dudes^ dont get that. As we reach the biological age when our children no longer need us, our bodies cease to produce the hormones that cause us to nurture and care for and put everyone else ahead of ourselves. So we stop doing things to serve others, and focus on doing what we want. we don’t want to fuck shitty men So if dudes want to continue with this attitude of ownership and entitlement and expectation, they’re not going to get the results they want.

There *might* be a small percentage of women who want to be owned like that, but you're right about the vast majority. Quite a few of our female friends, who are at that age - sixty and older - are looking to life the best life, for some that includes sex for others it doesn't, same as some want a male companion and others don't.

Ive read thread after thread after thread here from men making their wives menopause about themselves. Overwhelmingly, they are looking for advice (from other men, they don’t listen to women) on how to make her willing to fuck them. Not how to make themselves desirable to her so she WANTS to fuck them.

For myself I've looked for information to understand what is happening to the woman in my life, luckily my wife wants to discuss and explain. It's more about making her feel desirable and knowing that its not just about penetration. Yes, I miss sex but we have plenty of intimacy and loving. Its also about her "guilt" (her word) for "losing" her sex drive, and my trying to make clear that she has nothing to feel "guilty" about. Growing old can be a bugger lol

It’s all just womens hormones. Thats the problem. It can’t possibly be that their attitudes about women are wholly unattractive. Bitches just be crazy. That’s the only possible explanation.

I do wonder how some guys ever got laid lol In fairness some womens moods can swing wildly at times, probably hormones lol

 

[Lifestyle66]

They think I ‘derailed the thread’ because they don’t listen to women.

a woman’s sex drive fires up from between her ears, not from between her legs. and these dudes^ dont get that. As we reach the biological age when our children no longer need us, our bodies cease to produce the hormones that cause us to nurture and care for and put everyone else ahead of ourselves. So we stop doing things to serve others, and focus on doing what we want. we don’t want to fuck shitty men So if dudes want to continue with this attitude of ownership and entitlement and expectation, they’re not going to get the results they want.


Ive read thread after thread after thread here from men making their wives menopause about themselves. Overwhelmingly, they are looking for advice (from other men, they don’t listen to women) on how to make her willing to fuck them. Not how to make themselves desirable to her so she WANTS to fuck them.


It’s all just womens hormones. Thats the problem. It can’t possibly be that their attitudes about women are wholly unattractive. Bitches just be crazy. That’s the only possible explanation.

The OP started this thread talking about his own problems with ED and his discussions with his wife over her menopause.

He asked the question: "What success after menopause have you folks had at restarting your or your spouse's sex drive after menopause?" His intent seems to be asking about BOTH husband and wives.

I related the advice my wife has been freely giving all of her female friends and neighbors repeatedly, suggesting those who are feeling less energetic and having zero libido at least consult with a med spa doctor. My wife has realized after now over two years of the three-month cycles of the hormone pellets raising and lowering her hormone levels that those hormones are the primary drivers of her interest! Ten weeks after the last pellets were inserted, her interest in sex begins to drop, and so does her energy levels in doing any other activities! In the 11th and 12th weeks, she even has difficulty getting out of bed in the mornings, choosing to sleep later. Then within a week after receiving the new pellets, she back, getting up in the morning feeling good and suggesting sex almost every evening. And if I can't help get her the "over the top" orgasm (after all, I'm just an aging disgusting misogynistic creepy asshole), ... then I'll find her toys out in the morning.

So, to the OP's question: The success my wife and I found actually took HER (my wife) talking to THREE other women who experienced those hormone changes, before she went for a consult at a med spa. My wife didn't believe the first woman who told her about the hormones. It took two others my wife met under different circumstances (one at a nail saloon) happening to mention it before she decided to give it a try. Now, she's one of those actively trying to convince other women to consider going against the indoctrination that "it's all in your head (between your ears)".

