❓ PLP Inquires❓

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All of you had valid points, but what about:
-Chick-fil-A waffle fries with their sauce
-Church's crinkle cut (no sauce needed)
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?

They are extremely important. Many times that's all you get.

First impression of me? I am very awkward meeting people, thus resulting in no friends to hang out with.
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?

I use first impressions as a way to deduce basic background information on a person and predict current and future exchanges. However, I am very aware that the more I attempt to interpret, the more I will be incorrect about. I am also very aware that a first impression is situationally based. My impression of a person, first or otherwise, is changed as more information is supplied. My first impression is no more important than the ones to follow and my impression of a person is fluid.

The first impression I make will vary greatly. The waiter in an expensive restaurant at an important dinner meeting will be left with a much different impression than the counter guy at the feed store. The person interviewing me for a position will be left with a different impression than a new mom at a birthday party. Thoughts on my class, income level, and assumptions of my background will vary accordingly. As such, I consider first impressions to be no more meaningful than later impressions, given most people adapt to the situation in front of them. Adaptability is a highly important characteristic of the human species. This holds true during a first meeting as well as altering the perception of an individual as more information and situational dynamics become available.
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?

Yes, in a Work or Professional Atmosphere, however, in a casual atmosphere, not so much, because it seems that is where the masks are the most elaborate.

Yes, you most certainly can get over your first impression of someone, both good or bad, because once you are past that first impression, you are seeing more of the real person underneath it.

Shitty
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?

I try to ignore first impressions. I don't like to judge a book by it's cover. I'm a pretty good judge of character usually, but even so, I'm not a mind reader. Nor do I know what is currently going on in someone's life.

If someone met me right after my brother had passed away (or frankly even a few years after) they'd of just thought I was some snide sarcastic asshole. Wait... I am. Disregard.
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?

That's a difficult one. I think we're hardwired to make some judgements, even if we try not to. And certainly we likely have certain visual expectations of certain professions that aren't always entirely unreasonable.

If my first impression of someone is that they're rude, or that their timekeeping/communication is bad, that sadly IMO rarely seems to be something that doesn't follow through - allowing, of course, for one-off bad situations for that person.

Broadly, though, making firm judgements about someone isn't wise. It'll rarely hurt to wait before forming conscious ideas of the person.

Now, can I get over my first impressions? Yes, absolutely. I've been proven wrong about people enough times to know I can change my mind on them.

As for me? I think it depends how you meet me. Professionally, you'll find someone very reliable. Socially? I think I can come across as detached, which isn't great.
 
08.26.19

First Impressions

How important are first impressions to you? Can you ever get over your first impression of someone? What kind of first impression do you think you make?

I was always taught that a first impression is a lasting impression. However, I like disproving that. Every new job I have worked, I have had to prove that I am harder working and smarter than I look because I am a bigger sized person and I look a little derpy sometimes. I enjoy proving people wrong and making them eat their words so to speak when they discover there is a brain in my head and a big dude like me can keep up. :devil:
 
PLP and I have discussed how people's perceptions are shaped by historical and cultural events in the Audiophiles pod a while back.

That isn't just a shameless plug, it's also a reminder that for minorities the first impression is never that simple.
 
How does that change when you’re in a place where you aren’t a minority? Or does the duality of identity still impact that?
 
How does that change when you’re in a place where you aren’t a minority? Or does the duality of identity still impact that?

I can't speak for other cultures, but mine is an incredibly judgemental culture anyway, so it's more high pressure in a different way. I get fat shamed a lot back in Asia.
 
08.31.19

We've talked about warning other people about people on Lit, but would you want to be the recipient of a warning? What kind of behavior is worth warning you about? Do you need warnings or does it matter who gave it to you?
 
08.31.19

We've talked about warning other people about people on Lit, but would you want to be the recipient of a warning? What kind of behavior is worth warning you about? Do you need warnings or does it matter who gave it to you?

