Transphobia blows

[YourPalAster]

I made a story recently, called Bunny and the Dog. A romance about a man and a trans man.

Since they both identify as male, I considered it gay. I added the appropriate tags to make sure that they know it was a trans man.

A dude came in my comments and accused me of ‘fetishizing’ trans people(?) because he ‘didn’t act like a man’ or something like that. It’s incredibly gatekeeping, and weird to just rant like that lmao.

But thoughts? Maybe I am wrong, who knows?

 

[rvagirl]

Transphobia does indeed blow. For a site that is supposed celebrate all the ways we can use our bodies, it’s rampant with users who just hate trans people.

Coming to the forums and seeing that has tarnished the main site for me a bit. There are some big name writers on here who I really admired for their work who post regularly about how they don’t like trans people. How am I supposed to enjoy their work now that I know they think I’m some sick degenerate?

On the writer side, I got it from a commenter for including a trans supporting character in one of my stories. She maybe appeared in 300 words out of 20k, but it was just too much for that reader. Sorry, bro. Trans people exist. Sometimes in fiction too!

In any case, I’m gonna totally read your story. It sounds like my cup of tea and the title has me intrigued!

 

[BrendaBear]

I think it is always a slippery slope when people try to “correct” other people. I am sure your story is fine. I wouldn’t worry to much about people who comment negatively on the internet. You point of view is every bit as valid as the next guy’s.

 

[YourPalAster]

Especially when I had a trans man help me develop this character, it’s just really weird lmao. Thank you both for the kindness tho

 

[rvagirl]

You’re welcome. Sending big rainbow hugs your way.

 

[Lifestyle66]

A dude came in my comments and accused me of ‘fetishizing’ trans people(?) because he ‘didn’t act like a man’ or something like that. It’s incredibly gatekeeping, and weird to just rant like that lmao.

But thoughts? Maybe I am wrong, who knows?

There are seven and a half BILLION people on this planet ... and one of them ranted in a comment.

Try to keep it in perspective, and don't lose sleep over it. Write what you want to write.

 

[AwkwardMD]

I've written a handful of trans stories, and stories featuring trans characters. The worst comments I ever got were on my lesbian story The Beast In Me, for "playing fast and loose with categories" and "trying to sneak trans characters everywhere". A whole bunch of other crap. Highly depressing to get that after working on a story for two months.

I'm proud as hell of that story, as should be the OP of their story.

Edit: @rvagirl's White Knighting is a wonderful trans story that deserves all the eyeballs it can get and more.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I made a story recently, called Bunny and the Dog. A romance about a man and a trans man.

Since they both identify as male, I considered it gay. I added the appropriate tags to make sure that they know it was a trans man.

A dude came in my comments and accused me of ‘fetishizing’ trans people(?) because he ‘didn’t act like a man’ or something like that. It’s incredibly gatekeeping, and weird to just rant like that lmao.

But thoughts? Maybe I am wrong, who knows?

Commenter says it's only gay if it's "cock on cock", which tells me they don't have much experience with GM sex, because there are PLENTY of other options even for cis guys. By that standard one guy keeping his pants on while blowing another guy isn't gay.

I didn't think your story was fetishising in the slightest. If anything, less so than a lot of the stuff in Trans/CD.

There seem to be quite a few readers who take exception to trans characters anywhere outside Trans/CD, and likewise to gay/lesbian characters outside Gay Male/Lesbian Sex. It's shitty; nobody would dream of saying "you can't put any cis characters in a Trans/CD story". It'd be ridiculous to put a story there just because there's a trans character if that isn't a major focus of the story.

I think @AwkwardMD's experience with The Beast In Me was one of the reasons I decided to post my last lesbian romance story in Romance rather than Lesbian Sex, where I usually hang out. Kind of a freedom of navigation exercise, reminding people that the category is "romance" not "straight romance".

 

[Bramblethorn]

I've written a handful of trans stories, and stories featuring trans characters. The worst comments I ever got were on my lesbian story The Beast In Me, for "playing fast and loose with categories" and "trying to sneak trans characters everywhere". A whole bunch of other crap. Highly depressing to get that after working on a story for two months.

I'm proud as hell of that story, as should be the OP of their story.

Edit: rvagirl's White Knighting is a wonderful trans story that deserves all the eyeballs it can get and more.

