DVS Inspired Asshole Chatter

Ok, so this might not be what you think

DVS recently made comments regarding a sweet, tight 60 year old asshole. So how does one engage in ass play and still take care of their chocolate starfish? Are there kegel type exercises that can be done? Ass-centric aftercare? Products, techniques... what's out there in the way of caring for your ass?
Mine is in good shape, and I really want to both use it and keep it that way. As someone so eloquently noted, I do not want to end up in the "Pink Sock Club"
I am interested in hearing about caring for your ass both with toy play, and intercourse, if there is a difference (given that toys can tend to stay in your ass for longer periods of time). All info and experiences welcome.
Thanks!

Anal Pleasure & Health by Jack Morin PhD.

If you're a nerdy research/ curious type, it's the best thing out there.

CutieMouse said:

Anal Pleasure & Health by Jack Morin PhD.

If you're a nerdy research/ curious type, it's the best thing out there.

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I just bought a copy, thanks!

I have that book!

So share some of its bountiful knowledge? Because I cannot buy it at the moment...

Collar_N_Cuffs said:

So share some of its bountiful knowledge? Because I cannot buy it at the moment...

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It's been several years since I read it. Ummm...

#1 rule - numbing lubes are bad
#2 rule - pain is information
#3 rule - there is no such thing as too much lube
#4 rule - for the love of god, go slow

A lot of anal, is actually mental. It's common for people to fear anal (OMG it's going to hurt! OMG it's going to be messy! etc), Fear = tension; tension - pain.

The best part of the book that stuck with me, was a series of "exercises" to work through the [mental; physical] taboo associated with the anus. I think he suggested spending time every day "exploring" - massage, fingering, learning to form positive associations with anal touch, etc.

There was also quite a bit of information about enemas (necessary or not; if desired, how to do them safely), how diet impacts anal health, how to safely explore anal sex. etc.

Thanks CM - I plan to get the book when I am able, and appreciate your sharing.

Surely there must also be some... Whatever you do, stay away from this... type stories out there. Share?!

CutieMouse said:

#3 rule - there is no such thing as too much lube

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This is something you hear a lot, but at least for me, personally, there is a thing as too much lube. I've noticed that too much of it leads to stomach cramps and BMs not quite like they normally would be. There seems to be no difference whether I use silicone or water based lube, jelly, runny, whatever. If there's too much of it, I feel horrible afterwards.

I never have problems like that if I use lube in moderation (or not at all).

ETA: At some point I thought it might be because more lube = easier to pound too hard = more aftereffects, but further experiments have proved that assumption false. The only explanation I've figured out is the amount of lube.

seela said:

This is something you hear a lot, but at least for me, personally, there is a thing as too much lube. I've noticed that too much of it leads to stomach cramps and BMs not quite like they normally would be. There seems to be no difference whether I use silicone or water based lube, jelly, runny, whatever. If there's too much of it, I feel horrible afterwards.

I never have problems like that if I use lube in moderation (or not at all).

ETA: At some point I thought it might be because more lube = easier to pound too hard = more aftereffects, but further experiments have proved that assumption false. The only explanation I've figured out is the amount of lube.

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This is my experience too.

From a health stand point, as PSW's we are taught not to use anything but water based lubes for insertion. Thankfully this has always been the norm for any kind of play regardless.

That being said, I am in the same camp as "too much CAN be a bad thing" in regards to lubrication. My issue isn't with cramping - I haven't experienced that thankfully - but like vaginal sex, once things get messy from too much wetness, I miss the necessary friction. Plus my brain switches from "oh, this is sexy fun" to "oh no, it sounds AWFUL".

I believe that there is a "right amount" of lube and it's to be found with experimentation. (always water based, preferably made by hippies from inert type things)

I sometimes enjoy this on the receptive end, and let me tell you, if there's NO friction it is a bad bad time for me. Just - ew. Enough lube is enough lube for some people.

In my experience...

Anal kegels are just as important as vaginal kegels. Due to a complicated hysterectomy over ten years ago I had pelvic physical therapy using bio-feedback using both vaginal and anal probes. Learning how to tighten and completely relax those muscle is very helpful sexually and for overall health.

