I don't understand any of this

[Eating_Scarlett]

ALSO!!!!! By introducing all these foreign objects to your sex life, isn't that saying that your partner's body isn't enough to do it for you anymore??

 

[slvjenn]

I don't know if I'd say that...

I don't just drink beer for the taste either

 

[FungiUg]

In the U.S., at least, man-hating lesbians are in the minority. Sure, they exist, and can be brash and rude, but they are by no means the norm. Plenty of gay men dislike (and trash-talk) women and even lesbians. I think it's all counterproductive.

As for not letting lesbians with male children participate in lesbian events, that's kind of extreme. There are some cases - the Michigan Womyn's Festival is one, though their policies may have changed - but socially I haven't heard of this happening.

Cool. Maybe NZ is just behind the times then... I hope so!

 

[slvjenn]

I mean, forgive me for being old fashioned for a second, but isn't sex supposed to be about uniting, and establishing ultimate intimacy and "connecting"? Isn't it not so much about the pleasure and more about the emotional fusion?

Well how old are you going? I mean i thought that sex was supposed to be for procreation.

By adding knives, candles, whips, chains etc aren't you demoralising the act itself, and proving that excitement and physical pleasure means more to you than using sex to express love?

I guess that this again depends on what you consider as 'demoralising' doesn't it?

I mean, by your standards it sounds like you may consider giving head to be demoralizing. If it's not, then why stop there? Why not allow anal? If you're going to allow anal why stop there? what is wrong with using massage oil? (maybe you used some lube for the anal) so if massage oil is ok, why not a feather? If a feather is ok, why not handcuffs? OK, I think you get the picture, but it can keep going.

'cause I don't know much about all this bondage stuff, but while someone's got you over their knee and is flogging you, I can't really imagine how you'd feel like turning around and saying 'I really love you, y'know!!'

Again, this really depends on how you look at it, what you like, what he likes and so on.

I mean if you spank your child, he's likely not going to turn around and tell you how much he loves you. But, isn't the fact that by punishing him your ARE in fact showing your love?

I'm not much into pain, however some people are. I'd have to guess that it is like a lot of other things I've already covored. Has a guy ever pulled your hair while you had sex? Have you ever scratched your nails down his? I can think of a good number of things that people do during 'normal' sex, that would be considered painful if it was done to you at the dinner table.

 

[FungiUg]

ALSO!!!!! By introducing all these foreign objects to your sex life, isn't that saying that your partner's body isn't enough to do it for you anymore??

So you don't use music? Candles? Dinner? Wine?

Sex is about the mind... and the mind loves richness. An elegent seduction is always better than just naked sex. We're not purely animals, we are also thinking creatures. So sex should satisfy the body and the mind.

Sex is what you make of it. And if you have read anything, a healthy relationship encourages experimenting, keeping things fresh and so on.

Sex toys are healthy. People who repress their sexualities are not.

 

[WriterDom]

ALSO!!!!! By introducing all these foreign objects to your sex life, isn't that saying that your partner's body isn't enough to do it for you anymore??

Are you truly that ignorant? Toys can enhance. Sure, what we have works great. But you are missing the big picture.

 

[MissTaken]

Are you truly that ignorant? Toys can enhance. Sure, what we have works great. But you are missing the big picture.

Missing it or intentionally baiting?

As you said, WD, "We're battle tested."

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

I don't repress my sexuality.

I don't see the point in BDSM.

I don't see the point in homosexuality.

I don't see the point in voyeurism or exhibitionists...

Ughghghghghghghgh.

Okay, I'm tired of this now.

Who cares, anyway.

 

[FungiUg]

I mean, forgive me for being old fashioned for a second, but isn't sex supposed to be about uniting, and establishing ultimate intimacy and "connecting"? Isn't it not so much about the pleasure and more about the emotional fusion?

No, that's what a relationship is for. Sex is for exploring physical intimacy, for satisfying carnal desires, for experiencing passion and pleasure. Sex is part of a relationship.

By adding knives, candles, whips, chains etc aren't you demoralising the act itself, and proving that excitement and physical pleasure means more to you than using sex to express love?

