✨Highlights and Bombshells💥

To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it? Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it? Do you wait for them to come to you? Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable? Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet? How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things? Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
Depends how close I am with the person. For people I care about I'll try my damnedest to reach out and talk and try to resolve things. For people I'm not so close with, I just don't usually have the energy. But I also don't have the energy to go out of my way to make them miserable. I usually try to keep things quiet and not involve other people. But in general, it's not a problem that I have very often. I've only been harassed online or in person very rarely. Online it's usually easy enough to block or ignore folks. In person... well, if I know you in person there's a better chance you're someone I'll want to resolve things with. But again, this is mostly hypothetical. It's not that I'm so wonderful that no one has a problem with me. I just don't think most people find me interesting enough to have a beef with me to begin with.
 
I'm not sure that all of my answers will necessary lighten the mood, but some might. Here goes:

1. I haven't had a birthday cake for more than twenty years.
2. The hoover is very good at eliminating them quickly without unnecessary trauma (to me or the spider).
3. Pasta.
4. In the UK, the number of people who do not understand how the EU works is staggering or did you mean about me? If so, the list is very long, so you'd have to be more specific :D .
5. Indoors away from people or doing the parts of my job where I am in control.
6. My favourite bird is the Snipe.
7. This is a really tough question for me at the moment. Can I answer that the best thing that has happened lately is that the UK did not get blocked from this site and come back to you?
8. When a Hobby flew more or less over my head about ten or so years ago. I'd been trying to see one for years and, of course, when it finally happened, it was when I least expected it.
9. I have talents, none of them proven :D !
10. I actually did make something similar with my best friend way back in 2007. She had just split up with her boyfriend, was back home at her parent's and I went around there and we made grilled feta pitta bread. Nothing has ever topped that since and unless a Spanish or Nordic beauty comes along nothing will :D .
11. Carlos Ruíz Zafón for writing La Sombra del Viento (Shadow of the Wind). This is the only book that I have never been able to put down.
12. No. The world is in a terrible, dark place and the UK is in a dreadful state in particular.
13. Fresh strawberries or raspberries, expensive dark chocolate, or high quality honey.
14. I rather like being human, although immortality would be nice too.
15. I've had a few new experiences recently, but none of them are cheerful, so I will keep those to myself.
16. Being able to visit my parent's house during the summer and have a long holiday there.
17. Moving to another European country. Needing to find a job there and my ability to live and work in Europe having been destroyed by both Brexit and covid has resulted in those already optimistic visions trickling off the canvas like water colours in the rain.
18. To my best friend (see above), but I used to write her lots of letters when we were university students, so I already have.
19. For those of you who have ever seen Endeavour, I relate to that character so much. There are also two famous quotes that I connect with. The first is from Shadow of the Wind ('There are worse prisons than words') and the second is from Doctor Who and I will simply link the clip:
20. I can only choose one? That is not possible :p ! Who designed this questionnaire anyway :p ? I suppose right now it would have to be The Bangles and 'Set You Free' for all the relationships that I wish that I'd had, but I never did:
. Still, as Belinda Carlisle once sang 'There's no future living in the past, you can dream, but you can never go back'.

If you've made it to the end without wanting to throw metaphorical darts at me for failing abysmally to lighten the mood, I thank you :) . It has been a bit cathartic writing some of it out. It has been a very nine years for me.
Lovely to read that someone thinks exactly the same way as I do on “Shadow of the wind”. Really a great book ☺️
 
Depends how close I am with the person. For people I care about I'll try my damnedest to reach out and talk and try to resolve things. For people I'm not so close with, I just don't usually have the energy. But I also don't have the energy to go out of my way to make them miserable. I usually try to keep things quiet and not involve other people. But in general, it's not a problem that I have very often. I've only been harassed online or in person very rarely. Online it's usually easy enough to block or ignore folks. In person... well, if I know you in person there's a better chance you're someone I'll want to resolve things with. But again, this is mostly
I originally gave that a thumbs-up to express agreement with the post - but that looked like I was agreeing with this bit...
hypothetical. It's not that I'm so wonderful that no one has a problem with me. I just don't think most people find me interesting enough to have a beef with me to begin with.
...and I'm certainly not agreeing that no one finds you interesting - so I've changed my reaction accordingly!

