Flirting with Those Who are "Taken"

[juicylips]

Do you flirt as much with people who you know are in relationship on the boards, or do you back off and not feel comfortable with doing that?


How about those of you who are taken, do you have any problems watching your partner flirt? Is there an imaginary line you two draw as to how far you will something go with another person?

Just curious, as usual
Cassidy

 

[Vivacia]

I am an incurable flirt - I will flirt with anyone - so long as I don't stamp on toes (or tails in Draco's case).

I see it as a bit of good clean fun, but my partner is older than me and doesn't see it quite the same. He doesn't mind too much me flirting online, but if I am out and I flirt with say a barman he doesn't like it as to him he thinks I am being unfaithful...I think he sees flirting as a)expressing an interest in someone sexually and B) advertising that I am available.

 

[MidnightAngel]

Cassidy, I've wondered about this, too. Personally, I'll flirt with just about anyone. However, I would be more careful of exactly what I said to someone who had an SO on the board.

Since I don't have an SO on the board (anymore), I can't answer the second part. When I did have, it wouldn't have bothered me at all.

 

[Bindii]

I'm a born flirt, its as natural to me as breathing. I flirt on the board and I flirt in real life. At first this bothered my guy, but he has come to realise that its a part of my personality that can't (won't) be changed. Now he actually gets a giggle out of it.
To me flirting is harmless fun, there is a line that shouldn't be crossed, (well not if you want to keep it harmless anyway)and I am always careful not to overstep it.

 

[Slinky'sWench]

I am an incurable flirt - I will flirt with anyone - so long as I don't stamp on toes (or tails in Draco's case).

I see it as a bit of good clean fun, but my partner is older than me and doesn't see it quite the same. He doesn't mind too much me flirting online, but if I am out and I flirt with say a barman he doesn't like it as to him he thinks I am being unfaithful...I think he sees flirting as a)expressing an interest in someone sexually and B) advertising that I am available.

want me to get on the next train up

 

[plasticman33]

It's OK to flirt and tease! I do it all the time. I has no serious affect on my relationship!

 

[alltherage]

Do you flirt as much with people who you know are in relationship on the boards, or do you back off and not feel comfortable with doing that?


How about those of you who are taken, do you have any problems watching your partner flirt? Is there an imaginary line you two draw as to how far you will something go with another person?

Just curious, as usual
Cassidy

OMG you mean to say that some people here are actually taken. Oh the guilt, the horror, I am doomed, doomed, what would Sister Angelica say about me now. Oh god, I am doomed to die a slut. Oh woe is me. Woe, woe, woe i say, woe is me.

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: Flirting with Those Who are "Taken"

OMG you mean to say that some people here are actually taken. Oh the guilt, the horror, I am doomed, doomed, what would Sister Angelica say about me now. Oh god, I am doomed to die a slut. Oh woe is me. Woe, woe, woe i say, woe is me.

Yea, it's a real SHOCKER....LMAO


If you are doomed, then I am right behind ya, babe

Cassidy

 

[tn_8tiv]

I flirt with everyone...even though when someone is in a relationship with another on the board I try to acknowledge them.

Crap, if you can't flirt, why post?

 

[JennyOmanHill]

Do you flirt as much with people who you know are in relationship on the boards, or do you back off and not feel comfortable with doing that?
How about those of you who are taken, do you have any problems watching your partner flirt? Is there an imaginary line you two draw as to how far you will something go with another person?
Just curious, as usual
Cassidy

I have thought of this too, Cassidy. I do sense that some posters avoid direct confrontation with me, yet there are a few who will tease me and neither Oman nor I have trouble with that. I have never purposely tried to flirt with anyone, but sometimes a witty response is so tempting! Flirting is fun on the boards and does not always indicate anything going on behind the scenes or in pm's.

Oman doesn't post nearly as much because of his work schedule, but I enjoy the boards as he reads what I post and it only helps him learn more about me, and it just adds to what we talk about when we connect at night.

I have stopped going into the chat area however unless I'm purposely trying to get in touch with someone, and usually when Oman is already there. I have absolutely no interest in cybering or getting involved in any other forum than sharing thoughts and opinions on the boards.

 

[Cheyenne]

Re: Re: Flirting with Those Who are "Taken"

OMG you mean to say that some people here are actually taken. Oh the guilt, the horror, I am doomed, doomed, what would Sister Angelica say about me now. Oh god, I am doomed to die a slut. Oh woe is me. Woe, woe, woe i say, woe is me.

Good one!

I assume many of the posters here are married. That's about as "taken" as you can get. But they are still here flirting and I have no problem with that, it is a porn board! What else would anyone expect?

The thing I find particularly interesting is that sometimes the "online" relationships seem to be considered MORE important than the RL marriages. Jealousy on the part of an online SO on the board is funny when you think about it if one or both of the people involved in the online relationship are already married in RL. That seems wacky, or maybe that's just me.

Now, if both people in the online relationship are single and it seems to be something that is serious, I probably would take a hint from how they conduct themselves on the board. If they flirt with others, I wouldn't feel bad flirting with them (think Juspar/Myst.) If they really seem to be into just each other and seem to want no outsiders involved, I would respect that and would not flirt with them.

 

[ShamelessFlirt]

I flirt for fun and profit ...lol

The name says it all, no?

Seriously though, there's an expression a friend threw at me once that stuck with me since, he said "Many a truth is said in jest".

Flirting can be fun, but it can also crush an ego when it's misread (which I understand can sometimes be intentional). So when I flirt I try and make sure that the person knows I'm a wiseass before I get too flirty, that way they know not to take me seriously. I also try and let the other person set the tone so I don't offend.