And to the OP's question: In regards to male sexual performance, I also tried the hormone pellets at that first consult along with my wife. We had to first go to the med spa to get a blood test form, then go to a blood drawing place for them to receive the blood test results BEFORE the consult. The doctor (yes, it's a real MD who has this as a side practice who also works at the local hospital, he said my testerone level was already at the mid-range for a healthy male (620 in a range of 300-900ng). So, he asked if I still wanted to try the pellets, too. I replied "Okay, why not." So, I took the same pellet treatment (just more heavily with testerone for men, and it lasts six months instead of three for women.) My experience was NOT as pleasant as the wife's experience, when after two or three months, I realized we were arguing and fighting more often (not over sex, but over anything). As my pellets finally wore off, I calmed down and won't go back to trying them again without another blood test which shows my levels to be much lower to start! Two years ago, ramping up my already 620 testosterone level even higher seemed to be the cause of my months of anger and aggressive reaction (I would angrily storm out of the room, feeling like I wanted to punch something) to what would normally be a calm disagreement.

But I'm a now a calmer, disgusting misogynistic asshole with a high libido wife!

 

[Lifestyle66]

There *might* be a small percentage of women who want to be owned like that, but you're right about the vast majority. Quite a few of our female friends, who are at that age - sixty and older - are looking to life the best life, for some that includes sex for others it doesn't, same as some want a male companion and others don't.

For myself I've looked for information to understand what is happening to the woman in my life, luckily my wife wants to discuss and explain. It's more about making her feel desirable and knowing that its not just about penetration. Yes, I miss sex but we have plenty of intimacy and loving. Its also about her "guilt" (her word) for "losing" her sex drive, and my trying to make clear that she has nothing to feel "guilty" about. Growing old can be a bugger lol

I do wonder how some guys ever got laid lol In fairness some womens moods can swing wildly at times, probably hormones lol

And to my point, as long as MOST women continue listening to the indoctrination that it's moods, then "they won't know what they don't know".

My wife, on her own with no prompting from me, finally believed the stories and personal experiences of three other women, and my wife decided to try hormone treatments. Now, she swears by those slow-release hormones and is now dreading the fact our next vacation will delay her next three-month treatment by two weeks. EDIT: My wife KNOWS because of her repeated experiences, that her future moodiness will be due to those hormones wearing off. And she's already made the appointment for her next set of pellets after we return from the vacation.

 

[KatieDoes]

There *might* be a small percentage of women who want to be owned like that, but you're right about the vast majority. Quite a few of our female friends, who are at that age - sixty and older - are looking to life the best life, for some
that includes sex for others it doesn't, same as some want a male companion and others don't.

That sort of ‘ownership’ is something that is voluntarily given, though. Not something taken. So if she’d given that, he’d have had her consent to post those pics.

 

[ImiGirrst]

The OP started this thread talking about his own problems with ED and his discussions with his wife over her menopause.

He asked the question: "What success after menopause have you folks had at restarting your or your spouse's sex drive after menopause?" His intent seems to be asking about BOTH husband and wives.

I related the advice my wife has been freely giving all of her female friends and neighbors repeatedly, suggesting those who are feeling less energetic and having zero libido at least consult with a med spa doctor. My wife has realized after now over two years of the three-month cycles of the hormone pellets raising and lowering her hormone levels that those hormones are the primary drivers of her interest! Ten weeks after the last pellets were inserted, her interest in sex begins to drop, and so does her energy levels in doing any other activities! In the 11th and 12th weeks, she even has difficulty getting out of bed in the mornings, choosing to sleep later. Then within a week after receiving the new pellets, she back, getting up in the morning feeling good and suggesting sex almost every evening. And if I can't help get her the "over the top" orgasm (after all, I'm just an aging disgusting misogynistic creepy asshole), ... then I'll find her toys out in the morning.

This is promising! I'm going to get my first pellets today! So I have hopes that I will respond similarly. I'll report back in on this thread when I know more.

