The history of nobody liking me.

[pink]

If there's nothing after death, everything is meaningless.

Waaaaaaaaaa


You don't want to get better. You just want to cry like a baby.

 

[gunhilltrain]

If there's nothing after death, everything is meaningless.

As I said to you before John, you are free to sit in the park and watch the sky until you die, probably from lack of water in about a ten days. Actually, I think you'd get so thirsty that you'd go down to the river (the Bronx River runs through my park) and drink from that. I'm not sure how clean that water is, but it you might get away with it a couple of times. Your first bit of meaning: quenching your own thirst. Battles have been decided by such things.

https://bronxriver.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/Bronx-River-Blueway-Map-crop.jpg

 

[gunhilltrain]

If there's nothing after death, everything is meaningless.

Besides, what are you going to do in the afterlife if you can't even live in this life? What would you like it to look like, what do you wish to do there? You've got some plan, like meeting long-gone relatives? I actually had a relative, nearing his end, you said he promised to meet me there, "in heaven." I guess he assumed that neither one of us was going to the "other place."

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

If there's nothing after death, everything is meaningless.

How so? Humans make meaning on their own all the time. We make up rituals and jokes and stories that matter to us. We don’t need a god to give meaning to our lives.

Plato was an idiot. There is no deeper essence casting its silhouette on the walls of the cave. It’s just us making shadow puppets.

 

[Debbie]

A life well lived with love, family, happiness, experiences, memories, friends, learning is not meaningless or pointless even if there is nothing after death.

 

[JohnSm123]

Besides, what are you going to do in the afterlife if you can't even live in this life? What would you like it to look like, what do you wish to do there? You've got some plan, like meeting long-gone relatives? I actually had a relative, nearing his end, you said he promised to meet me there, "in heaven." I guess he assumed that neither one of us was going to the "other place."

I must open another thread about that.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I must open another thread about that.

Why? Gunhilltrain’s post is on topic for this thread. Making a new thread breaks the flow of the ongoing conversation.

 

[JohnSm123]

Why? Gunhilltrain’s post is on topic for this thread. Making a new thread breaks the flow of the ongoing conversation.

Nah, there's way too much I could say about that topic to derail this thread.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Nah, there's way too much I could say about that topic to derail this thread.

Is this thread going to be about the afterlife? Perhaps you shouldn't bother. I mean, why worry about something that is not affecting you at the moment, and about which you can't do anything about. Although, maybe God does choose to look like Morgan Freeman.

By the way, it's within Lit protocol to derail your own thread, and to perhaps complain about somebody else who derails it. Not that it doesn't happen all the time.

 

[gunhilltrain]

We are biological machines. Anything we feel is nothing more than a result of biochemical brain activity that is beyond our control. Unless you believe there is such thing as soul. In that case, I'm waiting to listen to your arguments.

Actually, have either of you seen the 1982 version of Blade Runner? Of course, it's science fiction, and here it is 2023, four years after the "time" of the movie, and we still don't have self-aware "replicants." It's probable that we may never, but yet every movie, play, and TV show about robots, androids, etc., at least ponders the line between humans and "machines" or other artificial entities. Or as the Bishop, one of the androids in Aliens says, when referring to himself, "I prefer the term 'artificial person.' "

 

[Debbie]

Is it derailing or going off on another tangent?

I think we should start a petition to laurel for another forum rule.

No derailing threads unless you have written permission from the thread starter.

 

[Thedukeofomnium]

We are biological machines. Anything we feel is nothing more than a result of biochemical brain activity that is beyond our control. Unless you believe there is such thing as soul. In that case, I'm waiting to listen to your arguments.

We are biological machines. Anything we feel is nothing more than a result of biochemical brain activity that is beyond our control. Unless you believe there is such thing as soul. In that case, I'm waiting to listen to your arguments.
Okay, I'll bite
As you probably know, there are a bunch of arguments against physicalism, at least as it is ordinarily understood (some people consider panpsychism a form of physicalism, and I don't mean to include that. view in this critique.
First, Thomas Nagel's famous "What is it like to be a bat" article--from the 1970s when materialism was rampant and hardly challenged in anglo-american philosophy. Basically the point is that while we know or can reasonably infer some things about bat. consciousness- they presumably feel hunger and lust and pain, but we can only understand these batty characteristics by analogy with our own conscious experience... You can know everything about bats "from the outside' and not be able to conclude on that basis what, e.g. it is like to perceive the world via echolocation. Space aliens with sense organs very different from ours can still have a complete scientific understanding of you and me (as such an understanding comes down to mathematical structures, rather than felt smells and tastes, and they would still have no idea what it is like to see a red rose.. Of course you don't have to use these elaborate examples.. other people are often mysterious, and the extent to which we understand each other is based on having shared experiences, interests, world views etc.
I can go on ad nauseum about this. Oh, I also think we can ressurrrect Plato's argument for immortality in the Phaedo, but that is just me, most philosophers think it fails (and it does need to be tweaked to be made plausible.

