The Challenge Club
- Thread starter Dingus Guy
- Start date
Black Tulip
Not so delicate flower
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
- Posts
- 5,945
What do I think? That it's mean!
Nah, do what suits you best.
I would like to read it, so at least provide a link when it's up.
I'm thinking of putting mine up for discussion in the SDC.
*shrugs*
Not sure yet.
Nah, do what suits you best.
I would like to read it, so at least provide a link when it's up.
I'm thinking of putting mine up for discussion in the SDC.
*shrugs*
Not sure yet.
Black Tulip
Not so delicate flower
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
- Posts
- 5,945
I finished the story at about 4500 words. I will put it up for discussion before submitting it but I will post the first bit here. Let me know if it is interesting enough to await the rest of it. LOL
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Dear Hunting
Dawn painted the sky a faint pink tinged with orange and Lars sniffed the air. He felt fairly sure it would snow later this day, but for now the sky lighted slowly up to a pearly white with the sun a pale disc on the horizon. Spring was coming late this year, he thought as he closed the flap of the tent behind him. It was nearly time to celebrate Ostara but there was no sign yet of the ice retreating from the summer plains.
At the sound of boots crunching on the frozen snow he turned his head and watched his hunting partners emerge from their own tents. Ivor, his bow across his shoulder, was still tying his pants as he stepped outside with a big grin on his broad face. No doubt he had started the day with greeting his woman in a proper way. Lars sighed and gazed at Knut. The smaller man had no woman of his own. Like Lars he had his own tent, ready to bring in a mate if they could find one, but so far they’d had no such luck.
Due to the ice still covering the plains, there hadn’t been any foraging by the women. Which meant there was no chance to catch a girl from another clan either. So the night before Lars had told his friends of his plan. He wanted to trek across the ice field to find the tents of another tribe so he and Knut could go girl hunting instead of reindeer. There was meat enough for the tribe so their contribution could be missed for a few days.
His persuasive, urgent words had easily incited Knut to go along. He was just as tired of using his hands as Lars was. And Ivor was generous enough to wish his friends a mate of their own. All he asked was that they would be back for the festivities of Spring Equinox, the honoring of Ostara as the source of all life. He hoped the goddess would bless him and his mate with young if they coupled during the celebration. Lars understood all too well. Ivor had no next of kin left since his sire had been gutted by a sabretooth last summer.
Lars nodded to both men and led the way out of the small circle of tents that housed their clan. The harsh long winter had dwindled their numbers till there were only ten tents left. No more than seven hunters besides the three of them. It was too little to survive for long. Proper hunting required at least ten men so any accident would be fatal for all the clan. He and Knut needed to contribute to a new generation of hunters.
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I think it will be properly placed as first time, even though it is partly reluctance.
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Dear Hunting
Dawn painted the sky a faint pink tinged with orange and Lars sniffed the air. He felt fairly sure it would snow later this day, but for now the sky lighted slowly up to a pearly white with the sun a pale disc on the horizon. Spring was coming late this year, he thought as he closed the flap of the tent behind him. It was nearly time to celebrate Ostara but there was no sign yet of the ice retreating from the summer plains.
At the sound of boots crunching on the frozen snow he turned his head and watched his hunting partners emerge from their own tents. Ivor, his bow across his shoulder, was still tying his pants as he stepped outside with a big grin on his broad face. No doubt he had started the day with greeting his woman in a proper way. Lars sighed and gazed at Knut. The smaller man had no woman of his own. Like Lars he had his own tent, ready to bring in a mate if they could find one, but so far they’d had no such luck.
Due to the ice still covering the plains, there hadn’t been any foraging by the women. Which meant there was no chance to catch a girl from another clan either. So the night before Lars had told his friends of his plan. He wanted to trek across the ice field to find the tents of another tribe so he and Knut could go girl hunting instead of reindeer. There was meat enough for the tribe so their contribution could be missed for a few days.
His persuasive, urgent words had easily incited Knut to go along. He was just as tired of using his hands as Lars was. And Ivor was generous enough to wish his friends a mate of their own. All he asked was that they would be back for the festivities of Spring Equinox, the honoring of Ostara as the source of all life. He hoped the goddess would bless him and his mate with young if they coupled during the celebration. Lars understood all too well. Ivor had no next of kin left since his sire had been gutted by a sabretooth last summer.
Lars nodded to both men and led the way out of the small circle of tents that housed their clan. The harsh long winter had dwindled their numbers till there were only ten tents left. No more than seven hunters besides the three of them. It was too little to survive for long. Proper hunting required at least ten men so any accident would be fatal for all the clan. He and Knut needed to contribute to a new generation of hunters.
------------------------------------------------------------
I think it will be properly placed as first time, even though it is partly reluctance.
Black Tulip said:I finished the story at about 4500 words. I will put it up for discussion before submitting it but I will post the first bit here. Let me know if it is interesting enough to await the rest of it. LOL
------------------------------------------------------
Deer Hunting
Dawn painted the sky a faint pink tinged with orange and Lars sniffed the air. He felt fairly sure it would snow later this day, but for now the sky lighted slowly up to a pearly white with the sun a pale disc on the horizon. Spring was coming late this year, he thought, closing as he closed the flap of the tent behind him. It was nearly time to celebrate Ostara but there was no sign yet of the ice retreating from the summer plains.