I would also recommend anyone who has had more than one sexual partner and has had anal sex or plays with anal toys to ask for anal Pap smear with HPV testing. I work in a hospital and have seen too many cases of anal cancer in patients ages 30-70. Anal cancer is very slow growing. Like cervical cancer if pre-cancerous lesions are caught early many times cancer mortality can be prevented. The tests are not not routinely and many doctors will say it is not needed. But I would recommend them especially if you have ever had a positive cervical Pap or genital( or anal) warts.

When I posted my original question, I honestly didn't know that anal kegels existed! Excellent advice, all. And thank you for the medical information as well.
Any more info or experience out there, please share.
Thanks

ecstaticsub said:

In my experience...

Anal kegels are just as important as vaginal kegels. Due to a complicated hysterectomy over ten years ago I had pelvic physical therapy using bio-feedback using both vaginal and anal probes. Learning how to tighten and completely relax those muscle is very helpful sexually and for overall health.

I would also recommend anyone who has had more than one sexual partner and has had anal sex or plays with anal toys to ask for anal Pap smear with HPV testing. I work in a hospital and have seen too many cases of anal cancer in patients ages 30-70. Anal cancer is very slow growing. Like cervical cancer if pre-cancerous lesions are caught early many times cancer mortality can be prevented. The tests are not not routinely and many doctors will say it is not needed. But I would recommend them especially if you have ever had a positive cervical Pap or genital( or anal) warts.

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Well SHIT I didn't even think of that. ANOTHER thing to chat with once I find a gyne over here for my very-much-over-do check up.

(I had pre-cancerous lesions about a year ago they did not remove because they were improving on their own. Which kinda peeved me off because I'm surgically minded and lesion=cutthatshitout. but that's a whole other conversation)

Anyone out there with experience to share regarding use of toys? Dos and donts? I'm wondering specifically if leaving a butt plug in for prolonged periods (like a few hours) is harmful. Thanks!

Collar_N_Cuffs said:

Anyone out there with experience to share regarding use of toys? Dos and donts? I'm wondering specifically if leaving a butt plug in for prolonged periods (like a few hours) is harmful. Thanks!

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Since the title of this thread has my name in it, I feel obligated to post. But, all I can add to the discussion is common sense. The term "there is no such thing as too much lube" is just something to help you remember that you should use a sufficient amount of lube. It says too much lube isn't bad, because not enough lube usually is bad. I know some people have different opinions and like in everything else, your mileage may vary. Personally, I prefer to say "use enough lube", but to an inexperienced player, that really doesn't tell them anything. The best thing to do is use more than you think you need until the time comes when you both decide when enough is enough. Yes, I said both. This isn't a dom decision. The submissive has an equal vote because they know first hand what it feels like.

If there is any pain, that's usually a sign of not enough lube, or of going too fast. Some people have a difficult time relaxing and that can cause pain, too. If someone can't relax and their partner gets too quick with the action, that can also cause pain. There are times when a lot of lube will suffice when someone can't relax, but it's not a good thing to get into a hurry, especially when you are just starting out with this. Like any new experience, you need to start slow.

Not enough lube usually results in too much friction which can cause abrasions or scratches inside the anal canal. That inner wall of tissue is very sensitive and any scratch or abrasion can end up taking a long and painful time to heal. And with the type of bacteria that frequents that area, healing can also be difficult.

Hemorrhoids are also a problem for some people. Some people are just susceptible to them and when they are within the area that will receive contact from the anal act, they can become inflamed and even end up infected. It's best to pick a time when there isn't any kind of break in the skin or surrounding tissue, or you will likely make what ever is there become worse.

Take care of your toys. This is a favorite toy of mine. It's stupid to assume one's anus doesn't need to be cared for, just like any other bodily orifice...or toy. The anal sphincter is a muscle and it can be kept healthy. The tissue inside the anal canal is very tender and easily damaged. I listen to my partner. If she says she doesn't want any anal, I have to respect that. She knows her body.

