Women - what if your SO came on your face while you were sleep?

[Ms_Lilith]

I would leave him.

I have an absolute hard limit about facial cum shots. I will NOT allow it. So if he went behind my back and did it while I wasn't even conscious, I could not get past that betrayal.

 

[ReadyOne]

The worst I can compare this to is perhaps having a cold ice cube run down your back -- nothing to cause a divorce!

(Or should I compare it to having warn water poured over your pee-pee...)

 

[angela146]

Maybe it's just because I've been married for awhile, but as long as it didn't stop my breathing, my initial thought would be, " What, are all the towels in the laundry?"

Am I really the only one who sees the humor in this idea?

No, you aren't the only one. But you and I (and some of the others who think it might be fun) are in long term stable trusting relationships. After ten years you start looking for wierd stuff to do with each other.

Oh, and my reaction will probably be to rub my face all over his, trying to make sure I get some of it in his hair. Then I'd expect him to lick the rest of if off of me.

 

[angela146]

(Or should I compare it to having warn water poured over your pee-pee...)

Who gets to sleep in the wet spot?

 

[Tooch McGroin]

No I haven't forgotten that a minority of women seem to think this is ok.

A minority? There are at least 6 women posting to this thread who think it's ok. How many women posting to this thread think it's NOT ok?

Count again.

 

[SexyChele]

And yet Chele you must remember that this board hosts an international set of members, and in some countries women are oppressed as a matter of routine. Even in some westernized nations once a woman marries she's expected to bow to the wishes of her husband.

<SNIP> et al

Bobmi, I was responding to this Tooch person and, if he has entered his location as to where he actually lives, it is Chicago. That's US. Quite a different thing. The post you responded to was not to Kardon, who I think likes to come up with topics that provoke than run away and watch the ruckus. Sort of like an arsonist. After all, look at the type of topics he has started...

 

[SexyChele]

I think you're wrong. I am not missing your points. catalina_francisco, Italian Goddess , and Latinababe are all women and they don't mind this stuff. On the contrary, they think it's kind of hot.

Perhap you, and and a few others like yourself on this thread, find this idea so objectionable for other reasons. For instance, maybe your lover isn't suave or sexy but sort of a jerk, or maybe you're a male-hating dyke, or maybe you're a domineering type who resents any man playing around with you.

In any case, I'm gonna win this one because unlike you ladies, I will go the distance. I have stamina. And I will cum on all your faces.

Ya know? I was going to give you the benefit of the doubt - being a newbie and all. But you're here a week and a half, know absolutely no one, make foundless judgemental statements, and expect to be taken seriously?

You are an ass.

Not worthy of time.

Certainly not mine.

 

[Tooch McGroin]

Ya know? I was going to give you the benefit of the doubt - being a newbie and all. But you're here a week and a half, know absolutely no one, make foundless judgemental statements, and expect to be taken seriously?

You are an ass.

Not worthy of time.

Certainly not mine.

I don't need to know anyone on this board to post my opinions and comments. But the fact is, I have several friends on this board who invited me to participate. I made no judgements in the post you're referring to. If you would look closely, and read carefully, you'll notice that I only speculated on the cause of such intolerant hostility.

You're the one who invoked the infamous name of Lorena Bobbit, as if she's some heroine of yours. You seem to think that genital mutilation is an appropirate response to kardon's suggested activity. That's sick and twisted.

Anyway, I don't expect to be taken seriously by someone like you. My expectations of wannabe cock mutilators is quite low.

 

[Ziggy*stardust]

I wouldn’t be angry or anything, just really surprised because it’s so unlike anything my husband would do. If he would do it, I wouldn’t mind though. Can’t really say the thought excites me but it doesn’t repulse me or makes me angry either.

I agree with other posters that you should discuss this with her first because she might not have the same feelings about this as I have. lol

stardust

 

[pw27]

I would be highly pissed if hubs did this to me while sleeping, I don't like it while awake. Come on my face isn't my thing but anywhere else is fine. I'd probably punch him in the balls or the eye.