 

[sigh]

i guess it depends on what flirting is...in real life you all would probably call me a flirt...i have a quick smile and something of a saucy demeanor...it's something unconscious but i'm not sure it's flirting...it's just me...i was raised with smiles and told to be nice to everyone and that's what i do...my mom revels in ironic humor and it passed on to me

if i am flirting, i'm an equal opportunity flirt because i do it with everyone


odd though, i don't really do it so much in here...those who knew me in chat saw it all the time, but in here i tend to peel a couple of layers away and let you peek at a different level of me

 

[sexy-girl]

i think mild flirting is ok ... but i dont flirt as much now as if maybe i was single perhaps (although i've never been a huge flirt anyway)


i agree with what cheyenne said i find it weird when people heve online relationships when they are in a real life realationship ... i also agree it depends on conduct of people ... i think i leave it open that i dont mind some flirting on here

 

[JennyOmanHill]

I flirt for fun and profit ...lol
The name says it all, no?
Seriously though, there's an expression a friend threw at me once that stuck with me since, he said "Many a truth is said in jest".
Flirting can be fun, but it can also crush an ego when it's misread (which I understand can sometimes be intentional). So when I flirt I try and make sure that the person knows I'm a wiseass before I get too flirty, that way they know not to take me seriously. I also try and let the other person set the tone so I don't offend.

How did I guess you were a "wiseass"?

You are a fabulous writer as well, and you and your lady have been great support for Oman and I. Thanks again.

 

[Wiggles]

This is the way I look at it. I'm taken, I flirt with people on this board, mildly. I don't take any of it that seriously. I really don't think that my flirting will change their relationship in any way.

I'm not too sure who all is in an online relationship, so I can't say for sure if I'm flirting with them, because I don't know exactly who they are. I don't think I've flirted with anyone in an online relationship, but that's not to say I wouldn't.

I think my lines are more clearly drawn in RL. I don't flirt with anybody that's taken, period. Actually, I don't flirt that much at all unless I have romantic intentions toward that person. Since I'm in a relationship right now, I don't flirt with anybody in RL.

I look at these boards as fun, I'm going to have fun here. Hopefully not screwing up anybody's relationships. I don't think I wield that kind of power, so I don't have any problems with it.

 

[luv2tvl69]

Do you flirt as much with people who you know are in relationship on the boards, or do you back off and not feel comfortable with doing that?


How about those of you who are taken, do you have any problems watching your partner flirt? Is there an imaginary line you two draw as to how far you will something go with another person?

Just curious, as usual
Cassidy

I dont mind mild "harmless flirting" with people on the boards by either dryfus or myself. I dont think people in a relationship should flirt with someone they had been physically and emotionally intimate with someone like an ex-lover, as that would be crossing a line. We are both flirty people and find alot of the members here quite attractive and sexy and we have no problem appreciating other peoples attractiveness. Also as long as both partners are aware of each others board flirting its fine. If it becomes some secretive thing, then there could be deeper issues and it would most likely cause a problem.

Also it is important for the ones flirting to make it clear they have a partner and it is just flirting.

I dont think people in a relationship should cyber with others unless their partners know and are ok with it, or if the couple is looking to have multiple partner cybersex. But I would say the same about physical sex as well. I guess the big thing is that its all in the open and not hurting each others feelings and that all involved are ok with the arrangement.

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

I do it cause I get unconfterble sometimes, so I flirt jokingly with others. but mostly only with those I know fairly well. If they are single or not I'll still flirt but I won't go over the line, with everyone there is difference of how far you can go so some people I'll go fearther then others.

Do I mind of my girl flirts with others?
Nope, I know none of it is serious. Even if she is doing it with me right there... I don't care.

 

[T.H. Oughts]

I flirt, he flirts.....we are only talking flirting here arn't we

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: Flirting with Those Who are "Taken"

Also it is important for the ones flirting to make it clear they have a partner and it is just flirting.

I dont think people in a relationship should cyber with others unless their partners know and are ok with it, or if the couple is looking to have multiple partner cybersex. But I would say the same about physical sex as well. I guess the big thing is that its all in the open and not hurting each others feelings and that all involved are ok with the arrangement.

What a can of worms you just opened, hon.

Flirting is one thing, I agree. Cybering is just one step further or is it? Are you saying that is the line you don't cross if you are involved with someone online?

We could get into all kinds of debates here on r/l marriages vs. online relationships. I don't want to see that. I was just asking about flirting with someone who you KNEW has an ONLINE partner. We have quite a few couples on this board. I was just curious as if you approached these people differently than you do those you know are single.

Cassidy

 

[Guest]

I am married, and therefore "taken".
I flirt mildly and I do not, in the least bit, mind reciprocation.
I have a wonderfully open and honest relationship with my husband. He is aware of this board, the people, and most of what goes on. He has even read threads and posts.
I just do not do anything, within my life, that I would find hurtful done to me.
I hope that makes sense. I have med-head today. *lol*

 

[Cath!]

I flirt with anyone and everyone...personally, I don't care IF they are taken or not...I don't care if they are male or female...BUT will I attempt to take the flirting OFF the boards? nope...

 

[plasticman33]

I flirt with anyone and everyone...personally, I don't care IF they are taken or not...I don't care if they are male or female...BUT will I attempt to take the flirting OFF the boards? nope...

 

[lobito]

I flirt with anyone and everyone...personally, I don't care IF they are taken or not...I don't care if they are male or female...BUT will I attempt to take the flirting OFF the boards? nope...

ahem...

so anyway, as I was going to say, I'm the board HO, I flirt with anything that moves. I don't care what people think, do or say. If the people flirting are ok with it, then who else should care?

Lo

 

[modest mouse]

Chey,

Well said, the thought about 'online' relationships taking precedence over RL ones shows how much we segragate our world, at times.

***

Lobito,

Don't play, I'm the only one that matters.