Your best or your worst PM or IM opening lines... and if you want your reactions ...

[RedHairedandFriendly]

I'm in no way racist so ill asterik out enough so you get the idea.

I received the following from a supposed sub that wanted me as her domme...

"will you take me down to ni***rville so you can whore me out to all your black friends for cash?" "how many friends do you have?"

I pissed my pants with that one.

Evening sepher. Nice to see ya.

I should have randomly PM'd Doms. lol. . . never thought about it, thought of taking out an ad though before. LOL.

My responses for most PM's is a link to this thread. I've actually had one PMer respond here in the thread and let people know who they were. LOL.... the UK gentlemen I know were apologizing for his behavior. . .that was sweet.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

lol...I was too shocked to respond...so I let it go for a day and I get a reply...

"I'm surprised I haven't heard from you. I know, you're writing me a story about ni***r fucking, let me help...just start off slow, it can be little blurbs and I can chime in"

she continued on having a conversation to herself...it mustve been enjoyable company

*giggles* I'm sure it was fascinating.

 

[All_Woman]

lol...I was too shocked to respond...so I let it go for a day and I get a reply...

"I'm surprised I haven't heard from you. I know, you're writing me a story about ni***r fucking, let me help...just start off slow, it can be little blurbs and I can chime in"

she continued on having a conversation to herself...it mustve been enjoyable company

LOL.. hey never know you might have enjoyed it..

 

[All_Woman]

LOL. Welcome back, hope your evening is going well.

Thanks Red. Hope yours is as well. Actually stuck indoors here as its one of those rainy day Monday's.

 

[sepher8125]

pimp

LOL.. hey never know you might have enjoyed it..

my dreams of being a pimp can finally come true!

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Thanks Red. Hope yours is as well. Actually stuck indoors here as its one of those rainy day Monday's.

You're welcome. Yes, it has been that way all day here.

 

[All_Woman]

my dreams of being a pimp can finally come true!

Go for it. She might even make ya rich... LOL

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

I blocked him before I copied our convo. . .but. . .

Why if I knew a person and had chatted with him before. . .would he give me his asl as the opening line as soon as I long onto yahoo. . .

Then upon me humoring him and giving him my asl. . . He asks if I'm horny.

I tell him no and explain if I was I would spend that time with someone who already knew me. . .

then he claims the "we have chatted before"

BULLSHIT!

*rollseyes*

So as I'm typing my witty response, because you know I'm going to have one. . .

He sends me... want my pic?

*sigh*

So this gets another witty response and a have a good day and see ya later. . .BLOCKED!

 

[keiffers]

my IM to red would be "will you please whip me with your wet noodle"

heheh

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

my IM to red would be "will you please whip me with your wet noodle"

heheh

Hahaha!

 

[keiffers]

Hahaha!

then again I know the secret to getting you horny - but I refuse to share with anyone!!!! lol

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

then again I know the secret to getting you horny - but I refuse to share with anyone!!!! lol

I'm sure you wouldn't.

 

[keiffers]

I'm sure you wouldn't.

well just don't cross me LOL then I might be forced to share the secret with all the perv freaks LOL

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

well just don't cross me LOL then I might be forced to share the secret with all the perv freaks LOL

 

[Diamond_Girl]

I received this PM yesterday from a female. It wouldn't've been so bad, but she'd PMed my alt at one point, too.

i am very eager to get myself noticed on this site in a very big way. i would like to do an entire posting on two hot chicks that go down on each other for the first time. i would like to include some pics, videos and in depth descriptions and you are the one i want to do this with because i have been turned on by you from the first time i read your posts. i will pay for all travel arrangements and make sure you are very well taken care of so are you interested?

My reply...

I'm flattered that you'd consider me for this, but this isn't really something I'm interested in doing. Thanks for the offer, though.

Polite, but assertive. I thought that'd be it, but no. Got a reply.

the truth is i am very shy with girls - i have only fucked and sucked guys and desparately want to taste my first pussy. i find you sooooooooo hot. i would do ANYTHING if you were my first.... PLEASE ...i'm begging

I replied again.

Again, I appreciate the offer, but no thanks. I don't have the time from work to travel right now. Besides, I have a bi friend who'd be extremely hurt if I had my first lesbian encounter with anyone else but her. I'm sorry. Good luck in finding someone to do this with you!

