The European Madness Festival

I can't honestly say "yes, she DOES look like that", because no-one's ever seen her without make-up.
 
Comment from the couch: "I'm convinced someone killed her years ago and that this is a stuffed animatronic."
 
And another one: "Look guys, a constipated Dane."

Seriously, looks like he's passing a major one.
 
Chicken! I was hoping to see her jump from there and land perfectly on her stiletto heels, in a Charlie's Angels style.
 
Oh, magawd, Azerbajjan's almost here! Quick! Run! Run away while the French are singing! It's the only way of saving your dinner!
 
*checks for other signs of the end of the world*

The FRENCH are singing in ENGLISH????????????????????????????????????
 
Yes. He sniffed helium from a blow-up globe. Awesome.
 
We see that everytime a winning country has something NEW, it's copied the next year. We had monster rockers after Finland, we had dancers after Romania, and now we have gays and bis after Serbia won last year.
 
Did no one tell the guy in the chair about head mikes? The stand is bigger than he is. Wait, is that a man?
 
Oh, if only the whining little boy with the spooky white eyes would slip on the wine they just spilled..!
 
You're all going to think I've gone mad, but I'm now officially rooting for France. And Azerbaijan kicks ass! It reminds me of a beer commercial.
 
That was bad on an epic scale. So bad it deserves to win.
 
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