 

[Alyx]

I take my sleep very seriously. I get very grouchy when woke up before I’m ready (except in emergencies). If my husband did this to me, I’d be pissed off. To me, it screams of a lack of respect. When I give my husband a blowjob, if he wanted to cum on my face, I wouldn’t mind in the least, though he seems to prefer me swallowing. He’s waked me up to have sex in the past. And while I’m a little grouchy in the beginning, that usually doesn’t last long. If he suddenly felt an over powering need to splash spooge on my face some night, I would expect him to wake me up FIRST. Otherwise, he’s liable to find himself waking up one night after I’ve cracked a raw egg open on his face, just to see HIS reaction.

Everyone’s different. I don’t happen to enjoy this sort of thing, but more power to you if you do. What I don’t understand is what everyone is arguing over. I read the comments about removing a husband’s balls/dick/etc. for doing this sort of thing as an exaggeration. A way of speaking in words (not actions) of how pissed off you’d be. No one is going to change the mind/tastes of others, no matter how much you complain or insult each other. We should be celebrating the differences on this board, not insulting each other over them (and yes, that includes me!). These boards would be pretty damn boring if we all agreed, don’t you think?

One cautionary note: Being hit in the balls after doing something like this to an unsuspecting partner IS a real possibility. If you’re going to come on her face, she’s probably going to jerk awake from being startled and may very well hit you in the balls when she reaches up to her face. She mayl feel sorry for doing so, or you may get a reply of “You should have known better!” One would assume that you'd know your partner well enough in the beginning that you'd know which reaction to expect!

~Alyx~

 

[sweetnpetite]

Here's an idea. Why don't you try mentioning it to her ahead of time to find her opinion on it.
This could be done in a number of ways.

Example:
"hey baby my friend Bob came all over his girlfriends face last night while she was sleeping"

Then listen to her reaction. If her reaction is "gross how degrading" I would suggest not trying it....

I was thinking something similer to this- such as saying that I read it in a lit story, penthouse letter ect, or saw it in a porno flick (years ago, before I met you- can't remember what it was called)

 

[sweetnpetite]

Wow, your kidding right?

A woman *always* reserves the right to say no. (unless she had explicitly offered in all serious to be your slave). Doesn't matter how much you love her or she loves you, you can't just 'take her' whenever you want.

Honest to god, this could be considered sexual assult. It is NOT suprise sex. Its taking advantage.

Supose a guy has a rape fantasy and decides to act it out without discussing it with her? Or he wants to tie her up but she's not into it so he hancuffs her to the bed while she's sleeping and wakes her up with a slap?

Relatioinships are about the terms you set between the two of you, and if you have a set up were she has agreed to accept whatever you do to her, consentual or not- then you probably don't need to ask the question. Even then, you run a risk any time you awaken someone suddenly and rudely and with your genitals exposed. If someone threw water on me while I was sleeping, I'd likely have them half way killed before I was all the way awake.

Even husbands can be found guilty of rape. You don't 'suprise' someone you love with sex by doing things to them when they are unconcious. (UNless you are *damn* sure that it's something she wants- and even then it's risky)

And yes, it is a violation of our body *and* our soul.

A break? Ok, where do you want it?

Damn, you're violent. If a woman planted her pussy on my sleeping face while I slept, without my consent, I wouldn't kill her for it. You might need anger management classes.

A violation of your body and soul? How dramatic.

We're not talking about sneaking into a woman's house and fucking her face while she sleeps. We're talking about surprise sex with your loving partner. Why the need for violence? I disagree with your assumption that most women would respond with such harsh violence against their lovers.

 

[angela146]

Relatioinships are about the terms you set between the two of you, and if you have a set up were she has agreed to accept whatever you do to her, consentual or not- then you probably don't need to ask the question.

Even husbands can be found guilty of rape. You don't 'suprise' someone you love with sex by doing things to them when they are unconcious. (UNless you are *damn* sure that it's something she wants- and even then it's risky)

And yes, it is a violation of our body *and* our soul.

Actually, surprizing a spouse with sex when they are asleep is one of most pleasureable and intimate things married folks can do.

But it the kind of thing that develops over the years between people who intend to grow old with each other and have already started doing it (growing old that is).