You'd think that'd be the end of it. After all, I've had guys give up by this point. But alas, no.

how about this - i am kinda turned on by YOU and would love to taste you and have you taste me but since you are not open to that would you get me off by phone at least? maybe the sound of your voice helping me finger fuck myself would be good for me to try

I'm hoping that she gets a clue with my last reply:

I'm not interested. You may have more luck over on the GLBT forum. Please don't PM me again.

Geesh! Even Dusky was getting pissed off by her persistence and offered to intervene for me. However, I've dealt with this chick before, and she then offered to fuck my then boyfriend in front of me and let me eat their come out of her. He wasn't interested, either.

 

[kendra1980]

My all time 'most interesting' pm, came from a man who sent me a link to a picture of his hard cock, with the words "Just think how your lips would look wrapped around this." That's all it said. He was huge. Its a wonder he would walk erect carrying that around with him all the time.

Well, I did think about how my lips would look wrapped around it, and wrote him back and said...

"I've thought about it and after due consideration, I am afraid I'd disappoint, as I don't think my lips will fit around it. I don't know many women whose would!!! Thanks for the invite, but I'll have to decline."

He wrote me back to ask me what color lipstick prints I'd leave around it. Ummm, NONE. I finally blocked him, he was pretty insistent!!!

I was also approached for a threesome, on my 2nd day on lit, which was a bit shocking. Both parties writing me. As someone very new to lit, that was a bit of a shock!

I always try to be nice when replying, but if they persist - and I had one creepy 'stalker' type incident (be careful out there) - I am ever thankful for the block ability on the pm's.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Geesh! Even Dusky was getting pissed off by her persistence and offered to intervene for me. However, I've dealt with this chick before, and she then offered to fuck my then boyfriend in front of me and let me eat their come out of her. He wasn't interested, either.

I'm sorry you experienced that.

I've had to be rude with women too. It isn't a pleasant experience one way or another. Women can send PM's too, that are strickly for getting off. I have a repeat emailer that is constantly biraging me with emails. I've never responded after the first. . .I'm not interested, thank you, but they keep sending them. *sigh*

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

My all time 'most interesting' pm, came from a man who sent me a link to a picture of his hard cock, with the words "Just think how your lips would look wrapped around this." That's all it said. He was huge. Its a wonder he would walk erect carrying that around with him all the time.

Well, I did think about how my lips would look wrapped around it, and wrote him back and said...

"I've thought about it and after due consideration, I am afraid I'd disappoint, as I don't think my lips will fit around it. I don't know many women whose would!!! Thanks for the invite, but I'll have to decline."

He wrote me back to ask me what color lipstick prints I'd leave around it. Ummm, NONE. I finally blocked him, he was pretty insistent!!!

I was also approached for a threesome, on my 2nd day on lit, which was a bit shocking. Both parties writing me. As someone very new to lit, that was a bit of a shock!

I always try to be nice when replying, but if they persist - and I had one creepy 'stalker' type incident (be careful out there) - I am ever thankful for the block ability on the pm's.

I'd like to say Welcome to Lit. That's about the typical greeting you'll get for a while till you've posted a lot, and then they may slow down, (no promises).

Ignore is a wonderful tool. . .it is your friend, use it wisely.

Nice to meet you ~ Red.

 

[kendra1980]

I'd like to say Welcome to Lit. That's about the typical greeting you'll get for a while till you've posted a lot, and then they may slow down, (no promises).

Ignore is a wonderful tool. . .it is your friend, use it wisely.

Nice to meet you ~ Red.

Red,
Nice to meet you as well. I am also red haired, and I think, pretty friendly

Its already slowed down, thanks in large part to Denali, my sig/profile page, and prolific postings in regard to him!

Good advice on the ignore option!!!

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Red,
Nice to meet you as well. I am also red haired, and I think, pretty friendly

Its already slowed down, thanks in large part to Denali, my sig/profile page, and prolific postings in regard to him!

Good advice on the ignore option!!!

Mine slowed down a lot when I started this thread.

 

[Guest]

XXXXXX had to say you have such a bloody amazing ass, gonna go (medical details not appropriate to reveal here) and see if I can manage a wank thinking of you babe.
Luv yah

I could have taken offence at this but as it came from a very very dear friend who has been very poorly it just made me smile broadly.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

I could have taken offence at this but as it came from a very very dear friend who has been very poorly it just made me smile broadly.

