Married Posters

[mysterion]

Thanks for the great thread.

I am a married man, 36, happily. But our sex life especially since the birth of our daughter has declined considerably. She knows I find satisfaction online, but doesn't know what sites I go to, or how I do it. She probably thinks it is all porn. it is some porn.

I would like to find married women in similar positions, looking for online fun only.

 

[Boobyprize]

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[mysterion]

Drawing the line...

I think for me the line is between fantasy and reality. So long as I am merely fantacizing about someone else, I am fine.
If I truly want to see or be with the other person, then I've crossed THE line.

I imagine that there are others who are looking just for a supplement to the main dish.

 

[mickyp123]

Good question Pebbles my wife classes the computer, te he my laptop as the other woman, she is not interested in computers nor is she computer literate. However it has helped our sex life cos i go upstairs with the hots lol.
I think the chat and flirting is good harmless fun, and the more erotic the better

 

[_pebbles]

Re: i love this thread

Thanks, I'm glad you're enjoying the thread, lex. I flirt whenever I see a man to my liking and the opportunity presents itself. Yes, I'm the one looking back at you in your rear view mirror I like polite and smiley conversation with the young clerks at the grocery store .... feeling landscapers watching me as I jog by in the morning. Yes, I make eye contact. Sometimes my mind will drift to these men while I'm enjoying a little alone time.

I love this thread. Thanks pebbles!

One variant I'd like to hear about: how much flirting, etc. do you do on the sly? I'm not talking about cheating, but about flirting/teasing. For instance, do any ladies like to wear short skirts and cross their legs when they know a guy is looking? Do you try to make eye contact? Do you go home horny and fuck your husband like mad? Does he wonder what made you so horny?

anything along these lines would be great. I fantasize about my wife doing things like this... I also try to be the beneficiary of others' wives when I can.

 

[_pebbles]

Re: sexy sexy sexy

"very", huh? I'm flattered.

Pebbles,

You are one *very* sexy woman. Just thought you'd like to know! LOL.

Lex

 

[_pebbles]

Re: fascinating

Ty, Rooster I've noticed quite a few lurkers have decided to post here. It's always great when people come out of their shell!

Congratulations on a great start to a fascinating thread.

 

[_pebbles]

Here's to hoping the secret stays safe for you, MarkSand.

My wife doesn't know I frequent this site, and I sincerely hope she doesn't find out. We have issues in our marraige and there are certain areas we have tacitly agreed to keep private. But if she were confronted, as the old blues song says, it would be my funeral and her trial...

 

[_pebbles]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: No I haven't told her

Thanks for the sage advice, NYCmale ... but I'm a big girl, I know how to control myself. I'd also like to point out that plastic toys are absolutely no substitute for a real man.

Pebbles, If you are scared of cheating I have only one recommidation....Get some more toys to appease your HEATLHY sex drive.

 

[_pebbles]

Do you still feel you are struggling with the decision to stay faithful, Mike? I agree, the line is blurry once you think a line exists at all and that you may cross it. I'd say for about the first 7 or 8 years of my marriage that I didn't really notice other men in a sexual way. I was totally into my hubby and he was all I needed sexually. Now I'm not so sure.

Its good to hear back from you.
You certainly have gotten an iteresting thread going.
I see that you have posted about your growing temptation, when playing on line, to end up meeting someone and cheating. I am so determined not to cross that line, and at the same time, I have a strong urge to get closer and closer to the line.
There was one time where I really took a risk, actually meeting someone I'd been chatting w/.
I'd told her there was a line I would not cross.
She did not believe me.
Its pretty crazy, I guess. Where is the line, exactly? Its arbitrary.

 

[_pebbles]

Thanks for the encouragement, Wally. I guess my wounds are too fresh to find a new friend just yet. I have other circumstances in real life that are causing me stress and I realize I need to confront that situation and then see where things are for me personally. Ideally, I'm hoping I just bump into a guy through extremely innocent circumstances and then this whirlwind affair will happen. See? I'm still an optimist lol. The upside to starting a friendship, etc. online is that there is time to nurture that new friendship and create trust. This is obviously especially important to married people like us.

I've seen the phrase polyamorous thrown around on this site a bit. I think I may turn out to be one of those. I love my husband and feel I have the capacity to love a potential lover as well.

Don't be jealous, Pebbles. Join us!

Seriously, don't give up on finding that friendship again. I've been hanging out at various boards for much longer than I'd probably like admit. There have been some very intense and very brief encounters... I've not always understood the brief ones, but was never sad they happened.

I think that sometimes we worry too much about what we will do and what we won't do... what's okay, what's not okay... so much so that we just don't see the opportunities right in front of us.

To be a bit philosophical, sometimes we get so worried about whether or not we're going to F*** somebody that we forget to see the person and to experience what is possible.

 

[AV guy II]

Did it turn into a don't ask/don't tell thing because of jealousy? Do you feel your marriage will last since you both are playing with others outside of the marriage? Or do you feel this outlet allows both of you variety without actually cheating?

I'm not worried anymore. We talked things through. The don't ask don't tell came about after I asked her. She wouldn't share, so I dropped the issue. It just seemed to kill her mood.

 

[AV guy II]

*sigh*...the longer I'm on this site, the more people like me I bump into.... My man has no idea i'm on this site. Our sex life is non-existent and I've been using the site to find some erotic stories to think about while masturbating and post some pics to boost my flagging confidence in my own attractiveness. I am incredibly jealous of the open and honest relationships that some people on the site appear to have, but I think there are more here like us....

Pebbles, I know what you mean about getting closer to crossing the line.... but I am starting to believe that life is too short to be unhappy!