My husband and I sometimes wake each other up with sex. Yes, I really do sometimes wake up with him on top of me and preparing to enter me. More often I wake up with his hand between my legs and his lips on gently touching mine.

He sometimes wakes up with me going down on him. (I'm not coordinated enough to mount him without waking him up).

There is a really incredible moment when I'm half awake and realize that my body is already excited because he has been touching me for a while while I slept.

There is also a comfortable feeling of being half awake in the middle of the night, feeling his hands on me and being vaguely aware that he is masturbating. I can go back to sleep knowing that I'm giving him pleasure without have to actually do anything.

I've never woken up with come on my face, but I have had come on other parts of my body where he was pressed against me as he got off.

But this isn't a "boyfriend". This is a husband.

Being able to take liberties with each other, and not having to ask first, is one of the rewards of a deep and loving marriage.

It isn't a violation of body and soul. We have one soul and our bodies belong to each other.

 

[Ziggy*stardust]

There is a really incredible moment when I'm half awake and realize that my body is already excited because he has been touching me for a while while I slept.

There is also a comfortable feeling of being half awake in the middle of the night, feeling his hands on me and being vaguely aware that he is masturbating. I can go back to sleep knowing that I'm giving him pleasure without have to actually do anything.

Originally posted by angela146
Being able to take liberties with each other, and not having to ask first, is one of the rewards of a deep and loving marriage.

It isn't a violation of body and soul. We have one soul and our bodies belong to each other.

Wow, we love what you wrote here and we can relate to it so much ... very nice!

Ziggy and stardust

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[Tooch McGroin]

Wow, your kidding right?

Sometimes.

A woman *always* reserves the right to say no. (unless she had explicitly offered in all serious to be your slave). Doesn't matter how much you love her or she loves you, you can't just 'take her' whenever you want.

But what if she likes to be taken? Did you read the posts from women like Italian Goddess?

Honest to god, this could be considered sexual assult. It is NOT suprise sex. Its taking advantage.

To you, it's Assault. To women like Italian Goddess, it's Surprise Sex. Some see it as demeaning, degrading, repugnant. Some see it as erotic, arousing, and fun. Yeah, it's taking advantage. So what?

Supose a guy has a rape fantasy and decides to act it out without discussing it with her? Or he wants to tie her up but she's not into it so he hancuffs her to the bed while she's sleeping and wakes her up with a slap?

Relatioinships are about the terms you set between the two of you, and if you have a set up were she has agreed to accept whatever you do to her, consentual or not- then you probably don't need to ask the question. Even then, you run a risk any time you awaken someone suddenly and rudely and with your genitals exposed. If someone threw water on me while I was sleeping, I'd likely have them half way killed before I was all the way awake.

Even husbands can be found guilty of rape. You don't 'suprise' someone you love with sex by doing things to them when they are unconcious. (UNless you are *damn* sure that it's something she wants- and even then it's risky).

We're talking about your loving partner - your SIGNIFICANT OTHER -- not some stranger. Not someone you just met. It's a given that the two of you have some understanding of each other's sexuality, boundaries, disposition, etc.

And yes, it is a violation of our body *and* our soul.

If you believe it's a violation, and if you believe in souls: maybe so. That doesn't change the fact that some women want to be "violated" -- body AND soul.

 

[Phoenix Stone]

Sometimes.



But what if she likes to be taken? Did you read the posts from women like Italian Goddess?

What if, what if, What If.... That is the whole point, Oh Touchy One. The point that has been made Over and Over. One needs to know IF. Kardon, apparently, does not. He is asking Us, not her. He wants to Surprise her, and wants to Guess, based on how we react, how she is likely to react. Would you come here and ask Us if you should try something on your girlfriend?

To you, it's Assault. To women like Italian Goddess, it's Surprise Sex. Some see it as demeaning, degrading, repugnant. Some see it as erotic, arousing, and fun. Yeah, it's taking advantage. So what?

Italian Goddess is also the Only ONe who didn't think he should Find Out First.

We're talking about your loving partner - your SIGNIFICANT OTHER -- not some stranger. Not someone you just met. It's a given that the two of you have some understanding of each other's sexuality, boundaries, disposition, etc.