So, to the OP's question: The success my wife and I found actually took HER (my wife) talking to THREE other women who experienced those hormone changes, before she went for a consult at a med spa. My wife didn't believe the first woman who told her about the hormones. It took two others my wife met under different circumstances (one at a nail saloon) happening to mention it before she decided to give it a try. Now, she's one of those actively trying to convince other women to consider going against the indoctrination that "it's all in your head (between your ears)".

I found out when my GYN did blood work as it applied to my HRT. Turns out that was at the right level for a menopausal woman, but my testosterone was low for the same.

And to the OP's question: In regards to male sexual performance, I also tried the hormone pellets at that first consult along with my wife. We had to first go to the med spa to get a blood test form, then go to a blood drawing place for them to receive the blood test results BEFORE the consult. The doctor (yes, it's a real MD who has this as a side practice who also works at the local hospital, he said my testerone level was already at the mid-range for a healthy male (620 in a range of 300-900ng). So, he asked if I still wanted to try the pellets, too. I replied "Okay, why not." So, I took the same pellet treatment (just more heavily with testerone for men, and it lasts six months instead of three for women.) My experience was NOT as pleasant as the wife's experience, when after two or three months, I realized we were arguing and fighting more often (not over sex, but over anything). As my pellets finally wore off, I calmed down and won't go back to trying them again without another blood test which shows my levels to be much lower to start! Two years ago, ramping up my already 620 testosterone level even higher seemed to be the cause of my months of anger and aggressive reaction (I would angrily storm out of the room, feeling like I wanted to punch something) to what would normally be a calm disagreement.

This was EXACTLY what my GYN said. He told me that men have a different cycle and different level of testosterone than women. And the pellets wouldn't necessarily be a good option for me, because it's steady state release. Men need to go up and down, which is why an injection every two weeks works better for them. If a woman tried to do injections, it would be twice a week! And it would likely jerk her around, causing this kind of reaction in her.

But I'm a now a calmer, disgusting misogynistic asshole with a high libido wife!

But are you able to keep up with her libido?

 

[ImiGirrst]

Ive read thread after thread after thread here from men making their wives menopause about themselves. Overwhelmingly, they are looking for advice (from other men, they don’t listen to women) on how to make her willing to fuck them. Not how to make themselves desirable to her so she WANTS to fuck them.


It’s all just womens hormones. Thats the problem. It can’t possibly be that their attitudes about women are wholly unattractive. Bitches just be crazy. That’s the only possible explanation.

Oh, this is soooo true. I would go one step farther, that if 'they' (the guys who are wondering how to get fucked) would concentrate on 'dating' their wives again - and everything that went with it - their wives would start to want to get intimate again. And when she didn't work the way she wanted to, now that she is inspired to get intimate again, she will search out a means to address it. That's when you get the three girlfriends weighing in.

And truly, there are so many benefits in addition to getting a libido back. As @Lifestyle66 said, there is the energy factor. I'm looking forward to having less brain fog. And then there is the ability to retain muscle mass. No woman actually likes have flabby under arms and I bet there are a whole bunch like me to thought it had everything to do with getting lazier as I got older, as opposed to not having enough of the hormone that would allow us to keep what we already had.

 

[Lifestyle66]

This is promising! I'm going to get my first pellets today! So I have hopes that I will respond similarly. I'll report back in on this thread when I know more.


But are you able to keep up with her libido?

I'll be very interested to hear about your experience. My wife's first set of pellets took just over two weeks before she really noticed her energy increase. But it was her second set of pellets three months later, when a week after insertion she noticed her much greater interest in sex. Then after her third set and a week later, the drive went even higher.

And to answer your questions: "No! I can't keep up with her desires." But I pay for all of her toys and offer help whenever she wants. From about week two through ten after the pellet insertions, we'll have sex three or four times per week. She'll often stay up later than me to "watch her chick flic series". Then in the mornings, I'll again find different toys out and used. Last week, we were playing a card game (just the two of us), when she offered a bet: "If I [the wife] win, you'll take me out to an expensive restaurant of my choice. And if you win, I'll give you a blowjob." I accepted her bet. And I WON!

