Mine started in 2017 when the wife started having autoimmune issues. She either
(a) does not feel like it
(b) feels like it, but knows it will hurt too much to do it
(c) suggests we try, and then stops me half way through
The only thing that stops me punching holes in the walls some days is the knowledge this house is lath and plaster so it is going to HURT, not just hurt. Of course, not being able to do it throws up issues on both sides. I get horny and grouchy, as the trouser tyrant has minimal understanding of the situation, and she gets insecure, jealous and nasty because she knows I want it, and want it badly. She's always afraid I'll go and get some elsewhere, and can act out because of it. Lack of sex has led to a lack of intimacy, and has eroded our relationship quite badly, so there are times when both of us can feel very alone.
I do have a couple of woman I am close to other than my wife, but I just wouldn't try and convert either of them into a mistress - too damn disrespectful towards my wife and them. There is one young woman - I usually refer to her as muse or SG - who is more of an intellectual sparring partner and substitute niece than anything else, but that is not written in stone. Because we are uncannily close in our worldviews and enjoy one another's company, it is one of those relationships where I have to keep acknowledging the attraction so that I don't do anything stupid. The other one is her sister, who is less intellectually challenging than her sister, but gets my sense of humor, and slightly cock-eyed view of the universe - and there is an attraction that I have to acknowledge there too. For me neither of them is 'fling' material. I would want to settle down with one or the other hand have a family even though I am getting too old for that nonsense.
(a) does not feel like it
(b) feels like it, but knows it will hurt too much to do it
(c) suggests we try, and then stops me half way through
The only thing that stops me punching holes in the walls some days is the knowledge this house is lath and plaster so it is going to HURT, not just hurt. Of course, not being able to do it throws up issues on both sides. I get horny and grouchy, as the trouser tyrant has minimal understanding of the situation, and she gets insecure, jealous and nasty because she knows I want it, and want it badly. She's always afraid I'll go and get some elsewhere, and can act out because of it. Lack of sex has led to a lack of intimacy, and has eroded our relationship quite badly, so there are times when both of us can feel very alone.
I do have a couple of woman I am close to other than my wife, but I just wouldn't try and convert either of them into a mistress - too damn disrespectful towards my wife and them. There is one young woman - I usually refer to her as muse or SG - who is more of an intellectual sparring partner and substitute niece than anything else, but that is not written in stone. Because we are uncannily close in our worldviews and enjoy one another's company, it is one of those relationships where I have to keep acknowledging the attraction so that I don't do anything stupid. The other one is her sister, who is less intellectually challenging than her sister, but gets my sense of humor, and slightly cock-eyed view of the universe - and there is an attraction that I have to acknowledge there too. For me neither of them is 'fling' material. I would want to settle down with one or the other hand have a family even though I am getting too old for that nonsense.
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