Distance Domination-Support Thread

[EmpressFi]

Ugh. 4 1/2 months? How do you survive? Seriously -- after September I will have about 4 1/2 - 5 months to wait before our next time together if all goes as planned. I am not sure how to last that long... take it one day at a time, I guess.

Our first separation was "only" 45 days. In that time we got literally 30 minutes of phone time and three physical letters. That was painful. But the reunion was bliss.

how did I survive?

well then the other option is to lose him.. we found a way. Mostly we survive through phone calls and IM's and email.. we're never out of contact.. Lots of reassurances are given.. and taking the advantage of the husband's date nights to have date nights of our own where we'll play a computer game together or just "be" together

 

[ecstaticsub]

Maybe two more people pressing for October to come quicker will make it get off its ass and get here! *giggles*

Our next meet is most likely in Oct, too !!

 

[ecstaticsub]

Ugh. 4 1/2 months? How do you survive? Seriously -- after September I will have about 4 1/2 - 5 months to wait before our next time together if all goes as planned. I am not sure how to last that long... take it one day at a time, I guess.

Our first separation was "only" 45 days. In that time we got literally 30 minutes of phone time and three physical letters. That was painful. But the reunion was bliss.

Welcome to this forum and welcome also to life as a military spouse. I've been one for over 20 yrs. I'm sorry to say you will need to get used to separations. Our longest was for a 1 yr deployment, not only do you have the separation to contend with but the fear, too. But with love and trust you both will get through it. While depolyed I used to send him audiotapes of stories I had written, pictures, CDs of music I was listening to--stuff like that.

The first time we were separated was for 3 months for his initial training. He wasn't even able to call me except for about once a week. But we did write lots of letters--sharing dreams of the future, and reliving fun times from the past.

All in all I have enjoyed immensly being a member of the military family. It truly is a family. We have moved over 10 times, but with each move we get to experience new people and new places. I'm not sure I will be very happy when he finally retires and we have to stay in one lace. I can see me getting that itch to move at the 18 month mark. The seperatons aren't fun but in many ways it does make you and the relationship stronger if you continue to make the relationship the number 1 priority.

 

[SubKekiLee]

Well, since someone (thanks again) suggested I pop over here to see all the support/understanding of others in LDRs...

Hi All.
I went from living 6 hours from my boy, to living together, to him living a few states away >.< And soon, we will have an ocean separating us *sigh* Remind me again why I supported/encouraged his decision to join the military? Bah humbug.

It is hard. Lots of phone calls, texts, picture messages so that is nice. No internet interaction, so that is sad. I will get to see him in September... the light at the end of the tunnel. And after that light, another stupid tunnel *laughs* And another light in the form of our up coming marriage (early '09) and me moving overseas so we can be together again.

I am finding it very hard to satisfy my BDSM needs at this distance. I am a touch based person. And yet, in some regards, that aspect in our relationship is growing deeper at a distance. The D/s has become much more emotional and spiritual. He literally started worshiping me which kinda blows my mind... and, in my spiritual beliefs, has some very interesting implications. Still trying to wrap my mind around that one...

Anyways. Yeah. Hi. LDRs are not my preference but there are some silver linings. My heart aches at the distance.

I know how you feel kitten.. Here in the Distance Domination Support thread we are all in LDR's.. Seperatation sucks and saying "farewell" as he says it sucks even more, How we coped with the distance is that we spoke daily on the phone and Im's and emails. It isnt easy but if you love someone you make it work. I was recently relocated by my job back to the east coast where he lives we went from being 2442 miles apart to 3.6 miles apart such a blissful thing.... I worked hard to get to this place in my life.. Maybe sometime soon we will be even closer.. who knows.. Sooooo welcome we are all very sweet here and very supportive.

 

[the captians wench]

Our next meet is most likely in Oct, too !!

three

I'll press since its when my mum comes to stay and I can't wait!

good maybe now it will listen.

 

[the captians wench]

I know how you feel kitten.. Here in the Distance Domination Support thread we are all in LDR's.. Seperatation sucks and saying "farewell" as he says it sucks even more, How we coped with the distance is that we spoke daily on the phone and Im's and emails. It isnt easy but if you love someone you make it work. I was recently relocated by my job back to the east coast where he lives we went from being 2442 miles apart to 3.6 miles apart such a blissful thing.... I worked hard to get to this place in my life.. Maybe sometime soon we will be even closer.. who knows.. Sooooo welcome we are all very sweet here and very supportive.

Guess who's found out it might be possible to relocate with the help of her job.

I have to make a phone ccall today and get more info, but so far I've been told Mcd's does do international transfurs!

 

[BiaTcHiNFiRe]

Today is one of the days when I would really appreciate the real hug and have him by my side.