At the sound of boots crunching on the frozen snow he turned his head and watched his hunting partners emerge from their own tents. Ivor, his bow across his shoulder, was still tying his pants as he stepped outside with a big grin on his broad face. No doubt he had started the day with greeting his woman in a proper way. Lars sighed and gazed at Knut. The smaller man had no woman of his own. Like Lars he had his own tent, ready to bring in a mate if they could find one, but so far they�d had no such luck.
Due to the ice still covering the plains, there hadn�t been any foraging by the women. Which meant there was no chance to catch a girl from another clan either. So the night before Lars had told his friends of his plan. He wanted to trek across the ice field to find the tents of another tribe so he and Knut could go girl hunting instead of reindeer. There was meat enough for the tribe so their contribution could be missed for a few days.
His persuasive, urgent words had easily incited Knut to go along. He was just as tired of using his hands, just like Lars. as Lars was. And Ivor was generous enough to wish his friends a mate of their own. All he asked was that they would be back for the festivities of Spring Equinox, the honoring of Ostara as the source of all life. He hoped the goddess would bless him and his mate with young if they coupled during the celebration. Lars understood all too well. Ivor had no next of kin left since his sire had been gutted by a sabretooth last summer.
Lars nodded to both men and led the way out of the small circle of tents that housed their clan. The harsh long winter had dwindled their numbers till there were only ten tents left. No more than seven hunters besides the three of them. It was too little to survive for long. Proper hunting required at least ten men so any accident would be fatal for all the clan. He and Knut needed to contribute to a new generation of hunters.
------------------------------------------------------------
I think it will be properly placed as first time, even though it is partly reluctance.
Hi BT
Interesting start, I can see the potential for the story, should make a good read. I've added a couple of 'stand out' corrections, hope you don't mind.
Let us know when it's going to be posted.
EDIT: Was 'Dear Hunting' a play on words? if so, I apologise.
Black Tulip
Not so delicate flower
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
- Posts
- 5,945
LOL
Yes, it was deliberate but you had me laughing with that.
No need for apologies. I'm more disappointed that you caught on right after.
Yes, it was deliberate but you had me laughing with that.
No need for apologies. I'm more disappointed that you caught on right after.
Dingus Guy
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2003
- Posts
- 718
Hey BT
My thoughts were crossed with the little blurb that I have written so far. I realized that I spelled sabertooth as such and I suppose yours is right since Neonlyte corrected it. Hi Neon! I thought the title, "Dear Hunting" was a play on words if it means anything. Anyway, were tents available back then? I thought they survived in caves. Too much flintstones I suppose. It was an interesting read, and I especially loved the name Knut.
My thoughts were crossed with the little blurb that I have written so far. I realized that I spelled sabertooth as such and I suppose yours is right since Neonlyte corrected it. Hi Neon! I thought the title, "Dear Hunting" was a play on words if it means anything. Anyway, were tents available back then? I thought they survived in caves. Too much flintstones I suppose. It was an interesting read, and I especially loved the name Knut.
Black Tulip
Not so delicate flower
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
- Posts
- 5,945
LOL I never checked the spelling of sabretooth to be honest. And yes, the dear is deliberate.
The reindeer hunters had no caves as the whole of their world was covered in ice, as far as I could find. There were cave dwellers, but not up north I think.
Glad to hear you guys are interested. I have offered the whole up for discussion in the Story Discussion Circle. We'll see what happens to it there.
The reindeer hunters had no caves as the whole of their world was covered in ice, as far as I could find. There were cave dwellers, but not up north I think.
Glad to hear you guys are interested. I have offered the whole up for discussion in the Story Discussion Circle. We'll see what happens to it there.
Something odd. This is the only thread I can get to open and it opens missing the last couple of pages. Just Testing to see what happens!
EDIT: It posted, but the post above on my screen is several months old?
Don't understand what's going on here, will come back later
2nd EDIT: The old posts are slowly coming back, just a few days missing now - freeky!
EDIT: It posted, but the post above on my screen is several months old?
Don't understand what's going on here, will come back later
2nd EDIT: The old posts are slowly coming back, just a few days missing now - freeky!
Last edited:
Dingus Guy
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2003
- Posts
- 718
Neon, I noticed it last night too. I never saw your post last night, just stuff from months ago. Manu did offer an apology that something was being fixed. It seems to be fixed now. Anyhow, my story will be posted here later. It is short and not worthy of a submission.
Dingus Guy said:
Hi DG
Look forward to reading yours. When I logged in last night it looked as if Crimson had posted a couple of hours before, it's not come back, there's still a couple of days gap in posts.
Not sure what to do with mine, I'm inclined to keep it for Earth Day next month, just post an extract here. The end needs a lot of work, needs re-writing and I don't have time to do it just now.
Take care.
CrimsonMaiden
Pretty in Pink
- Joined
- Jul 10, 2004
- Posts
- 13,481
Yeah, I posted my story and now it's gone. I'll wait a little while longer before posting it again to see if it shows up.
CrimsonMaiden said:
Hi Crim
They 'lost' a few hours of posts, I think Manu was reading Shereads "I can't watch Benny Hill while your sucking my cock" and spewed diet-coke all over the server.
He's threatening a major overhaul for tomorrow, probably means we'll lose today as well so probably better to extend the deadline by a couple of days, let things settle down.
How are you? Sorry should have asked that first.
