A question for the Gentlemen of the forum.

[tenchikoi]

What makes you feel 'sexy'? I asked my guy this and he said he doesn't feel sexy. He just said if he sees the right visual input he likes he's ready to go. But that's just being turned on. Do guys ever feel sexy with themselves apart from outside stimulation? I'm just curious. Trying to help him be more in touch with his carnal side and not feel ashamed. Thanks for reading.

 

[Lady2020]

FWIW, my guy is sexy as hell 24/7 and he knows it.

 

[Privates1stClass]

What makes you feel 'sexy'?

Knowing the woman on my arm thinks I'm sexy. I don't really care about what the other women think.

 

[jehoram]

Compliments! And the occasional touch of a hand on my arm. And, from my wife, an occasional random kiss.

 

[PapaDan]

What makes you feel 'sexy'? I asked my guy this and he said he doesn't feel sexy. He just said if he sees the right visual input he likes he's ready to go. But that's just being turned on. Do guys ever feel sexy with themselves apart from outside stimulation? I'm just curious. Trying to help him be more in touch with his carnal side and not feel ashamed. Thanks for reading.

In my opinion being a man myself, "feeling sexy", (as you put it), is a personal trait in a man, and it would appear that most men simply don't have this trait. Most men just get horny. With this said however, there are some men who feel and maintain themselves in a manner that is sexually attractive to women. And I guess you could say they feel sexy.

But in my opinion, men are men and women are women, and we are very different creatures. And being the case, you can't make a man into a woman emotionally, nor can you make a woman into a man emotionally. Do you really want to be with a man who is a mirror of yourself emotionally?

 

[PapaDan]

FWIW, my guy is sexy as hell 24/7 and he knows it.

In the context of the OP's post, I don't think being sexy and feeling sexy is the same thing.

 

[jupija]

Hi TenchiKoi,
Does he have low T? Poor nourishment? Low self-esteem? I am older, but I feel sexy all the time, at least to some degree. Maybe being well-bathed, well-dressed, well-nourished would help in a Romantic evening? Nice that you care this much about him! That's love!

 

[AlexBailey]

I'm not sure I'm what you might call a gentleman , but...


'Sexy' is in the eyes of the beholder.

The word autogynephillia literally translates to self feminine love. It has been used by some to describe men who are aroused by feminizing themselves, but it also applies to women who are aroused by their own femininity.

The flipside of that term is autoandrophillia, which literally translates to self masculine love. I know men who are aroused by their own masculinity. I'm not sure how it correlates their sexuality...


I'm queer as fuck and find myself attracted to people of all sexes, including myself. Lol.

 

[TheShez]

Sexy

What makes me feel sexy and masculine is straight forward.
Well fitted clothes, a nice watch, my favourite boots. But most of all my wife smiling on my arm.

 

[welatshaw]

What makes me feel sexy?

Doing something forbidden or borderline taboo and getting away with it.

 

[Crownvic]

What makes you feel 'sexy'? I asked my guy this and he said he doesn't feel sexy. He just said if he sees the right visual input he likes he's ready to go. But that's just being turned on. Do guys ever feel sexy with themselves apart from outside stimulation? I'm just curious. Trying to help him be more in touch with his carnal side and not feel ashamed. Thanks for reading.

They feel sexy about themselves...when a female pays attention to them...in most cases..

 

[DWW]

Suit

I felt sexy when I had a nice well fitting suit on with a nice crisp shirt and power tie. I know that's not every woman's thing - but in the one company I had to wear a suit every day inside the office and while traveling - and the few times I had to wear a tux - it made me feel sexy rather than just horny.

I also felt sexy walking into a nice restaurant, dressed nicely, and feeling confident that I knew how to act. That was something I did not grow up with - in fact the opposite as my family thought Howard Johnson's was really a high-class restaurant when I grew up.

Now at my age and being just a year too young to get a Covid vaccine in my state - just getting up every day and feeling alive feels good. Sexy is kinda behind me these days.

 

[SimonDoom]

A few things:

Athletic accomplishments sometimes make me feel sexy, like doing well in a hard run or a long swim that pumps up my muscles all over my body.

The early phase of getting to know a woman and she says or does something that makes it obvious she is attracted.

I agree with others that clothes that fit just right can create a feeling of sexiness.

Probably most importantly, a sincere compliment from a partner.

 

[GinnyPPC]

Probably most importantly, a sincere compliment from a partner.

Regardless of gender or orientation, I think this is true for just about anybody.

 

[Primalex]

What makes you feel 'sexy'?

Getting a haircut

 

[nfrrdscnnr1]

My name and sexy just don't seem to go together very well. And, if you saw me, you'd probably see why. But aroused and willing to help my partner get cranked up? Yeah, that dog will hunt.

 

[jckontharocks]

I agree with the post workout comment!

The way my wife attacks my mouth with hers when we have sex. The way we kiss solidifies soulmates. It's a language we have that no one else speaks.

 

[jehoram]

Now that I think of it, I would have to say that I feel sexy when I touch and fondle my erection. I think all men do. It's what links us to our masculinity, ever since we were first capable of having one. If other partners also appreciate it, it's icing on the cake, but just having one and feeling it react to a touch is mighty reassuring. It doesn't have to lead to actual masturbation to orgasm.

I guess I should also flip the question: do women feel more sexy when they fondle their breasts or their pussies? Does it reassure them of their potential desirability?

