SRP ettiquette query

[ShyMystica]

I was just wondering how long a period should a co-writer be absent before you start to look for a new writer? I am not so pushy as to think a writer should post every day. Real life is a first priority. But if you have a solid story forming, and you wish to continue but the writer disappears without a word of notice, how long is an appropriate length of time to wait until you start to seek another co-writer?

Would love people's input, thoughts or advice.

Thanks to everyone and happy writing/reading.

Yours,
ShyMystica

 

[VampiricTouch]

Well I think it would depend on several things... Do you want to continue the story in the same vein, with a new writer replacing him in the original thread? or...
are you going to start a new thread with the same opening post?

If you're going to continue the story in the original thread, and ask a new writer to replace him.... it's usually a bit harder to find a cowriter to do that. Though I think a reasonable amount of time would be 2 weeks. (it might even take you two weeks to find someone too)

If you're going to continue the story with a new thread, but same opener, then you can do that any time. I don't see anything wrong with having the same opening with different writers. (I know plenty of people do that.) Everyone has their own take on where the story will go, and even if the original missing cowriter comes back, both stories will usually end up different enough to not be too much of an issue.

Thats... just my two cents... I'll be quiet now. Best of luck with that

 

[Alana_]

I've not looked into it here, but on other similar forums that I write on, the rule of thumb is 3 pm's politely asking if they're returning, one pm a week..;that's three weeks in total. Sort of a three strike situation. That's giving a respectful length of time for a RL issue which can't helped by your partner, cause we all know stuff happens we can't help, and internet time can become secondary. Then youre free to proceed as you wish with the thread as you've given them a decent length of time to contact you with sufficient notice that youre wanting to continue the story with them, but after three weeks it frees you from the obligation to sit waiting indefinitely.

Ideally opening a new thread works best, as VT says, its just hard to get someone else to step into an established role by another writer..It also give you more options if the other partner should return.

 

[ShyMystica]

Well I think it would depend on several things... Do you want to continue the story in the same vein, with a new writer replacing him in the original thread? or...
are you going to start a new thread with the same opening post?

If you're going to continue the story in the original thread, and ask a new writer to replace him.... it's usually a bit harder to find a cowriter to do that. Though I think a reasonable amount of time would be 2 weeks. (it might even take you two weeks to find someone too)

If you're going to continue the story with a new thread, but same opener, then you can do that any time. I don't see anything wrong with having the same opening with different writers. (I know plenty of people do that.) Everyone has their own take on where the story will go, and even if the original missing cowriter comes back, both stories will usually end up different enough to not be too much of an issue.

Thats... just my two cents... I'll be quiet now. Best of luck with that

Thanks VampiricTouch.

I guess my only problem was that while it was initially my idea, parts of the storyline were also his. The storyline that is current is what I wish to continue. But you are right...I can use the same opener and see how it goes. I do feel a little guilt at that, lol, but I suppose I can push through it.

I just really wanted other people's opinion on SRP absences. I know there isn't a book that states what is polite and such, but it is also frustrating being on the other end of a disappearing writer with no warning or reasoning why.

So I was just curious what other people thought was a polite time frame to wait before moving on. But also how long you can expect your co-writer to wait for you without hearing from you.

*shrugs* Shit happens, I under stand that. Hell, I have even had to delay a few stories or stop some completely due to life issues, but I always make sure my writers know what is going on. Perhaps it is just me, but I always let my writers know if something is going on. Just seems like, in the very least, the polite thing to do.

 

[ShyMystica]

I've not looked into it here, but on other similar forums that I write on, the rule of thumb is 3 pm's politely asking if they're returning, one pm a week..;that's three weeks in total. Sort of a three strike situation. That's giving a respectful length of time for a RL issue which can't helped by your partner, cause we all know stuff happens we can't help, and internet time can become secondary. Then youre free to proceed as you wish with the thread as you've given them a decent length of time to contact you with sufficient notice that youre wanting to continue the story with them, but after three weeks it frees you from the obligation to sit waiting indefinitely.

Ideally opening a new thread works best, as VT says, its just hard to get someone else to step into an established role by another writer..It also give you more options if the other partner should return.

Thanks Alana You both make a lot of sense and good points. I fear I have sounded like a bitch, but really, I was just curious of what the 'unwritten' rule was.

Thank you guys for your help! *hugs tightly*

 

[VampiricTouch]

I currently have a thread that will probably never take off the ground even though I adore my opening post. Part of the reason is because the entire story, including the opening post was prompted by the cowriter that vanished off the face of the earth without word.

As sad as I am that the thread will not continue with him, I also will not restart the thread and open it for another writer. Just because I feel like that thread itself is his idea and it would be disrespectful for me to take the idea and bring it to someone else.

So I definitely understand the story line/ opening post issue. But if you started the opening post, and then discussed the story with the author, then the opening post is still yours to play with I think.

 

[sallythescorpian]

There are a number of variables. Personally, if my rp partner doesnt post, I dont PM them. If some one is interested, the thread should be good, if they have to be reminded to post, then they either dont have the time or the inclination.

