Hamletmaschine
This space for rent
- Joined
- Dec 29, 2001
- Posts
- 9,011
No! I’m not talking about losing your virginity here—or anything sexual.
I’m talking about the first time you ever had a ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend’ in the more innocent, puppy-love sense. Who was it? How old were you? How long did it last? How did it end? Do you still see the person or have any interactions with him/her? Do you still carry a soft spot in your heart for the person? Do you sometimes wonder “what if. . . ?”
Fer instance:
Her name was Linda, a dark-haired, dark-eyed, olive-skinned cutie I fought and played with all during elementary school.
I was very shy. Linda was very bold. One day at recess she came over to me and said she liked me and wanted to kiss me. I said no—and probably added something else, like “get away from me you stupid ugly girl,” which meant of course, “I like you, too, but I’m not going to let a girl kiss me here on the playground in front of all the other kids.”
Well, Linda liked a challenge. She waited until recess was over, and when we were all back in our classroom seats again and the teacher was preparing to begin the next lesson, Linda hopped up out of her seat, walked over to mine, and planted a big kiss right on my lips in front of everyone.
The class was up for grabs. The teacher was perhaps more shocked than I was. Linda and I were dispatched to the principal’s office for our punishment, and our parents were called in for a conference. This was very embarrassing, but I was smitten with Linda from that moment on.
Linda and I were known as “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” for the next several years. We played together—sports mostly, since she was a bit of a tomboy--we fought with each other, we talked on the phone with each other, and occasionally we’d hold hands and sneak a kiss or two. Everyone teased us about it and even our parents joked with each other about it. I guess they thought it was cute.
But then the fateful day came in 5th grade when Linda asked me to come and spend the night with her. It was completely innocent, of course. Neither of us knew the first thing about sex, and Linda didn’t understand why she could have her girl friends come for a sleepover and not me, her best friend. I didn’t understand it either. Our parents got together and had a chat, and then my parents had a little chat with me, while Linda’s parents had a chat with her. I learned a bit about the birds ‘n’ the bees that evening—although that stuff made less of an impression on me than the fact that our parents had decided that Linda and I were going to have to stop seeing each other so much.
It was all very confusing at the time, but we were young and adaptable and quickly found other friends to fill the void. When we got into junior high and high school, we rarely saw each other because we’d started running in different circles.
When the birds ‘n’ the bees stuff began to make more sense to me, I often fantasized about trying to get Linda back as a girlfriend. But I never did. Puberty had been very kind to Linda, and she was the best-looking and most popular girl in the school. Consequently, she wouldn’t give the boys in our school the time of day, preferring to go out with older college guys. Puberty had been less kind to me, and I certainly didn’t need to add Linda’s rejection to the mix.
We didn’t say two words to each other throughout high school, and I haven’t seen her since the day we graduated. I heard that Linda’s post-high school life had not been very good: a couple of bad marriages, prostitution, and even a stint in jail.
Several years ago, I went home to visit the folks and ran into Linda’s dad at the grocery store. I asked him how Linda was, but he just shook his head, unable to say anything. After a few more awkard moments, I said goodbye to him and turned to leave, and he blurted out something like, “You know, you were a good boy. Back then, I thought you two would always be together.”
Could have knocked me over with a feather.
I hope you're okay Linda, wherever the hell you are.
I’m talking about the first time you ever had a ‘boyfriend’ or ‘girlfriend’ in the more innocent, puppy-love sense. Who was it? How old were you? How long did it last? How did it end? Do you still see the person or have any interactions with him/her? Do you still carry a soft spot in your heart for the person? Do you sometimes wonder “what if. . . ?”
Fer instance:
Her name was Linda, a dark-haired, dark-eyed, olive-skinned cutie I fought and played with all during elementary school.
I was very shy. Linda was very bold. One day at recess she came over to me and said she liked me and wanted to kiss me. I said no—and probably added something else, like “get away from me you stupid ugly girl,” which meant of course, “I like you, too, but I’m not going to let a girl kiss me here on the playground in front of all the other kids.”
Well, Linda liked a challenge. She waited until recess was over, and when we were all back in our classroom seats again and the teacher was preparing to begin the next lesson, Linda hopped up out of her seat, walked over to mine, and planted a big kiss right on my lips in front of everyone.
The class was up for grabs. The teacher was perhaps more shocked than I was. Linda and I were dispatched to the principal’s office for our punishment, and our parents were called in for a conference. This was very embarrassing, but I was smitten with Linda from that moment on.
Linda and I were known as “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” for the next several years. We played together—sports mostly, since she was a bit of a tomboy--we fought with each other, we talked on the phone with each other, and occasionally we’d hold hands and sneak a kiss or two. Everyone teased us about it and even our parents joked with each other about it. I guess they thought it was cute.
But then the fateful day came in 5th grade when Linda asked me to come and spend the night with her. It was completely innocent, of course. Neither of us knew the first thing about sex, and Linda didn’t understand why she could have her girl friends come for a sleepover and not me, her best friend. I didn’t understand it either. Our parents got together and had a chat, and then my parents had a little chat with me, while Linda’s parents had a chat with her. I learned a bit about the birds ‘n’ the bees that evening—although that stuff made less of an impression on me than the fact that our parents had decided that Linda and I were going to have to stop seeing each other so much.
It was all very confusing at the time, but we were young and adaptable and quickly found other friends to fill the void. When we got into junior high and high school, we rarely saw each other because we’d started running in different circles.
When the birds ‘n’ the bees stuff began to make more sense to me, I often fantasized about trying to get Linda back as a girlfriend. But I never did. Puberty had been very kind to Linda, and she was the best-looking and most popular girl in the school. Consequently, she wouldn’t give the boys in our school the time of day, preferring to go out with older college guys. Puberty had been less kind to me, and I certainly didn’t need to add Linda’s rejection to the mix.
We didn’t say two words to each other throughout high school, and I haven’t seen her since the day we graduated. I heard that Linda’s post-high school life had not been very good: a couple of bad marriages, prostitution, and even a stint in jail.
Several years ago, I went home to visit the folks and ran into Linda’s dad at the grocery store. I asked him how Linda was, but he just shook his head, unable to say anything. After a few more awkard moments, I said goodbye to him and turned to leave, and he blurted out something like, “You know, you were a good boy. Back then, I thought you two would always be together.”
Could have knocked me over with a feather.
I hope you're okay Linda, wherever the hell you are.