CrimsonMaiden
Pretty in Pink
- Joined
- Jul 10, 2004
- Posts
- 13,481
(god I hate this new minimum number of characters thing with the new boards)
Last edited:
Dingus Guy
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2003
- Posts
- 718
Hey CM
I like the new style board we got here. Fancy ain't it? Happy Valentine's Day to all that it might apply to. I would guess it is US custom, but let the love go through this board with the intent in which I give it, wholeheartedly and with the passion of a leprechaun hording his treasure.
Now to CM's story...it was fine. You managed to find a way to justify rape, interesting twist. I would guess she would not be going to the cavepolice on this one. Anyway, the blurb you gave us has potential to develop into a love story. Brute eventually woos maiden, blah...blah...blah. It is much better than the offering I have here. I didn't feel comfortable writing much of it, but sometimes one must force the words out in order to gain momentum. So here is my little story, all 2100 words of it:
The First Lesbians
By
Dingus Guy
Hidden behind a huge rock and a couple of overgrown shrubs, Pinkta watched her mate Darg communicate with the newcomers. Darg seemed upset that anyone would approach his land without an offering of some kind to him or his people. Darg was a fearless leader, a trait that made Pinkta very proud to have been his chosen. He was a good leader and an even better lover. He held his sabretooth club against his shoulder with confident weariness, while the others behind him stood ready to back him with their clubs raised high in a menacing gesture.
Pinkta noticed at once that this tribe was different from her own. Firstly, they didn't look threatened nor did they look ready to fight in anyway. She thought they would topple easy if Darg chose to do so. Secondly, they seemed to stand taller and straighter than her people. Their hair was lighter and their heads were smaller and shaped differently. They also carried odd weapons slung around them by some kind of clothe and it made the weapons stick out behind them and into the air. Their leader stood taller than Darg and didn't seem to be afraid of anything as he listened to Darg bark orders at him. He responded with lots of hand movements and talked softly. Pinkta couldn't hear him from the distance she was at, so she just watched the scene unfold as the two leaders faced off.
Darg began waving his left hand in a very dismissing motion. The tall leader held a hand palm out to Darg as the familiar sign to stop his action. Darg took this as a rude gesture and took his club off his shoulder and the others behind him took a step forward as well. The strange leader smiled and shook his head negatively and put his hand down and called out behind him without losing eye contact with Darg. Darg didn't know what to make of the smile, but it was obviously non-threatening to him so he put the club back to his shoulder. Through the crowd of tall standing men came a fair-haired woman.
While her skin was bronzed from the sun, the woman's hair was not. It was similar in color to a tortoises's underbelly before cooking. All of the men, including Darg seemed to be taken aback by the woman's appearance. She also stood upright like the men in her tribe as she came around and stood in between the two tribes. Her leader made a motion from her to Darg as if he was offering her to him. Pinkta was a little annoyed with this, and even more so when her mate reached out and touched the hair of the woman. The woman didn't flinch as she allowed Darg to stroke her hair. She merely smiled her approval at his touch. Darg looked back at his adversary and nodded his own approval and grunted his delight in his new possession. Pinkta was angered by her mate's show of disrespect towards her and she sprung out of her hiding place and charged towards them.
All of the men, including the newcomers raised their weapons defensively at Pinkta's sudden intrusion. She ran right up to Darg who looked away as if he knew better to meet the eyes of his angry woman. Even a leader knew his place, and Pinkta never let him forget it. She turned on the woman and shoved her to the ground and hollered at her that she was not her mate's prize. The woman looked back at Pinkta and smiled back at her in a way that made Pinkta feel uneasy. She had never encountered such weird clan. She looked at the tribal leader, but he had backed up with arms folded expecting a fight between the women. Darg too moved everyone of Pinkta's tribe back a few steps. The light haired woman stood up and she stretched her neck and head to the side and it cracked loudly. She tilted her head to the other side and it made some same crackling sound. She then circled Pinkta, smiling the whole time.
Pinkta pointed at Darg and told the woman that she would not be having her man. The woman didn't grasp her warning, instead she took two striding steps and ended up directly in front of Pinkta. Pinkta made a move to push the tall woman, but the woman was too quick and instead grabbed her wrists and she tumbled to the ground off balance. The woman's legs quickly pinned Pinkta's arms to her side. Pinkta struggled to break free, but the woman didn't make any attempts to assault her, instead she bent over and smelled Pinkta's face. The woman put a finger on her lips and made a hushing sound, trying to quiet her. Pinkta felt the woman's strength and yet she wasn't using it all. Just enough to subdue Pinkta to the grass.
She knew the two tribes were watching so Pinkta didn't give up her struggle, but there was something about the stranger that calmed Pinkta deep within herself. The woman had such a strange way about her, and that smile, it was the weirdest thing to Pinkta. She needed to break free, but the woman unexpectedly placed her hands on Pinkta's face. She gently touched her and she looked deeply into Pinkta's eyes and she felt her heart skip a beat. Pinkta's struggles lessened and when the woman sensed Pinkta's submission, she leaned forward and kissed Pinkta on her lips. Holding her face still and feeling the unfamiliar lips, Pinkta didn't know how to react. The kiss was so gentle, unlike the way Darg would aggressively attack Pinkta's mouth. There was nothing gentle about Darg, but this woman was giving Pinkta chills with the manipulations of her lips.