Yeah, putting TBIM in Trans/CD would have been ridiculous. It's a lesbian story with a romance arc where the partner happens to be trans; it's mentioned but it's not a huge theme in the story. May contain traces of nuts, but not the kind that cause people to choke up and die.

 

[MelissaBaby]

Coming to the forums and seeing that has tarnished the main site for me a bit. There are some big name writers on here who I really admired for their work who post regularly about how they don’t like trans people. How am I supposed to enjoy their work now that I know they think I’m some sick degenerate?

On the Author's Hangout? I haven't seen that, or perhaps I was not attentive to it. It certainly does not belong here.

 

[lovecraft68]

Simply put, you are fetishizing it. The same way people fetishize Interracial, the same way they do it to cheating, to committing incest, to raping someone, to screwing your mother in law.

This is a sex site, a dirty story site, a site where EVERYTHING is a kink. Whatever your motivation, however much depth you have in your story, ultimately the person is reading it to be aroused because they have a thing for sex with trans folks, whether they are one themselves, or curious, or think its a kink (I can't tell you how many straight men I know watch "chicks with dicks' videos because its a fascinating sort of taboo....is it gay if they have tits too? Who knows, I'm not asking the question because I don't care.

My point is yes, the person doesn't need to push their particular morals or beliefs at you, on the other hand you have some stones being offended at being accused of sexualizing something on a sex site. Comes across as morally highbrow as the commenter, and also the "A trans man helped me right this" Page out of the look at me, I know a -fill in the blank, trans, black, Asian, Muslim-person.

You're writing on the free and open net, you're allowing comments. There's no rule you have to like them all, and end of the day, this person may think he's defending something, just as you're defending your stance.

As someone else said, there's a lot of people out there, crying about one of them disagreeing with you is childish, and calling someone who is upset that in their mind you're insulting or doing a disservice to Transgender individuals a Transphobe is idiotic, they just have a feeling this is denigrating somehow....and TBH a lot of people here denigrate a lot of groups and are too ignorant to know it, or just don't care.

Just read the racist trash of the IR section, which was discussed in a thread recently.

We glorify sex here, and whatever the subject of the story, that's what we're pushing at that moment.

Get over yourself and stop playing a victim or some kind of martyr to a cause.

Take a good look out there, everything sucks.

 

[rvagirl]

Edit: @rvagirl's White Knighting is a wonderful trans story that deserves all the eyeballs it can get and more.

Thank you!

I tried to write an honest story about what falling in love and having great sex feels like to a trans woman. I'm happy to see a lot of readers have appreciated that, at least in the T&C section.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Simply put, you are fetishizing it. The same way people fetishize Interracial, the same way they do it to cheating, to committing incest, to raping someone, to screwing your mother in law.

This is a sex site, a dirty story site, a site where EVERYTHING is a kink. Whatever your motivation, however much depth you have in your story, ultimately the person is reading it to be aroused because they have a thing for sex with trans folks, whether they are one themselves, or curious, or think its a kink (I can't tell you how many straight men I know watch "chicks with dicks' videos because its a fascinating sort of taboo....is it gay if they have tits too? Who knows, I'm not asking the question because I don't care.

There are plenty of stories on this site which absolutely do fetishise trans people in the way you're describing, but I've read OP's story and it didn't come across that way. It's just a story where two people have sex and one of them is trans; it's mentioned but not emphasised. Anybody looking to get off on a trans fetish in that story is likely to be disappointed.

If I write a story about a Chinese accountant named Helen who has sex, it doesn't automatically mean I'm fetishising Chinese people or accountants or people named Helen. Probably it just means that I know a few accountants and Chinese people and Helens, and it would feel weird to whitewash my fictional worlds.

 

[rvagirl]

On the Author's Hangout? I haven't seen that, or perhaps I was not attentive to it. It certainly does not belong here.

No, mostly on politics. I guess I'm a masochist, but I find myself unable to look away whenever something to do with trans people gets posted.

I recognize that’s on me

 

[YourPalAster]

Simply put, you are fetishizing it. The same way people fetishize Interracial, the same way they do it to cheating, to committing incest, to raping someone, to screwing your mother in law.

This is a sex site, a dirty story site, a site where EVERYTHING is a kink. Whatever your motivation, however much depth you have in your story, ultimately the person is reading it to be aroused because they have a thing for sex with trans folks, whether they are one themselves, or curious, or think its a kink (I can't tell you how many straight men I know watch "chicks with dicks' videos because its a fascinating sort of taboo....is it gay if they have tits too? Who knows, I'm not asking the question because I don't care.