 

[davion2308]

May this helps

I don't know if this helps but I feel sexy internally because I'm going on 40 and I still maintain a strong physique and body weight and I eat well and lift and run. I'm in good shape and I know it. That goes a long way.

The confidence, paired with attention, is what makes me feel sexy.

Getting attention from a woman, any woman, my wife or even a random woman or a neighbor smiling at me makes me feel good. I was shoveling snow yesterday and a neighbor was walking her dog across the street and I looked up and she was staring at me while I was shoveling. I busted her because she called a 'hello' and laughed at herself. That makes me feel good.

"A man is more interested in a woman who's interested in him than a woman, any woman, with great legs."

If you acknowledge him, touch his face and his arms and enter his space and give him your attention, he'll feel sexy.

Good luck!

 

[HappySpouse]

A lot of guys only feel desirable if they feel like someone else finds them sexy. The times I've felt most desirable were times a woman looked at me like I was desirable. I don't mean look at me like it's time for sex or like she is enjoying a sexual activity, but that just the sight of me caused that look out of the blue.

Women are more objectively beautiful than men. You don't have to be attracted to women to see that they are beautiful. Personally, I find male bodies off-putting. I see nothing sexually appealing or even visually pleasing about the square jaw and broad shoulders I find in the mirror. However, I can occasionally see something that my wife finds desirable and then it's back to the first line of my post.

I believe the vast majority of people are bisexual, and I've often wondered if that helps people see more attractiveness in themselves. I'm at the far end of that sliding scale and, to me, male sexiness is more of an abstract understanding of others feelings than anything I see myself.

 

[AllTheBetterNamesWereTaken]

1: Personal take on this

I... legit don't think I've ever felt "Sexy".
And like... I don't mean that in a bad way, or a good way, its like...

If I'm at a party, and I get the feeling a girl is noticing me, I don't feel sexy, I feel "aaahhh crap. No. Do not want."- because she's a stranger, and I'm not interested in her, and suddenly the interaction is going to be *weird*, because there's this other element to it. It feels bad, because suddenly the interaction is imbalanced by one person wanting one thing, and me... not wanting that thing. The opposite of sexy.

And on the flipside of that, if I'm with someone I know, someone I trust, and the candles are down low... there's a purr to her voice...
I don't feel "sexy", what I feel is connected. I feel warm. It's not a feeling about *me*, its a feeling about *us*- a feeling BETWEEN people.



2: More general

I think an important detail is that Society doesn't TELL men to value themselves based on how sexy they are. It tells them to value themselves based on how much sex they get, but that just means that they don't get the buzz from being noticed, they get the buzz from *getting the girl*.
it's not a "I feel sexy" its a "THAT GIRL is checking me out."
If a guy ever said "I feel sexy today", all his mates would tell him to fuck off.

(Also, society tells guys to be breadwinners, and a bunch of other shit, but just focusing on the idea of `being sexy' here).

 

[AlexanderBly]

What makes you feel 'sexy'? I asked my guy this and he said he doesn't feel sexy. He just said if he sees the right visual input he likes he's ready to go. But that's just being turned on. Do guys ever feel sexy with themselves apart from outside stimulation? I'm just curious. Trying to help him be more in touch with his carnal side and not feel ashamed. Thanks for reading.

I'm not sure men, myself included, feel "sexy" in the same sense as women. We may think we look good when we're out somewhere, but the rest of it is just a visual trigger. I throw on a t-shirt, a pair of jeans, some boots and a jacket and that's about it. I don't wear thigh-highs, have my eyebrows waxed, wear make-up, tight skirts or spend any time whatsoever buying lingerie for myself. So no. I don't ever feel "sexy." Just appealing to some.

 

[Night_Wolf]

Don't know if I have ever felt I was sexy; dressed in a tux for my younger sister's wedding & then as Best Man for a buddy, more than a few ladies, who knew me, said "you scrub up real nice" but I can't say that I felt "sexy" as such.

I've been told that I have "charisma" & one old fling told her sister (I have been with both & took the cherry of one) the scene in Roadhouse, where Patrick Swayze put the Dr up against the wall & fucked her, reminded her of me (no I don't look like him ) so I guess she thought I was sexy.

 

[n8Romantic]

What makes you feel 'sexy'? I asked my guy this and he said he doesn't feel sexy. He just said if he sees the right visual input he likes he's ready to go. But that's just being turned on. Do guys ever feel sexy with themselves apart from outside stimulation? I'm just curious. Trying to help him be more in touch with his carnal side and not feel ashamed. Thanks for reading.

You may have cracked the code on this and I appreciate your efforts in helping your man. I disagree a bit with some of my fellow male posters in that I believe men do feel sexy and opposed bring horny. Weight probably has the most influence of my feeling sexy or not. As my weight moves closer to the ideal, my close fit better and I feel better about myself. Throw in a good haircut and clothes that fit and I feel like a sexy dude.

Other posters have pointed out self esteem and confidence issues. These are complex issues that I believe require time and patience to overcome. You didn't mention age, but if your man is older, he might even unknowingly suffer from a very mild form of autism. That is more common than people think and can be a factor in hoe people view themselves and interact socially with others. I'm not a Doctor and am not in anyway making a diagnosis, just giving you something else to consider.

Good luck in your quest.

 

[uncle easy]

Feeling sexy

When a pretty, well built, mature ,woman comes on to me.