I've teased her before that "It's not really a blowjob, until the job is done." She tried her best, but although hard enough and enjoying her efforts, after five minutes I finally told her I just wanted to fuck her on the living room floor, which we did. She replied "Well, I still get credit for a blowjob and paying off the bet." (And I'll still take her out to any restaurant she chooses! I love her!)

 

[Lifestyle66]

And truly, there are so many benefits in addition to getting a libido back. As @Lifestyle66 said, there is the energy factor. I'm looking forward to having less brain fog. And then there is the ability to retain muscle mass. No woman actually likes have flabby under arms and I bet there are a whole bunch like me to thought it had everything to do with getting lazier as I got older, as opposed to not having enough of the hormone that would allow us to keep what we already had.

Besides the energy level needed to exercise, to prevent the flabby underarms you need the right exercises to build those underarm muscles (ie. push-ups or lying on your back and weightlifting). Then after exercise, drink a "whey protein" mix. You'll find that highly soluble protein powder (in the U.S. at least) in any pharmacy or supermarket. My weight-lifting coaching son turned us on to that strategy by telling us "Carbs before exercise gives you energy. Exercise your muscles until they're tired. Then the protein is needed to help rebuild any muscle mass lost during the exercise." My son has a 14% BMI (extremely low body fat).

 

[DoctorSmith8]

My wife and I have been together for 31 years and change, and for 30 or so enjoyed a terrific sex life. At about the same time she started menopause, I developed ED. I've been taking steps on the ED, exercising, eating less, Cialis etc. However, only moderate success. We talked about it last night and she finally admitted that her sex drive has nearly disappeared entirely due to menopause and that I really shouldn't worry too much about the ED. She mentioned that it's often a permanent thing after menopause as well. My limited online investigations seem to bear that out. I'm going to continue my efforts at getting healthier but I'm not ready to give up on our sex life.

What success after menopause have you folks had at restarting your or your spouse's sex drive after menopause? I'd really like some advice. Please do not bother mentioning options that include swinging or any other sort of sharing. Neither of us is interested. We will be talking to our doctor.

We are still loving and intimate and make efforts to make sure that we don't end up being roommates instead of lovers. We're both committed to that, and it's the only bright side to this. Any insight would be appreciated.

Menopause not only causes loss of interest, but the lining of the vaginal canal changes to the point that penetrating is painful. It's a hell of a situation to be in because unlike yourself, I am still fully functional. It's very depressing.

 

[nylooking]

Menopause not only causes loss of interest, but the lining of the vaginal canal changes to the point that penetrating is painful. It's a hell of a situation to be in because unlike yourself, I am still fully functional. It's very depressing.

Mine is 61 and has now been on the estrogen cream for almost a year. It’s made a tremendous difference. She actually initiates sometimes now. Something she hasn’t done in many years!
My problem now is keeping up with her. I actually have an appointment coming up to see why I start off strong, then fade after a bit!
I try and give her at least one orgasm first, then if she hasn’t had another by the time Je decides he’s done, the toys help her finish !

 

[DoctorSmith8]

Mine is 61 and has now been on the estrogen cream for almost a year. It’s made a tremendous difference. She actually initiates sometimes now. Something she hasn’t done in many years!
My problem now is keeping up with her. I actually have an appointment coming up to see why I start off strong, then fade after a bit!
I try and give her at least one orgasm first, then if she hasn’t had another by the time Je decides he’s done, the toys help her finish !

Sounds like you are in a better situation than me. I got some generic Viagera a while back just to experiment with. I used it on some photo sessions to keep me hard. It worked really well. It takes about an hour to get in your system. When I feel a little flushed sensation in my face, I know it is ready to work. It doesn't automatically give you a boner. You still need some stimulation, but after it's up, it stays hard until you cum.