Don't know which WE You are talking about but Kardon didn't say this was his SO, how long they'd been together or anything else, only that it was his girlfriend. It does not appear to be "A Given" in Kardon's case, that he has any understanding of Anything, beyond how to yank people's chains on this forum. His tone seemed to imply that he didn't Care about her boundaries, etc. (Don't say you can't read tone from posts, either. For instance, you can tell from mine I'm talking to you as if I think you are a little Deaf.) As Numerous posters have stated here, if one Knows ones partners proclivities, then there is no problem. There would then be no Question. And no need for you to Assume all these Givens.

No one here has any problem with Anyone else liking this. No one here but you seems to have any problem with anyone else Not liking it. What we Have been talking about is someone doing this Out of the Blue, Without Knowing whether we like it. (Btw, before having discussed this, as stated before I'd just have thought my husband had gone nuts. It would be such an unlikely thing for him to do, as he is a considerate man. The idea of it being done -- As A Surprise -- is reminiscent, for me, of having someone spit in my face. As much as I love and enjoy exchanging spit with my husband. If I woke up with spittle on my face, I'd feel like someone, well, spat in my face.
[/B][/QUOTE]

 

[Bobmi357]

A minority? There are at least 6 women posting to this thread who think it's ok. How many women posting to this thread think it's NOT ok?

Count again.

Ok McGroin. Its time to educate you if possible.

mi·nor·i·ty Audio pronunciation of minority ( P ) Pronunciation Key (m-nôr-t, -nr-, m-)
n. pl. mi·nor·i·ties

1.
1. The smaller in number of two groups forming a whole.
2. A group or party having fewer than a controlling number of votes.
2.
1. An ethnic, racial, religious, or other group having a distinctive presence within a society.
2. A group having little power or representation relative to other groups within a society.
3. A member of one of these groups. See Usage Note at color.
3. Law. The state or period of being under legal age: still in her minority.

Now then assuming you can read and understand that, a brief survey of those for this;

LatinaBabe
Catalina_Fransico
ItalianGoddess
Angela146
PartyGirl
SlavetoPain
ZiggyStardust

Count=Seven (7)

Those coming out against this idea,

College_geek
SummerMorning
Incognito
Lynnezertorte
Sheath
Loverlylisa
Wickedwoman
Dollface007
Kissmefirst
Sunfox
Phoenixstone
SableDrake
Asian_Sensation
Mary_Hall
Blastabird
hersixstring
Acamstar
Mskey
SexyChele
Browneyes26
Alyx
Vixenshe
pw27
Cutiemouse

Count= Twenty Four (24) as of this posting.

Now remember the definition of minority? Minority means the smaller portion, less represented. In political terms your number of votes would not see you in office unless you were George Bush.

Your 7 votes weigh in at a wonderful 22.5% of the total respondants whereas the
majority
fill the remaining 77.5%. Is this coming too fast for you?

So for the record. Minority is the smaller percentage, majority is the larger percentage. And 24 is larger than 7.

24 is larger
7 is smaller

MAJORITY
minority

Got it now?

 

[Tooch McGroin]

What if, what if, What If.... That is the whole point, Oh Touchy One. The point that has been made Over and Over. One needs to know IF. Kardon, apparently, does not. He is asking Us, not her. He wants to Surprise her, and wants to Guess, based on how we react, how she is likely to react. Would you come here and ask Us if you should try something on your girlfriend?

Don't know which WE You are talking about but Kardon didn't say this was his SO, how long they'd been together or anything else, only that it was his girlfriend. It does not appear to be "A Given" in Kardon's case, that he has any understanding of Anything, beyond how to yank people's chains on this forum. His tone seemed to imply that he didn't Care about her boundaries, etc. (Don't say you can't read tone from posts, either. For instance, you can tell from mine I'm talking to you as if I think you are a little Deaf.) As Numerous posters have stated here, if one Knows ones partners proclivities, then there is no problem. There would then be no Question. And no need for you to Assume all these Givens.