As for your social situation. i had a very rough childhood, to the point that i was so shy it took me three attempts to check out a shyness book from my HS library... but I found in college there were kindred spirits, misfit intellectuals and artists, who i could relate to.. The best way to make friends for me is finding. people who share an interest and then just run with it.. follow your passions, as long as they don't involve murdering people or voting for Trump.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Is it derailing or going off on another tangent?

I think we should start a petition to laurel for another forum rule.

No derailing threads unless you have written permission from the thread starter.

It's derailing if it's your own thread and you object, which many people don't do. It's going on a tangent if it's somebody else's thread.

Petitioning Laurel? On another forum will compared that to petitioning the Wizard of Oz; the real one, not the guy behind the curtain.

 

[butters]

The best way to make friends for me is finding. people who share an interest and then just run with it.. follow your passions, as long as they don't involve murdering people or voting for Trump.

this ^^

 

[Debbie]

It's derailing if it's your own thread and you object, which many people don't do. It's going on a tangent if it's somebody else's thread.

Petitioning Laurel? On another forum will compared that to petitioning the Wizard of Oz; the real one, not the guy behind the curtain.

I've seen her bosoms. I am a believer.

 

[CuttingEdge]

You have to like yourself before other people start to like you.

You have a lot of pent up anger inside, most likely from being alone a lot and having this self-monologue, this self-talk that ends up being a conversation with yourself that just elicits more anger, yet when you vocalize or use media, you blame other people for your problems and anger.

It's all inside you, but thankfully that is easy to fix.

You really need a therapist that will work with Conative Behavior Therapy and not chemical pills. You just need to change your mindset and not numb down the anxiety or anger levels using pills. You just need to change what steers you wrong. When you hear yourself talking to yourself, and bringing out this anger... STOP, spin it around. Try rephrasing it, texting it, or journaling the same thing, but to a friend, or someone you have a crush on. You don't have to actually do that, just rephrase it as if you were. When you do that, a person tends to use nicer words, are more understanding, and more forgiving. Over time (just a few weeks) a new habit develops where you don't beat yourself up over little things, or take the slightest infraction and churn it into a froth. You deal with yourself in a much kindler manner... like you would a friend... or someone you have a crush on... and from that your anger dissipates inside. You are breaking the self-destructive self-talk that you have inside you.

Try it, it really works and you got nothing to lose. It doesn't even cost any money...

 

[CuttingEdge]

What do I mean?

Lets say your boss wants you to get some work done that is going to take two hours after work to do. Inside this self-defeating conversation begins in your own mind.

'I hate that my boss thinks I will just do what he says. I am so stupid for just doing whatever he wants. Bill does nothing all day but watch YouTube... he could have easily done it if he actually worked. He never works. But nothing is ever said to him. They ask me, because I always do it. I can't say no. I really need to find a new job. This one doesn't pay enough anyway...'

Sound accurate for a self conversation?

But would you say that to a crush if she told you, she had to stay 2 hours late to do a job for the boss? HELL NO! You would put it in much softer terms.

"Yeah you got to stay late, but at least you will get overtime out of it, and your boss trusts you to do it. It sucks you don't want to stay late, but its nice knowing your boss can count on you. Your job has got a lot of amazing fringe benefits, so 2 extra hours is worth it just for that".

Over time, with journaling, texting, or just switching the first conversation to more and more of the second in your mind, you stop working yourself into more and more anger. You put a more positive spin... a more realistic spin... on things. You stop being the victim, and you stop all the internal rage.

Its life changing if you can apply it and make it a habit.

 

[gunhilltrain]

I've seen her bosoms. I am a believer.

Cool! So what city is Laurel, and thus Lit, based in? Denver, Ottawa, Zurich, Melbourne? In my more paranoid fantasies, I imagine that Lit is mostly plugged into a powerful computer (obviously not as powerful as Skynet or the Matrix; we're not there yet) but it might be possible to build such a machine. Maybe "Manu" is the sole human programmer for the moment.

"I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you."

In that scenario, there was a Laurel twenty years ago, but she eventually got tired of it and handed it over to technology (which wasn't capable enough yet at the beginning of the 21st Century).

 

[gunhilltrain]

John, this is your thread, so complain about me if you wish. By sheer coincidence, I found this article. I'm trying to wrap my head around it.

https://www.theguardian.com/technol...ning-human-toll-content-moderator-meta-openai

‘It’s destroyed me completely’: Kenyan moderators decry toll of training of AI models​

So if I get this straight, African people are being paid less than $2 per day, by an American company working for another American company, to "filter out" sexually explicit materials from - something.

https://www.sama.com/

https://openai.com/

This is pure speculation, but what is stopping Lit from hiring, say Sama AI to do the moderating for them? And then there is the "dark side." What is stopping these companies, with their other hand, from providing sexually explicit materials to other entities (call them pornographers?) who want to filter in explicit materials? Cover both angles with different customers, in other words.