*giggles* I need friends like that.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

OMG. . . He doesn't think too highly of himself does he? ? ? Is this an Infomercial?

Hello, you very lovely ladie. I'm wantin' to let you know of a special
chance right now to get some very, VERY, VEEERRRRY great lovin' 'n'
strokin' right now. Who I'm typin' about is one serious night ....
mornin', 'n' a lil' bit a after noon too, type of experience, giver. I was
told on three different occasions about " how f__bleep__g great a session
it was." He just keeps on and on and on and on strokin' it. 'N' that's
straight to me, outta THREE different ladies mouths. 'N' Apparently, I
was told, that they all, were very luckily, for him aaAAaaand for them.
'Cause they needed to preform after they had reached a level of
Complete Sastification, that, I was told, combined, 'n' an average, of
happiness from the ladies. Was generally two weeks, maybe a lil' longer after
said sessions. 'N' that they just couldn't get rid of the, then after
affects glow. You know how it is. A night .... 'n' morning, followed by
at least, by a few hours in some up comin' ;-D after noon. to endulge
in his Sastifyin' strokin'. Please, get a hold a me, the BOLD letters
are the ones you wanna pay attention to, at. AKNATIVE--, circle around
the A button, at the COMputer CASTratin' guys. the ones that DOT their
NETs. Cool. Later.

 

[Diamond_Girl]

OMG. . . He doesn't think too highly of himself does he? ? ? Is this an Infomercial?

Hello, you very lovely ladie. I'm wantin' to let you know of a special
chance right now to get some very, VERY, VEEERRRRY great lovin' 'n'
strokin' right now. Who I'm typin' about is one serious night ....
mornin', 'n' a lil' bit a after noon too, type of experience, giver. I was
told on three different occasions about " how f__bleep__g great a session
it was." He just keeps on and on and on and on strokin' it. 'N' that's
straight to me, outta THREE different ladies mouths. 'N' Apparently, I
was told, that they all, were very luckily, for him aaAAaaand for them.
'Cause they needed to preform after they had reached a level of
Complete Sastification, that, I was told, combined, 'n' an average, of
happiness from the ladies. Was generally two weeks, maybe a lil' longer after
said sessions. 'N' that they just couldn't get rid of the, then after
affects glow. You know how it is. A night .... 'n' morning, followed by
at least, by a few hours in some up comin' ;-D after noon. to endulge
in his Sastifyin' strokin'. Please, get a hold a me, the BOLD letters
are the ones you wanna pay attention to, at. AKNATIVE--, circle around
the A button, at the COMputer CASTratin' guys. the ones that DOT their
NETs. Cool. Later.

OMGosh! That's too damn funny! I should go back and edit my "what made you smile today" post to include this. I at least appreciate a level of intelligence. The spelling and grammar is so bad, it was difficult to read through.

 

[Guest]

OMG. . . He doesn't think too highly of himself does he? ? ? Is this an Infomercial?

Hello, you very lovely ladie. I'm wantin' to let you know of a special
chance right now to get some very, VERY, VEEERRRRY great lovin' 'n'
strokin' right now. Who I'm typin' about is one serious night ....
mornin', 'n' a lil' bit a after noon too, type of experience, giver. I was
told on three different occasions about " how f__bleep__g great a session
it was." He just keeps on and on and on and on strokin' it. 'N' that's
straight to me, outta THREE different ladies mouths. 'N' Apparently, I
was told, that they all, were very luckily, for him aaAAaaand for them.
'Cause they needed to preform after they had reached a level of
Complete Sastification, that, I was told, combined, 'n' an average, of
happiness from the ladies. Was generally two weeks, maybe a lil' longer after
said sessions. 'N' that they just couldn't get rid of the, then after
affects glow. You know how it is. A night .... 'n' morning, followed by
at least, by a few hours in some up comin' ;-D after noon. to endulge
in his Sastifyin' strokin'. Please, get a hold a me, the BOLD letters
are the ones you wanna pay attention to, at. AKNATIVE--, circle around
the A button, at the COMputer CASTratin' guys. the ones that DOT their
NETs. Cool. Later.

OMGosh! That's too damn funny! I should go back and edit my "what made you smile today" post to include this. I at least appreciate a level of intelligence. The spelling and grammar is so bad, it was difficult to read through.

Sorry, it isn't funny, but that's probably because I didn't manage to get past the first couple of lines!!!

Well done Red & DG for being able to read the trash!!