No one here has any problem with Anyone else liking this. No one here but you seems to have any problem with anyone else Not liking it. What we Have been talking about is someone doing this Out of the Blue, Without Knowing whether we like it. (Btw, before having discussed this, as stated before I'd just have thought my husband had gone nuts. It would be such an unlikely thing for him to do, as he is a considerate man. The idea of it being done -- As A Surprise -- is reminiscent, for me, of having someone spit in my face. As much as I love and enjoy exchanging spit with my husband. If I woke up with spittle on my face, I'd feel like someone, well, spat in my face.

Kardon asked: What if your SO came on your face while you were asleep? I take that question at face value. If my woman gushed on my face while I was asleep, I might respond in several ways, but one thing is for sure: I wouldn't mutilate her genitals, punch her in the pussy, or kill her. All this talk of brutal violence is so out of place. AND IT'S SICK.

I don't normally seek sex advice from strangers on a message board, but I won't rule it out. However, that has nothing to do with Kardon. I didn't read anything hostile in his question. I didn't sense any negative tone (and yes, I can read your tone. It's an obnoxious tone). Kardon asked an interesting question. I see no reason for anyone to get huffy about his question. Why does his question yank your chain?

I have no problem with anyone NOT liking a "sleeping cum facial." Once again for the slow ones: I have a problem with inappropriate and brutal violence against lovers.

Maybe at the end of a long day of picking up after a disgusting slob of a husband -- the sort of hubby who bathes infrequently, hogs the remote control, refuses to get a job or even throw out the garbage -- a surprise cum facial would probably drive a normally patient women over the edge. I can understand that! Okay, I guess I should just assume that all the violent responses are from women who are already in bad situations with nearly worthless "Significant Others".

 

[Tooch McGroin]

Your 7 votes weigh in at a wonderful 22.5% of the total respondants whereas the majority fill the remaining 77.5%. Is this coming too fast for you?

No, Bobby. It's coming very slowly because you are SLOW. And you MISCOUNTED. Try again, genius.

 

[grrrlieone]

ggest you talk to your SO and test the waters. I personally wouldn't mind, but a lot of women may. You shouldn'y just do it on a whim. Unless you are willing to deal with ANY number of possible reactions.....good luck.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[Tooch McGroin]

Tooch I read every single "I'd kill him" etc reply you did. Not once did I take any of them literally. If he hadn't discussed the idea with me first and gotten some idea that I'd be ok with it- yes- he would be risking a serious hit to his balls. If nothing else because I would have been dead asleep, have had no idea that was a possibility of happening, and no clue if it was my husband, or some rapist or pervert. He is in a band and I'm here alone until 3-4am a lot. If he got home earleir than expected and I was woken up from a dead sleep by him coming on my face, I might pop him out of a sleepy sense of self defence. this would be why discussing the idea beforehand- even casually would be necessary.

Okay, you need your rest. You don't want any rude interruptions. You might even be cranky, when abrubtly awakened. But...A RISK TO HIS BALLS? What sort of risk are you talking about? Do you usually harm his balls? Is your first reaction always a violent one?

STOP THE VIOLENCE!

 

[angela146]

So...

If you want to do something like this, first you have to build the deep level of trust and intimacy that's required.

Your relationship has to be close enough that she will wake up in the middle of it, be startled and then start laughing at the silliness of it.

The first dozen or so times that you wake her up sexually in the middle of the night, do it with a soft kiss. Don't restrain her. Make it so that she wakes up slowly to the soft sensuality of being loved.

Then, take it another step and wake her up with kisses, caresses, diddling between her legs and licking on her nipples (not necessarily all at the same time).

Maybe the next step is to try to get her almost ready to come before waking her up. (That can be really awesome).

After that, try the same thing but be on top of her when she wakes up and enter her once she realizes that she's about to haven a rip roaring orgasm.

Maybe somewhere along the line, you wake her up by tickling her so that it isn't always hot and horny. Then maybe try waking her up by licking her face.

After you've done this kind of thing for a couple of years, then maybe you can be silly and wake her up with come dripping all over her face.

All of the build up will give her a sense of security that when she wakes up with a wet face, it's probably her SO being goofy.

Sounds like a lot of work? Not really. Relationship-building over the long haul a lot of fun. That's what makes it a marriage as opposed to some chick you're sleeping with.