My point is yes, the person doesn't need to push their particular morals or beliefs at you, on the other hand you have some stones being offended at being accused of sexualizing something on a sex site. Comes across as morally highbrow as the commenter, and also the "A trans man helped me right this" Page out of the look at me, I know a -fill in the blank, trans, black, Asian, Muslim-person.

You're writing on the free and open net, you're allowing comments. There's no rule you have to like them all, and end of the day, this person may think he's defending something, just as you're defending your stance.

As someone else said, there's a lot of people out there, crying about one of them disagreeing with you is childish, and calling someone who is upset that in their mind you're insulting or doing a disservice to Transgender individuals a Transphobe is idiotic, they just have a feeling this is denigrating somehow....and TBH a lot of people here denigrate a lot of groups and are too ignorant to know it, or just don't care.

Just read the racist trash of the IR section, which was discussed in a thread recently.

We glorify sex here, and whatever the subject of the story, that's what we're pushing at that moment.

Get over yourself and stop playing a victim or some kind of martyr to a cause.

Take a good look out there, everything sucks.

Just because I have something in there, doesn’t mean I’m fetishizing like bro LMAO.

It’s a fuckin romance that just so happens to have a trans man in there, am I also fetishizing black people because one of the characters is black?

I like this picture you painted like I’m playing victim. Like you’ve never ranted in your life? It just irked me, ok? I just wanted to share my thoughts.

Everything doesn’t suck, honestly. Just transphobia.

 

[AwkwardMD]

Do not engage with Lovecraft. Save yourself some sanity and just ignore him.

 

[Bramblethorn]

On the Author's Hangout? I haven't seen that, or perhaps I was not attentive to it. It certainly does not belong here.

It does surface now and then on AH, but if you're not following those specific discussions (or if you have certain people on ignore) you could miss it. I would expect Politics is far worse but I avoid that forum for a reason.

 

[ElectricBlue]

Commenter says it's only gay if it's "cock on cock", which tells me they don't have much experience with GM sex, because there are PLENTY of other options even for cis guys. By that standard one guy keeping his pants on while blowing another guy isn't gay.

Sounds to me that commenter might be a "real man of Lit." You know, the guy who says he's not gay but reads GM anyway, just so he knows the signs if someone is making on him. They won't be, of course, which means another trip to the bookshop with the booth out the back. But that's not gay either, because that mouth might be a chick's.

The attitude sucks, and you'd like to think someone in GM would know better, but maybe not.

 

[YourPalAster]

Do not engage with Lovecraft. Save yourself some sanity and just ignore him.

I’m a petty person I had to for the one time lmao, I’ll behave I promise

 

[SimonDoom]

Simply put, you are fetishizing it. The same way people fetishize Interracial, the same way they do it to cheating, to committing incest, to raping someone, to screwing your mother in law.

I think you should take the time to read the story before you pronounce judgment on whether it "fetishizes" something. I don't get the sense from your comments that you bothered to read the OP's story.

I read it. It's short and easy to read. It doesn't fetishize at all. "Fetishizing" is when you treat a person's trait as an object. It's not fetishizing when the person with the trait is the subject rather than the object of the story. To insist otherwise would be terribly unfair to anyone who wants to write a story about a person whose traits deviate from the so-called norm. Everybody, from every walk of life and type and orientation, is entitled to have their story told, including their sex story. This was an erotic story told from a gay and trans point of view. That's not fetish, and it's terribly wrong unthinkingly to accuse someone who writes a story of this type to be fetishizing the subject matter.

I don't mean to imply that fetishizing is always wrong, either, because I don't believe that at all. But regardless, it's not a fetishy story.

OP: I don't think you did anything wrong at all. What happened to you and your story is you ran up against a common phenomenon at Literotica, which is intolerance of stories whose subjects arguably span more than one category. Some readers just can't stand that. But it's not your problem; it's theirs.

 

[MelissaBaby]

No, mostly on politics. I guess I'm a masochist, but I find myself unable to look away whenever something to do with trans people gets posted.

I recognize that’s on me

Yeah, I used to post on the GB, but the Politics board was a step too far for me.