I have been. Most of the time the other person was right on target and had my best interests at heart.
Which behaviors?
Talking behind my back, especially someone I trust. That’s the biggie.
 
08.31.19

We've talked about warning other people about people on Lit, but would you want to be the recipient of a warning? What kind of behavior is worth warning you about? Do you need warnings or does it matter who gave it to you?

First and foremost, 14 year old me feels an undeniable urge to point out that this page 69 of this thread. Phew, maybe he can go back to his corner of my brain now.

It does matter who and how gives the warning, and what they are warning about. If it's an ex-playpartner warning that the person is a jerk, that probably should be taken with a grain of salt. Same if it's someone saying "this person is a bitch/asshole because they don't respond to PMS" because that could so easily be that they just aren't responding to PMs from that person.

But if it's more serious stuff like stalking, threatening, pic saving/sharing, blackmail, etc then I think it should be shared and taken seriously. I guess always with at least some grain of salt, but I think it makes the community better if we call out fuckheads who do that kind of shit.
 
First and foremost, 14 year old me feels an undeniable urge to point out that this page 69 of this thread. Phew, maybe he can go back to his corner of my brain now.

It does matter who and how gives the warning, and what they are warning about. If it's an ex-playpartner warning that the person is a jerk, that probably should be taken with a grain of salt. Same if it's someone saying "this person is a bitch/asshole because they don't respond to PMS" because that could so easily be that they just aren't responding to PMs from that person.

But if it's more serious stuff like stalking, threatening, pic saving/sharing, blackmail, etc then I think it should be shared and taken seriously. I guess always with at least some grain of salt, but I think it makes the community better if we call out fuckheads who do that kind of shit.

Well said. And ummm. 69...hehehe.
 
08.31.19

We've talked about warning other people about people on Lit, but would you want to be the recipient of a warning? What kind of behavior is worth warning you about? Do you need warnings or does it matter who gave it to you?

I guess I’d appreciate that someone cared enough for me to worry and want the best for me. So, in that way I’d appreciate a heads up. I know that there is a lot of history here on Lit that happened before I even knew this site existed, and also that people change over time. I know I have. So, while I appreciate the advice, I will probably tuck that far away and just go with my gut feeling.
 
Nothing said will make a difference if it falls on deaf ears. I will throw out hints, I may even be blunt. But it also isnt my job to live someone else's life. They are adults. So i make a value judgement...can i sleep well keeping quiet?

Tough question...what behavior deserves a warning? I think it boils down to how much I care.
 
08.31.19

We've talked about warning other people about people on Lit, but would you want to be the recipient of a warning? What kind of behavior is worth warning you about? Do you need warnings or does it matter who gave it to you?

Well, what a coincidence. Just dealt with this issue last week.

I think I've only been warned once, but i had already seen red flags and decided to pull away from that person. There are a few people i could have used a warning about. Would i have listened? I would have taken note and filed it away, and it may have caused me to be more alert to potential issues, but ultimately i would have made my own decision, based on my own experience. (It would make some difference who was warning me and how they presented the information, but it's hard to say how much.)

Which is what i expect to happen when i give a warning, as i did last week after having been solicited for my opinion. She's a grown ass woman who by all appearances is blessed with intelligence and common sense, so i told her what i knew and left it at that. I was flattered that she valued my opinion, but i had no expectation of any particular response on her part.
 
08.31.19

We've talked about warning other people about people on Lit, but would you want to be the recipient of a warning? What kind of behavior is worth warning you about? Do you need warnings or does it matter who gave it to you?

I Ihave been the recipient of a few warnings from Litsters. They were each 100% spot on. The topics range from "crazy" and "unstable" to "douchecanoe" to "man pretending to be a woman". I can't confirm the last one, but the people sending the warning have a respectable reputation, and NO reason to lie about that.

Do I need warnings? Let's say I like them when they come from someone I trust.
 
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