As the Kenyans interviewed revealed, "The 51 moderators in Nairobi working on Sama’s OpenAI account were tasked with reviewing texts, and some images, many depicting graphic scenes of violence, self-harm, murder, rape, necrophilia, child abuse, bestiality and incest, the petitioners say." By the way, much of this material was lifted from chat room dialogue from various sources.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Correction: the Kenyans are getting paid less than four dollars per hour. "Workers were paid between $1.46 and $3.74 an hour, according to a Sama spokesperson."

 

[Shaglus_Ziegler]

Back in school, I was the socially invisible kid. You know, the one nobody ever talked to. They talked to me only when they wanted to make fun of me. That little by little turned me into an asshole.

So when people of my age finally started trying to get to know me and hang out with me (in college), I had in the meantime grown so mad at all people in the world, no exceptions, that I kept them away (by literally shoving them away whenever they talked to me). And so, I spent my young adulthood without having any friends either. In the same period, I constantly got banned from forums for being an asshole, but I didn't care.

Later in my life, I tried to become more likeable. But it was too late. Now I wasn't in school or college anymore, and whenever I had a job, it was not in an environment in which I could make friends. Online, I wasn't an ass anymore. But even when I read the rules beforehand, even when I tried my best not to be banned, I still ended up banned somehow.

One time, I joined a forum about cellphones. I didn't even have a cellphone, but I liked the environment. I hanged out in the General section, without ever posting anything about cellphones. One time, a member complained about that. I asked, "Is it against the rules to post only on the General section?" He/she answered something like, "No, but it's annoying." A few days later, I was perma banned.

Isn't that similar to what happened here a few days ago? When members started complaining about me posting without writing stories, although it's not against the rules, I could feel the same vibes from back then, so I already know my fate is sealed. Even if mods tell me they won't ban me, I still know they will, because there were other forums in the past in which mods told me the same thing, and I still ended up banned without knowing why and without anyone ever responding to my emails.

My verdict is that I lack social skills. But it's too late to get them in my 36 years of age. It's not something specific I do in real life or a specific rule I break online: it's the general aura I emit that puts off people around me.

Now all that is left to do is go and give my parents a good beating for not having bothered to teach me some basic stuff when I was little (OK, maybe I won't beat them up; we'll see ). I'm still sure that sooner or later, I'll unintentionally do something that'll put off people here too, and so I'll once again be banned without ever being told the reason or receiving responses to my emails. There is nothing you or the mods can say to convince me otherwise. Even God Himself (supposing He exists) wouldn't be able to convince me otherwise. I'm just hanging around here waiting for the inevitable to happen.

Why I don't attend a psychiatrist? Because that person will help me only because I will pay them. Which confirms my theory that nobody cares about me. The psychiatrist is no exception, they don't care about me; they will help me only because I pay them. And I don't think a psychiatrist can help me anyway. I mean, I used to attend one in my early adulthood for years, until I realized that guy just took my money to tell me pretty much what anyone else could have told me.

Do you disagree with any of the above?

Never too late to change. Eat a bunch of mushrooms and go out in the woods for a few days. Discover passion and mystery and eternity. We’re just here a while, might as well live it up!! Cheers

 

[Shaglus_Ziegler]

John, this is your thread, so complain about me if you wish. By sheer coincidence, I found this article. I'm trying to wrap my head around it.

https://www.theguardian.com/technol...ning-human-toll-content-moderator-meta-openai

‘It’s destroyed me completely’: Kenyan moderators decry toll of training of AI models​

So if I get this straight, African people are being paid less than $2 per day, by an American company working for another American company, to "filter out" sexually explicit materials from - something.

https://www.sama.com/

https://openai.com/

This is pure speculation, but what is stopping Lit from hiring, say Sama AI to do the moderating for them? And then there is the "dark side." What is stopping these companies, with their other hand, from providing sexually explicit materials to other entities (call them pornographers?) who want to filter in explicit materials? Cover both angles with different customers, in other words.

As the Kenyans interviewed revealed, "The 51 moderators in Nairobi working on Sama’s OpenAI account were tasked with reviewing texts, and some images, many depicting graphic scenes of violence, self-harm, murder, rape, necrophilia, child abuse, bestiality and incest, the petitioners say." By the way, much of this material was lifted from chat room dialogue from various sources.

New world order! They’re giving out free shots! Be wise! We are the carbon they want to destroy!! Fuck em. I’m eternal. Cheers

 

[Silvergrizzly31]

None of this will matter, not the great book advice, the ways to help live...nothing until YOU want to make the change. It sucks, and not in the way we are used to being on Lit hehe, but it is the truth. Good luck with this

 

[Errorusernametaken]

That would take me a week to type on my phone and it's too long to read. My advice for everything is fucking grow up already.

TBH people like you who espouse this kind of sentiment are the problem. Living to irritate or antagonise others is no life at all.

 

[Saint_Ann]

TBH people like you who espouse this kind of sentiment are the problem. Living to irritate or antagonise others is no life at all.

There there, It'll be ok.

Is that better?