By NOT adding those things, aren't you saying that you are so scared of sex that you are not willing to experiment? You are not willing to explore passion and possibilities with your partner? That you don't care about your partner enough to give him or her the most exciting and amazing sex?

'cause I don't know much about all this bondage stuff, but while someone's got you over their knee and is flogging you, I can't really imagine how you'd feel like turning around and saying 'I really love you, y'know!!'

Not everyone likes being spanked. But as it happens, spanking is one of the most common fetishes in the world. Apparently almost every second woman enjoys being spanked!

And if you partner loves being spanked, are you too selfish to go there?

 

[FungiUg]

I don't repress my sexuality.

I don't see the point in BDSM.

I don't see the point in homosexuality.

I don't see the point in voyeurism or exhibitionists...

Ughghghghghghghgh.

Okay, I'm tired of this now.

Who cares, anyway.

Er, you? Since you started the conversation after all.

You're not even TRYING to see the point. As far as I can tell, you only started this conversation so that you could say "you're all a bunch of sickos". But in fact, all you have done is demonstrated your small-mindedness and unwillingness to think outside the square.

I pity your sexual partners. They must be so bored! Tell me, do you see a point in sex at all? (Other than reproduction.)

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

Tell me, do you see a point in sex at all? (Other than reproduction.)

Yeah I do. Forgive me for not demonstrating that by cheering about how you've all opened my eyes to the wonders of a thorough flogging.

I'm in a stable committed relationship with a satisfying sex life and a wonderful partner who doesn't beat me, make me worship him, yell at me, order me about, tie me up, call me names, make me feel bad for not doing everything just the way he likes it under the BULLSHIT pretence that he's teaching me humility, or use knives on my body.

I derive the same intensity from sex as any of you here, and I do it without any derogatory submission or inflicted pain.

 

[slvjenn]

you're ignoring my post....i'm crushed

 

[Ebonyfire]

I don't know why you all bother. It is not interested in education. It is interested in telling us all how wonderful and stable and loving her relationship is.

If that is the case why the hell are you here? Barbie, go play with Ken.

 

[FungiUg]

Yeah I do. Forgive me for not demonstrating that by cheering about how you've all opened my eyes to the wonders of a thorough flogging.

I'm in a stable committed relationship with a satisfying sex life and a wonderful partner who doesn't beat me, make me worship him, yell at me, order me about, tie me up, call me names, make me feel bad for not doing everything just the way he likes it under the BULLSHIT pretence that he's teaching me humility, or use knives on my body.

So if all of this is true, I have to ask... why are you here asking about BDSM?

And by the way, I have never flogged anyone, used knives on anyone or whipped or humiliated anyone. Your ignorance in assuming we all like that is showing -- which once again shows me you have learnt nothing. So again, why did you start this conversation if you aren't actually interested in learning?

I derive the same intensity from sex as any of you here, and I do it without any derogatory submission or inflicted pain.

...And how do you know that? Since you've not tried it! But if it's true, then again why are you here?

 

[FungiUg]

I don't know why you all bother.

Some of us are suckers for pain, Eb.

 

[Ebonyfire]

Some of us are suckers for pain, Eb.

You are giving it a fair shot. I just have no patience for trolls. Unless they are steamed then served cold with champagne.

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

You are giving it a fair shot. I just have no patience for trolls. Unless they are steamed then served cold with champagne.

Your attitude is a fucking JOKE. Are you referring to me as 'it' because I don't agree with the majority here? Because I say what I think and don't sugar-coat everything so it's fucking easier for you to swallow?

Do I become a troll because I disagree with your opinion, Oh Mighty One?

Give me a break. I'm here asking questions out of curiosity. I'm ATTEMPTING to learn, despite everyone here bashing me because I ask questions that aren't pleasing. Because I'm not hit by a flash of understanding about the lifestyle, because I DARE question it?

Personally I think YOU should be fucking steamed and then just left to rot.

When someone doesn't agree with something you say, perhaps you should learn to DEAL WITH IT.

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

So if all of this is true, I have to ask... why are you here asking about BDSM?

Sadly, the truth to your question is probably not what you were hoping for. I was bored on the GB, thought I'd check out a few other places for a change, read a few posts on this board, got curious and posted. I don't harbour any secret desires to become a slave to my man or anything.

