Men, women & who’s who…

[bestkeptsecret678]

We all have our suspicions and suspects, but has anyone arrived at any conclusions (based on fact, please) about the share of female lit members who, uh…. Aren’t?

As men are the erotically/sexually more assertive gender, I understand there will always be more of us on Lit than there are women; That’s fundamental, I’d submit.

But how prevalent is the female pretender?

And in the spirit of not stereotyping anyone, I guess the question goes both ways, what’s prevalence of women posing as men?

Asking for a friend.

 

[Lady2020]

The eternal Lit question. I've been asked to provide a pic of my hand to prove what I am. I might have been inclined to do it if it hadn't caught me by surprise after we moved to Skype. He posted a pic of his hand. How do I know it was his hand? I don't do pics bc of my age and am upfront about it. I can understand why people need more proof though, esp if they've been conned before.

 

[Chillygirl]

I haven’t had a problem on lit but I was accused of catfishing on reddit. Someone said I stole my pictures off the internet I was pretty flattered!

 

[Booboobear84]

The eternal Lit question. I've been asked to provide a pic of my hand to prove what I am. I might have been inclined to do it if it hadn't caught me by surprise after we moved to Skype. He posted a pic of his hand. How do I know it was his hand? I don't do pics bc of my age and am upfront about it. I can understand why people need more proof though, esp if they've been conned before.

Curious as to how you feel about voice verification?

 

[lil_jenni]

Trust me... As a woman online, the moment you turn down whatever sexual fantasy certain guys want to cast you in, you are likely to be accused of being a man. I'm not sure why this is the default conclusion. If I'm scamming or shit like that, wouldn't I be more likely to engage than to tell you to leave me the fuck alone?

Anyway, since I liked to be believed, I tend to believe others until I have some reason not to do so. And I think the number of fake females is probably lower than most guys think. But what do I know, since I must be a dude because I won't share pics...

 

[lil_jenni]

Curious as to how you feel about voice verification?

Personally, I feel insulted by any requested verification. If someone thinks I'm fake, they don't have to interact with me.

 

[bestkeptsecret678]

Trust me... As a woman online, the moment you turn down whatever sexual fantasy certain guys want to cast you in, you are likely to be accused of being a man. I'm not sure why this is the default conclusion. If I'm scamming or shit like that, wouldn't I be more likely to engage than to tell you to leave me the fuck alone?

Anyway, since I liked to be believed, I tend to believe others until I have some reason not to do so. And I think the number of fake females is probably lower than most guys think. But what do I know, since I must be a dude because I won't share pics...

I'm surprised a Lit analytical specialist (i.e. one of us) hasn't made a valiant effort to quantify this myth.

 

[ShaneoD]

Trust me... As a woman online, the moment you turn down whatever sexual fantasy certain guys want to cast you in, you are likely to be accused of being a man. I'm not sure why this is the default conclusion. If I'm scamming or shit like that, wouldn't I be more likely to engage than to tell you to leave me the fuck alone?

I was going to say it's probably because the majority of times a guy comes across a beautiful lady online she's either 2.99 a minute or as you've said a guy trying to get a one off payment for nudes, it also sets up this weird misconception for some guys that every girl online is there to please them, which is probably where the backlash from not entertaining their fantasies comes from. I remember an ex asking me what C2C mean and thinking "shit" while she was on another chat site.

Then I guess you've also got the socially awkward who don't know how to talk to anyone much less talk to a woman with her own thoughts, opinions and fantasies.

I'm not sure how many fake ladies there are on lit, there's a lot to consider there, is it that ladies misrepresenting themselves, guys pretending to be girls or scammers, of you add those together I think guys should be sceptical, but you can be sceptical without burning bridges (that's a polite way of saying not being an asshole lol)

 

[ShaneoD]

I should also give a hat tip to @Daisy_Love for clueing me into reading how people write things, like is a girl things from my perspective and how I felt/feel, or is what they've written coming from a male fantasy but attempting to be tailored to fit a female profile.

 

[lil_jenni]

I should also give a hat tip to @Daisy_Love for clueing me into reading how people write things, like is a girl things from my perspective and how I felt/feel, or is what they've written coming from a male fantasy but attempting to be tailored to fit a female profile.

I feel like sometimes guys think I'm a guy because I'm foul mouthed and slutty...

But then I talk about my bouts of crippling anxiety and self doubt, and say shit like I'm the lucky one, not my Hubby, and the misogyny I can get in response to actually having feelings besides about sex is so palatable that they must think I'm a woman...

 

[Lady2020]

Curious as to how you feel about voice verification?

What about it?

 

[bestkeptsecret678]

I feel like sometimes guys think I'm a guy because I'm foul mouthed and slutty...

But then I talk about my bouts of crippling anxiety and self doubt, and say shit like I'm the lucky one, not my Hubby, and the misogyny I can get in response to actually having feelings besides about sex is so palatable that they must think I'm a woman...

sounds like a recap of the many boxes we’re supposed to fit into.

The most interesting people are those who fit into the wrong box (based on public perception) or multiple boxes, or no established box at all.

Keep being you, it always pays off.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Trust me... As a woman online…

An ALLEGED woman.



I don’t think the woman catfish is as rare as you think. But I believe it comes in a different form.

I believe the women who catfish here are just playing another role. Not that of a man. But usually of a younger, beautiful woman who leads a jet setting fabulous life or leads a scandalous sex life that they never got to lead.

There is one particular catfish on this site with whom most people here have interacted. If I said the name, people would throw their arms up and throw pitchforks at me. In fact, that’s what happened when I said it the first time. The profile is completely fake, as portrayed by the operator. However, my opinion is that it’s a woman.

And then there was the infamous Brianna38. RIP.

Honestly, while the female catfish are less prevalent, I believe they do more harm than the guy pretending to be a girl. The guys playing 18 year old girls who like 55 year old men might fool a guy here or there in some textual e-boning. But that’s the extent. Look at what Brianna did. She had genuine friends here. People have a shit when she “died”. People cried real tears. Thats way more manipulative and damaging than the other way.

TL;DR version: Men do it more often. Women are way meaner with it.