Is giving oral sex inherently submissive? I’d say that for a man to receive it is an act of trust. If she has me in her mouth, I’m actually as vulnerable as any man can be.
...and oh my... fans self
*shrugs*
I know who I am, so not ironic at all for me.
Dogs and cats have a basic problem in their psychology. To a dog, once they flip the cat on it's back, the fight is over. They have won. The cat has submitted to their dominance. To the cat, though, the true fight has just begun. For a cat, they are at their most dangerous when they are on their back. Their front claws and teeth are dug in to hold while their back claws dig and rake at the tender, exposed belly from underneath.
[\whatthefuckishetalkingaboutnow]
For me, dominance is in the mind. 100%. And just because I am tongue lashing her clit instead of fucking her sweet throat does not mean I am any more submissive to her than when I have her laid across the bed, making her throat bulge with my cock while I slap her pussy.
The thing for me is that... well, I don't know how to say it without coming off all "badass" and "creepy vibe," but, I'm a reasonably tough son of a bitch. And if I can bench press you from a dead start, then lift you into a clean/press with your back against the wall, without ever stopping eating your pussy, then you aren't dominant to me, even if I place you over my face, the better to eat you. And since I've carried a one-eighty pound woman in a basket carry for a quarter mile... **shrug**
Also, for me, bringing my partner to orgasm, particularly when they don't think they can, is a mark of my dominance. I do understand the psychology of orgasm denial (quite well, actually), but my particular brand of Dominance, my particular belief system, is that the more, and more frequent orgasms I can wring from her, are much more of a mark of her submission to me.
And yes, consent is "A Thing" for me. Some might even say too big a thing... right up until I am sucking her clit into my mouth, teasing it with my tongue, with three fingers in her sweet pussy and two in her ass, driving her to one more orgasm than she thinks she can stand to have. After all, she consented to me touching her there, to letting me put my mouth there... She consented to the first five, six, fifteen, or however many orgasms I drove her through. It is only the last one, as she is panting for me to stop just before the last orgasm grips her body unawares and wrings the last of her nectar from her.
At which point I may fuck her, if she asks nicely, and I'm in the mood to grant her that. Or, I may put my shirt back on and walk away, for her to never see me again as I did in one circumstance. ( *shrug* She should have been honest with me that I was her private bachelor party rather than letting me find out through the grapevine she was married the next day.)
I don't know. Maybe much of it is because I have in the past desired it and she (whichever "she" was in the moment) was unwilling for whatever reason to give it to me. In some cases, she was self-conscious that she "wasn't fresh." In others,... Well, frankly, I don't remember all the reasons I have faced down over the years.
But, I think the root of it is that I see her orgasm as the badge of her surrender to me. It is, for me, her true submission to my desires, placing herself wholly under my control.
Even... or perhaps especially... when we are locked in a loving embrace with her mouth on my cock and mine on her pussy and I can drive her mind away from what she is supposed to be doing for me as her sweet, delectable nectar flows into my mouth as she quivers and shudders with my cock against her cheek, panting for breath.
My own orgasm... Well, she can see if she can earn that, if I decide her efforts are worthy of it. Otherwise, nah. I'll smile and settle her under her blankets and we can see if she is a little better next time.
And, as usual, I don't insist that my interpretation is viable for every dynamic. It's just how I see and interpret things.
Any road, however you work things, even if you think I'm full of shit and it's submissive work to orally coax an orgams (or seven) from the Dominant, then power to you. The world can always use more fucking and less fucking over.
***wandering off whistling to look for something else to Puck up***
