Fears and what they inspire.

[CattySwinger]

I'm eighteen years old, but even though I'm by all legal rights and means and adult, and I'm married... for some reason I still have a childish fear of the dark. I mean... I can sleep in a dark room, I don't need a nightlight or some such thing, but when I'm just sitting alone in a room that's pitch, even with the light of the computer screen I get creeped out. I always have to go turn some form of light on, if I'm awake in the dark. Sometimes, when I'm alone at night, and I want to go downstairs to get a glass of water, I will turn on every light in the house on my way down, and then turn them off on my way up, jumping from patch of light, to patch of light as the darkness swallows everything behind me. I've been doing this since I was a kid. Even now that I'm married and an adult, and etc, etc... it hasn't stopped.

But, for some reason, because of my fear, I get the inspiration to write. I write poetry, stories, essays, thoughts... all when I feel the hairs on the back of my neck sticking up because I'm sitting in a dark room typing at the computer. It's strange, but the fear causes me to focus on creativity.

This is a poem I wrote in less than ten minutes, with the thought of fear running through my head.

Is anyone else inspired by fear?

Shadows Walk

When I'm alone in the dark, I shiver and I shake
The shadows plague me, rub me wrong
The kind of awful feeling, that keeps your mind awake
I close my eyes, sing quiet songs

I can not breath, I can not stir
My mind becomes a shaken blur
I'm like a child in the night
I cry beneath my blankets and
full of nervousness and fright
beg for someone's gentle hand

Can't see what causes me to fear
As demons strike me in my sleep
And it gets worse with every year
Secrets haunt me from the deep
End this fear that burns my heart
It is tearing me apart


--Kitten

 

[phrodeau]

Consider yourself lucky that fear doesn't paralyze you, and you are able to focus your feelings toward your creativity.

I've only been able to find that kind of inspiration when lovelorn.

 

[CattySwinger]

Bitterness is the food of creativity.

I have been inspired greatly by loss, but fear is a more... consistant form of focus. Being lovelorn has a tendency to limit the things that you write or create about.

 

[tendril]

I'm 49 and still totally hate 'the dark'

 

[Rex1960]

I'm 49 and still totally hate 'the dark'

I'm 43 and with a gown like that you'd probably..... nevermind

Maybe I shouldn't talk about dark desires here

 

[tendril]

Maybe I shouldn't talk about dark desires here

Surely that's a contradiction in terms....I mean this is LIT or have I stumbled onto the wrong board

 

[Lost Cause]

Without fear, things would be boring..

Without that quickening of the pulse, the hightened sense of hearing, and the gidiness of going through it safely, with all the imagination that creates fear.
99% of the time, the fear we perceive is no where close to the reality of the imagined happening.

 

[intrigued]

Re: Without fear, things would be boring..

Without that quickening of the pulse, the hightened sense of hearing, and the gidiness of going through it safely, with all the imagination that creates fear.
99% of the time, the fear we perceive is no where close to the reality of the imagined happening.

Yep! *nodsnods*

Welcome CattySwinger!

 

[Lost Cause]

Imagine...

A world with no thrill rides, bungee jumping, or instinctual fear that warns you of possible death with your activity. (the "6th Sense")

 

[SweetCherry]

Don't feel bad. I refuse to go into my own basement after dark. I have this obsession that somethign is going to reach from under the steps and grab my ankles. I hate the dark as well, tho not to the point where I need a nite lite to sleep. If the power goies out tho and I lose the lights, I have been known to scream and freak out.

 

[CattySwinger]

Thanks for all the support, and yes, I do feel welcome. Still, what other fears do you guys have? The dark is my worst, but I have others, I have a small fear of the ocean... I'm always afraid of drowning or getting pulled out in a rip current, that, and it just creeps me out when my feet don't touch the water anymore, I always think about what's lurking beneath me.