older man / nosy co-workers - advice?

[san_hoshiko]

I've been in a (mostly) long-distance relationship with an older man for a number of years.

He has family in NJ and spends extended holidays with them; that's when I get to see him mostly. We've both kept our relationship a secret from most everyone but our closest friends and when he visits we tend to lay low in my apartment or go out of the city to go to dinner, etc. so I don't have to deal with running into someone I might know.

He's moving here for a short while to deal with some family issues, and I really don't want to have to sneak around or avoid the reality of our relationship. It always seemed wrong to begin with anyway. I'm not ashamed of our age difference but I tend to be a very, very private person and I tend to not trust people easily.

What I'm most concerned with is my co-workers. They're a funky, easy-going lot for the most part but they're *very* nosy and have already remarked on what an enigma I am that I don't seem to ever go out on dates. I know that whether they deal with our age difference well or not (and some of them will) I'm going to have to withstand some teasing about that fact that he's old enough to be my father, etc.

I know that what they think doesn't matter but I feel unprepared to handle all the comments. I tend to be sensitive about things like that...

Anyone have any advice? Should I be glib? Should I have a snappy reply? Any ideas?

Thanks in advance.
Hoshiko

 

[Lancaster]

When Lord Mitsushige was a young boy and was supposed to recite from a copybook for the priest Kaion, he called the other children and acolytes together and said: "Please come here and listen. It is difficult to read if there are hardly any people listening." The priest was impressed by this and said to the acolytes: "That is the spirit in which to do everything."

 

[estevie]

Age is matter of the mind, if you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

Is there any reason to tell your co-workers about your private life? If they are your friends, they should support and be happy that you found love. I believe that love is not easily found, why add restictions or guidelines to what is already hard enough.

I believe that there are reasons we meet the people we meet, that we love the people we love. For whatever reason 'fate' has brought this man into your life. Enjoy it!


Good luck!

 

[lobito]

friends and co-workers are two different things.

Friends will support you, co-workers, while not all, will gossip to the point that it could end up something different than what it is. I tell you this from experience. You just never talk about how much you hate your job, or your private life, to co-workers. You can do both and much more, with your friends though.\

As has been pointed out, do what you feel is right, and nothing else. If you are un-comfortable about what others think, then do you re-think your relationship with him? or with the others? Only you can say what is truely right.

 

[Southern37]

FATE!

I love fate estevie...and agree!

 

[estevie]

Re: FATE!

I love fate estevie...and agree!

don't ya just love that fate, baby! kissses! have a great weekend, lover! see you when i get back!