But I sympathise completely with your wider point about personal energy being finite, and wanting to make the best and most positive use of it. There will be a small prize for anyone who can name the OG Dr Who episode where the Master tells the Doctor that "Hatred is Strength" - but my near-Lit-namesake was wrong in every important respect (to quote another 1980s sci-fi classic).

There are some people online, including on Lit, who have learned to be very good at being unpleasant on the Internet. There are plenty of other people online who seem to enjoy watching them do so. I have no interest in acquiring this 'talent', and seeing others exercise it just makes me feel uncomfortable.
 
To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it? Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it? Do you wait for them to come to you?
I can be touchy, but it takes quite a lot to make me properly upset with someone. Anyone who can make me that upset is probably going to be someone I'll want to salvage something with. I won't claim to be better than anyone else at difficult conversations and repairing things, but you of all people know that I've had to do that in my offline life this year, so you'll confirm that I've tried!
Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable?
No. Again...you know my star sign, and when I was much younger I was more likely to think that way. But I simply can't be bothered wasting energy on making people upset unless they've done something really unspeakable...and probably not even then? There are better and more satisfying ways to sort these things out.

Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet? How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things?
If I'm going to try to repair things with someone, I try to involve as few other people as I possibly can. I just think it's easier if we can be messy together without having to worry about what anyone else sees or hears? The more you escalate things publicly, the harder it is to scale them back. But, online and offline, there are people who feel they need to vent and share very publicly indeed. Again, you know of one offline situation I'm dealing with where someone did exactly that. I respect that not everyone keeps their feelings close as I prefer to, but when I'm doing one thing and they're doing the other, it doesn't always make reconciliation easier.
Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
Yes. I have it at work occasionally, and while it's unpleasant I have to accept it's part of my job. It sometimes involves the police, and in one case the person involved ended up going to jail for eight months (not directly for what they did online to me and my company but over related offences). It is depressingly easy for people to send anonymous emails to law enforcement and other authorities if they have a mind to, and we have to take even the most blatantly obvious malicious nonsense seriously. I'm sufficiently used to such things that I don't lose sleep over it, but it's not nice.

In my early days on Lit, I had problems with someone who - by their own admission - didn't take rejection well. They posted things on Lit threads publicly, and I didn't respond. Whether or not that was the right thing to do, I don't know, but when someone is being obnoxious to get my attention and provoke a response, my immediate reaction is not to give them what they want.

Lit is full of people vagueposting. I suppose I've been the intended target of one or two over the years, although I talk to so few people here that I tend to assume it's not me. On the very rare occasions where it (almost certainly) is, I don't dignify the post with a response, but I do just keep half an eye on who jumps in to like that particular post. It can be quite revealing :)
 
who can name the OG Dr Who episode where the Master tells the Doctor that "Hatred is Strength"
I believe that's The Deadly Assassin, if I'm not mistaken.
To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it? Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it? Do you wait for them to come to you? Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable? Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet? How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things? Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
I don't tolerate pettiness well. If I'm upset with someone I will talk to them directly. If they are already being petty there's no sense in waiting for them to come to me about something..I've dealt with two very petty people for the last 15 years in my work environment and I just don't tolerate it anymore. I don't try and go out of my way to make it awkward or uncomfortable, but I will approach it head on and I know that may make some uncomfortable if they aren't anticipating a confrontation, no matter how peaceful it may be. I'm not that different online, I'll confront something head on. I'll be kind and patient to a degree unless they don't relent. If it's taking too much energy, thankfully in the online world we have ignore buttons. :)
 
To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it?
I hate conflict but I hate lingering, unsolved issues even more.
Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it? Do you wait for them to come to you?
Directly. I don’t like lingering confusion or misunderstanding. I reach out. I send messages. I try to talk it out. Until there is an impasse or of course the other person doesn’t respond. I can’t do anything about that and it’s really frustrating. It’s very hard to accept and it takes a long time to get past.
Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable? Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet?
At work, I stay professional. There are strategies to fall back on- techniques to help us work though conflicts. And actually those are really helpful to focus on when emotions get high.