 

[kittenartist]

how did I survive?

well then the other option is to lose him.. we found a way. Mostly we survive through phone calls and IM's and email.. we're never out of contact.. Lots of reassurances are given.. and taking the advantage of the husband's date nights to have date nights of our own where we'll play a computer game together or just "be" together

When the other option is losing him... you are right, you just have to find a way. We are doing a fairly good job of it right now. We both upped our cell phones to unlimited everything so we can be in more or less constant communication. There is something really cool about seeing something I know he would enjoy, taking a picture, and sending it to his phone. I can deal with my own sadness (more or less) but when he is sad it just breaks my heart. But it also makes me stronger, gives me the chance to lift him up and lend him my strength. So its not all bad.

Welcome to this forum and welcome also to life as a military spouse. I've been one for over 20 yrs. I'm sorry to say you will need to get used to separations. Our longest was for a 1 yr deployment, not only do you have the separation to contend with but the fear, too. But with love and trust you both will get through it. While depolyed I used to send him audiotapes of stories I had written, pictures, CDs of music I was listening to--stuff like that.

The first time we were separated was for 3 months for his initial training. He wasn't even able to call me except for about once a week. But we did write lots of letters--sharing dreams of the future, and reliving fun times from the past.

All in all I have enjoyed immensly being a member of the military family. It truly is a family. We have moved over 10 times, but with each move we get to experience new people and new places. I'm not sure I will be very happy when he finally retires and we have to stay in one lace. I can see me getting that itch to move at the 18 month mark. The seperatons aren't fun but in many ways it does make you and the relationship stronger if you continue to make the relationship the number 1 priority.

There is nothing like another military spouse to understand the special difficulties that come along with this life... but over 20 years? Wow. I do not want to do that, thankfully neither does he, and in four years we are done. Unless we both fall in love with the life... but even then, I do not think I can get used to deployments. I do hope to make friends with other members of the "military family" once we move on base together but... I've already been kicked off a military SO support group -- I am not sure I will fair much better in person >.<

Making the relationship the number one priority is good advice We definitely do that -- that is why I am leaving everything to marry him and move on base. Me, the girl who could only manage to move a block away from mommy, is now planning a move overseas. And I couldn't be happier about the decision.

 

[Daddy2mylilgirl]

Well, since someone (thanks again) suggested I pop over here to see all the support/understanding of others in LDRs...

You're welcome.

 

[the captians wench]

Back to work, and back to working nights. *sigh* We got so spoiled over the past week and a half with me working some mornings and being on vacation. Now it's back to planing out our meetings days ahead of time.

Does anyone else feel just a bit of....guilt...when you tell some one that you can't do something because you have a date, when you know your date consists of IMing for as long as you both can stay awake?

My mom tells me I'm being silly. If I have plans I have plans, and it doesn't matter what they are. Just because chatting online may not seem like a valid reason to miss going swimming to some one else, doesn't mean that it's any less my plans and there for important.

I just really miss him when I have to work nights.

 

[ecstaticsub]

Back to work, and back to working nights. *sigh* We got so spoiled over the past week and a half with me working some mornings and being on vacation. Now it's back to planing out our meetings days ahead of time.

Does anyone else feel just a bit of....guilt...when you tell some one that you can't do something because you have a date, when you know your date consists of IMing for as long as you both can stay awake?
My mom tells me I'm being silly. If I have plans I have plans, and it doesn't matter what they are. Just because chatting online may not seem like a valid reason to miss going swimming to some one else, doesn't mean that it's any less my plans and there for important.

I just really miss him when I have to work nights.

I never tell anyone Ihave a date, buut I have sent the kids out to play or to do chores so I can chat with my PYL. Or I will volunteer to go food shopping by myself so I can call him on the phone. My husband sill sometimes just lash a knowing smile as I make up some excuse. It is all about proper balance. But, I rarely feel guilty.

 

[EmpressFi]

Back to work, and back to working nights. *sigh* We got so spoiled over the past week and a half with me working some mornings and being on vacation. Now it's back to planing out our meetings days ahead of time.

Does anyone else feel just a bit of....guilt...when you tell some one that you can't do something because you have a date, when you know your date consists of IMing for as long as you both can stay awake?

My mom tells me I'm being silly. If I have plans I have plans, and it doesn't matter what they are. Just because chatting online may not seem like a valid reason to miss going swimming to some one else, doesn't mean that it's any less my plans and there for important.

I just really miss him when I have to work nights.

It's not really guilt about the situation, no, but I did feel bad that we used a lie to explain where I was when I was visiting last. I had Malin's parents, siblings, and our nephew all ask me if I was feeling better. I'd nearly forgotten that when Malin had gone to the birthday party for the same nephew, he'd told them I was home sick... they were concerned for me... that's the part that I felt bad about. Not that I'd gone, never that... but that I hadnt just left it at I wasnt able to attend.

 

[ecstaticsub]

It's not really guilt about the situation, no, but I did feel bad that we used a lie to explain where I was when I was visiting last. I had Malin's parents, siblings, and our nephew all ask me if I was feeling better. I'd nearly forgotten that when Malin had gone to the birthday party for the same nephew, he'd told them I was home sick... they were concerned for me... that's the part that I felt bad about. Not that I'd gone, never that... but that I hadnt just left it at I wasnt able to attend.