“Pinkta!” Darg yelled as he watched the scene unfold. Pinkta turned and looked at him as their kiss was broken. Darg looked at her strangely. It wasn't disapproving, but it wasn't like he looked angry. She didn't know what he was thinking, but the woman turned Pinkta's face back towards her own.
“Pinkta,” she mimicked in whispered tones. She then bent towards Pinkta for another soft kiss. “Pinkta,” she repeated, then touched her own chest telling Pinkta her own name, “Lesba.”
Confusion surrounded Pinkta as she was mesmerized by Lesba and the way she was pinned down by her. All the struggle had evaporated from her and she was intrigued to feel the softness of Lesba's lips again across her own. She heard Darg in the distance, but she didn't care. She was feeling something she had never felt with him before. Something new and exciting that Pinkta felt was impossible to explain. She wanting to kiss her again so she arched herself the best she could and Lesba felt her plight and met her half way with a longer, more passionate kiss than before.
Lesba thrust her tongue against Pinkta's and this excited her very much. She felt a familiar tingle and wetness start in between her legs that she had usually felt when Darg made love to her. It was some how different this time with this woman. There was a need that wasn't there previously, and the curiosity that it brought left Pinkta wanton. Their tongues played against each other and Pinkta felt Lesba slide her hand to the back of her neck. They were locked there in this strange embrace and the rest of the world seemed to fade away.
After a long moment, Lesba backed away and looked lovingly into Pinkta's eyes. In that moment, the woman seemed to warm the blood within Pinkta's chest. There was nothing in any experience of her life that she could relate what she felt for this woman now. Pinkta wanted Lesba more than any man she had ever been taken by. Lesba smiled deeply, passionately and Pinkta tried to return a seductive look of her own, but she was afraid she failed miserably. Sensing Pinkta's attempt, Lesba pecked her on the cheek softly. She then shifted her body so her legs extended freeing Pinkta's pinned arms.
Tilting Pinkta's neck to the side, Lesba kissed then gently sucked the nape of Pinkta's neck. This sent chills down her spine. The woman continued suckling as she slid down her chest ripping her clothe to shreds with one tug. Pinkta's ample chest jiggled into view. She could hardly hear the tribes grunting around them as the men were obviously looking on with interest. Pinkta didn't really care anymore as Lesba's mouth and hands excited her body as they worked down to Pinkta's breasts. Lesba nibbled down on Pinkta's left nipple sucking on it hard so it grew stiff and erect in her mouth. With her right hand she massaged Pinkta's right breast until she achieved the same result. Pinkta ran her fingers through Lesba's golden hair as her breathe became labored. She felt Lesba's tongue dance wildly across her chest until she was on top of her right breast, teasing her nipple and making Pinkta arch her back in delight.
Using her tongue sort of like a guide, she licked down Pinkta's taut stomach all the while her hands held onto Pinkta's breasts. The motion of the tongue send endless chills through Pinkta's body. Her back arched and her legs spread as Lesba slithered down her body so that Lesba came in between Pinkta's. When Lesba finally reached Pinkta's pussy, Lesba released her breasts and spread her legs and immediately dove to her damp pussy. Softly, Lesba's mouth tasted Pinkta and eager to please she wiggled her tongue deep within her wet gash. Pinkta was at her mercy as a soft moan escaped her. Feelings she had never felt before were growing deep inside her now. Each lick brought her closer to something she couldn't comprehend, yet it was something she so desperately wanted.
Burying her face deep within her pussy, Lesba became more aggressive with her tongue strokes. Each saliva induced lap hit the very sensitive part of her womanhood, her clitoris. Never in Pinkta's life had she ever felt such an intense pleasure. Darg had never satisfied her in such a way. Yes, there was pleasure when he had her, but it was usually over before it began. His thrusts never brought this kind of response of her. It confused her, and although she felt panic, she couldn't abandon it because it also intrigued her. A part of her wanted to slap the woman away and run, but a new voice was taking over and it cried out for more. It was in this voice that she cried aloud in ecstasy for all the lands to hear. Nothing else existed for her, except Lesba.
Along with the tongue, fingers were inserted inside Pinkta's soaked tunnel. Lesba was working them in and out of her as she sucked hard on her clit. Thrashing back and forth, Pinkta just reveled in the moment. Something powerful was building in her. All the pleasure she was feeling was erupting inside of her. The onslaught was making her squeal, and she was close, Pinkta felt it. Each finger thrust and clit lick, made her moan louder and louder until it all came crashing into one giant explosive orgasm. An orgasm Pinkta had never had in all her days with Darg or anyone before him. She bucked as Lesba held her still with her fingers and face. Her fingers moved in a quickened pace, expanding the pleasure as she rode it out for all it was worth. Sensing Pinkta's finale, Lesba released her fingers and tongue and looked up at Pinkta's satisfied grin.
Rolling back up to Pinkta, Lesba kissed her deeply once again. Pinkta tasted something different than before. She realized it was herself, but it didn't shock her. It was odd, but it made Pinkta want to kiss her back even more. So she did, but at that moment, Lesba was lifted away, so it only lasted a couple of seconds. Looking up, she saw Darg pulling at Lesba's arm. Lesba showed no sign of resistance. Lesba still held the same curious smile she had on since meeting Pinkta. Not even caring about her nakedness, Pinkta ran to Darg and pushed him away from Lesba. Darg grew angered, but because of the guest tribe he laughed instead. He grabbed Pinkta and then Lesba and pulled them together towards him private cave. He smiled back at the other leader, Menage and grunted his approval. The tribes were now one.