Does that answer your qu?

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

you're ignoring my post....i'm crushed

*hands you 40c*

 

[slvjenn]

i dunno what 40c is...but

the reason why you are treated the way you are is exactly what you're doing...

if people give you an actual answer to your question you ignore it and just start trolling again

 

[Eating_Scarlett]

i dunno what 40c is...but

the reason why you are treated the way you are is exactly what you're doing...

if people give you an actual answer to your question you ignore it and just start trolling again

No, I generally acknowlege the answer. I *do* take it in. I just have a lot of questions to ask.

 

[slvjenn]

Here, I've reposted every question that you've had since my last post. This way everyone can be sure to answer them and help you in your quest for knowledge.

re you referring to me as 'it' because I don't agree with the majority here?

Because I say what I think and don't sugar-coat everything so it's fucking easier for you to swallow?

Do I become a troll because I disagree with your opinion, Oh Mighty One?

Because I'm not hit by a flash of understanding about the lifestyle, because I DARE question it?

Does that answer your qu?

 

[FungiUg]

Sadly, the truth to your question is probably not what you were hoping for. I was bored on the GB, thought I'd check out a few other places for a change, read a few posts on this board, got curious and posted. I don't harbour any secret desires to become a slave to my man or anything.

Does that answer your qu?

So when bored, shit-stir? Oh well, works for some I guess. Particularly those who like being verbally dumped. on (can you say "masochistic"?)

You're very judgemental, close-minded, and frankly offensive. I didn't think you harboured secret intentions of any nature. I did ask you why you came here and wanted to know about BDSM if you had no intention of even trying to make sense of what we are saying. "Bored" isn't an answer really. I mean, the internet is a big place -- there's lots to do if you were bored. So why come here, and why make inquiries, if you are not at all interested in the answers?

My suspicion is simply this: you like to create trouble.

 

[FungiUg]

No, I generally acknowlege the answer. I *do* take it in. I just have a lot of questions to ask.

Well, perhaps you shouldn't "ask" your questions is such an offensive manner? If you genuinely want to learn, making loud proclamations about how sick we all are, and assumptions that we are all into S&M won't get you very far.

 

[StarCandies]

I can’t really say anything that anyone hasn’t told you, however being as this topic was the final nail in the coffin on the subject of joining this little community I fell obliged to add my two cents. First you seem to assume subs are all female… well they’re not and I’m living proof. (Yay for me *grins*) You also seem to assume submission has something to do with pride or self worth. I’m I have a highly developed ego and sense of self.
I will not try to justify myself to you or make some odd analogy involving cold cuts or what I ate for dinner last night (although those are pretty funny you must admit) you and I are somehow fundamentally different. I could not be in your sort of relationship I tried it and something is missing I don’t know what that something is but if I ever figure that out you’ll be the first to know.
As for why I would ever submit my self to any sort of mistress it’s the total lack of control I feel and the emotions that come with it nameless as they are. I don’t subscribe to any of the leather and lace clichés you might see in some cheap porn or in some stories. I hate clichés and they don’t exist in any of my fantasies although I might allow some of them if the person I was with needed them to achieve their fulfillment because I’d love that person. So I would allow to be beaten or subjected to whatever else in return for the feelings of fulfillment they give me that I can only get from someone with they’re disposition (and a lovely disposition it is ^_^) so its an equal trade.
Please understand that there is a high level of respect and appreciation with both parties as we as people tend to be bit abnormal and thus have trouble finding people who share our various abnormalities so when we do we tend to adore and cherish that person, we know how rare and precious are partners are and we want to hold on to them. Many people will never find someone to share this feeling with and we know it. The relationship between sub and dom borders on an almost holy thing to many of us.
That said I’m tried of empathizing with you (sleepy in general actually -_-) I really don’t like you wanting to shoot me or putting me in the same category as a pedophile. I won’t call you a troll (I’m sorry I’ve never seen a troll with that many posts) but you are being pretty unkind. Oh and to everyone else please feel free to privet message me about what I’ve said or just to say hello and make me feel welcome I’d like someone to talk anyways ok ^_^