Outside of work, I try to stay quiet and not engage.
How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things? Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
Online, it’s easy to hide behind a monitor and be vicious and cruel. And the pack mentality is real.

I’ve made good use of the ignore feature here. When I have had times when I’ve felt upset with someone or that I’ve thought they were mad at me, I’ve messaged them and asked them, or apologized if I’ve offended them. Sometimes I can tell they don’t want to talk to me so I leave them alone. I’d much rather talk through a conflict though.

In person, it’s much easier to work through a misunderstanding. So much gets lost in translation online.

There is a point at which I’ve reached my limit and I’m out of patience. When it is clear that someone is unwilling to respect my boundaries, I have no choice but to sever that relationship.
 
To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it?
I rarely get upset with people. If I do, I try to figure out why that did or said whatever made me upset. But I do make a habit of immediate . . . hmmm, I don’t want to say confrontation, because it doesn’t have to be a bad thing, how about clarification? I go directly to “why did you do that?” Or “what does that mean?” And I want an answer—right now, in the moment, so the answer will be a little more pure. I don’t have to like the answer, but I would like for it to at least make sense. If it doesn’t, then maybe that person just dropped a rung on my care ladder. 🤣

Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it?

Yup.
Do you wait for them to come to you? Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable?
I think I do make people uncomfortable when I do that, not intentionally, but most people don’t like being called out on things. But I also want people to be honest and direct with me, because it's possible that I’m the douchebag and, if so, I’d like not to be, so tell me!
Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet?
I don’t stay quiet. 😎
If I’m really lost about a person’s actions, I might bring it up to friends for thoughts and advice. But I’m not into the “Let’s gang up on that person” attitude.
How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things?
Online people can simply be ignored. That one is easy for me.
Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
No. No one would harass me. 🤷‍♂️


On another note, I think the only time I find pettiness delightful is at work. When a new “policy” comes down, thought up by a complete moron, that we all know is a disaster, I take a certain delight in being petty, encouraging everyone to follow the new guidance to the letter and watching the place burn.

I am a total dick in that respect. 😎
 
  1. What was your last memorable encounter with something found in nature?
Last night, I was able to see a volunteer excavate a sea turtle nest after the eggs had hatched to make sure that there were no stragglers that hadn’t been able to make it to the water. Also she was counting the eggshells to see how many hatchlings there were and how many unhatched eggs there were.

It turned out that there was one leftover hatchling that was released to the ocean and one unviable egg. Here you can see all the shells from the successful hatchlings. This was something I’d never seen before.

It was pretty amazing. 🐢

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Last night, I was able to see a volunteer excavate a sea turtle nest after the eggs had hatched to make sure that there were no stragglers that hadn’t been able to make it to the water. Also she was counting the eggshells to see how many hatchlings there were and how many unhatched eggs there were.

It turned out that there was one leftover hatchling that was released to the ocean and one unviable egg. Here you can see all the shells from the successful hatchlings. This was something I’d never seen before.

It was pretty amazing. 🐢

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That’s so awesome!
 
To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it? Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it? Do you wait for them to come to you? Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable? Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet? How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things? Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
I have, at earlier pints in my life, been pretty good a giving cold shoulder when I was angry. It’s not a very healthy or happy way to live. Now, if I’m upset I can get quiet. And it can feel like I’m giving someone a cold shoulder, but I’m really not. I’m trying to process exactly what it is I’m upset about before saying anything.

