Old 04-10-2018, 01:32 AM   #1
Senna Jawa
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New/old haiku discussion

This thread is related to the Piscator's thread
New/old haiku thread
This time I am not saying A companion as I did in the past because I mean a more liberal assumption. The entries should relate to haiku from the Piscator's thread but these haiku could be also used as a pretext to present some ideas in general, it should be allowed. Thus, the haiku from the other thread would stimulate and organize our thinking here.

Last edited by Senna Jawa : 04-10-2018 at 01:34 AM. Reason: here
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Old 04-10-2018, 06:40 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Senna Jawa View Post
This thread is related to the Piscator's thread
New/old haiku thread
This time I am not saying A companion as I did in the past because I mean a more liberal assumption. The entries should relate to haiku from the Piscator's thread but these haiku could be also used as a pretext to present some ideas in general, it should be allowed. Thus, the haiku from the other thread would stimulate and organize our thinking here.
Good idea SJ. I to find that discussion in between poems breaks to flow.

However the General Commentary thread fulfills much the same function and its revival could serve for other threads as well.
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Old 04-10-2018, 06:52 PM   #3
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the General Commentary thread fulfills much the same function
Piscator, I don't think so, not at all.

For instance, here we can talk about the poetic gain from giving up on 5-7-5, and we could illustrate this on the haiku from your haiku thread.

This is a place to talk specifically about haiku, and not in hm-general.
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Old 04-12-2018, 04:34 AM   #4
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Justice, fate, ...

Haiku is supposed to be suggestive, meaning that it should allow for READERS' interpretations, perhaps for more than one. Of course, first of all, it should be an image.

Thus my haiku dedicated to Roy Zornov had a pure vivid image, full of suspension, and NO sickening garbage talk nor stupid opinions, and my haiku let READERs think about justice and fate. Thus it was a true haiku.

In Piscator's thread, he himself has provided a nice thematic extension C.J.Miles. I am curious, is C.J Miles the author? (S/he's not the title of this piece, is s/he? ). Who is C.J.Miles, and when was this haiku written, I would like to know the date.

Is "Bb" a typo? I am afraid that it is not, that it was meant to be like this.

If this is a technical term then I would not feel that it's contributing poetically--perhaps it's obvious that it does not. Perhaps, I am sure, Bball is short for basketball ball. It achieves that (un)holy 7th syllable. Is it really worth it to torture a poem like this, just for that religious 7th syllable?

What is this Piscator's follow up haiku about? I'd say that it is about perfectness and the satisfaction. Whoever played basketball and scored cleanly must feel some kind of heavenly satisfaction. Even fans must feel this way.

While the issue of forcing 5-7-5 is blatant (e.g. the nothing word nothing) I do have also one subtle doubt, it's about word quick. This post is already long enough though.

Thank you Piscator, regards,

Last edited by Senna Jawa : 04-12-2018 at 05:05 AM.
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Old 04-12-2018, 10:15 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Senna Jawa View Post
Haiku is supposed to be suggestive, meaning that it should allow for READERS' interpretations, perhaps for more than one. Of course, first of all, it should be an image.

Thus my haiku dedicated to Roy Zornov had a pure vivid image, full of suspension, and NO sickening garbage talk nor stupid opinions, and my haiku let READERs think about justice and fate. Thus it was a true haiku.

In Piscator's thread, he himself has provided a nice thematic extension C.J.Miles. I am curious, is C.J Miles the author? (S/he's not the title of this piece, is s/he? ). Who is C.J.Miles, and when was this haiku written, I would like to know the date.

Is "Bb" a typo? I am afraid that it is not, that it was meant to be like this. N
If this is a technical term then I would not feel that it's contributing poetically--perhaps it's obvious that it does not. Perhaps, I am sure, Bball is short for basketball ball. It achieves that (un)holy 7th syllable. Is it really worth it to torture a poem like this, just for that religious 7th syllable?

What is this Piscator's follow up haiku about? I'd say that it is about perfectness and the satisfaction. Whoever played basketball and scored cleanly must feel some kind of heavenly satisfaction. Even fans must feel this way.

While the issue of forcing 5-7-5 is blatant (e.g. the nothing word nothing) I do have also one subtle doubt, it's about word quick. This post is already long enough though.

Thank you Piscator, regards,
Thanks Senna Jawa,

Yes Bball is short for basketball. No torture was intended.

I don't know of Roy Zornov but your haiku read like an homage to that moment of indecision when the ball teeters on edge then misses the net.

C.J. Miles is a small forward for the Toronto Raptors, my team in the NBA. He came to the team this year for his ability to shoot the three point shot. Sometimes he is very good - other times not.

My haiku tried to capture the Zen moment when time slows down and training, position, teamwork and talent all combine for the perfect shot.

Cheers

P'tor
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