Breaking up with choking play is hard...

Domesticity said:

I always believe a man who tells me I'm too good for him. He isn't expressing insecurities, he's telling you the truth.

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Thegirl1987 said:

As said before, the sooner the better. If you are feeling very connected to him, but getting nothing from him. It may be in your best interest to walk away. There are plenty of men out there with the same sexual interests as you.

It sounds like he is looking for the sexual needs, not so much the emotional needs also. If you have tried to talk to him about all this and he seems to not understand or care, definitely walk away. Give yourself time, and move on then. In the long run, which every way it may go, you will be better for having that conversation.

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Domesticity said:

I always believe a man who tells me I'm too good for him. He isn't expressing insecurities, he's telling you the truth. Plenty of men like rough sex and many will love you as much as they love choking you. The band aid rip off (fast rather than slow) approach works best in situations like this.

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SpunThings said:

You can do this!

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song_bird said:

I'm dating a guy and we're engaging in a lot of choking, hitting, pain, and bruise play. Both of us are really getting off on it, but emotionally we're in different places. Since I also get off on the control and trust that I give him, my emotional reaction is much more intimate than his seems to be. He is not very forthcoming on his emotions.

He has also joked that he doesn't intend to date me for a long period of time. He laughs when I look upset at this and I don't know if he's just being a jerk or if he's laughing because he's uncomfortable.

I'm already pretty attached so I'm having a hard time telling myself to disconnect from our relationship. I also am afraid that I'll never meet someone who will actually like the same sexual intimacies as I do.

I would love to hear from other people who have successfully disengaged from situations like mine. Encouragement is appreciated!!

Edit to add: There are times when he's very tender. And times when he does open up a bit and comes across as being somewhat insecure as to why I like him so much. These moments make it extra hard, balancing out his sometimes caustic nature/humor. Re-reading my post makes it sound like it should be so very easy...

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petes478 said:

You're doing the right thing. Your post really cuts close to home as they say. I was in a relationship for four years. Although I was the male, I was much more emotionally invested than my ex girlfriend. I loved choking her and menacing her in our sex-play/rape-play. She loved it too but looking back I think she was doing some degree of it for me. It was a hard decision to end it and even harder to execute staying away, not calling, not emailing, etc. Its been a year now and I feel much better about the decision, about me, and feel my decision was the right one for both of us. You have my empathy and I am cheering you on. I feel certain, that many of us here on literotica have gone through what you are going through with this now. Anytime you want to talk, please PM me. I wish I didn't know how it feels, but I know how it feels. Warm compassionate "you are not alone" hugs.

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petes478 said:

You're doing the right thing. Your post really cuts close to home as they say. I was in a relationship for four years. Although I was the male, I was much more emotionally invested than my ex girlfriend. I loved choking her and menacing her in our sex-play/rape-play. She loved it too but looking back I think she was doing some degree of it for me. It was a hard decision to end it and even harder to execute staying away, not calling, not emailing, etc. Its been a year now and I feel much better about the decision, about me, and feel my decision was the right one for both of us. You have my empathy and I am cheering you on. I feel certain, that many of us here on literotica have gone through what you are going through with this now. Anytime you want to talk, please PM me. I wish I didn't know how it feels, but I know how it feels. Warm compassionate "you are not alone" hugs.

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