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The new asshat awards; best of the worst messages

I always figured I got blocked after I replied. LOL

I admit it, I'm snarky with troll PM's. If they can't figure out that I'm well and thoroughly owned it means they didn't read my profile (lazy) or they don't care (rude!!!!) so I reach deep down into my switchy side and let 'em have it.

A girl's gotta have a hobby, right? :cattail:
 
desertslave said:
I always figured I got blocked after I replied. LOL

I admit it, I'm snarky with troll PM's. If they can't figure out that I'm well and thoroughly owned it means they didn't read my profile (lazy) or they don't care (rude!!!!) so I reach deep down into my switchy side and let 'em have it.

A girl's gotta have a hobby, right? :cattail:
Click to expand...

Definitely!! :)
 
This is about as close I'm likely to get:

and fuck you too asshole!
ok, so I didn't address who the hell I was referring to, but it's assholes like you that make the world so fun to play in. JEALOUS MUCH???
 
midwestyankee said:
This is about as close I'm likely to get:

and fuck you too asshole!
ok, so I didn't address who the hell I was referring to, but it's assholes like you that make the world so fun to play in. JEALOUS MUCH???
Click to expand...

I challenge you to write me a PM that will land you in the asshat thread :D Total anonymity, of course! :D and I get a lot of crap emails... :p Just sayin! People go out of their way for this shit... :eek:
 
Ok, 'fess up. Who's created an alt? Zero posts, signed up yesterday and now I get this:

bitch u think ur beter then oters u need fucked real good
Click to expand...

Is that you, MWY? Did you take up on CnC's suggestion about starting to create asshat messages? If you did, you have a bright future ahead of you. ;)

Edit: I had to reply.

Far be it from me to raise myself categorically above otters, I sure know better than that. They are way better swimmers than I am, for example, but I'm sure I crochet better than they do. I'm sorry if my posts come across like I'm trying to put down otters. I'll pay more attention to that from now on. Pinky promise!
Click to expand...
 
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^^^^

Love your reply! ( ^ω^ )

(o_O) But why would anyone PM a message like that to you???
 
Collar_N_Cuffs said:
I challenge you to write me a PM that will land you in the asshat thread :D Total anonymity, of course! :D and I get a lot of crap emails... :p Just sayin! People go out of their way for this shit... :eek:
Click to expand...

How do you know I haven't done this already? I could have been the astute author of Seela's memorable message, immortalized above. :p
 
MeekMe said:
^^^^

Love your reply! ( ^ω^ )

(o_O) But why would anyone PM a message like that to you???
Click to expand...

Clearly otters are very important to someone. :)

midwestyankee said:
How do you know I haven't done this already? I could have been the astute author of Seela's memorable message, immortalized above. :p
Click to expand...

I'm not completely sure someone who uses words like astute and proper grammar could bring himself to write "then" instead of "than" and miss the second T on otter. Hmm.
 
seela said:
Clearly otters are very important to someone. :)



I'm not completely sure someone who uses words like astute and proper grammar could bring himself to write "then" instead of "than" and miss the second T on otter. Hmm.
Click to expand...

Wouldn't this be one of the simplest ways to disguise oneself?
 
It's not exactly a private message... and it DID make me laugh (but not smile, and not in any good way...) So I'll just leave this here.
attachment.php
 

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Stella_Omega said:
It's not exactly a private message... and it DID make me laugh (but not smile, and not in any good way...) So I'll just leave this here.
Click to expand...

:D
On the other hand, The poster only has 6000 years to cope with, that makes it almost too easy.
 
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desertslave said:
I always figured I got blocked after I replied. LOL

I admit it, I'm snarky with troll PM's. If they can't figure out that I'm well and thoroughly owned it means they didn't read my profile (lazy) or they don't care (rude!!!!) so I reach deep down into my switchy side and let 'em have it.

A girl's gotta have a hobby, right? :cattail:
Click to expand...
Agreed!
 
I know this isn't the correct forum, but there doesn't seem to be a thread on the correct forum and I'm not sure if I can start a thread about assholes there. Referring to Editor's Forum. The BDSM Cafe seems to be only forum hosting any kind of asshat thread.

If you will indulge me: I'm not a volunteer editor to be abused by wannabe authors. I wish I could place the story and all the emails so that the piece of shit can be properly denigrated.

Long story short: Asshole sent me an email telling me he had a story (1st timer), he wrote chapter 2 because his friends told him chapter 1 was funny. His friends were lying. He tells me not to edit for content/ characterisation etc etc, just fix the grammar.

The problems started when I could not open his attachment. I finally managed to open part of it in the email and copy it across. No help from him - he didn't respond to requests to change his settings and try to resend it.

I edited the grammar as asked and sent it back. No thank you or anything, just "where's the rest?". He eventually pasted the rest in an email and I copied once more.

Without identifying the ass here's the beginning and the end of the emails.

"My name is ???, and to say I'm an amateur writer would be a bit of an understatement.
I have received very positive feedback about my story, (not submitted as yet).
I would like to keep the actual content as it is, I would just like some help with the punctuation and flow."

Me - back to him - "Please send me your first chapter in word.doc form as an attachment.

I do not mark all changes if I'm editing the punctuation and grammar only. I do mark changed words and inserted words so that when you get it back you can see what I've done.

The time period for responding depends on the amount of work I do on the chapter and the other editing I'm currently busy with. I do generally have a first read within 24 hours."

The email accompanying the second part of his 'work' which I sent to him- "I suggest you re-write the chapter.
The purple prose kills everything.

http://www.debstover.com/purple.html

Read what purple prose is and fix your project. The readers will dismember you painfully if you submit it as it is.

Because I only fixed spelling, I request not to be credited in your submission.

I'm sorry I don't have more time to discuss this with you. I suggest you go back to the list of editors and try to email somebody who has time to work on this with you. Nothing personal but I have a lot of work at the moment and I am not giving you my best. Sorry. Please try to find someone with less work because you really need to work through this with someone.

Also it is your settings on your ipad or pc, look at your settings please, everybody else's submissions open for me. It's important that you fix this because other editors might not even bother to respond to you if they cannot open your work."

His reply - this is why he's an asshole. - "The funny thing is that's exactly the reaction I'm after. I'm not a serious writer, I'm just here to make people laugh. I am well aware of the 'purple prose' in my story, it is there for a good reason. My story was written to offer an alternative to the usual boring 'sexy' romance novel.
I first approached you with my story because it said you looked at 'Humour and Satire'. It's clear to me now that you don't actually possess a sense of humour, so I clearly chose the wrong editor!
Oh and a bit of a tip. Don't agree to edit someone's story then change your mind and say you're 'too busy' once you've read through it. It's disrespectful to me, and it paints you in quite an arrogant light."
I didn't say anything about the humor or the lack of it. I didn't insult him either. I told him from the beginning what I would do - so this is what I get for doing as he asked?
I'm more than just a little pissed off, I understand now why there are so few volunteer editors. I'm not here to be abused.

Thank you for allowing me to rant, and palpitate.
 
Collette, it sounds like he has a wounded ego and reacted defensively. That's unfortunate. Even the most accomplished writers take strongly worded feedback from editors.

Thank you for the link on purple prose. I wasn't familiar with that concept.
 
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