Having to lie is one of the most difficult things for me. I have almost a totally inability to lie. But when I leave for a few days to see Daddy I have to tell the kids something. I usually make-up something about going to a conference for work. But I don't feel good about it.

 

[myinnerslut]

i wish i could give him a hug

 

[EmpressFi]

Having to lie is one of the most difficult things for me. I have almost a totally inability to lie. But when I leave for a few days to see Daddy I have to tell the kids something. I usually make-up something about going to a conference for work. But I don't feel good about it.

Right..that's where I am.. I dont feel good about it.. I wish it could be different..but there's no way I'm explaining our relationship to a 15 year old.. hell my brother is 51 and I dont know that I'd tell him.. he definitely wouldnt understand.. but the look of concern in those big blue eyes when he asked if I was feeling better... twisted a knot in my gut a little bit...

 

[the captians wench]

It's not really guilt about the situation, no, but I did feel bad that we used a lie to explain where I was when I was visiting last. I had Malin's parents, siblings, and our nephew all ask me if I was feeling better. I'd nearly forgotten that when Malin had gone to the birthday party for the same nephew, he'd told them I was home sick... they were concerned for me... that's the part that I felt bad about. Not that I'd gone, never that... but that I hadnt just left it at I wasnt able to attend.

Thiss will tell you how over dedicated I am to my job, but there have been a few times where they asked me if I could come in later, or stay later and I said "no I can't I have an apointment" or "I'm meeting some one" and really I was trying to rush home so I could IM with Jounar. If I was meeting him face to face, I wouldn't have the same feeling, but I don't know, I guess some times I feel kind of silly for revolving my world around my computer. It's more that I know other people wouldn't understand than about me feeling like I'm doing something wrong. Sort of like my relationship isn't as important as the other managers who have kids and a family at home. Mom tells me I"m being silly and I need to stand up for myself, Jounar says the same thing, and it's also something my former sir here was trying to get me over.

 

[Sexualinnocent]

well then the other option is to lose him..

This is not an option for me. I would be devastated to lose Him. He is my guide, and so much more.

I have not met in the flesh yet the Sir i serve, but it is as real to me as anyone who does serve their Master in the flesh. i am hoping it will be soon...but O/our D/s relationship is growing by leaps and bounds.

But waaa i want to see Him...touch Him...hug...well y'all know.

Thanks for this thread.

 

[myinnerslut]

his arms
my safety blanket
too far to wrap around me

his chest
my pillow
too far to hear him breathe

his touch
my treasured moments
too far to reach my skin

but his humor
the luaghter he draws
still reaches me here

his voice
slightly mechanical
but still from his mouth to my ear

his person
viewed over a computer screen
a small box that lets me pretend to be there

his collar
on my neck
showing all im not by myself

his marks
the scars and peirced initials in my flesh
i carry him with me

and in my heart
i know
i am never alone

 

[serijules]

The average commute here is 10 minutes, and that's very rare lol. The capitol city is 90 miles away and we consider that quite a road trip. I cannot imagine driving 2 hours to get TO work....I think that's nuts. But where I live, that IS nuts, lol.

 

[the captians wench]

Some nights everything makes me miss him.

 

[Homburg]

Some nights everything makes me miss him.

This is a feeling I know all too well. I just have to look up a few posts to see something that makes me smile and yet still miss her like crazy.

----

kitten, my pen has been quiet for some time now. It pleases me to see that yours is working so well.

 

[SubKekiLee]

Finally almost a week later we were able t mesh our schedules... between both of our works... it was amazing... Im sure I need to write about it as it was a fantasy of mine to do what we did... HOT HOT HOT.. but I am on cloud 9 we now live 3.6 miles apart.. from 2442 miles to that.. now we just have to make our travel schedule meet..

 

[the captians wench]

Finally almost a week later we were able t mesh our schedules... between both of our works... it was amazing... Im sure I need to write about it as it was a fantasy of mine to do what we did... HOT HOT HOT.. but I am on cloud 9 we now live 3.6 miles apart.. from 2442 miles to that.. now we just have to make our travel schedule meet..

*huggles* I'm happy for you sweetie.

 

[OneLustyWench]

Can I just say that sometimes, there just isn't enough time? Especially when you have to bow out of his time in order to ensure he sleeps or can get his work done and all the other responsible things to do.

So you are limited to maybe a few minutes to text, maybe to hear his voice.

 

[celticsunspiral]

Finally almost a week later we were able t mesh our schedules... between both of our works... it was amazing... Im sure I need to write about it as it was a fantasy of mine to do what we did... HOT HOT HOT.. but I am on cloud 9 we now live 3.6 miles apart.. from 2442 miles to that.. now we just have to make our travel schedule meet..

Terrific, I know this is what you have been working and planning for. Good for you. I am soooo glad it was everything you imagined.