If I was a...then I would

[Leigh81]

If I were working then I would not be on here....maybe

 

[curious_slut]

If I were an ocean wave, I'd crash right into you.

 

[sno_22]

If I was a woman, I'd still only be interested in women

If I was a comet, I'd pass just close enough to mess up the ozone layer

If I was a star, I'd implode

If I was a turkey, I'd be telling you to eat me

 

[Lorack]

IF I was rich, I wouldn't be poor

 

[AnnyMouse28]

If I was not undatable/loveable/etc I wouldn't be spending the day alone or something like that.

 

[Chillygirl]

If I was more motivated I’d rearrange my living room.

 

[sallysparrow23]

If I was an ice cube, I'd melt in your mouth.

 

[lilmissdarling]

If I was a beverage, I'd be a vodka cranberry

 

[~Elizabeth~]

If I were a vibrator I would be turned on all the time.

 

[Leigh81]

If I were a polar bear, I'd be outside

 

[curious_slut]

If I were a watch, I'd still never be running on time.

 

[hardnshiney]

If I were a man that made sense I would ask all the willing women
How much cents would I have to make ?

 

[hardnshiney]

If I were a watch, I'd still never be running on time.

If you’d let me watch
I’d run on your time