If I was a...then I would

[BadAmy]

I'm probably going to regret this.
(so why do it you ask?)
because, I'm fuckin Badamy.

and I wanna up my internet points. aka post count.

so this is the gist...
if I was a________________
I would________________

lets get the meditation pillows out and start manifesting the idea of being someone or something else.
and if you were, well then! what would you do?

I'll start.

If I was a guy, I would do yoga to suck my own cock.

what about you?

 

[BadAmy]

ok badamy!
I'll bite
if I was a moderator, I'd shut this thread down, cuz its stupid.

 

[sallysparrow23]

If I was a cat I would lick my own butt.

 

[ydahecnot]

If I were a hammer, I would make every day hammer time

 

[AmberLGreen]

If I was a sex toy, I would be a cock ring

 

[deft]

If I was a sculptor... huh... but, then again... no.

 

[sallysparrow23]

If I was a sculptor... huh... but, then again... no.

If I was Elton John I would sing Your Song.

 

[BadAmy]

If I was a sculptor... huh... but, then again... no.

 

[jason28053]

If I was a sex toy, I would be a cock ring

That’s how I pictured you Debbie

 

[BadAmy]

if I was a dessert, I would be whipped cream and jello.

 

[tallladiesman]

If I was in my twenties I would be all over tinder like a rash

 

[BadAmy]

If I was a rich man.....yadayadayadayadayadayadaydadyadaya

I'm sorry, someone was gonna do it.

 

[BadAmy]

If I was a porn star, I 'd sell pics of my feet.
they're the least controversial part of me.

 

[SexyVita]

If I was in my twenties I would be all over tinder like a rash

You'd probably have a few rashes too! Just sayin'.

If I were an astronaut, I'd probe the mysteries of Uranus.

 

[ydahecnot]

If she was, she’d be right there with it

 

[ydahecnot]

If I was a rich man.....yadayadayadayadayadayadaydadyadaya

I'm sorry, someone was gonna do it.

That triggered my subjunctive OCD

 

[BadAmy]

That triggered my subjunctive OCD

did i do it enough times tho?

 

[ydahecnot]

did i do it enough times tho?

I meant using “was” instead of “were”

 

[AmberLGreen]

If I was a serial killer, I would keep the big toe of all my victims in a jar on my window sill

 

[AmberLGreen]

If I was in charge of the grammar police, I would hire @ydahecnot

 

[BrendaD]

If I were a guitar player
Lord, I'd have to play the blues

Oh wait.. I am and do… so that doesn’t count!

 

[AmberLGreen]

If I was a number, I would be number one

 

[ydahecnot]

If I was ever thinking about invoking a Talking Heads lyric again, I would slap sense into myself

 

[BrendaD]

If I was ever thinking about invoking a Talking Heads lyric again, I would slap sense into myself

C’mon! Stop making sense!!!

 

[jason28053]

If I was a traffic light, I would be green