This doesn’t always work out but, but it’s better,

I’m more likely to speak faster in the real world, simply because being able to actually talk to someone and let them hear your voice so they can be reassured your words aren’t as angry as they may seem is easier. Online it’s always a balance. Time to talk isn’t always available but written words can be interpreted so poorly, so I try to make it clear that I’m processing, not being evasive. But…I mean…you know…people don’t like hearing that either, understandably,

I think the big thing is establishing the trust that if I’m upset (or if I’ve upset you) I’m not interested in assigning blame or inflicting retaliatory pain. I want to understand what, if anything, needs to be fixed.

I fortunately haven’t been the target of any focused bullshit.
 
Lit is full of people vagueposting. I suppose I've been the intended target of one or two over the years, although I talk to so few people here that I tend to assume it's not me. On the very rare occasions where it (almost certainly) is, I don't dignify the post with a response, but I do just keep half an eye on who jumps in to like that particular post. It can be quite revealing :)
Oh man, so much this. The passive aggressive groupies are quite a thing.
 
Questionnaire
Let’s (high)lighten the mood! I love a good questionnaire, especially one that allows for some creativity. Below you will find 20 questions. Yes, 20. That’s a lot. You do not have to answer all 20. You can answer whichever ones you want to answer. We won’t judge.

  1. Do you make wishes on your birthday candles before blowing them out? Would you care to share what your last birthday wish was? I can't tell you what I wished for! 😋
  2. You discover a spider in your kitchen. What do you do? I would attempt to relocate it back outside, unless it was breaking the house rules of being in my personal space... then... goodbye spidey.
  3. What is your favorite comfort meal? A really good spaghetti Bolognese
  4. What is something about which people have a misconception? About me? That I'm shy.
  5. Where do you feel the most at peace? In nature. In the forest, or on the river.
  6. Finish this sentence. My favorite _____ is ______. My favorite colors are green and purple.
  7. What are you looking forward to? Moving into my new house on Thursday this week. Woohoo!
  8. What was your last memorable encounter with something found in nature? I watched a herd of elk running through a valley. That was awesome.
  9. Hidden talents or hobbies? Something you are trying to master? I play roller derby.
  10. If you could make grilled cheese sandwiches with anyone alive or dead, who would it be? And what is your grilled cheese recipe? Hmmmm... my cousin that makes a really good grilled cheese. My recipe is cheese and bread lol.
  11. Who are your heroes or heroines, real or fictional? I look up to a friend of mine who has a reputation for being a "bitch" but she is an incredibly successful business owner, and not a bitch at all. People just don't like that she expects her employees to do their jobs. What a concept, right?
  12. Are you optimistic about the future? Yes. I believe whatever energy you put into the universe, you will receive back. So far, it seems to be trending in the right direction.
  13. What is a smell that stops you in your tracks? Smoke. We had wildfires here recently and the air was horrible for about two weeks.
  14. If you could come back as any organism, what would you come back as? A dog.
  15. What is something new you’ve done recently I went white water rafting for the first time recently.
  16. What's a small, seemingly insignificant thing that brings you immense joy or comfort Drinking coffee in the morning.
  17. What's a goal or dream you've been hesitant to pursue? What's holding you back, and what's one small step you can take towards it? Yoga teacher training. I'm actually going to do it in September. I started a program a few years ago but had to quit because of a family medical emergency and the time I had to take to care for a loved one.
  18. If you could write a letter of appreciation to someone who deeply impacted your life, who would it be and what would you say? One of my instructors from school. It would say a lot of things because our lives are mixed professionally and personally. She is like a second mom to me.
  19. Describe a time when you experienced a deep connection or understanding with another person. What made that moment special? It's been a while since I've had a deep connection with someone. I recently connected with someone whose business and health-affiliated goals align with mine, and make me excited for the future. I haven't had a personal connection in ages though that was really special.
  20. If your life had a theme song, what would it be and why?
“She’s a Rainbow” just feels like me. It’s colorful, uplifting, and has this mix of lightness and depth that I really connect with. I try to bring that kind of energy into everything I do—whether it’s supporting someone through healing work or just showing up with a little brightness in everyday life. The song has a playful vibe but also feels genuine, which is how I try to move through the world.
 
