Do you REALLY get upset by the stuff you read at lit?

[Rambrat]

I am sensitive you know...

 

[intrigued]

Good post Intrigued.

I took out a part of your original post that even to this day makes me dumbfounded. I suppose it is the "they" we were raised with. The people we never actually meet that have some control over our lives because we give it to them. The "they" your parents used to keep your scores up in school and on the straight and narrow. If you do not do this "they" will not approve. It is a great mystery however people fall into this way of thinking seeking approval.

Do I at times, yes for I am human however I do have the knowledge of who I have met and who I haven't as well as those I would like to meet and those I wouldn't. I have said before in the past seeing is believing until then I am skeptical. I hold dear the friendships I have met from lit. The countless hours on chat, im, phone, emails I have exchanged with so many. Then the times I have been able to physically hold those that have made an impression on me. People tend to forget that we are human beings. Some take the boards as a game while others take the time out to get to know another. Such diversity here that we are bound to clash.

It does upset me that I am more cautious to develop new friendship through here because of so many personal stuff divulged over the last couple of months. Like I said within this thread I feel like I have my guard up recently and I do not appreciate it. So it is a new way of approaching things based on the fact that others utilize this board as an interactive game.

I do think that some are seeking approval. Whose approval I do not know but within them they are seeking "their's". That is my impression.

Peace,
Tulip
* again thank you for your thoughts. I know there are so many points that can be discussed but this should do for now.

Tulip, from what you said, I do think you understood what I meant, but I want to clarify.
It is human nature to a degree to seek approval, even validation. When I posted my pics, I was seeking approval in a very "base" way, even though that wasn't my ultimate goal.
What I was referring to is why is it important to gain approval from the masses when they are anonymous peeps that have no direct bearing on our lives in a significant way? And even more so, what the possible ramifications could be, if we don't win their approval? That they *tremble* don't "like" us?? That they will "talk about us behind our back"? They they won't post to us? That they will drop us from their "clique"?
My comments were with regard to our posting style, how we behave when we post. I'm certainly not talking about interactions with people we have relationships with, but were I, still I believe you have to keep a perspective with regard to what really matters...what we believe, and not what will gain approval.

You said "the people we never actually meet that have some control over our lives because we give it to them". I do not know how else to express this, but I don't understand this concept...why would anyone do that willingly? You're right, if people we've never met have control over us, its damn certain it is because we gave it to them, and we alone are to blame, and we alone are in control of the fact that it happened. Best get that control back....
This is an extreme example, a tangent of what I meant above, but posting my pics was an act of giving up control. In essence, that is what happened. I did not consciously decide that I would screw myself silly by giving up control and inviting the possibility for what Hanns did, but once it happened, I did the right thing. I stopped sharing my pics, blocked access to my site and deleted my thread...I regained control. In this sense, I certainly can relate to what you said about your reluctance to develop new friendships here. When you've been burned, its hard to forget those lessons. I came here "wide open" and naive, but that part of me is no longer available. Its sad in a sense, but for the best.

I hope you understand what I mean, a little better? I still struggle with alot of things, in no way do I have all the answers, even for myself.

 

[tulip2lipservice]

I understood what

you meant and thank you for sharing.

It is sad that we cannot trust as easy as we once did in here. We all come to lit for our own reasons and some of us have found multiple reasons to keep returning. In the whole realm of things the "they" do not matter. I know I do not buy into the "they" on-line and through age the "they" in real life. I do not seek approval of others here unless I know them. The people I have developed relations within this forum I sincerely care for and they know it. People that I admire and trust their opinions.

Violations of ones privacy is one thing that has upset me here at Lit. It just seemed like it went down hill from there. A major line was crossed when things concerning privacy were utilized by others that view this as a game. Most of us choose annominity. It is our choice who we choose to trust and share the details of our lives with and not the choice of another given such information. I always felt that I was open within this forum of who I was and what my feelings were. Now I am just on guard with what I share for again it is predictable when a troll will come in and relish in it all and make it into more than it is.

Again thank you for making me think.

Peace,
Tulip

 

[ridddder]

I get annoyed, yes that some posters read into a post and interpet your post in a way they find offensive whether you intended that way or not. Feeling that way is one thing, but making accusations behind one's back is wholly another. I don't come here for people to like me, either you do or don't. I say what I feel not what I think others will want me to say or would like me to say.

If you have a problem with me at least have enough balls to confront me about it in an adult manner, and not in a childish way either behind my back or in a thread.

Respect is a two way street, as is courtesy.....some people know what is good manners, and others are still in highschool in their minds.

 

[A Desert Rose]

I find this place amusing and entertaining, although I have made a few very good and dear friends along the way.

If my opinion matters a twit to anyone, they had better re-evaluate their life. What I write here should not have an impact on anyone and vice versa, aside from maybe pause to think.

If I note that someone is trying to bait me into a "discussion" that I know will not be pleasant, I walk away. I don't antagonize or provoke anyone but I admit to finding those who do and those who are, quite entertaining.

In short, it took very little time and a couple of experiences with a few assorted people for me to not take this place seriously.

******Now, I am leaving Lit for good... I can no longer take it... it's too depressing... caused me too many heartbreaks... I thought I had friends, but they walked out on me... No one loves me... People pick on me... they call me a whiner...

Just kidding.

 

[glamorilla]

i don't get angry. i have a lot of fun insulting people when provoked.

i do think its pretty stupid that instead of taking advantage of the fact this place is filled with sexy,fun spirited girls some guys take it upon themselves to bash them for it instead of getting to know them better.

 

[Guest]

i don't get angry. i have a lot of fun insulting people when provoked.

i do think its pretty stupid that instead of taking advantage of the fact this place is filled with sexy,fun spirited girls some guys take it upon themselves to bash them for it instead of getting to know them better.

Good point. The people you refer to will never understand it though.