Feminine Men vs Alpha Males

[Killswitch]

Ok........I consider myself to be an Alpha Male. (see Sexy_ Girls thread for descriptions and discussions)

Being an Alpha Male, I have noticed a real trend for a lot of males to be very "Feminine Acting" these days. The way they talk, conduct themselves, walk, hold their hands, and the overly tight bonds with their mothers, etc etc.

It has long been my belief that there really isnt anything that can turn a woman off to a man more, than having him be Feminine, as opposed to Alpha, and or Macho. ( Macho may be a poor descrpition but you get my drift).

I am not denying that an Alpha Male can be and should be compassionate and sensative....that is not where I am headed here. Men can and should have a soft side, but the proliferation of Feminine men, screaming with "Femininity" these days is very apparent to me.

Ladies.....What do you think of a man that exudes an extreme Feminine attitude and demeanor?


"David"

 

[perks]

Effeminate qualities are based on traditional gender specific roles that are slowly losing their place in society.

I'm an alpha woman.

 

[MissTaken]

I haven't noticed an up surge in "feminine men"lately. However, I live in the middle of nowhere where the guy with the biggest pick up truck is Mayor.

As far as men who appear to have feminine traits, qualities or behaviors?

When it is natural for them to behave in such a fashion, I don't mind. Honestly, I have met men who seemed to work very hard at presenting in a feminine manner and to those men, I say "Pffft."

I no more want to see a man practice and adopt femine traits than I want to see anyone try to present as something they aren't.

Again, there are men who may have femine traits that have developed as a part of their environment, may be hereditary or whatever. In that situation, it makes no matter to me.

 

[roxanne69]

I went out with a very feminine looking man for 4 yrs. He looked so much like a girl that often people were suprised when they heard his voice and realized he was not a girl. (he had really long hair too which made him more femmy). He was no less a "man" than any other man I have ever met. I like people, alpha or not if they are beautiful inside. Macho men are repulsive to me and I don't equate them with alpha males.

I don't consider you to be an alpha male at all KS. (sorry) I just don't see you as a leader or charismatic. Men like Lance who are brilliant, magnetic and charismatic are alpha males.

 

[Killswitch]

Note: I am speaking specifically of apparently straight, that is to say men that are not Gay.

"David"

 

[Killswitch]

Miss T....would you marry one?

Roxanne....you dont even know me.

 

[His_kitty]

Well while I don't think that I'm attracted to one particular type of man... looking back I do recognize that those I have been with and the most attracted too, are Alphamale.

And yes some - one in particular- used that term to describe himself.

He was never jealous, just an Alphamale. *snort*

 

[Lasher]

Ladies.....What do you think of a man that exudes an extreme Feminine attitude and demeanor?

That last line is pretty self-serving. Usually the "extreme" are going to be a very small portion.

Would make more sense to discuss the changes in male behaviour over the last 50 years or so - the effects of media and changing female roles and things of that nature.

But if you want to bash people for being different that's fine too.

 

[Cheyenne]

Men like Lance who are brilliant, magnetic and charismatic are alpha males.

Hey, you're not his girlfriend, by any chance, are ya? That would explain your answer, since Love is Blind.

 

[lavender]

I just choked on a chicken bone - even though I haven't eaten chicken in a week.

 

[Killswitch]

Re: Re: Feminine Men vs Alpha Males

But if you want to bash people for being different that's fine too.

Ok lets get this out of the way right now.....I do not tend to think a man being Effeminate is a good thing, but where in the hell did I bash anyone here?

I have not.....so get off it.

 

[intrigued]

I haven't made the same observations as you, KS, so it's hard for me to say.
I think being alpha for either gender has less to do with the way you look or sound or walk, and more to do with the way you think, with what is inherent to your personality.

Just scrolled down, I think I need a paramedic.

 

[Lasher]

Re: Re: Re: Feminine Men vs Alpha Males

I have not.....so get off it.

You mean other than your condescending tone and "I'm better than they are and you want me" attitude?

Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it's not there.

 

[MissTaken]

Miss T....would you marry one?

Yes, for all of the right reasons, of course. You know, love and all that goes with it.

I want to add that a man who poses with a faux macho exterior is likely to get the "Pfft!" as well.

IN fact, fake machoisme is more annoying to me than fake femininity.

 

[intrigued]

Re: Re: Re: Feminine Men vs Alpha Males

Ok lets get this out of the way right now.....I do not tend to think a man being Effeminate is a good thing, but where in the hell did I bash anyone here?

I have not.....so get off it.

I don't seee that you have either.

 

[Killswitch]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Feminine Men vs Alpha Males

You mean other than your condescending tone and "I'm better than they are and you want me" attitude?

Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it's not there.

Condescending tones?

I am either noticing a real trend here on these boards for hyper sensativity, and reading improperly between the lines or I just simply do not know how to ask a question of substance properly.

Would I still sound condescending if I was comparing and asking questions about Briefs vs thongs?

 

[deliciously_naughty]

Ladies.....What do you think of a man that exudes an extreme Feminine attitude and demeanor?


"David"

actually, nothing turns me off faster than the traditional alpha male...beer swilling, sports watching, dominating sweaty male.

What we consider "feminine" and "masculine" behavoir is a societal construct.

What I prefer in a partner is a rapier wit, a sensitive soul, and an open mind (preferably one occupied with Bab 5, computers, and such)

 

[His_kitty]

I don't consider you to be an alpha male at all KS. (sorry) I just don't see you as a leader or charismatic. Men like Lance who are brilliant, magnetic and charismatic are alpha males.