To Be or Not To Be…
…petty, that is the question. When you are upset with someone, how do you handle it? Do you talk with them directly and try to worth through it? Do you wait for them to come to you? Do you do everything in your power to make them uncomfortable? Do you involve your friends? Do you stay quiet? How does it differ for you online vs in person, or does it? What are the benefits of both ways of handling things? Have you been on the receiving end of online harassment? What do you do when that happens?
I seldom get upset with people. Sometimes a few of my younger coworkers will make a mistake that I have to correct them on but its more of a minor irritation than actually being upset.
When something does upset me I handle that shit promptly. I got enough on my mind and don't need something just lingering.
I do not involve others in my problems.
I don't really get harassed or bullied.
It doesnt matter if its IRL or on here (this is the extent of my online footprint).
 
Oh man, so much this. The passive aggressive groupies are quite a thing.
It bewilders me.

I get there are moments where we need to yell into the void. But Lit isn't a void. Everyone can see hear you. And the void reacts and talks back. And remembers.

I get that there are moments where people really annoy or upset us. Including friends. Offline, you'd call a friend or meet them if you wanted to talk that out of your system, right? Privately? You wouldn't hire a public venue, put up neon signs announcing GROWNUP BITCHING CRYPTICALLY IN HERE, and livestream the whole thing on Twitch.

Sheesh. I need a coffee.
 
Lights, Camera…ugh!
You just heard that your beloved book is being turned into a movie. How do you feel about that? My usual reaction is something between outrage and mortal terror. Oh please ohpleaseohpleaseohplease don’t let them fuck it up. But there have been only a few instances that I can recall in which I felt the movie held a candle to the book.
Cartoonist Tom Gauld captured a few ways that literary works are “enhanced” when turned into a movie. (You can find more of his work in his book, You’re Just Jealous of My Jetpack. )
IMG_8778.jpeg

My question to you is, what movie do you feel really mangled the book upon which it was based, AND (this is a two-parter), were there any movies that you felt were well done or did a service to the original work? TV shows count, too.
 
Two movies come to mind at the moment that mangled epic novels:

Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (the 2010 film)

It felt like the makers of this film didn't understand its target audience. They aged the characters up, removed key mythological elements, rewrote characters’ personalities, and ruined plot threads that were supposed to stretch over the whole series. Riordan (the book author) himself disowned the script. I'm hoping the series Disney has been putting out gives this book series more glow because it's awesome, and the movies sucked.

Also...

The Dark Tower by Stephen King

Trying to condense seven dense books into one 90-minute movie was a bad choice. Characters were underdeveloped, and the sprawling epic worlds King created were overlooked.

On the flip side...

“No Country for Old Men" by Cormac McCarthy..
The dialogue is often word-for-word, and the haunting tone of inevitability and moral decay is preserved.

And...

“The Princess Bride” – William Goldman wrote both the book and the screenplay, and the result is a near-perfect adaptation. It's one of my all time favs.

And while I'm thinking about it... I'm conflicted on this one...

"The Shining " by Stephen King.
While this movie went far away from the original novel, it was scary as hell, and incredibly memorable! I love this movie. Since I saw this particular movie first before reading the novel, I was surprised to find that the book is way different! Scary as hell in its own right, but definitely not the same.
 