I like the new style board we got here. Fancy ain't it? Happy Valentine's Day to all that it might apply to. I would guess it is US custom, but let the love go through this board with the intent in which I give it, wholeheartedly and with the passion of a leprechaun hording his treasure.
Now to CM's story...it was fine. You managed to find a way to justify rape, interesting twist. I would guess she would not be going to the cavepolice on this one. Anyway, the blurb you gave us has potential to develop into a love story. Brute eventually woos maiden, blah...blah...blah. It is much better than the offering I have here. I didn't feel comfortable writing much of it, but sometimes one must force the words out in order to gain momentum. So here is my little story, all 2100 words of it:
The First Lesbians
By
Dingus Guy
Hidden behind a huge rock and a couple of overgrown shrubs, Pinkta watched her mate Darg communicate with the newcomers. Darg seemed upset that anyone would approach his land without an offering of some kind to him or his people. Darg was a fearless leader, a trait that made Pinkta very proud to have been his chosen. He was a good leader and an even better lover. He held his sabretooth club against his shoulder with confident weariness, while the others behind him stood ready to back him with their clubs raised high in a menacing gesture.
Pinkta noticed at once that this tribe was different from her own. Firstly, they didn't look threatened nor did they look ready to fight in anyway. She thought they would topple easy if Darg chose to do so. Secondly, they seemed to stand taller and straighter than her people. Their hair was lighter and their heads were smaller and shaped differently. They also carried odd weapons slung around them by some kind of clothe and it made the weapons stick out behind them and into the air. Their leader stood taller than Darg and didn't seem to be afraid of anything as he listened to Darg bark orders at him. He responded with lots of hand movements and talked softly. Pinkta couldn't hear him from the distance she was at, so she just watched the scene unfold as the two leaders faced off.
Darg began waving his left hand in a very dismissing motion. The tall leader held a hand palm out to Darg as the familiar sign to stop his action. Darg took this as a rude gesture and took his club off his shoulder and the others behind him took a step forward as well. The strange leader smiled and shook his head negatively and put his hand down and called out behind him without losing eye contact with Darg. Darg didn't know what to make of the smile, but it was obviously non-threatening to him so he put the club back to his shoulder. Through the crowd of tall standing men came a fair-haired woman.
While her skin was bronzed from the sun, the woman's hair was not. It was similar in color to a tortoises's underbelly before cooking. All of the men, including Darg seemed to be taken aback by the woman's appearance. She also stood upright like the men in her tribe as she came around and stood in between the two tribes. Her leader made a motion from her to Darg as if he was offering her to him. Pinkta was a little annoyed with this, and even more so when her mate reached out and touched the hair of the woman. The woman didn't flinch as she allowed Darg to stroke her hair. She merely smiled her approval at his touch. Darg looked back at his adversary and nodded his own approval and grunted his delight in his new possession. Pinkta was angered by her mate's show of disrespect towards her and she sprung out of her hiding place and charged towards them.
All of the men, including the newcomers raised their weapons defensively at Pinkta's sudden intrusion. She ran right up to Darg who looked away as if he knew better to meet the eyes of his angry woman. Even a leader knew his place, and Pinkta never let him forget it. She turned on the woman and shoved her to the ground and hollered at her that she was not her mate's prize. The woman looked back at Pinkta and smiled back at her in a way that made Pinkta feel uneasy. She had never encountered such weird clan. She looked at the tribal leader, but he had backed up with arms folded expecting a fight between the women. Darg too moved everyone of Pinkta's tribe back a few steps. The light haired woman stood up and she stretched her neck and head to the side and it cracked loudly. She tilted her head to the other side and it made some same crackling sound. She then circled Pinkta, smiling the whole time.
Pinkta pointed at Darg and told the woman that she would not be having her man. The woman didn't grasp her warning, instead she took two striding steps and ended up directly in front of Pinkta. Pinkta made a move to push the tall woman, but the woman was too quick and instead grabbed her wrists and she tumbled to the ground off balance. The woman's legs quickly pinned Pinkta's arms to her side. Pinkta struggled to break free, but the woman didn't make any attempts to assault her, instead she bent over and smelled Pinkta's face. The woman put a finger on her lips and made a hushing sound, trying to quiet her. Pinkta felt the woman's strength and yet she wasn't using it all. Just enough to subdue Pinkta to the grass.
She knew the two tribes were watching so Pinkta didn't give up her struggle, but there was something about the stranger that calmed Pinkta deep within herself. The woman had such a strange way about her, and that smile, it was the weirdest thing to Pinkta. She needed to break free, but the woman unexpectedly placed her hands on Pinkta's face. She gently touched her and she looked deeply into Pinkta's eyes and she felt her heart skip a beat. Pinkta's struggles lessened and when the woman sensed Pinkta's submission, she leaned forward and kissed Pinkta on her lips. Holding her face still and feeling the unfamiliar lips, Pinkta didn't know how to react. The kiss was so gentle, unlike the way Darg would aggressively attack Pinkta's mouth. There was nothing gentle about Darg, but this woman was giving Pinkta chills with the manipulations of her lips.
