Can Skype Break Your Heart

[darkoverlord6]

I'm not even sure why I'm posting this, o.k. that isn't entirely true I need to vent and this is not a subject I can talk to friends or family about.

A month ago I got some feedback on a story I published from a woman who offered me her Skype name in case I wanted to chat directly with her about my stories. I get these from time to time and usually ignore them but for some reason I reached out this time.

It started really casually. We would chat about my writing and she asked some really insightful questions about where the stories came from and my motivation for writing them. Eventually, we both started to open up about our lives a little.

I never thought or intended for it to turn sexual. I'm married and though my sex life has been in decline for years due to health and menopause issues with my wife I've never cheated on her or thought about it. I guess I didn't realize how lonely I was until this woman and I started chatting and things began to heat up between us.

I had never sexted before if you can believe that. The concept actually seemed a little silly and yet to my surprise I found it more exciting than I imagined. It started to become a regular thing three or four times a week for a few hours we would talk dirty to each other basically. Then one day she added to the excitement by sending me naked photos over Skype. I was floored that she would do that and felt like I should reciprocate.

It scared the crap out of me the first time I tried to take photos of myself naked. I'm 50 and in decent shape for my age but this girl was 23 so I feared she would think I looked ridiculous. To my surprise it didn't bother her at all. We kept having normal chats punctuated by occasional sexual ones. I didn't realize how much I was becoming to depend on these to keep me happy.

Out of the clear blue a few days ago I got a text from her that she felt like we should stop the sexting. She was in a relationship that had been rocky for awhile and she thought what we were doing was detrimental to her working on it. I understood and respected her decision but it did make me a little sad that things stopped. She did say that we could still chat together and I figured at least we have that.

Sadly, she has been offline now for four days after saying we would chat again this week. I am starting to wonder if she has decided that talking to me in general was a bad idea. The weird thing is I feel like I did back in high school a million years ago when I got dumped. I've been sad and withdrawn, feeling unmotivated. My wife has noticed but I can't very well tell her that I am down in the dumps because the sweet, intelligent young lady I was sexting with blew me off.

I also don't have a friend I trust enough to tell them what I was doing hence this post. I guess I just wondered if anyone else had ever had a broken heart because of a Skype relationship? I know it sounds a little silly but I kind of felt like we were becoming close and it sucks that she just vanished from my life.

 

[ydahecnot]

Only love can break a heart.

OK, so I like Gene Pitney. And question marks.

Anyhoo, the online world is so fraught and transient, it’s best not to get too deep into the rabbit hole of regret

 

[KimGordon67]

Here's a much longer version of your story

Start at post 110. (Although skimming the earlier posts might provide some context?)
Click here for my thread.

 

[TheMrBurns]

It is absolutely possible. I have been on both sides of the heartbreak equation. The best way to avoid it is to make sure you make your intentions and feelings known and always try to be as honest as possible. And then realise that heartbreak is sometimes unavoidable.

 

[AlwaysFara]

First time, huh?
Rough.

I’m sorry. It’s a bad feeling.

Please just let it lie, chances are she’s working on her tangible stuff.

 

[barefootgirl69]

Yes... online relationships can hurt just as much as any other because we give a piece of ourselves to someone. We all feel silly when it hapoens, thinking we are the only ones, but there are many who have gone through this. There truly is a grieving process.

My advise to you would be to stop thinking about it, just just a little bit more each day. Spend more time doing things with your wife. Fill your time and your mind with other things.

And cry if you feel like it.

bfg

 

[darkoverlord6]

Thanks guys. I think I just needed to know I wasn't alone or being silly for feeling this way. It really is very depressing and that seems so odd that I feel this way about a person I never physically met whose real name I might not even know.

 

[LostGirlTink]

Skype can't... but people sure can.
The Feels sneak up on you and sometimes it's horrible and sometimes it's wonderful and you never know until you are in it.
Be kind to yourself.
Make some friends here who will "get it" if you need to talk about it.
Recognize that in some ways she may have known you in ways no one else ever had... and that's a powerful thing.
Don't feel stupid about it, but know that it will get better.

 

[AlwaysFara]

Start at post 110. (Although skimming the earlier posts might provide some context?)
Click here for my thread.

Miss this lady right here. ^

 

[KimGordon67]

Miss this lady right here. ^

I'm meaning to get back to this thread, and Lit in general, but real life seems to have gotten very busy of late. Mostly in a good way.

 

[AlwaysFara]

I'm meaning to get back to this thread, and Lit in general, but real life seems to have gotten very busy of late. Mostly in a good way.

 

[Mei5ter]

Recognize that in some ways she may have known you in ways no one else ever had... and that's a powerful thing.

Absolutely, 110% this.

 

[darkoverlord6]

I hear you. I actually felt like crying this morning when I got up but I knew my wife would wonder what was going on so I waited until I was in the car on my way to work. It's a bitch to drive and cry at the same time. Here I am a grown man crying over a cyber relationship. I still can't quite wrap my head around how quickly I got involved with this girl and how rapidly she became an important part of my life. I used to pray that my wife would go to bed early so I could chat with her and I would re-arrange my schedule at work to maximize how much time I would be in my office so we could chat and sext.

Crazy right?

 

[beachbaby179]

Not crazy at all. You have so much company all across Literotica. You have no idea.