I'm sorry to hear that BP. I've seen your posts and I think you're absolutely stunning. I hope you can find happiness.

 

[carrie-on]

I've seen the phrase polyamorous thrown around on this site a bit. I think I may turn out to be one of those. I love my husband and feel I have the capacity to love a potential lover as well.

I live a polyamorous life. I have loved another woman for many years and Yes,my husband knows. He also knows that if it were ever to become an issue where I had to choose one over the other...or if he had a problem with it,that he would come first. She knows this too! It's the same with she and her hubby.

 

[AV guy II]

I live a polyamorous life. I have loved another woman for many years and Yes,my husband knows. He also knows that if it were ever to become an issue where I had to choose one over the other...or if he had a problem with it,that he would come first. She knows this too! It's the same with she and her hubby. [/QUO

That's cool. you're very lucky to have such an agreement.

 

[carrie-on]

I live a polyamorous life. I have loved another woman for many years and Yes,my husband knows. He also knows that if it were ever to become an issue where I had to choose one over the other...or if he had a problem with it,that he would come first. She knows this too! It's the same with she and her hubby. [/QUO

That's cool. you're very lucky to have such an agreement.

Yes we are.The whole key is Trust I think!

 

[AV guy II]

May I ask if your lover gets to join you and Hubby, and does her's have the same privledge?

 

[mysticbob]

Concerning having children and the impact on one’s relationship with the wife. Could anyone point me to a thread specifically addressing the subject on Lit? I’ve a 2 year old and a 5 month old. Our marriage is amazingly strong and devoted but as she has been breast feeding and/or pregnant for a large part of the last 3 years, a once torrid sex life has turned into an infrequent afterthought. Never thought I would turn to Lit for advice but I’d like to see how others are dealing with this. Per the subject of this thread, my wife doesn’t know but certainly wouldn’t care. Especially as she acknowledges that sexually at least, I’ve been sort of sacrificed for the sake of the children who demand all of her time and energy.

 

[azcigar]

I'm a 35 yo married male. When my wife and I first met I was very upfront with my dreams, fantasies and my philosophies on how life is short and why not live it to the fullest. I was very upfront about how I need my mind involved with sex as much as my penis. I have a great imagination that needs to be fed. I was completely honest because I had been married before and was hell bent on not repeating that experience. She felt the same way and our sexlife couldn't have been better. After a few years of marriage my wife now says to me "oh I was hoping it was just a phase you were going through." :-( So, needless to say I now have no outlet for my imagination. I love her dearly. Sex in itself is great. Sex for me though can't be fulfilling if it's routinely just a physical act of getting off. No she doesn't know about lit and know she won't know about it either. I would love to find people to e-mail back and forth. I see it as a way of exercising the demons. Lol

 

[_pebbles]

I would not be able to tolerate a non-existent sex life. Have you told him you're thinking of looking for sex elsewhere? The shock of that revelation may turn things in your favor ... if not, he may give his blessing, you never know. Good luck, boobyprize.

*sigh*...the longer I'm on this site, the more people like me I bump into.... My man has no idea i'm on this site. Our sex life is non-existent and I've been using the site to find some erotic stories to think about while masturbating and post some pics to boost my flagging confidence in my own attractiveness. I am incredibly jealous of the open and honest relationships that some people on the site appear to have, but I think there are more here like us....

Pebbles, I know what you mean about getting closer to crossing the line.... but I am starting to believe that life is too short to be unhappy!

 

[_pebbles]

Mysticbob - as you can see, there are a few other male posters in similar situations. I don't know of a thread discussing it specifically. I would suggest finding a reliable sitter and having a nice evening out once a month. Get all spiffy for her, just like when you first met. Make the effort to do it up ... cologne, maybe flowers for her. Even if you can't afford a fancy restaurant, have a blast at the local bar or something. Feeling that connection of good friendship, romance all leads to awesome sex. If you can't get out, grill her favorite dinner outside after the kids are asleep. Light up the patio with candles ... music .. dance under the stars. *unsolicited advice from the hopeless romantic*

Concerning having children and the impact on one’s relationship with the wife. Could anyone point me to a thread specifically addressing the subject on Lit? I’ve a 2 year old and a 5 month old. Our marriage is amazingly strong and devoted but as she has been breast feeding and/or pregnant for a large part of the last 3 years, a once torrid sex life has turned into an infrequent afterthought. Never thought I would turn to Lit for advice but I’d like to see how others are dealing with this. Per the subject of this thread, my wife doesn’t know but certainly wouldn’t care. Especially as she acknowledges that sexually at least, I’ve been sort of sacrificed for the sake of the children who demand all of her time and energy.

 

[Boobyprize]

.

 

[mickyp123]

Mabe this technology has allowed people to have "cyber affairs" instead of real ones as a half way house or as a safety valve, i mean it would be great if my wife could sit next to me and the both of us getting hot flirting with people.
Booby or pebbles what would your reaction be if your hubby bought you a sex toy, pleased or enraged?

 

[Boobyprize]

Mabe this technology has allowed people to have "cyber affairs" instead of real ones as a half way house or as a safety valve, i mean it would be great if my wife could sit next to me and the both of us getting hot flirting with people.
Booby or pebbles what would your reaction be if your hubby bought you a sex toy, pleased or enraged?

micky.... I have a draw full..... I think most women do these days, don't they? If he bought a new one, for both of us to try, I would be overjoyed....depending on the toy of course....if it was an open-mouthed bj doll, I might have second thoughts!!!

 

[mickyp123]

Mine hasn't and i am sure she would go spare if i did, i agree about the dolls