“Pinkta!” Darg yelled as he watched the scene unfold. Pinkta turned and looked at him as their kiss was broken. Darg looked at her strangely. It wasn't disapproving, but it wasn't like he looked angry. She didn't know what he was thinking, but the woman turned Pinkta's face back towards her own.
“Pinkta,” she mimicked in whispered tones. She then bent towards Pinkta for another soft kiss. “Pinkta,” she repeated, then touched her own chest telling Pinkta her own name, “Lesba.”
Confusion surrounded Pinkta as she was mesmerized by Lesba and the way she was pinned down by her. All the struggle had evaporated from her and she was intrigued to feel the softness of Lesba's lips again across her own. She heard Darg in the distance, but she didn't care. She was feeling something she had never felt with him before. Something new and exciting that Pinkta felt was impossible to explain. She wanting to kiss her again so she arched herself the best she could and Lesba felt her plight and met her half way with a longer, more passionate kiss than before.
Lesba thrust her tongue against Pinkta's and this excited her very much. She felt a familiar tingle and wetness start in between her legs that she had usually felt when Darg made love to her. It was some how different this time with this woman. There was a need that wasn't there previously, and the curiosity that it brought left Pinkta wanton. Their tongues played against each other and Pinkta felt Lesba slide her hand to the back of her neck. They were locked there in this strange embrace and the rest of the world seemed to fade away.
After a long moment, Lesba backed away and looked lovingly into Pinkta's eyes. In that moment, the woman seemed to warm the blood within Pinkta's chest. There was nothing in any experience of her life that she could relate what she felt for this woman now. Pinkta wanted Lesba more than any man she had ever been taken by. Lesba smiled deeply, passionately and Pinkta tried to return a seductive look of her own, but she was afraid she failed miserably. Sensing Pinkta's attempt, Lesba pecked her on the cheek softly. She then shifted her body so her legs extended freeing Pinkta's pinned arms.
Tilting Pinkta's neck to the side, Lesba kissed then gently sucked the nape of Pinkta's neck. This sent chills down her spine. The woman continued suckling as she slid down her chest ripping her clothe to shreds with one tug. Pinkta's ample chest jiggled into view. She could hardly hear the tribes grunting around them as the men were obviously looking on with interest. Pinkta didn't really care anymore as Lesba's mouth and hands excited her body as they worked down to Pinkta's breasts. Lesba nibbled down on Pinkta's left nipple sucking on it hard so it grew stiff and erect in her mouth. With her right hand she massaged Pinkta's right breast until she achieved the same result. Pinkta ran her fingers through Lesba's golden hair as her breathe became labored. She felt Lesba's tongue dance wildly across her chest until she was on top of her right breast, teasing her nipple and making Pinkta arch her back in delight.
Using her tongue sort of like a guide, she licked down Pinkta's taut stomach all the while her hands held onto Pinkta's breasts. The motion of the tongue send endless chills through Pinkta's body. Her back arched and her legs spread as Lesba slithered down her body so that Lesba came in between Pinkta's. When Lesba finally reached Pinkta's pussy, Lesba released her breasts and spread her legs and immediately dove to her damp pussy. Softly, Lesba's mouth tasted Pinkta and eager to please she wiggled her tongue deep within her wet gash. Pinkta was at her mercy as a soft moan escaped her. Feelings she had never felt before were growing deep inside her now. Each lick brought her closer to something she couldn't comprehend, yet it was something she so desperately wanted.
Burying her face deep within her pussy, Lesba became more aggressive with her tongue strokes. Each saliva induced lap hit the very sensitive part of her womanhood, her clitoris. Never in Pinkta's life had she ever felt such an intense pleasure. Darg had never satisfied her in such a way. Yes, there was pleasure when he had her, but it was usually over before it began. His thrusts never brought this kind of response of her. It confused her, and although she felt panic, she couldn't abandon it because it also intrigued her. A part of her wanted to slap the woman away and run, but a new voice was taking over and it cried out for more. It was in this voice that she cried aloud in ecstasy for all the lands to hear. Nothing else existed for her, except Lesba.
Along with the tongue, fingers were inserted inside Pinkta's soaked tunnel. Lesba was working them in and out of her as she sucked hard on her clit. Thrashing back and forth, Pinkta just reveled in the moment. Something powerful was building in her. All the pleasure she was feeling was erupting inside of her. The onslaught was making her squeal, and she was close, Pinkta felt it. Each finger thrust and clit lick, made her moan louder and louder until it all came crashing into one giant explosive orgasm. An orgasm Pinkta had never had in all her days with Darg or anyone before him. She bucked as Lesba held her still with her fingers and face. Her fingers moved in a quickened pace, expanding the pleasure as she rode it out for all it was worth. Sensing Pinkta's finale, Lesba released her fingers and tongue and looked up at Pinkta's satisfied grin.
Rolling back up to Pinkta, Lesba kissed her deeply once again. Pinkta tasted something different than before. She realized it was herself, but it didn't shock her. It was odd, but it made Pinkta want to kiss her back even more. So she did, but at that moment, Lesba was lifted away, so it only lasted a couple of seconds. Looking up, she saw Darg pulling at Lesba's arm. Lesba showed no sign of resistance. Lesba still held the same curious smile she had on since meeting Pinkta. Not even caring about her nakedness, Pinkta ran to Darg and pushed him away from Lesba. Darg grew angered, but because of the guest tribe he laughed instead. He grabbed Pinkta and then Lesba and pulled them together towards him private cave. He smiled back at the other leader, Menage and grunted his approval. The tribes were now one.