If someone hasn't posted on other threads or on the boards, then perhaps a PM after a week or ten days is fine - RL issues have probably come up, and I'd just delete the subscription to the thread. If they come back, and PM you to see if your still interested, you can decide then if you want to continue. It's a little rude to just vanish, with no word, but these things happen, and allowances must be made. If they are posting elsewhere, they have lost interest, and your better off to move on, and do something else with someone who is interested, rather than waste your time, flogging a dead horse.

If its a thread you really really like, then you have a couple of options:-

If its your idea, you can try to get someone else to take it over, but everyones style is different, and I dont think this tends to work well - part of the reason you liked it in the first place might be down to your rp partners style, someone else taking it over might spoil it - also its hard to get someone! Your other option is to repost and find someone else, and start afresh.

If the initial concept was the errant rp partner's idea, then think about what you liked about it, and try to come up with something containing those elements and post that as a new thread.

That's my take on it anyway! Good Luck!!

 

[YourDemonLover]

No excuses if your done with a thread say so.

Say so directly to the person in a pm, not in one of those mamby pamby generalized srp absence threads that keep popping up, they are a cop out ,using them is just plain rude to your co-writer! (Supposing they even read them, why would they unless it was their thread in the first place?)


The only excuse for failure to communicate is death or serious sudden illness, over which none of us have any control!

 

[Alana_]

I wasn't implying that a person should pm to solicit a post if that's how my reply sounded..There's nothing as bad as a pushy partner, counting the posts made to someone elses thread and then whining about ' posting for her/him, but not me'.
What I meant was after a period of no posts anywhere, usually 3 weeks is the accepted norm on rp forums, then pm, three times over a further 3 weeks. At that point a partner has the right to know what's happening, if the other partner hasn't pm'd to let them know they'd be away in the first place..

I agree it's very very rude to just vanish..And again I know real life can toss a rock that leaves internet activity forgotten about or at the least put to the bottom of the to do list..God knows I've just had a shit run myself, but I let my partners know that were directly affected ..
I believe if a partner has given their time to establish a thread, regardless who the thread starter is that partner deserves 2 seconds of courtesy of a pm to say 'sorry won't be back' ect.

I personally put too much time into my threads to be left wondering if a partner is ever going to come back..I believe I have the right after a length of time to ask,
''Hey there, hope your ok, but I've not heard from you in a while, and wanted to know are you still interested, cause it's ok if you're not. I just need to know before taking on another story..Take care''

and with no reply, or a reply that at least lets me know yes or no, I get to move on with my thread or begin something new with someone else.. All nice and tidy, with me after covering my back.

 

[Alana_]

No excuses if your done with a thread say so.

Say so directly to the person in a pm, not in one of those mamby pamby generalized srp absence threads that keep popping up, they are a cop out ,using them is just plain rude to your co-writer! (Supposing they even read them, why would they unless it was their thread in the first place?)


The only excuse for failure to communicate is death or serious sudden illness, over which none of us have any control!

I disagree with you about the absence thread. We've all got readers too that some people don't chat to via pm, but we'd like them to know too that so and so won't be around for a few days.
Also, I don't see the harm in politeness no matter where it's found, be it a thread or pm..Use either. Mamby pamby or not, it costs nothing to be mannerly.

 

[hunting_tiger]

You will never know the reason why your partner doesn't post for a while, sickness, broken computer or other real life issues.

It's a pitty if a story stops before it is finished but I have only managed to finish two stories over the years I have been posting here and I think many share my experience. It's been me at times, it's been my writing partner other times but it's real life even if we try to create a virtual reality.

I sometimes have ment to say something before going away for a week or two then something comes up in the last minute that changes my plans and I just disappear.

I wouldn't recommend that you continue the story with another writer unless you both only have made a post or two, finding someone that can replace your original partner will be difficult and ... Who wants to be a substitute?

Start a new story with another partner and tell him/her that your posting might be slow (if you are like me).

If you are one of those that takes part in 10 stories at the time then an 11th wouldn't be a problem

Good luck whatever you choose to do.

 

[YourDemonLover]

I disagree with you about the absence thread. We've all got readers too that some people don't chat to via pm, but we'd like them to know too that so and so won't be around for a few days.
Also, I don't see the harm in politeness no matter where it's found, be it a thread or pm..Use either. Mamby pamby or not, it costs nothing to be mannerly.

No offense intended. We were asked for an opinion, I gave mine.

 

[zydrate]

Well, here's what I think/do:

My SRP profile says it all about what I'm looking for. I also state as a personal rule in my SRP profile that I'm not going to PM any one if they're not going to post. If after a week they don't respond to a post without PMing me first, then I'm going to unsubscribe to that thread and it's my prerogative to start a new thread with the same opening post if I want.

And yes, real life will ALWAYS comes first, it does for me. And if that same writer wants to continue it later that's fine, or if they even want to try another thread, then that's perfectly fine. All I ask is for communication and I will do the same, if I plan to be gone, I will let them know.

I really hope that doesn't make me sound like a bitch because I'm not. I just know what I want.

 

[ShyMystica]

Thanks to everyone who posted their thoughts. As I thought, the issue can vary from person to person, and I am amazed at how stark the opinions can be!

I suppose in the end it comes down to how respectful you are with your co-writers.

Thanks again and happy writing everyone

Yours,
ShyMystica