filthytrancendence
Overlong Replier
- Joined
- Apr 18, 2021
- Posts
- 526
I really appreciate that. I got some hard to swallow feedback on that one which echoed a lot of what you're saying.Just finished reading, five stars and favorited, left a comment. I'd like to see you explore how this couple developed their relationship up to this point. Seems like there'd be a great story right there. Also the young lady. How did she arrive to the point that the first man who treated her decently made such a strong immeidate impression on her.
The scene where she described the wife approaching her, that'd be a good story, too!
I've always said the best stories are the ones that after you finish them, you wonder, "What would have happened next?"
I think the correct direction for a 'sequel' is from Evelyn's perspective, filling in some of those details but also just spending some time characterizing her more directly. Part of me wishes I'd have had that foresight to simply write the whole thing from that perspective, but that's a useless regret. Anyway I think it's a good way to continue the narrative in a more stand-alone way that will improve the original indirectly if done well.