Black Tulip
Not so delicate flower
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
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Hi guys,
Glad we're back on and I do like the new look of the board as well.
Crim,
I liked the way your thoughts are going. LOL
Not that much different from mine.
I do feel you have to expand, this is no more than the start.
Make it into a regular love story.
As it is now, the end feels a bit rushed.
I'll read yours next, Dingus.
Glad we're back on and I do like the new look of the board as well.
Crim,
I liked the way your thoughts are going. LOL
Not that much different from mine.
I do feel you have to expand, this is no more than the start.
Make it into a regular love story.
As it is now, the end feels a bit rushed.
I'll read yours next, Dingus.
CrimsonMaiden
Pretty in Pink
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- Jul 10, 2004
- Posts
- 13,481
BT, I really liked yours and I definitely think you should submit it.
DG, I think you should sumbit yours too. I loved the name Lesba!
Mine will likely be continued in other chapters and the rest will probably either go into Erotic Couplings or Romance since she's resigned to her new life.
DG, I think you should sumbit yours too. I loved the name Lesba!
Mine will likely be continued in other chapters and the rest will probably either go into Erotic Couplings or Romance since she's resigned to her new life.
Black Tulip
Not so delicate flower
- Joined
- Oct 12, 2003
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- 5,945
Dingus,
I liked your story. Very nice. There was some vagueness, could use a bit more background but overall a good read.
One odd thing, near the end you suddenly give the name of the other man.
Edited: Menage! Duhhh.
I liked your story. Very nice. There was some vagueness, could use a bit more background but overall a good read.
One odd thing, near the end you suddenly give the name of the other man.
Edited: Menage! Duhhh.
Dingus Guy
Literotica Guru
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- Oct 9, 2003
- Posts
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Black Tulip said:Dingus,
I liked your story. Very nice. There was some vagueness, could use a bit more background but overall a good read.
One odd thing, near the end you suddenly give the name of the other man.
Edited: Menage! Duhhh.
I am glad you
caught that. Lesba, Pinkta and Menage all were names purposesly picked for the story. Darg meant nothing. Thanks ladies for your kind words. I wasn't too happy with it actually, so I probably won't submit it. The vagueness was probably due to the fact that I just wanted to wrap it up as soon as I could. Ha! 
Crimson
Just read your story. Short and to the 'point'!
My one critiscism would be that it requires more justification for the 'rape'. I think the problem for me starts in Para 2 sentence 2, extending that part to encompass the need to mate, produce offspring for the benefit of the whole tribe, strength in numbers will, in my opinion, help justify what follows. Especially as you have this kind of expose at the end where the mating is 'approved' by the leaders.
I liked the touch of compassion shown by the guy, that's good, and he intends to build from that. So it's a nice twist that I think will work even better by justifying the tribal benefits.
Just read your story. Short and to the 'point'!
My one critiscism would be that it requires more justification for the 'rape'. I think the problem for me starts in Para 2 sentence 2, extending that part to encompass the need to mate, produce offspring for the benefit of the whole tribe, strength in numbers will, in my opinion, help justify what follows. Especially as you have this kind of expose at the end where the mating is 'approved' by the leaders.
I liked the touch of compassion shown by the guy, that's good, and he intends to build from that. So it's a nice twist that I think will work even better by justifying the tribal benefits.
Dingus
I enjoyed that! That worked for me, but then I guess it's pandering to the old male fantasy. I don't know why you're reluctant to work this up. Just needs a little more toward the beginning and end to fill in some background and depth.
I'd go for it.
I enjoyed that! That worked for me, but then I guess it's pandering to the old male fantasy. I don't know why you're reluctant to work this up. Just needs a little more toward the beginning and end to fill in some background and depth.
I'd go for it.
here is an extract from 'Third Born', I'm going to work it up for submission possibly saving it for Earth Day because it doesn't look like I'll have much writing time between now and then.
She left the settlement a few days earlier. Each moon when the women bled they went to a separate camp in the valley, a few hundred metres from where the narrow path connecting the caves to the valley sprung clinging to the cliff face. The valley camp primarily served as a place where the old and ill waited for scavengers to relieve them of their pain and scatter their bones across the landscape. During their bleeding the women rested nearby, a clearing backed by an outcrop of rocks that shielded the fire from the inquisitive eyes of all but the most daring. She'd been dragged to the place by the Leader's older female when she'd first bled, thought she was being left to die until finding two other women already there.
At first, the place had scared her, not the bleeding, she'd grown to accept that, but the scavengers marauding nearby, baying over remains, she could hear them padding around the camp keeping back from the fire, rarely hungry enough to venture near. Everyone in the settlement knew some women never returned from the bleeding camp, it was impossible to know whether they'd been taken by animals or by another tribe, simply knowing they'd disappeared was unsettling enough. Now she didn't know what she feared most, to be swollen with child, or to bleed and stay a few days at the camp terrified the fire would fail and an animal would carry her away.
During this last season, she'd been at the camp each month, a whole season without a child growing inside her. She grew less fearful with each visit, relished the time with her son, rarely entirely alone, nearly always one or two other women who take the child, give her time to rest, recover her strength, or take her turn at gathering and preparing food.