I figure the only reason anyone would post there is because they know they can't hold their own in a real political discussion forum.

 

[SimonDoom]

No, mostly on politics. I guess I'm a masochist, but I find myself unable to look away whenever something to do with trans people gets posted.

I recognize that’s on me

I've been guilty of wading into the Politics board a few times, and I almost always regret it. I feel soiled afterward.

If you think about it: why would you come to an erotic story site, and talk politics? If you want to have a meaningful conversation about the politics of sex and eroticism, that's one thing (but good luck with that here). But most of the Politics Board discussion here features garden variety partisan name-calling of the "You suck" "No, you suck" variety.

 

[EarlyMorningLight]

I've written a handful of trans stories, and stories featuring trans characters. The worst comments I ever got were on my lesbian story The Beast In Me, for "playing fast and loose with categories" and "trying to sneak trans characters everywhere". A whole bunch of other crap. Highly depressing to get that after working on a story for two months.

I'm proud as hell of that story, as should be the OP of their story.

Reading that comment on "The Beast in Me" made me so [stream of expletives] angry. It's a beautiful story. One of my favourites on the site.

Edit: @rvagirl's White Knighting is a wonderful trans story that deserves all the eyeballs it can get and more.

SECONDED. I actually had to pause halfway through reading to send her a message telling her what a breath of fresh air it was.

I think @AwkwardMD's experience with The Beast In Me was one of the reasons I decided to post my last lesbian romance story in Romance rather than Lesbian Sex, where I usually hang out. Kind of a freedom of navigation exercise, reminding people that the category is "romance" not "straight romance".

I still kinda wish I'd put Juxtapositions in Group Sex instead of Gay Male. It bugs the hell out of me that m/m contact is received so poorly anywhere else on the site.

 

[EarlyMorningLight]

I made a story recently, called Bunny and the Dog. A romance about a man and a trans man.

Since they both identify as male, I considered it gay. I added the appropriate tags to make sure that they know it was a trans man.

A dude came in my comments and accused me of ‘fetishizing’ trans people(?) because he ‘didn’t act like a man’ or something like that. It’s incredibly gatekeeping, and weird to just rant like that lmao.

But thoughts? Maybe I am wrong, who knows?

I just read the story. I thought it was sweet and sexy, and totally gay. That commenter can take a long walk off of a short pier.

 

[LegoHead]

I made a story recently, called Bunny and the Dog. A romance about a man and a trans man.

Since they both identify as male, I considered it gay. I added the appropriate tags to make sure that they know it was a trans man.

A dude came in my comments and accused me of ‘fetishizing’ trans people(?) because he ‘didn’t act like a man’ or something like that. It’s incredibly gatekeeping, and weird to just rant like that lmao.

But thoughts? Maybe I am wrong, who knows?

If anything, the comment made on your story is trans-sympathetic, not phobic.

Anonymous Quote

This story should be in the Transgender/CD genre or category and not gay because not everyone wants to read about a trans man who behaves like a Japanese school girl. Cock on cock please because this story isn't gay and there is an existing category for this type of story so place it there. Another pet peeve of this story is if you are going to write about a trans man then let him be a man. Even the uke in yaoi behaves more like a man and this story seems to kind of fetishized trans men which is disgusting.

Since you can easily access the anonymous comment, badly explaining the quote so that you can label the commentor as transphobic is deceitful.

Another problem with your perception of the commenter's intentions is that you are only taking your own considerations into consideration. You consider your characters as gay since they both identify as male, while the commenter does not consider them gay since one is a trans man. There is a clearly established category for Transgender stories. There was no reason for you to "cross lines" to push your own gender politics.

Another problem is you have a trans man in name only. You have a biological woman dressing up as a man only to regress into "cute, girly" behavior. In essence, you're ignoring a major issue trans men, who feel they are born in the wrong body, attempt to overcome.

To biologically born gay males, the comment makes sense, although I believe the commenter was harsh when he used the word "disgusting."

Commenter says it's only gay if it's "cock on cock", which tells me they don't have much experience with GM sex, because there are PLENTY of other options even for cis guys. By that standard one guy keeping his pants on while blowing another guy isn't gay.

"cock on cock" isn't a sexual act that determines if someone is gay.

"cock on cock" means, and I'll explain it in a way you gender simps can understand, that a biologically born male is romantically involved with, to whatever extreme, a biologically born male.