In another thread I made the comment that I had recently experienced a 60 year old's tight anus and somebody seemed to think that was unlikely. But, it's true. Maybe I'm lucky, but once someone is in their 60s, it isn't the end of sex. Everybody take care of your body and you'll be having kinky sex in your 60s, too.

Riles said:

That being said, I am in the same camp as "too much CAN be a bad thing" in regards to lubrication. My issue isn't with cramping - I haven't experienced that thankfully - but like vaginal sex, once things get messy from too much wetness, I miss the necessary friction. Plus my brain switches from "oh, this is sexy fun" to "oh no, it sounds AWFUL".

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Yikes!

I think this comment may have killed any curiosity I had about anal.

Endless_Night said:

Yikes!

I think this comment may have killed any curiosity I had about anal.

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lol

It's not what you are thinking, it was in reference to too much lubrication and that...uh, squishing sound that happens. However, you have to consider that with two bodies colliding, all kinds of potential noises, misalignments, fumbles, falling objects, etc are bound to happen from time to time and you can either embrace the moment and have a giggle with your partner ( that's always an interesting sensation from inside ) or you can let it ruin the experience by embarrassment.

It's worth noting though that I have never encountered a man who wasn't more focused on the stimulation and sensation of the act then he was the potential sounds resulting from that act. Guys just don't care in the moment....and really, depending on your age and experience with life, you just roll with these things.

Riles said:

lol

It's not what you are thinking, it was in reference to too much lubrication and that...uh, squishing sound that happens. However, you have to consider that with two bodies colliding, all kinds of potential noises, misalignments, fumbles, falling objects, etc are bound to happen from time to time and you can either embrace the moment and have a giggle with your partner ( that's always an interesting sensation from inside ) or you can let it ruin the experience by embarrassment.

It's worth noting though that I have never encountered a man who wasn't more focused on the stimulation and sensation of the act then he was the potential sounds resulting from that act. Guys just don't care in the moment....and really, depending on your age and experience with life, you just roll with these things.

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Yes, a generous helping of ability to laugh at self is at least as helpful as lube.

In another thread I made the comment that I had recently experienced a 60 year old's tight anus and somebody seemed to think that was unlikely. But, it's true. Maybe I'm lucky, but once someone is in their 60s, it isn't the end of sex. Everybody take care of your body and you'll be having kinky sex in your 60s, too.

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After menopause a lady's asshole may work much better than her vagina. Vags are hormonally supported-- butts not so much.

Riles said:

lol

It's not what you are thinking, it was in reference to too much lubrication and that...uh, squishing sound that happens. However, you have to consider that with two bodies colliding, all kinds of potential noises, misalignments, fumbles, falling objects, etc are bound to happen from time to time and you can either embrace the moment and have a giggle with your partner ( that's always an interesting sensation from inside ) or you can let it ruin the experience by embarrassment.

It's worth noting though that I have never encountered a man who wasn't more focused on the stimulation and sensation of the act then he was the potential sounds resulting from that act. Guys just don't care in the moment....and really, depending on your age and experience with life, you just roll with these things.

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Noises come from all sorts of places. In missionary position if Mister's chest hits my chest a certain way it makes an armpit fart noise. In the heat of the moment we don't care, afterwards we have a chuckle.

ｖ（＾＿＾ｖ）♪

Just saying I agree.

MeekMe said:

Noises come from all sorts of places. In missionary position if Mister's chest hits my chest a certain way it makes an armpit fart noise. In the heat of the moment we don't care, afterwards we have a chuckle.

ｖ（＾＿＾ｖ）♪

Just saying I agree.

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lol


The image or aural memory this inspires is worth a giggle/laugh of it's own.

Asshole chatter? Is that suppose to be a cute name for a fart?

DVS said:

Asshole chatter? Is that suppose to be a cute name for a fart?

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It's a sound I can imagine-- but I can't imagine ever actually hearing. Whose asshole could *chatter?*

Stella_Omega said:

It's a sound I can imagine-- but I can't imagine ever actually hearing. Whose asshole could *chatter?*

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http://www.mrmethane.com/.