This time she'd been at the camp by herself, her bleeding skipped two moons, then one night, toward morning, a pain clawing at her inside. She crawls away clutching the infant to her before she disturbs the Leader grunting alongside her on the sleeping hides, hiding herself before the men see her bleeding and beat her the from the caves, stumbling down the path, hastening to find refuge in solitude. For two days she lays while the cramp grips her body eventually to subside, all the while cradling the child, exhausted beyond hearing his cries, aware she should move to the stream, cleanse the child and her own body, lacking strength to make food, to maintain the fire. She watched the fire burn low, closes her eyes, waits for an animal to take her, knowing they are there, watching, waiting, she can smell them on the breeze, hear them brushing through the vegetation.
She wakes with the feel of the child being pulled from her, shrinks back, claws the air to ward off the animal, opens her eyes at the child's plaintive cry. A man silhouetted by moonlight taking the child, turning, walking away from her. She cries out, stretching an arm, and struggles to her knees, too weak to stand, watching his back disappear into the forest, crawling, calling out as the child's pitiful voice weakens with distance. Distraught she slumps forward beating the ground with her forehead, wailing, frightened to move, frightened to witness the child's demise, all hope for his future vanishing with his cry.
She left the settlement a few days earlier. Each moon when the women bled they went to a separate camp in the valley, a few hundred metres from where the narrow path connecting the caves to the valley sprung clinging to the cliff face. The valley camp primarily served as a place where the old and ill waited for scavengers to relieve them of their pain and scatter their bones across the landscape. During their bleeding the women rested nearby, a clearing backed by an outcrop of rocks that shielded the fire from the inquisitive eyes of all but the most daring. She'd been dragged to the place by the Leader's older female when she'd first bled, thought she was being left to die until finding two other women already there.
At first, the place had scared her, not the bleeding, she'd grown to accept that, but the scavengers marauding nearby, baying over remains, she could hear them padding around the camp keeping back from the fire, rarely hungry enough to venture near. Everyone in the settlement knew some women never returned from the bleeding camp, it was impossible to know whether they'd been taken by animals or by another tribe, simply knowing they'd disappeared was unsettling enough. Now she didn't know what she feared most, to be swollen with child, or to bleed and stay a few days at the camp terrified the fire would fail and an animal would carry her away.
During this last season, she'd been at the camp each month, a whole season without a child growing inside her. She grew less fearful with each visit, relished the time with her son, rarely entirely alone, nearly always one or two other women who take the child, give her time to rest, recover her strength, or take her turn at gathering and preparing food.
This time she'd been at the camp by herself, her bleeding skipped two moons, then one night, toward morning, a pain clawing at her inside. She crawls away clutching the infant to her before she disturbs the Leader grunting alongside her on the sleeping hides, hiding herself before the men see her bleeding and beat her the from the caves, stumbling down the path, hastening to find refuge in solitude. For two days she lays while the cramp grips her body eventually to subside, all the while cradling the child, exhausted beyond hearing his cries, aware she should move to the stream, cleanse the child and her own body, lacking strength to make food, to maintain the fire. She watched the fire burn low, closes her eyes, waits for an animal to take her, knowing they are there, watching, waiting, she can smell them on the breeze, hear them brushing through the vegetation.
She wakes with the feel of the child being pulled from her, shrinks back, claws the air to ward off the animal, opens her eyes at the child's plaintive cry. A man silhouetted by moonlight taking the child, turning, walking away from her. She cries out, stretching an arm, and struggles to her knees, too weak to stand, watching his back disappear into the forest, crawling, calling out as the child's pitiful voice weakens with distance. Distraught she slumps forward beating the ground with her forehead, wailing, frightened to move, frightened to witness the child's demise, all hope for his future vanishing with his cry.
Dingus Guy
Literotica Guru
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neonlyte said:
Neon it is hauntingly well written, but your sentences are too long at times. Don't be afraid to make a short sentence. I had a teacher that used to say that to me all the time. It is often hard to let go of an idea and it shows when a sentence can be broken down to 3 sentences. The first sentence, I honestly got lost in and had to reread it 3 times to get the gist of it. There is a spelling mistake toward the end of that one as well.
Second sentence can be like this:
She cries out, stretching an arm, and struggles to her knees. She is too weak to stand, as she watches his back disappear into the forest. Crawling, she calls out as the child's pitiful voice weakens with distance.
I think it is easier on the mind, at least mine. The story has me curious, where is it going?
Dingus
Thanks for your thoughts, always appreciated.
It's still in 'draft' form, I'm changing the tense from past to present, there are mistakes in there to be edited out. I just wanted to get something posted within the spirit of the Challenge time frame.
I take your point on smaller sentences, I'll look at that when I do the re-write.
It's coming along nicely. Do want to edit for me before I post? Be a couple of weeks before I'm ready with a final draft.
neon
Thanks for your thoughts, always appreciated.
It's still in 'draft' form, I'm changing the tense from past to present, there are mistakes in there to be edited out. I just wanted to get something posted within the spirit of the Challenge time frame.
I take your point on smaller sentences, I'll look at that when I do the re-write.
It's coming along nicely. Do want to edit for me before I post? Be a couple of weeks before I'm ready with a final draft.
neon
Dingus Guy
Literotica Guru
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neonlyte said:
You are very welcome. It is just my humble opinion. I am far from an editor as you should know. You might want to find an editor from the list on the Lit board for a professional opinion. Good Luck with the rest of it.
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