KRCummings
Uh...
- Joined
- Apr 25, 2004
- Posts
- 76,511
Do you guys ever wonder why no one ever envies you?
I just figured it was because I didn't have a penis.
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Do you guys ever wonder why no one ever envies you?
I found Le J's critiques on his other site. He's a hardcore...something or other, but it has to do with "the unborn" (not babies).I just figured it was because I didn't have a penis.
I found Le J's critiques on his other site. He's a hardcore...something or other, but it has to do with "the unborn" (not babies).
Here's a sample critique:
Re: Eka's Portal Writing Group - June 2009 - All Submissions In
Postby Jacquelope » Fri Jun 12, 2009 1:32 pm
This is my critique of Shadow_Walker's B.L.A.N.D.:
Okay, so the foxes are actually avatars into which two human minds have been virtually put for the purposes of this experiment? The real humans are actually somewhere else? And I guess I can see their lack of utterly violent shock and awe at waking up and realizing they're animals, considering they don't even remember their names. It's a stretch but I can see that happening.
What I can't get is how quickly the male somehow realized the female needed to eat him, and how she came around to accepting this. Even with her stomach growling so painfully, it just didn't make sense. To make this work, I'm left to assume that maybe the computers A, C and D (and maybe the human, B) put them up to this, which would coincide with the discussion about free will, and all that?
Oh and their emotions ... it seemed so... bland. (Yeah, I know, flog me for that one!) Of course, I can understand that, too, considering you might have been trying to squeeze this into as close to 2000 words as possible. The problem is I didn't see any justifiable progression from the vixen being hungry as heck and the male fox offering himself to her and her accepting. She should have started out ubersquicked by the idea; I mean, even foxes don't eat foxes. (What do foxes eat anyways?)
Now, the post vore discussion between the computers reminded me of the start of a debate I would have walked out of at the outset. Server A was acting close-minded from the start, and C, well, that hypocrite was one that I wanted to hit with an EMP. As for revealing holes? IMHO, B was driving aircraft carriers through the gaps in their thinking. Sideways. D was the only one that seemed to be totally impartial. This part of your story was actually far more interesting to me.
Shadow_Walker: I am not sure whether to suggest that you should make the vixen more disgusted about swallowing the male and break down her objections by slow, logical or emotional progression, or to suggest that you explain a little more about how the computers forced this to happen. I kinda feel dumb because I'm at a loss as to the full premise of the story.
Lack of sex is making you cranky.
Bend over.
am I coming across bitchy again?
Yeah, it's some kind of "vore" fantasy thing. I have no idea what that is. It's him though--he posts about the data center, getting fired, the wife's office. Nothing about kids. It's free to register. Obviously, I did.That's some serious geek there.
People who pack heat and aren't afraid to use it do not write shit like that.
Yeah, it's some kind of "vore" fantasy thing. I have no idea what that is. It's him though--he posts about the data center, getting fired, the wife's office. Nothing about kids. It's free to register. Obviously, I did.
He's what I've always thought: a 20- or maybe 30-odd-year-old white dude with a white wife and a middle-level job at a middle-level place that lets him telecommute so he can indulge his RPG habit. All the rest is one more RPG.
Yeah, it's some kind of "vore" fantasy thing. I have no idea what that is. It's him though--he posts about the data center, getting fired, the wife's office. Nothing about kids. It's free to register. Obviously, I did.
He's what I've always thought: a 20- or maybe 30-odd-year-old white dude with a white wife and a middle-level job at a middle-level place that lets him telecommute so he can indulge his RPG habit. All the rest is one more RPG.
You guys ever heard of a place called Eka's Portal?
If you think I'm anything nearly as bad or stupid a person as you are, then c'mon over.
Warning, though, you'll have to hold your grudges against me and keep your Literotica drama to yourself - or your ass will get kicked the fuck off. The people there are about your age or younger but they're more mature than you, well behaved, well mannered, talented, and they won't tolerate your bullshit for ten seconds.
Bets are you'll be intellectually bested by someone there in about 5 posts.
Reported for spam.![]()
Did you check it out? It's lame.
An adult world! OMG! It's the mungos! Hide!1!!#1!!!!!LOL and of course you know I don't expect to see you show up in either venue. I'm sure you're gonna browse those sites now and feel belittled just reading their posts.
No one hurls racial slurs on either site nor do they threaten to cut your tongue out. It probably looks like an alien world to you.An adult world! OMG! It's the mungos! Hide!1!!#1!!!!!
Purple isn't really my color. It looks like a crayola box threw up on my monitor.
There's been enough consistency in other elements that I can believe there is a data center, a wife's business, maybe kids. Maybe black, maybe white, how are we to know online? The rest is (obvious) fiction. I've always gotten the feeling that this was his first job that paid real money, which, to me, made him young.I can maybe believe he's black. I get the feeling he's not faking that so much as exaggerating it. You could be right though.
Totally agree with the rest. It's pretty much how I've always seen him.
And I know you fuckers won't follow me because you can't start shit like you do here.
On Eka's or Tribe, I won't need to kick your face in the mud - you'll probably be banned by a mod before I come back and see your threats, racial slurs, namecalling, etc.
You have a habit of starting shit here and then crying foul when I kick you back. Won't happen there. Your "free speech" rights will just mysteriously disappear. LOL.