 

[curvyangel1969]

Not crazy at all. You have so much company all across Literotica. You have no idea.

What she said. The room is pretty crowded. Standing room only .

 

[Mariachoo]

I'd wager that more of us understand *exactly* what you're going through than don't understand what you're going through. When someone really gets you in a way that no one else does, it is a powerful connection - and losing it is beyond painful.

I hope that knowing you aren't alone helps quell the pain a bit. Time heals. It hurts like hell in the meantime, but it heals. I'm sending my best wishes and good vibes - and all my understanding and empathy as well.

 

[KamaKamaSutra]

I hear you. I actually felt like crying this morning when I got up but I knew my wife would wonder what was going on so I waited until I was in the car on my way to work. It's a bitch to drive and cry at the same time. Here I am a grown man crying over a cyber relationship. I still can't quite wrap my head around how quickly I got involved with this girl and how rapidly she became an important part of my life. I used to pray that my wife would go to bed early so I could chat with her and I would re-arrange my schedule at work to maximize how much time I would be in my office so we could chat and sext.

Crazy right?

Nope, any of us who have been here for a while have ended up in this situation. Sometimes its days or weeks sometimes years but you start wanting Lit to be more real than you own life. You find yourself sneaking a quick peak just to see if you have a message, you want every second you can take and you end up looking at things like ok, I can do this and get 5 more minutes here. I can speak from experience, and I think you learned the hard way, we have to be aware that these feelings are real and need to be checked just like any of the ones we experience in RL. We fall in love on Lit just like we do in RL and a lot of times it's easier to do here. I"m sorry your hurt, I hate that you had to have this lesson, but it gets easier and you learn, but that doesn't help right now so again I'm sorry and if you need to talk, The girls that posted above me are great and many of the people who have posted are as well, you can always reach out and talk to people.

A bit of a personal story but I'll tell ya so you know your not alone.
I cried over a girl here for days, but it was my fault it didn't work. She was amazing and I wasn't mature enough to deal with my own life and I wasn't clear on what I wanted. I still get a little pang in my chest when I think of her. I hope she's happy and enjoying her life, she deserves it.

 

[JJonah]

The subtitle of the original post? “Or, This Is What Happens On Literotica.”

This thread should be required reading for newer posters. Don’t worry, OP. It gets better. Some lessons are best learned through painful experience, but you never do forget those lessons.

 

[Deleted member 3041612]

I've been drop kicked in the heart quite a few times. I feel your pain. Know that you aren't alone. There were times I used to stalk HIS posts. It hurts. I know for a fact it isn't easy. I just hope and pray I have not done that to others. If I ever have, my apologies are extended out.

 

[TheMrBurns]

Anyone else feel like some break-up tunes? No, just me?

 

[barefootgirl69]

Anyone else feel like some break-up tunes? No, just me?

https://youtu.be/NJWIbIe0N90
This is my "go to" ...

Someone once said to me to be strong... the code words were "tits n teeth".

We will always have our memories, OP... think of yours and smile remembering the good times.

 

[PrettyLilPussy19]

I hear you. I actually felt like crying this morning when I got up but I knew my wife would wonder what was going on so I waited until I was in the car on my way to work. It's a bitch to drive and cry at the same time. Here I am a grown man crying over a cyber relationship. I still can't quite wrap my head around how quickly I got involved with this girl and how rapidly she became an important part of my life. I used to pray that my wife would go to bed early so I could chat with her and I would re-arrange my schedule at work to maximize how much time I would be in my office so we could chat and sext.

Crazy right?

So relatable. I remember my first heart break. I couldnt keep it in and ended sobbing in bed with my poor confused husband right next to me. I had to make all kinds of excuses.
That was super rough and made me swear to never let anyone close like that again.
My poor little heart it too fragile for that.

 

[darkoverlord6]

Thanks to everyone that has chimed in. I guess I was being a little naive. In spite of being online for many years this was my first real cyber relationship. It never occurred to me that I could get attached to someone out there in the ether. That the joys and pain could be as intense as any real world relationship I've ever had is a surprise to say the least.

I plan on being much more careful with my heart in the future.

 

[barefootgirl69]

Thanks to everyone that has chimed in. I guess I was being a little naive. In spite of being online for many years this was my first real cyber relationship. It never occurred to me that I could get attached to someone out there in the ether. That the joys and pain could be as intense as any real world relationship I've ever had is a surprise to say the least.

I plan on being much more careful with my heart in the future.

I said that very thing.

Guard your heart, these guys are married. But it snuck up on me and, although it saddens me, I am thankful to learn that it is still possible for me to love again. He will always be a part of that. I miss 'us'... but it was perfect while it lasted.

You will soon feel stronger. Keep hanging out with us, we will help.

 

[KimGordon67]

Actually, in the thread I posted above, the 'thing' I had with the guy just before I met TG was a bit like that. He sort of came out of no where, took me on a ride I wasn't expecting at all, and then evaporated. I did send him a long angry email which he probably never received, and then a long angsty email, which he also probably never received.
Luckily I seemed able to compartmentalise well ... I have no idea why. Maybe years of a job in which I need to be together in front of very large groups of people every day helped? And having a long drive between work and home ... I'm very familiar with the driving-cry.