K I'm sorry but I have to disagree with you.

I do see that Killswitch is a caring Alpha Male

-He gets along with family and friends, is considerate and thoughtful in his actions, and his biggest priority, like every good Alpha Male, is *you*. The thought of you coming to any discomfort often prevents him from engaging in more typical Alpha Male behavior and thushe is generally exempt from mood swings and bursts of silence. However, caring does not equal sharing to this Alpha Male and when he feels anyone is trying to come between you, his less than genial side begins to show.

Does this not fit him to a T? If not then perhaps people haven't taken the time to get to know him all that well. KS never purposefully tries to hurt someone's feelings, sadly this isn't common enough in people.

Now on the other hand, can you identify others that may fall into this category of Alpha Maleness?

Wild Card Alpha Male-- Generally seen as the 'self absorbed', 'eccentric', and 'highly sexual', this Alpha Male usually isn't associated with monogamy. However, once he does settle on someone they should consider themselves either blessed or cursed. His behavior can often be unpredictable, irrational, and quite bizarre in nature, and as the object of his affection, you will soon find it impossible to escape. And yet, underneath the egoism and the absentmindedness, it is very apparent that it won't do to have you taken away from him, or leave for that matter.



*shrug*

 

[Lancecastor]

I see most of the same people who were critical of anyone who dared describe themselves as alpha males in the other thread have moved over here to bash Killswitch for trying to define and talk about men other than alphamales.

You're a hard lot...good thing you're not alphas.

Ha!

Al Gore hired Naomi Wolf in 1999 to try and convert his "Beta Male" image into that of an "Alpha" as you may recall...whereupon Trent Lott, when asked, said he was a Delta (Mississippi Delta) Male.

Perhaps the "Alan Alda", Sensitive New Age Guy (SNAG) is a Beta Male.

Perhaps what KS describes as effems are really warm Betas.

Maybe Lasher's one of those "it's all good" totally gender neutral dudes that has no objection to going down on a guy now and then and is bristling at being called a fag on the sly by KS.

Who knows?

Who cares?

Classifying people into groups via generalities is risky business.

As with all things Lit, the safest route is to say what you believe in.

That being said.....

What's up with all the 20-something panty-waist boys out there nowadays?

To what do you ascribe the generation of wussies coming up?

Is it simply gender roles melding further?


Lance

 

[His_kitty]

I haven't made the same observations as you, KS, so it's hard for me to say.
I think being alpha for either gender has less to do with the way you look or sound or walk, and more to do with the way you think, with what is inherent to your personality.

Just scrolled down, I think I need a paramedic.

Do I need to call 911 for you and Lavender? ;-)

 

[Killswitch]

Very good post Kitten. But ...I have been known to on occassion hurt someones feelings on purpose. I think we all have and do on occassion.

I would also like to have everyone take notice here that we have a fair amount of Lesbian females on lit. It would not surprise me if the Lesbian women would be more apt to accept an Effeminate man than a straight or perhaps casual bi sexual woman.

I also take a small amount of offense at the Alpha males are " Beer Guzzling, Sports watching, dominant sweaty males"
There are those to be sure. But I dont think that using those terms to describe an Alpha Male is fair in the least.

 

[Frimost]

Remember KS, any questions posed to Lit. are questions posed to a specialized, niche, cross-section of our general population.
IOW, horny bastards like ourselves, both male and female, that is why you will get a MUCH larger percentile of bi's here because bi's IMO are much more sexually adventurous which is how they found there way to this board in the first place (most likely looking for good sex stories to masturbate too and what not).

So if you wanted the question to reflect more of the general, heterosexual female population some other board would probably be better suited for your purpose. Besides, I think bi and bi-curious women probably don't like the traditional Alpha-males nearly as much as the average demur heterosexual women because they themselves are sexually aggressive so they don't like taking a backseat in the relationship. That's my opinion on this anyway, maybe I'm wrong but you would probably get allot more women agreeing with you on some more popular but also more mundane and less-interesting boards (with less fellow pervs) somewhere else.

 

[CoolidgEffect]

The word dominant is the perfect descriptor of the Alpha.

They determine who eats what and when. They determine who fucks who and when.

And you dare look me straight in the eyes or this monkey will go ape on you!

 

[His_kitty]

Very good post Kitten. But ...I have been known to on occassion hurt someones feelings on purpose. I think we all have and do on occassion.

Aye true.


But I don't feel as though its something that you aim for, repeatedly.

We all strike out now and again if we feel hurt, anger, and/or jealousy. Does it make it right? No. But we are human after all... filled with flaws.

What is important though, to me, is whether or not we learn from our mistakes and try to not keep repeating such behaviours.

That trite lil saying... we hurt the ones we love the most... has a lot of accuracy in it. In part because we know they accept us already and love us.

Anyways... mini hijack over.

 

[Killswitch]

I see most of the same people who were critical of anyone who dared describe themselves as alpha males in the other thread have moved over here to bash Killswitch for trying to define and talk about men other than alphamales.

You're a hard lot...good thing you're not alphas.




Classifying people into groups via generalities is risky business.

As with all things Lit, the safest route is to say what you believe in.

That being said.....

What's up with all the 20-something panty-waist boys out there nowadays?

To what do you ascribe the generation of wussies coming up?

Is it simply gender roles melding further?


Lance

Perky claims that traditional gender specific roles are slowly losing their place in society.

Cloning?
Gender specifics being abandoned?

Are men dinasours?

500 years from now.....will men be alive only in History Books?

Or will we be some sort of androgenous society?



"David"