Two movies come to mind at the moment that mangled epic novels:

Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (the 2010 film)

It felt like the makers of this film didn't understand its target audience. They aged the characters up, removed key mythological elements, rewrote characters’ personalities, and ruined plot threads that were supposed to stretch over the whole series. Riordan (the book author) himself disowned the script. I'm hoping the series Disney has been putting out gives this book series more glow because it's awesome, and the movies sucked.
OMG my daughter FREAKS out whenever anyone mentions this movie. Enraged is a more appropriate word for how she is whenever there is discussion of The Movie That Shall Not Be Named. She loves this series so much and so when she saw the movie…


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OMG my daughter FREAKS out whenever anyone mentions this movie. Enraged is a more appropriate word for how she is whenever there is discussion of The Movie That Shall Not Be Named. She loves this series so much and so when she saw the movie…


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I feel her pain, and so does my oldest! She kept yelling at the screen because she was so mad lol. I don't blame her though, we read them together and I sat there watching mostly confused because everything about that movie was whack.
 
Two movies come to mind at the moment that mangled epic novels:

Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (the 2010 film)

It felt like the makers of this film didn't understand its target audience. They aged the characters up, removed key mythological elements, rewrote characters’ personalities, and ruined plot threads that were supposed to stretch over the whole series. Riordan (the book author) himself disowned the script. I'm hoping the series Disney has been putting out gives this book series more glow because it's awesome, and the movies sucked.
FWIW my kids never liked Potter but were obsessed with this series (we had to buy two copies because my eldest was a bit possessive 🤣) and really enjoy the Disney+ series.
 
I accept that books and movies can’t be the same. I prefer that a movie take the concept and be its own thing. The two examples I can think of where the movie blows the book away are The Shining and Jaws.

I know a lot of people love The Shining book, but I find it dull and we all know what happens when I’m a dull boy. 😁

I’ve never heard anyone say that Jaws, the book, was better than the movie. I found the book to be a total bore.

Also Frankenstein. I’ve tried reading that book a number of times and I just can’t get through it. But the 1931 movie is one of the very best!

Dracula is my default answer to favorite book. And I have yet to see a movie do it right. I love Bela Lugosi and he will always be Dracula to me, but that movie is lacking.

ETA: Psycho!!! The book is a cheap, dark pulp novel, the movie changed the way we watch movies forever!
 
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Lights, Camera…ugh!
You just heard that your beloved book is being turned into a movie. How do you feel about that? My usual reaction is something between outrage and mortal terror. Oh please ohpleaseohpleaseohplease don’t let them fuck it up. But there have been only a few instances that I can recall in which I felt the movie held a candle to the book.
Cartoonist Tom Gauld captured a few ways that literary works are “enhanced” when turned into a movie. (You can find more of his work in his book, You’re Just Jealous of My Jetpack. )
View attachment 2556642

My question to you is, what movie do you feel really mangled the book upon which it was based, AND (this is a two-parter), were there any movies that you felt were well done or did a service to the original work? TV shows count, too.
It depends a lot on the director attached. I think film and writing are very different mediums, that convey emotions and ideas with different strengths and purposes. I generally do not want a super faithful adaptation of a novel. I want an adaptation that utilizes the strengths of the new medium to highlight aspects of the story in ways the book cannot.

Fincher’s adaptation of Fight Club is nearly perfect, it differs from the book but is so visually striking that its critique of masculinity is hard to miss (though so many, many, people still manage to)

I also like adaptations that sort of skewer the ridiculousness of some books. I grew up loving Robert Heinlein but Verhoeven’s Starship Troopers perfectly highlights how silly and self-important that book was.

Finally, I love adaptations that modernize and streamline works that have good elements but maybe….the writer could have used some more editing. Up until the ending Game of Thrones did this so well. The Wheel of Time series on Amazon was also really good at tightening up a horrible meandering plot as well as having some idea as to how adult women actually act (I’m very disappointed at its cancellation). And finally, The new Interview With a Vampire series is fucking perfect. It takes what is best about those books and crafts a far more cohesive story. Louis and Lestat always should have been the center of the story IMHO.
 
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